nineteen
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two days after the fiasco at lunchtime, draco wasn't in the greenhouse.

it was an unusual occurrence, and upon arriving at the greenhouse, anxiety bloomed in harry's stomach. his mind started racing, but with a hard swallow and a few deep breaths, he buried the irrational knot in a far corner of his mind.

i guess he had more luck sleeping than i did. he thought, forcing himself to leave the topic behind and head back inside.

harry's anxiety levels have been high lately because of draco. after the incident earlier that week, the blond has been...different. it seemed like he was in a sort of daze. his eyes seemed far away, he gave half-hearted answers to any attempts at conversation, and his smiles were rare and never reached his eyes. when they saw each other in the greenhouse at night, draco barely said anything and let harry do most of the talking.

what might've been the most alarming thing, though, was draco's lack of passion. he still made flower crowns, but his hands moved much more slowly, and he occasionally stopped, body going limp as if the small movements had stolen the last of his energy.

and his eyes.

normally they lit up when he talked about flowers or potions, but now they just looked sad. it was as if– somewhere deep down– he recognized that they should make him happy, but he couldn't bring himself to feel anything remotely close to joy.

harry couldn't help but feel like it was somewhat his fault.

like if he could just find the right words, then draco would go back to normal.

he just wished draco's eyes didn't look so empty.

harry hated seeing the blond sad, but right now he preferred that to this blankness that had taken over him.

because at least then he could do something. he had no idea how to help him when he was like this. he didn't know if he needed comfort, if he needed space, he didn't know.

but he couldn't just do nothing. it had only been two days, but it was tearing harry apart.

because he felt so useless.

draco needed him, and he was too stupid to figure out how to help.

before he knew it, his eyes began to sting, a familiar soreness building in his throat. he could feel his heart aching with the weight of his thoughts.

harry had been too deep in his thoughts to realize how far he'd walked, and looked up to find himself in a cold, dusty part of the castle, thick with the scent of soiled water and damp with moisture.

soft sniffles cut through the thick silence of the hallways, growing louder as he approached the girl's  bathroom. harry's brow furrowed in concern–who would be crying in the bathroom this early in the morning?– when he realized.

this was moaning myrtle's bathroom.

he tried to remember the last time he'd talked to her. definitely not since the war ended, and not for months before that.

she must've been so lonely.

the ghosts of the castle had seen as much of the war as he had, and he wondered how it affected them.

stopping himself from getting too far into his thoughts again, he paused in front of the door.

he remembered what myrtle was like, and it occurred to him that she'd probably be angry with him.

despite that, he pushed through into the bathroom on the other side.

upon hearing the door creak open, myrtle let out a gasp of surprise, not expecting anyone to be roaming the halls this late– and definitely not coming to see her.

once her eyes locked on harry though, a strange expression bloomed on her face. it was like she was caught between smiling and crying.

"is that harry potter i see?" she squealed, floating up close to his face.

"er...hi."

"i thought you'd forgotten about me."

surprisingly, the misty eyed ghost didn't launch into a long, exhausting rant of self deprecation and faint anger after staring the fact. she seemed to sense the fatigue in his wandering gaze, and seemed to understand his skittish behaviors. she simply hovered before him, transparent cheeks glimmering softly with the remains of tears, and a pleased smile on her lips.

"sorry myrtle," he murmured, stepping further into the dim bathroom and closing the door behind him. "i got side tracked."

"yes, well i guess that's reasonable," myrtle hummed, shockingly rational. "i heard your life as the savior of the wizarding world has got you quite distracted."

harry almost felt like he should be wary. he'd never seen myrtle so relaxed in the presence of another person, especially not him. yet, there seemed to be something different about her aura of sadness tonight. usually, the haze of salty misery around her felt light and almost insubstantial as it swallowed her figure. but this time, there was a tangle sorrow in her pinched face, an actual heaviness to her shoulders.

he somehow knew that she had something on her mind tonight, and that it was probably the reason for her lack of dramatics.

"you seem distracted yourself," he ventured, biting gently on his bottom lip. "is there...something wrong?"

myrtle grinned with a hint of giddiness despite her sadness. a tiny giggle bubbles on her lips.

"oh you noticed!" she squealed. "yes, i do have something i'm thinking about. i heard you've been spending all your time with the slytherin prince. your rival. draco malfoy."

harry hated himself for blushing. "who-who told you that?"

the buzzing flush on his cheeks turned his words cloudy and staticky, and myrtle laughed again, a bolder cackle this time.

