Sunday

Wei Ying somehow managed to get to their room. He aimed straight for the bathroom, hurled up the gastric adventures of that afternoon and washed his face, waiting for the room to stop spinning.

Whatever this was...he just wanted to forget it.

Forget everything, forget this hotel bathroom, the room itself, the hotel, and even Singapore.

He had come here with such high hopes just two days ago...and look what had happened to him!

Shakily, he clutched the walls for support and made his way to his bed. Some kind soul had made it neat and tidy for him, but suddenly, he couldn’t stand the thought of staying here a minute longer.

Inevitably, Lan Zhan would return, and would probably be in a celebratory mood...and Wei Ying just did not have it in him to join in.

Maybe in a couple of days...maybe a week.

He needed more time to get over this thing...and he laughed cruelly at himself. It wasn’t even a real relationship and he was mourning it like someone had died. And the truth was, inside his chest, his heart was shattering again and again.

This pain...it was indescribable. A continuous wave of hurt as it increased and bled away, only to return with more force. It felt as if instead of his heart, there was a glass plate, and someone was throwing it to the ground again and again.

He only had to make it out of the hotel. If anyone saw him, he had to look normal and he promised himself some quality time in the nearest available toilet, whether that was on the next plane out of here, or at the airport...but he was going home.

Once that decision was made, Wei Ying felt infinitely better.

All he had to do, was put some distance between himself and Legs-for-Days Lan Zhan and everything would be okay.

Work was another story...maybe he could apply for a transfer, or work for another department...but that was a problem for another day.

Right now, he had to get his shit together and leave.

The room stopped behaving like a windmill and Wei Ying was able to stand. Since he had puked out most of the alcohol, he was feeling tremendously better now, and he threw all his clothes and bits and pieces into his suitcase.

He could text them from the airport...that was no problem.

And he was ready to go.

By some miracle, the same mad, racing taxi driver picked him up from outside the hotel and Wei Ying made it to the Changi airport in record time. He finally took a lungfull of air when he'd modified his original ticket. There was a small fine, but Wei Ying would have paid any amount of money to be able to leave now.

Wasn’t it the strangest feeling, to see and feel that he wasn't as strong as he thought he was? To have to congratulate Lan Zhan, to smile and be able to say the words, I'm happy for you...just thinking it was making his mouth flood with acid.

No...he simply could not.

Luckily, he was just in time to board a cancelled seat on a flight out of Singapore. He slept on the plane, declining a meal, but they were offering drinks and Wei Ying obliged.

He had one thought, and one mission only, which was to drink himself into oblivion.

Whatever this was, it could not hurt him if he wasn't conscious, and Wei Ying was intending to knock himself right out.

His alcohol tolerance was quite high, but he paced himself well, in spite of this.

By the time he got into a taxi to get back to his apartment, he was only halfway there. And it was easy to buy a couple of bottles of the hard stuff from the Seven Eleven below his abode. He glanced out of the window to the pavement outside where only sixty hours ago, he had been rather happy. And now... he was literally minutes away from a meltdown.

He grabbed his change and his purchases and lugged them to the elevator, a sense of urgency moving his feet faster and faster.

Once inside his apartment, he carefully put the bottles on the small table in front of his couch...the same couch he had bought from a yard sale with Lan Zhan. They had carried it up the stairs because it wouldn't fit inside the elevator but Lan Zhan was strong and they had managed it together.

Together...

The first tears fell.

He grabbed his phone and messaged his Shijie to tell her not to worry, that an emergency had come up and he was required to leave. He would think up another excuse for leaving his job, later.

One problem at a time.

He didn't bother getting a tumbler, since he was intending to get trashed as soon as possible, he decided to just drink straight from the bottle.

The first mouthful burned, the second was easier.

In fact, he didn't even have to open the second bottle; three quarters of the way into the first one had him seeing double.

It was too risky to stand up, so Wei Ying thought he should just lie down there...if only he could remember what to do with his feet...

They looked so lonely down there...like he was...all by himself.

He wished Jiang Cheng was there to call him names. That would definitely make him feel better. He picked up his phone and decided to send him a message. Something to really annoy him...then he threw his phone far away from him and closed his eyes.

