"Look who it is." A familiar Belgium man nudged his wife in the busy hotel lobby that doubled as a tour agency and gift shop.

Marcela turned around in the elbow-to-elbow crowd threatening to knock over snow globes and polar-bear-themed beer steins. With unrivalled enthusiasm, she grinned at us.

"What are the odds we meet again in such a bustling metropolitan centre?"

We all laughed, given that you could walk from one end of the main street to the other in about five minutes.

"Caleb, this is Marcela and her husband, Yannick, the lovely couple I met on the train."

Caleb extended his hand for a handshake and offered them a genuine smile. "Wonderful to meet you both. Audrey has nothing but kind things to say about you."

"Likewise, we heard you make quite the soft landing pad for agitated travellers," Yannick said.

My face warmed, as that part of the story had slipped out when I told it, much to their amusement.

"Audrey's hardly agitated, overwhelmed perhaps by the challenges of poorly designed luggage storage, but I can't fault it as this trip wouldn't be so incredible without her."

Marcela turned to me. "He is a bit of a charmer, isn't he? But are you sure he's the one you want to bring to the tundra? He looks quite agile and possibly athletic."

Caleb raised an eyebrow while I chuckled.

"Quite sure. He'd fight off bears for me."

Marcela looked him in the eye, not convinced. "Would you now?"

He furrowed his brow and looked between us all. "Come again?"

"If you encountered a bear while the two of you were together, would you fight it or run?" Yannick spoke as if he were offering him coffee or tea. Although his stare reminded me of a protective uncle meeting my boyfriend for the first time.

"You're not supposed to run from polar bears as they're natural hunters and may take it as an invitation to pursue. My time would be better spent alerting someone with a weapon, but if you were in danger—" His gaze darted to me. "I'd do anything I could to protect you, even if it meant fighting a bear."

That sweet look in his eye sent my heart fluttering like a leaf in the wind. Why couldn't I keep him by my side indefinitely?

Marcela laughed. "A bit of an overthinker, aren't ya? No wonder you two get along so well." She gave me a subtle nod, like she approved.

Caleb scratched at the back of his neck. "Guilty. Hopefully, we won't encounter bears up close during the town tour. We'll save them for the buggy tomorrow. Although it would be ace to see one out the window."

His words tickled my stomach, given that both polar bear sightings and I were ace in different ways. I suspected he chose it on purpose. As if to confirm it, he kissed me on the cheek and held me close, which wasn't hard to do as a person in an 80s-inspired ski jacket nudged past us. I wasn't complaining about our proximity.

No winter jacket or bonfire could beat his warmth.

Once we'd checked in for our tour, we migrated outside in front of the hotel and chatted with the older couple. The white vehicle nearby was a small school bus with lower clearance. Based on the surrounding group, we'd have about twenty others on the tour.

"Welcome to Churchill, everyone," a kindred short woman's voice broke through many conversations. "I'm Joanne, and I'll be your guide today."

The crowd turned toward the woman with her hair pulled back in a ponytail, which, given the crowd and our shared lack of height, was one of the few parts of her I could see.

"Before we leave, I'd love to share more about Churchill with you. We are on Treaty 5 territory, the traditional land of the Cree, Dene, and Inuit people, and the homeland of the Metis Nation. For those unfamiliar with treaties, these are agreements signed with Indigenous nations during colonization to share land and resources that are still in effect today and in the future. The Pre-Dorset, Dorset, and finally the Inuit have inhabited this area for over 4000 years. Tent rings and kayak stand artifacts have been found dating back to those periods."

Although their kayaks would have had different designs and been made of more natural materials thousands of years ago, it was neat to know that our next tour, kayaking with the belugas, linked to the area's past.

"The area has long been a centre of trade for the Cree, Dene, and Inuit people. If you take the Prince of Wales tour, you'll learn more about that and the more recent history."

"We are," Caleb whispered with adorably dorky enthusiasm.

I squeezed his hand to share the sentiment and thank him. Without his kindness, I was unsure how much of this place I would have explored solo beyond the whales and bear tours. Someday I planned to pay him back, be it with an epic trip or during a visit to his hometown if he'd be open to either.