"i live in a girls bathroom harry. girls gossip. especially when the golden boy gets himself involved with a former deatheater."

"he wasn't a deatheater-"

"i know he wasn't," myrtle interrupted, waving away the slight flare of irritation in harry's stance with a knowing smirk. "you may have forgotten, but i told you, draco used to come here all the time. when you-know-who assigned him that task in your 6th year? oh, he was so miserable, and it was such a sad thing to see. he has such a pretty face—though i'm sure you know that—and it was always sickly pale and covered in tears then."

harry's heart lurched.

"you made him so anxious back then," she giggled, though there was something heartbreaking in it now. "he was always ranting to me, about stupid potter and his stupid suspicions. he acted like he hated you, but sometimes i could tell he was terrified of you."

harry almost choked on his own saliva. he held his burning chest, glaring in disbelief. "terrified?" he gasped. "no he wasn't, he thought i was a stuck up twat—"

"well, yes he did, but he was also jealous of you. and scared of you. you had the power to ruin him and his family, and all the reasons in the world to do it. it's probably why he attacked you first when you found him here sobbing. he was so frightened and so ill then, he just—"

myrtle's voice broke, and harry gasped at her. he'd had no idea they were so close. even when myrtle had told him of their friendship back then, he never would have guessed that their relationship held so much trust. so much affection.

"draco was just a boy you know," she sighed, and some foggy light grew behind her eyes. "he still is."

harry's gaze softened. "i know."

he thought of draco, pretty and shining ivory under the moon's soft kisses. gentle, flushed fingers brushing across the petals of a flower, pink lips pouted, eyes glimmering jewels melted around the edges of his eyes. looking so tired, too thin, and smiling a tragic smile that broke harry's heart.

he had changed a lot since then, but one thing remained the same.

he was too young. too young for all the pain he'd suffered and all the pain he was still suffering.

myrtle shrugged, clearly trying to lighten her mood. "anyway, i heard about what happened in the great hall. he hasn't visited in so long, and i'd hoped he was doing better, but after hearing what they did to him, i...well, i was worried. how convenient that his knight in shining armor should visit me tonight."

the blush returned in full force, sending heat skittering over the surface of his skin.

"he's—he's not very good," he managed to splutter. he wrapped himself up in his arms, resisting the urge to fan himself. "he's been sad and out of it ever since. and he was supposed to meet me tonight but...he didn't show up."

"oh no," myrtle murmured. her voice already sounded more choked up, like she was burying oncoming sobs beneath the words. "that's not good, not good at all. you must—you must check on him tomorrow, as soon as you can. make sure he's not starving himself."

"i—i will." harry promises shakily, watching in silent horror as tears pushed themselves past the rim of myrtle's glasses, staining her gray skin.

"he was such a good listener!" she sobbed, and harry flapped his hands about, unsure of how to comfort the distraught ghost. "and he called me by my real name, and he actually seemed to like talking to me!"

"myrtle, don't cry!" harry exclaimed, panicked. "i'll...i'll make sure he comes to visit you soon! i know he didn't mean to stop visiting you...i'll tell him to come back and to see you!"

"you..." myrtle cried, rubbing at her watery eyes with lightly curled hands. "you would do that for me?"

harry laughed awkwardly. "of course i would! so please, don't cry..."

"you have to promise to come back with draco." she wailed, a scowl twisting her sour mouth.

he nodded furiously. "i promise, i promise!"

he was so very relieved when her sobs began to dwindle down to mere whimpers and sniffles.

it was a while before she was able to speak coherently again, and harry decided to stay with her. he thought it would be awfully rude to leave while she was still crying, especially when she was crying about a boy he cared very much about. besides, myrtle seemed like she wasn't quite in the prying mood tonight. maybe they could have a decent conversation.

"so...are you draco's boyfriend now?"

harry regretted his entire existence.

a/n: hi hi hi hi!!!

did you like it? please comment telling me how you feel, or if anything can be improved.

i know it's been a really long time, and i'm so so so sorry about that. i had a lack of motivation for this chapter and myrtle's character is hard to write, please understand.

i've been trying to write faster so i can get more chapters out but i've been a bit busy. i planned a few chapters ahead so hopefully i can get those out as soon as possible for you guys because you are wonderful readers and i feel like i haven't been the best author.

feedback and constructed criticism are very much appreciated, as well as anything you'd like to see included in the story.

love you! (*'∀'*)