********

Some time later he stirred...there was a noise but he couldn't quite make it out, like his brain was wrapped in cotton wool.

Everything hurt, his whole body was on fire and his mouth was dry. It was far, far easier to close his eyes and go back to the darkness.

Like a warm, thick blanket, this deep nothingness gave him security, kept him safe,  and away from things... all the thoughts he was trying to protect his heart from. His mind skittered away like a bug under a rock.

Sleeping was the best.

*********

Monday

Wei Ying had figured out how to lie down. The couch was incredibly comfortable and his best friend now.

Couches didn't lead you on, couches didn't make you fall in love with them. They were safe...

But there was a persistent noise...not close to him but loud enough to annoy.

Wei Ying rolled off his best friend with a groan and lay there, on the floor for a good few minutes.

Standing up was a bad idea...but crawling...crawling was better. When the noise stopped, he curled into a ball and just lay there.

Unfortunately today, the Universe didn't love him because that offending noise started back up once more.

It was...he fought to remember...it was his ring tone. And so...where? Where was that infernal noise coming from?

He really tried to remember the previous night but it was a solid blur.

Hadn't he thrown the damn thing away?

He opened one silver eye and slowly tilted his head. Slow was good...fast was bad, very bad...

He rarely drank this much...and there was a reason why...because feeling this shitty...was it worth it?

Ah...there it was! The subject of all his current misery. Just under the television cabinet. He could reach it from there.

His fingers reached under the wood and pulled it out.

"Hello?" He replied, groggily.

There was a string of expletives and colourful name calling.

Wei Ying waited for that noise to stop but Jiang Cheng was on a roll.

So he hung up.

He must have passed out again because this time when he woke up, his phone had died and sunlight was streaming in through his windows and hurting his head. Maybe if he kept his eyes closed...?

Jiang Cheng...

Oh no!

Wei Ying sat up and immediately regretted it. The pounding in his head was astronomical and he clutched it tightly, hoping the pain would go away.

Luckily the charger was right there, and he managed to stand up finally to plug it in.

Straight away, the notifications chimed, a constant stream of more noise.

Jiang Cheng was frightening when he wanted to be...and Wei Ying felt bad enough not to want to delay talking to him any more.

He rang his brother, trying not to think about the three hundred plus messages.

"Hello?" He said. Even that small word had the power to incapacitate his head.

"Asshole."

"I'm sorry." Wei Ying mumbled.

"Not good enough. Do you know how much you worried A-Jie?" The fact that Jiang Cheng was deadly serious and wasn't swearing in between, said too much.

"I...didn't I message her? Or you?" Wei Ying felt incredibly confused.

"Have you looked at your phone?"

God...he must be really pissed to sound that calm.

"I'm not...Jiang Cheng...I'm in a bad way..." Wei Ying choked back a sob.

Maybe it was the sound of his voice...maybe it was the fact that they always relied on each other...that bond was something else.

Jiang Cheng was silent...listening to him cry.

"We're on the next flight out of here, but Lan WangJi already left. He's coming for you. Um...I should apologise though..." He was saying.

"What? Why?" Wei Ying was having trouble understanding him. "Jiang Cheng...wait..." He sat up straighter, willing his mind to cooperate. "Did you say Lan Zhan was coming here? Like, here, here? My place?"

"Yes, Idiot. Look what you sent him."

"No...no...NO! I didn't send him anything...I can't have!" Wei Ying was so flustered he nearly dropped his phone. He squinted at the screen and scrolled to messages...it was right there.

Lan Zhan’s name was right at the top.

"Jiang Cheng? Why is he coming here? What about Mianmian?" Wei Ying remembered her suddenly too. "I think I'm gonna be sick, hold on."

He eased himself up as fast as he could and made his way to the bathroom. He emptied out his stomach in the most undignified way, and it was a good twenty minutes later that he was able to call him back. The mouthwash had helped in some way to make him feel partially human again.

"Jiang Cheng?"

"Asshole."

"I said I was sorry."

"And you think that makes it better?"

