Freddy: Welcome to my cooking show! I will be showing you how to cook a sexy dish like mine! Well not exactly like me, cuz you'll never be me. But ill teach you to cook sexier than you!

Freddy: Today ill cook my most famous dish, Pingas soup! First of all I need an old man!

Golden Freddy: *in a ninja suit with a old man detector in his hand*

Freddy: I advise you to have a partner with you while you hunt down the ferocious beast!

Golden Freddy: *scanning the room*

Old man: *pops out of nowhere* NAUGHTY CHILDREN

Golden Freddy: *le gasp* GET OVER HERE

Old man: *super sayian chant*

Golden Freddy: Oh hell n- *flies across the room*

Freddy: *grabs old man and shoves him down a pot* Thats ingredient number 1! Now we need a-

Chica: PIIIZZZAAAAA *pushes Freddy out of the way and shoves 93939 pizzas down the pot*

Freddy: *ded*

Foxy: PINGAS PINGAS PINGAS PINGAS PINGAS *shoves bonnie down the pot*

Bonnie: I NEED MY JUSTIN BIEBER LAWYER!!!

Freddy: MAMAF**KER! I told you to stay out of my cooking show!

Everyone besides Golden Freddy and Freddy: *shoving random things down the pot*

*huge explosion*

Shrek: *comes out of the pot* IM COMING FOR THE BOOTY

Everyone: AHHHHHHHHHHH

Now for a word with our sponsor!!!

*Jurassic park harmonica theme song comes up*

Fredbear: Tired of teletubbies invading your yard?

Springtrap: *enters his house* WHAT THE F***

*1 millon teletubbies inside his house*

Fredbear: Are they eating everything in your pantry?

Springtrap: Wait don't they eat tubby custard? *sees pantry* MAMAF**KER!

Fredbear: Then buy TeleRepellent! #1 product of the year! Just grab the bottle and stick it up your anus! Then, it will magically make them go away!

Springtrap: *sticks it up his butt* Wait I don't have a butt...

*a magic pink powder appears*

Springtrap: Wow its-

*39848329928475382929 teletubbies break in*

Teletubbies: TUBBY CUSTARD! NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM

Springtrap: FUUUUU WHAT IS THIS MADE OF *explodes*

Fredbear: Buy it today! *dies*

Now back to the show!

Foxy: Our little friend Freddy has gone to take a lil break

Freddy: *in a corner wearing a straitjacket* I NEED MY LAWYER

Foxy: Stop....HAMMERTIME! *dabs*

Freddy: ......kill me