"Today, this town trades a different type of good, wildlife and arctic experiences. With a population of almost 900 residents, this area has more polar bears than people. So it's important to stay vigilant when you walk around town and are on the tour. Bears can be quiet, so it's wise to stay in a group and to turn around regularly to check the area. While we've only had two fatal polar bear attacks on record here—the most recent in the 1980s—polar bears are carnivores and can see humans as a meal. If you are walking in town and see a bear or hear a siren, take shelter. People leave their cars unlocked at all times for shelter, so use them if need be."

Joanne continued explaining that she had both a 'bear banger' gun to scare the bears and a shotgun on the bus, but she assured us they were only for wildlife emergencies. If we encountered a bear, we should back away slowly, keep it in sight without looking it in the eye, and act non-threatening. However, if it did attack, we had to fight back and aim for sensitive areas like the nose and face.

"Is it common to see bears on the tour?" Yannick asked.

"It happens sometimes, especially once we get out of town and closer to Polar Bear Alley," Joanne said.

A murmur of excited whispers travelled through the group like the cool summer breeze.

I tensed, given that most of my experience was with black bears who were often scared of humans and usually only confronted people when threatened with their cubs or were pillaging campsites for food people left out, whereas polar bears could be risky predators all the time.

Caleb stroked my hand with his soft fingers. "We'll stick together."

Joanne's voice cut through the murmurs. "If we encounter a bear, we'll stay on the bus, and I'll give you further instructions. Chances are, if we see one, we'll be driving and perfectly safe."

Her words were a comfort, just like Caleb.

The tour took us around the town first, near storage containers painted to resemble polar bears roaming the tundra against a vibrant aurora backdrop, at which Yannick jokingly held up his fists and whispered, "Quick Caleb, aim for the eyes." Marcela shook her head while Caleb and I chuckled.

Nearby grew community gardens in the shelter of large old tires. The growing season was quite short, however, given their northern latitude, they received plenty of day light.

A group of sled dogs rested beside dog houses and were chained up next to them. Joanne said although it seemed cruel to those of us with indoor pets, the dogs' fur was far too thick to bring the animals indoors. If people did, the animals would overheat as they were adapted to this climate. It still was unfair they couldn't roam.

"Do you think those are the ones for the tour we're taking later?" I asked.

"No, I think the company is located outside the town and raise their dogs on site. They seemed to be a different breed and spent time inside, at least in the photos."

His reaction to the beluga tour came to mind, and I trust he'd researched his options well. "Lily's choice?"

He nodded. "She wanted to snuggle those dogs so badly. I can still hear her talking about it. It's... still mind-boggling that she's... that she can't..." He bit on his lip and averted his eyes to the narrow back alley near our hotel. I stroked his shoulder.

"She's my sister... she's always supposed to be... there." His eyes glistened as he took a sharp breath through his nose.

I understood that feeling well after my aunt passed. Her smiles lit up the room, and she knew what to say to diffuse the tension during family gatherings with my mom's side of the family. The finality of her absences at Christmas or summers out at the lake together still weighed on my chest years later. Each death in our family, hers and my grandparents', left a vacuum none of us could fill. It was one perk of living abroad, celebrating holidays in commercial and less meaningful ways with friends and acquaintances that kept the pain on the far shore.

"She will be Caleb. That's what the doctors said, isn't it?"

"I know... It's just... not the same, and I'm a jerk for even being bitter about it."

"No you're not." I rested my hand on his jeans. "She matters to you, and the idea of losing someone that special is bitter at the mildest. Devastatingly unfair is more accurate."

His voice grew more gravelly. "It's unfair that I'm here, and she's not."

"It is, but blaming yourself for it instead of that drunk driver won't change it. Consider it research for when she's healed enough to take this trip."

"And financially recovered enough to afford it," he muttered.

"I'll pay back my half as soon as I can." Which unfortunately wouldn't be any time soon. Not with my diving wages.

He placed his warm hand over mine. "That wasn't what I meant. I've never expected that you would."

"Do whatever you want with the money, give it to Lily or charity or keep it, but you'll get it."

"You don't have to, Audrey. I invited you here because I wanted to spend more time with you, and I might not have realized it then, but I need you here with me," he whispered.

Our hands were now intertwined like a spider web with a tree, although I was unsure which of us was the fragile silk, possibly both.

The bus pulled out of the back roads area and onto the main hotel road.

"I want to."