"No...I know it doesn't...but tell me about Mianmian...why isn't he with her? They had an announcement..."

"If you had waited...anyway, isn't he there by now?"

"What?"

The loud banging on his door made him drop his phone.

***********

When Mianmian had first approached him, Lan Zhan was surprised but supportive of her idea to congratulate Wei Ying on his organisation skills, because it was only because of that and his leadership in management that their team won.

She had also discovered that it was Wei Ying's birthday on the Monday and did Lan Zhan want to help her plan something?

Of course he did.

So they all decided to take Wei Ying out for Karaoke...only something was wrong.

Wei Ying had been acting weird since Friday and Lan Zhan was worried about him. So their announcement at the Karaoke thing was supposed to make him feel better...except...when they thanked him and raised a toast in his honour, they looked to where he should have been sitting...but Wei Ying had gone.

Lan Zhan had raced outside the Karaoke room, asking the attendant if he had seen a good looking man dressed in red and black leave, and he was relieved when the man replied in an affirmative.

Lan Zhan thought Wei Ying was upstairs in their room - he had been drinking like a thirsty horse in the desert, surely he would have to sleep it off?

He had taken the stairs two at a time in his impatience to reach their place...but he knew as soon as he had stepped inside the room, that Wei Ying was not there.

Not just a feeling but...

His suitcase was missing...along with every single indication that he was ever there.

The room felt deathly quiet and unnaturally empty.

Lan Zhan looked at their beds...he remembered that first day when a bright eyed Wei Ying had offered him painkillers and it had taken all of his self control not to take the enthusiastic man right there and kiss his full lips...the temptation was real.

Why had he pushed him away?

Lan Zhan had seen the hurt in his silver eyes and hated himself, but had Wei Ying remained there, trapped between his legs for a second longer, Lan Zhan would not have been responsible for his actions.

It was safer for Wei Ying...he had told himself.

But was it really?

Where was Wei Ying now?

Jiang WanYin had tried to warn him that night, that he and Mianmian were taking the surprise thing too far...but he hadn’t listened.

All of this was his fault...and Wei Ying was hurting because of his mistake.

Lan Zhan put himself in Wei Ying's shoes...what would Wei Ying do?

And immediately, he knew.

Wei Ying had returned home.

From then on, he knew exactly what he had to do.

Lan Zhan threw his clothes in his suitcase, for once not caring enough to fold them. He asked to be checked out earlier and while they processed his request, he rang Wei Ying's sister and brother, telling them what had happened. Jiang YanLi was more accepting but she told him to go find her brother and make everything alright again, but Jiang Cheng...?

He was livid.

"I swear to God, if anything has happened to my brother, I'll come after you."

If anything had happened to Wei Ying, Lan Zhan was pretty sure he would let him.

The frantic race to Changi airport was fraught with delay after delay.

Some accident had nose to tail traffic jams in both directions and by the time Lan Zhan got to his terminal, the only flight he was able to catch was leaving four hours later.

But he didn't care.

He had to see Wei Ying as soon as possible.

And then, his phone had pinged. Just as he had gotten on the plane.

He had enough time to send Jiang Cheng a screenshot of the first few messages, to assure him that Wei Ying was safe...but everything after that...it was private, only for them.

Lan Zhan was shocked at first. He couldn’t believe it.

And now it was more important than ever that he reach Wei Ying now.

But the Powers That Be had other plans.

Stupid delays meant he only reached Wei Ying's apartment in the early hours of Monday morning but he had seen something as he was leaving the airport and decided to buy it on a whim.

And now, here he was asleep outside a frustratingly closed door, sleeping on an oversized stuffed bunny...waiting for Wei Ying...

He jolted awake when he heard crying.

His heart broke at the sound.

Lan Zhan thought it was close too, but he couldn't be sure...and then, it didn't matter.

Wei Ying was awake and Lan Zhan was going to see him.

He stood up and knocked loudly on the door.

"Wei Ying! Open up!"

*************

Wei Ying stared at his door.

What should he do now?

His mind was a train wreck of confusing thoughts, crashing into each other like a pile up of cars on the freeway.

Lan Zhan was outside...

