I felt like all the oxygen in the room was being sucked out. This wasn't good at all. We were already not on good terms. Krystal you oblivious girl.

This is just my luck.

I sat in silence, looking at Minho. Onew, Amber, Krystal and Jonghyun were the only ones who seemed amused. They were just smiling, expecting for me or Minho to make a move. Kimbum just shook his head looking at his brother with a grin. Out of all of us, he looked like he had not even touched a single can of beer or alcohol.

"Hurry up tigers, we ain't got all night!" Krystal slurred grinning and letting her head fall on Amber's shoulder.

I looked at him, without directly looking into his eyes. He gave an unreadable look at Krystal and sighed. He grabbed one of the cans of beers in front of him and took multiple gulps.

"Let's get this over with.." he mumbled loudly enough for me to hear as he stood up. The others also seemed to have heard as they began cooing. He sighed and walked away towards what I believe was a closet without sparing me a glance, under the others stares and wolf whistle.

"Ooh, it's about to be steamy in there" Jonghyun grinned giving me a creepy look which I ignored.

"Hot, hot like fire" Amber joined in.

I looked at Key who only stared back sadly.

"Make it right, hwaiting!" he mouthed unnoticed.

I inhaled and followed behind.

A wooden door was opened and I could guess it was a closet. I went in to find Minho already sitting in the corner, his long legs folded. I go in and sit across from him closing the door behind. We sat in silence. I was looking at the ground, honestly too afraid to see his expression which either showed anger or disgust. And both could break me. I took a deep breath and opened my mouth to speak. I had to say something since he wasn't. I had to apologize or something.

"Minho i-"

"I heard she's pregnant..." he cuts me off, his voice coming out deep and strong sending chills throughout my whole body. I take a deep breath and grab the courage to look at him. He looked mad alright. I could see hurt in his eyes but the anger was obviously showing. And it was all my fault.

"Who..Who told you?" i ask carefully.

He chuckles. One of those 'are you seriously asking me this' chuckles.

"You guys are still children of rich business people Taemin. My parents have connections in that field and apparently the news is spreading. I heard about it a few days after our first date, after you left me... "

"I didn't leave you... "

"I beg to differ."

"Minho..."

"Honestly were you ever going to tell me? I mean, do you know how dumb i feel right now? You were the first guy i ever...I actually had the courage to confess to you and i was ready to be openly in love with you yet you just..."

He sighs and ruffles his hair with one hand. All I want to do is touch his nicely conditioned hair as he lays his head down on my lap-

"You basically lied to me Tae..for weeks."

Him calling me Tae triggered something in me. It was strange, hearing it from his mouth after so long. It just made me realize how much I needed him.

"Minho, I'll leave her." I meant these words. It was sad, but i did. I didn't know what else to say. It's just that his words sounded like he would leave me forever. And i wanted to hang on to him, with all i had.

"You'll leave her? Taemin it's not just you, her or even me now. She's having a child." he frowns, looking at me as if i were crazy.

"You can't just leave her and the child, that's not how life works Taemin. You can't just pick and choose which life you want." Minho scoffs.

Why does he have to be right? Why does he always make sense and make me sound so...

"Well fuck Minho, what do you want me to do?"

"Act like an adult Taemin. Shit, you should have just told me ahead of time."

"Tell you? What would've happened then? You would have left me wouldn't you? Looked at me with disgust like you are doing right now, don't you think?"

"Taemin-"

"I love you for goodness sakes and I just want to fucking be with you I'm tired of lying and you freed me from my lies and now it's like I went ten steps backwards. You're just- Ugh!"

I storm out the closet before he could see the tears on my cheeks. I pass by the few people who had hid behind the door listening and head out Minho's house. I head to Key's car and sit in there. Gathering my thoughts together.

Obviously i was wrong. I wouldn't admit it to him. I won't. I barely want to admit it to myself but yes, i was wrong. I didn't think about anybody but myself. I didn't think about the consequences. It was all about me and wanting to be happy. I thought about nobody else. Not Minho, not Makise, not my mother or even my friends.

Knock.Knock.Knock.

I look up teary eyed and look around, i look out my window seeing someone standing there. I wipe my eyes since i was seeing blurry and recognize Minho.

"Minho?" I mumble.

"Can...Can i get in?" I hear.

I nod and unlock the doors of the car. Minho goes around the car and gets in the passenger sit.

"Hey.."

"...Hey." I sniffle and wipe my nose using my jacket sleeve.

"Sorry for sounding harsh earlier...I just..." Minho sighs. Not saying anything. I nod. I understood what he was trying to get at.

"You were hurt...And should be angry. Even i can get that." i smile softly. It's true that when it came to such deep feelings i've always treated others without consideration. Like what i had done to Minho and Makise.

"Look...." he begins looking at me. I nervously look back at him as he continues. "I'm not going to lie. I'm hurt and angry and not just at you, but at myself too i guess...And..What i'm saying is I'll be your friend Taemin. But that's it...I won't be the one to come in between you and your wife for my own selfish reasons...I'm sorry if i confused you, or maybe even pressured you. I'll back away and try to act as natural as possible till, whatever this is, burns out and we can hang out normally again. Can we do that?"