He kissed my hand. "Thanks. She'd really like you."

"Maybe someday we'll meet and test your theory."

His thin-lipped smile said all I needed to know about his estimations of the odds of that becoming a reality.

The lump in my throat turned to a caged animal, scratched and clawing with each breath, and I diverted my focus out the window and tuned out Joanne's information about the town. Why did I keep getting my hopes up? I wasn't enjoying this pain, but letting the promise of our future slip away was too hard. What if one time it worked?

Though it was growing harder and harder to believe.

We drove past several apartment buildings, some decorated with bright street art of polar bears and whales, which brightened my storm cloud mood a little. In a minute, we arrived at the sandy beach, nestled between two large sections of bedrock. Beside the beach sat the town centre building which held the health centre, the pre-kindergarten to grade 12 school, the library, an indoor playground, a pool, a curling rink, a hockey arena, a gym and the fitness centre and theatre. In an area with a harsh climate where polar bears could roam, it seemed like a safe choice to house it all together. Plus, building materials were tricky to come by up north.

We exited the bus, and Joanne kept us close to the road and the old restored Beluga fishing boat that now doubled as a tourist attraction on the shore. Wildflowers caught Caleb's eye, but she warned us to stay between the rocks and be vigilant, as this was polar bear country. The coast was their territory. While bears that wandered into town were sent to polar bear jail, which we'd visit later, it still occurred each year.

"Takes a bit of the fun out of nature walks, doesn't it?" Marcela said to us.

"Especially if you've been designated the 'slow' bait," Yannick ribbed, making us chuckle.

We took in the powerful waves of the Hudson Bay, rivalling some ocean swells, as they crashed onto the nearby bedrock. Spray flew into the air. The wind gusts had some strength, their chilled fingers scraping at our sweater-covered skin despite the summer month. Caleb wrapped an arm around my shoulder and stroked it gently as I tried and failed not to melt into his side.

We may not have a future, but his presence was still addictive.

"How are you enjoying Canada so far?" Marcela asked him.

"Quite well. It's a place I'd love to explore more one day."

"You've found the perfect reason to return," Yannick smiled at both of us.

A genuineness permeated his and his wife's actions like our happiness would snowball onto theirs. I wasn't sure why they were interested in us or our trip, but I appreciated it. I needed every boost I could get with the temporary nature of our relationship.

Caleb smiled at me so fondly that it was impossible to mistake his affection for passion for the flora and fauna.

"I certainly have."

Those words used to send a thrill through me, but, more and more, they unsettled my heart. They were just half-lies to keep the hurt and awkward conversations away. If Caleb still couldn't see a future for us after his sister's health was improving, there wasn't much use in hoping for more.

I remained quiet as we returned to the bus and looped around town to see the Itsanitaq museum, which housed many Inuit artifacts, and the log-cabin-style Caribou Hall. Then we headed outside the town, down the coastal road.

Caleb was intent on listening to the guide, only making brief comments to me in the interludes, but not picking up on my lack of focus or short, clipped answers. I counted it as an advantage to help get my emotions in check. Being upset with our situation wasn't fair to our relationship, as he'd been clear about our circumstances, but that didn't make it hurt any less. I wanted to matter enough to change his mind to try for anything, be it long-distance or some distant plan to reunite, but I wouldn't fault him for worrying about his sister's health. That was far more pressing than some overly emotional travel companion/girlfriend he'd picked up.

As the road rose and fell with the rocky Canadian Shield landscape, we kept our eyes on the coast for bears. The light-coloured, round rocks on the horizon drew my interest. I stared at them, my heartbeat increasing as I swore I saw movement, but it slowed as that flicker disappeared and they remained immobile and boulder-shaped. My shoulders grew heavy. A bear at a safe distance would have chased away my relationship worries, but that wasn't meant for us today, just like Caleb and I weren't destined for a lasting future.

Thank you for reading :) 

The tour continues in part 2 which will be a bit more upbeat, and hopefully posted this weekend. 

Think they'll see a bear?

Funny enough, during the time I was writing and editing these chapters, I went out for a hike, heard some loud panting and bushes rustling near the trailhead, and what pops out of the bush a short distance away but a juvenile black bear. Luckily it wandered off after looking us over, and we didn't see it again on the hike. Seems you can't write about bears and bear safety without attracting them XD