Lan Zhan was outside his door, and Wei Ying really wanted to see him...but common sense and self preservation said no.

No.

No more pain, no more hurting.

This had to end now.

And Wei Ying had to be strong.

He went up to his door, leaning on the cold wood to give his forehead some relief.

"Lan Zhan..."

The knocking stopped immediately.

"Wei Ying?"

"I'm here." He whispered. He hated the way his voice sounded so weak.

"Open the door. Let me see you. Please."

"Lan Zhan...I can't. I can't do this any more..." Wei Ying stifled a sob, biting his lip to stop more of them leaving his mouth.

"Please...all of this...it's my fault. I never meant for you to feel this way...I'm sorry and I love you....please...open this door..." He sounded so wretched...

Wei Ying was throwing back the bolts before he could register anything...and then the door was open...

He stumbled back but Lan Zhan caught him, holding him fast. His strong arms wrapped around Wei Ying like a vice.

Wei Ying was too overcome with everything...but he knew this was wrong. Lan Zhan had said...he had said...

He tried to pull away but Lan Zhan wouldn't let him go.

There was something wet trickling down his neck...

Was Lan Zhan...why was Lan Zhan crying?

"Lan Zhan...why....why are you crying?" Tears came into his own eyes then, the thought of this beautiful man suffering like this.

"Wait...let me hold you."

"I...Lan Zhan, we can't! What about Mianmian?" Wei Ying dashed away his tears.

Out of the two of them, one of them had to be stronger.

"What about her?" Lan Zhan sounded confused.

"What do you mean, what about her?? You kissed her! And now you're here?" Wei Ying couldn’t stop his anger from coming out. "I may be many things, but a cheater I am not!"

"What are you talking about?" Lan Zhan ran a hand through his hair, finally letting go of him. "I never kissed Mianmian! Why would I? I only want to kiss you!"

Wei Ying had never seen him look so agitated before.

Lan Zhan was always so put together, impeccably dressed, not a hair out of place.

But this one, this Lan Zhan looked tormented...and did he just say...?

"What do you mean? Lan Zhan...please...don't play games with me...I can't...I can't do this..."

"I would never play games. Not about this. Hold on." Lan Zhan pulled out his phone and quickly typed something into it.

Seconds later, Wei Ying's phone pinged.

"Look at your phone." Lan Zhan commanded, fixing him in a golden stare.

It had clattered to the floor when Lan Zhan had pounced, and now Wei Ying was picking it up. There was a message from Jiang Cheng.

He almost dismissed it...but the look on Lan Zhan’s face made him rethink that thought.

"Why..." his voice faded away as pictures popped up on his messages, his chat with Jiang Cheng...why was his brother in a liplock with Mianmian?

There was more...more pictures of Mianmian kissing his brother's cheek, Jiang Cheng looking like he just won the lottery, kissing her cheek...

Wei Ying looked up.

Lan Zhan had snuck up on him, like those cat videos.

"Jiang Cheng...and Mianmian?" Wei Ying asked in a small voice.

Lan Zhan nodded, stepping closer.

For the first time, there was hope in his eyes.

"Mianmian and Jiang Cheng?" Wei Ying whispered.

His phone pinged with another message: "Yes, Idiot. Mianmian and I are officially dating. Believe it."

Jiang Cheng was some kind of mind reader or this was a terrible joke...

His eyes filled with tears again and this time, it was Lan Zhan who wiped them away.

"It's you, Wei Ying. It's always been you. It will always be you." Lan Zhan lifted his face, staring into silver starlight eyes filled with burgeoning hope.

He angled his face and their lips met in the sweetest first kiss.

Wei Ying melted against him, his legs now jelly-like and unable to support him, but he threw himself into this kiss. His arms wrapped around Lan Zhan’s neck, pressing their lips together.

Lan Zhan moved his hands to hold Wei Ying's too-slim waist, pulling him so much closer so they were aligned. Hearts beating faster as Lan Zhan gave in to the extraordinary hunger that seemed to come alive whenever Wei Ying was close. That intoxicating scent of lotus flowers and Wei Ying...this beautiful man was kissing him back with the same passion, the same fierce wanting.