I look away from him. Not exactly sure how i should feel, i stare out of the window silently. I open my mouth, not even sure what i'm suppose to respond to that, and look at him. He looked determined, yet unsure, or was it hope? Okay, he wasn't telling me he didn't want to have anything to do with me anymore but, wasn't that what backing away meant? So does he want us to avoid each other till what? Our feelings go away? Will that even happen?

I don't want friendship is what i wanted to say. Fuck that shit, i don't want it..But was me wanting to be more than his friend worth losing him entirely? No. But maybe having him out of my life could help me be a good father and husband...But i wanted him still. Near somehow. Just to see his bright goofy smile and hear his heart-throbbing voice.

It takes everything in me. Literally everything in me to look at this man and smile.

"Fine." I breath out.

"R-Really?" he smiles brightly making me want to break out in tears again.

"Yes. Now please get out, thanks." The words came out more bitterly then i expected, but he did it. How dare he smile at me like that.

I look at him as he looks back at me still smiling. I frown and his smile fades.

"Oh, um, okay then..Uh..Bye." he gets out the car and closes the door. I don't wait another second because i would probably do something stupid like getting out my car and run to him so i could hug him. I sigh and get out of the car walking to the nearest bus stop.

The first person that came to mind was Eunbi.

_____

I sigh looking at the door in front of me. Appartment 65. It's been awhile. Damn was I pathetic. I should've texted her, but oh well.

I knock on the door softly. After a few seconds of no answer i knock again. She should be awake at this time, she always is on weekends. I then hear her voice, not exactly sure what she was saying i knock again and the door opens immediately.

"Oh it's yooooou Taemin. " Eunbi basically squeals as she sees me. I smile awkwardly but soon frown looking at Eunbi's appearance. Her hair was a mess, she seemed to have trouble seeing as she squinted her eyes and her comfortable clothes seemed tarnished with spots of wine.

"Eunbi what...?" I wasn't exactly sure what to ask.

"Oh, come in, come in. I have soooo much to tell you baby." she chuckles and pulls me inside her apartment, closing the door so loud i slightly jumped as i began taking off my shoes.

"Let's go into the living room, i'll go make you some tea." she continues talking at the speed of light pushing me towards the living room while i was still taking one of my shoes off.

"Eunbi- what the hell?" my eyes grow wide as i look at the white substance on her table. I was confused, but not stupid.

"Well, you've caught me white handed! Get it, white." she laughs an almost evil sounding laugh. "Take a seat, you can take some too it's some rich shit." she winks and walks to the kitchen giggling.

"Uh..Ok..." I slowly walk to the couch and take a sit. I stare down at the spread cocaine as if it could attack me, i was interested but i knew better.

"Here!" she comes in with two cups of tea. I wonder how she could even make the tea when her hands seemed to tremble violently as she placed the cups on the table.

"Thanks..." i grab the cup and sip on it slightly. I look at her while placing the cup back down. She was looking at me with a big grin. A creepy one that seemed to anticipate my response.

"It's good..."

She smiles brightly. "Good."

And then lowers her head to the table inhaling in the white powder. I frown and look at the little bit of white powder just under her nose as she lifts up her head.

"Want some?" she questions.

"I...No, thanks." I reject the offer although honestly i didn't really care about morals at the moment.

"Mmm..." She hums while nodding her head.

"Eunbi..Why are you..." i watch her lower her head to the table again, taking a whole line in.

"What happened?"

"Ah, Taemin." she chuckles wiping her nose. "People are dying. Mothers are burying their kids. Our country is most likely to fall into dept and...So much is happening Taemin."

I nod, although i knew she definitely wasn't doing cocaine because of that.

"That's what i wish was my honest answer." she chuckles bitterly. "Doing cocaine because the world is a mess would make me more dignified then my real reason. I could have done weed but i don't know anyone who sells it and my dear co-worker only knew a person that sold crack so now I'm doing fucking crack which i always said was for idiots." she laughs but tears start to stream down her face.

"He's getting married Taemin." she directly looks at me. Her voice as equally cold as her face, giving me goosebumps.

"He..You mean..?"

She nods and giggles.

"Yeah. The love of my life whom i let go of. That he." she begins to bring her nose close to the table again but i place my hand in between her and the white powder. Her eyes meet mine immediately.

"If you had weed, maybe i would do it with you, but you're doing cocaine and i think it's not fair not to share in front of guests."

She rolls her eyes and lifts her head back up slowly. The corners of her lips curl up and she breaks out in laughter.

"You bastard."

I grin and broom the white powder into my hand and walk to wipe it into the trash. I spend at least three more hours there; Listening to her broken heart. How she wished she had told him everything, and how it was too late now.

-----

Author Note: I wish I had put more of Eunbi.. Like she has this mature yet broken personality? Kind of like daisy from the Great Gasby