Finally, finally Wei Ying was in his arms...

Wei Ying tasted salty tears and pulled away, confused.

"Lan Zhan...?"

Those lovely golden eyes were brimming with water, flowing down those pale cheeks, and this time, it was Wei Ying who used his sleeves to wipe them away.

"Here. Come here and sit down." Wei Ying took his hand and led him to the couch. He pushed down on Lan Zhan’s shoulder, so he sat down, but when Wei Ying went to move away, Lan Zhan grabbed his waist again and buried his face there, holding him tightly.

"Lan Zhan...I'm only going to get you some water. Okay, sweetheart?" He bent down to kiss the top of his head.

There was still a lot of healing to be done for both of them...too much to talk about, and Wei Ying was already feeling like sandpaper. Water would make them both feel better.

Lan Zhan reluctantly let him go.

When Wei Ying came back, he saw Lan Zhan eyeing the bottles of vodka. He pushed the glass into his hand and removed all evidence of his meltdown, storing away both bottles of alcohol where they could not be seen in a cabinet.

He went to sit down next to Lan Zhan, who dutifully put down the glass on the table, lifted Wei Ying to sit on his lap with a yelp, and then held the glass he had just drunk from, to Wei Ying's lips.

The water tasted delicious.

Wei Ying felt suddenly shy, but this was important.

"Did you mean it?" He asked Lan Zhan, feeling uncertainty again.

"Yes. Did you?" Lan Zhan lifted his face so Wei Ying could look into his eyes and see the truth. He knew exactly what Wei Ying was talking about.

"Did I what?"

Lan Zhan searched those silver eyes, and saw nothing but sincerity. So he gave him a quick peck on his beautiful lips, and pulled out his phone again. He opened their chats and showed Wei Ying his message:

WY: Lan Zhan I love you.

WY: But if you want someone else...

WY: dropped phone...

WY: I don't want to love you

WY: Not any more...

Wei Ying mewled and covered his face.

"I can't believe...oh my god..."

Lan Zhan took hold of his wrists and kissed the back of Wei Ying's hands.

"You said it first."

"I was drunk." One silver eye peeked out between his fingers.

"Even that, if sincere, is just as valid." Lan Zhan quoted himself, his golden eyes earnestly wanting Wei Ying to understand. "And I intend to woo Wei Ying. Seriously." He smiled as Wei Ying buried his face in Lan Zhan’s neck, whining.

"For me, it has only been Wei Ying." His lips found Wei Ying's temple and he kissed the warm skin. "It is only Wei Ying, and it will always be only Wei Ying." He promised.

Wei Ying listened to him, listened to those words softly spoken with love and felt his heart slowly mend. Like the soft whispering wind among the bamboo leaves in a forest, his lips found the smooth pale skin of Lan Zhan’s neck, and he kissed him there, feeling a shudder rippling through this amazing man, reverberating into him. His lips travelled up and along his jaw, while his mind finally let him believe that Lan was here for him, and only him.

That Wei Ying could love him, and that it was right.

His lips continued their dance until they found each other. This kiss was powerful because of their realisation, that they both loved each other now. Soft kisses, gentle kisses turned eagerness into a hungry devouring and Wei Ying was on his back, the full weight of Lan Zhan’s hard body pinning him to the couch.

And all the while, they kissed and kissed and kissed.

*********

Wei Ying must have fallen asleep because when he woke up, Lan Zhan was sleeping next to him and they were both covered in a blanket.

A wave of tenderness enveloped him, as he thought of what Lan Zhan must have gone through...when he must have arrived in the early hours. He kissed his cheek softly and golden eyes snapped open.

Intense with love and desire, his hand came up to hold Wei Ying's face and then Lan Zhan kissed him again.

Wild, joyous tingles broke out all over his body, and Wei Ying moaned into this kiss, gasping for his next breath, but Lan Zhan let his lips wander over his collarbone and then he bit down hard, soothing with a swipe of his hot tongue.

Wei Ying was feeling giddy with love.

"I can't believe you're here." He whispered, and tears rose in his eyes. "With me."

"I love you, Wei Ying. I will spend the rest of my life proving it to you."

Lan Zhan kissed away his tears.

"Please don't cry any more...it hurts."

"I'm trying not to...I love you too. So much. It nearly killed me...the thought that I was going to have to walk away." He admitted.

"Is that why you were drinking?" Lan Zhan asked him, but there was no judgement in his voice, he was simply asking.

Wei Ying nodded.

"Let's make a promise to each other right now."

"Anything." Lan Zhan kissed him again.

"I promise to tell you if I'm scared of anything, if I think wrong thoughts about you. Any worry." Wei Ying stared deeply into his golden eyes, and his hands came up to hold his dear face closer.

Lan Zhan repeated his words, but after each one, he kissed Wei Ying's lips with a reverence, showing him how sincere he was. And then he added his own vows.

"I promise to love you every day, with all of my heart. It must be you, only you, I love Wei Ying."

"I fancy you, it must be only you, only my Lan Zhan." Wei Ying kissed him back.

When they parted, his eyes drifted to the side and he gasped.

"What's that?"

Lan Zhan followed his gaze, and his ears reddened. He his his face in Wei Ying's neck.

"Happy birthday, Wei Ying."

Wei Ying stroked his hair, silently screaming that he was allowed to, and hugging him tightly.

"If it's my birthday...I can have whatever I want...right?" He mused.

Lan Zhan looked up, his golden eyes narrowing. "Yes...?"

"Then I wanna see what it is!" Wei Ying quickly kissed those pouting lips and jumped up, throwing the blanket off them both, and ran to the fluffy white thing on the floor.

"It's a rabbit!" He crowed, hugging it, and doing a little dance.

Lan Zhan smiled, but the longer Wei Ying held it, the bigger his pout became.

Wei Ying carefully put it down and went and sat down in his lap. He shivered when big palms fitted themselves to his back.

Lan Zhan still wasn't looking at him.

"Lan Zhan...?" Wei Ying smiled as the pink ears darkened. His words were having an effect.

"Lan WangJi?"

"A-Zhan?"

"Lan Er-Gege?"

That was it.

Wei Ying ended up flat on his back giggling with laughter and Lan Zhan pounced for real.

********

Dinner was pizza and Pepsi followed by chocolate.

Their day was spent  learning more about each other.

"When did you know?" Lan Zhan asked him.

"I think I always knew you were special...but it was..." Wei Ying blushed hard, and of course, Lan Zhan was curious.

"Tell me."

They were lying in bed now.

"No...I can't...it's too embarrassing!" Wei Ying covered his face.

Warm fingers slid under his t-shirt and even before they had reached his ribs, Wei Ying was giggling uncontrollably.

Lan Zhan thought it was the most beautiful sound. And he wanted to hear it more.

"Mercy, mercy!" Wei Ying cried out, tears of joy falling from his beautiful silver eyes.

And so of course, Lan Zhan had to kiss him senseless again and again.

"Tell me." He said again.

"Okay." Wei Ying closed his eyes. His fingers found Lan Zhan's forearms and he tapped them. "I cannot resist...the first time I saw these, I knew there was no one else for me."

"My arms?" Lan Zhan asked incredulously.

Wei Ying sat up and took his arm into his hands.

His fingers lovingly traced the golden skin, the vein that twitched as he caressed the soft pulse and he lifted it to his mouth. His warm lips kissed the budding skin, watching the way those golden eyes darkened into molten heat. And then his pink tongue came out to join in, and it was all over for both of them.

Lan Zhan attacked him, clothes ripped off in a single movement and Wei Ying was ravaged as Lan Zhan scorched him with fiery kisses.

Afterwards, both of them panting and breathless, Lan Zhan kissed his sweaty forehead.

"I agree. My arms are only for Wei Ying."

THE END.

*******

A/N

My dear lovely Readers,

I hope this makes up for all the trauma I put you through...

And chocolate does make all the difference...I can't believe we're comparing sizes medicstories and I've already had my 45g of Whittaker's Golden Almond milk chocolate bar...

Have a great day, and smile because we are alive!

See you later, beautiful people,

Charlie.