Joana

Her heart stopped when she heard the door handle turn. A smile crept up her face when she realized what it meant. 

She stood to greet the King as he entered. 

"Inoko, was it?" The way he talked, the way he moved, the way he breathed was American. He had none of the regalness that moved within Wakanda like oxygen. He was raised like Joana was. She knew him, everything about him, just by the way he spoke. 

But Joana revealed none of this. She simply nodded her head. 

"You're mute because of some sacrifice to your goddess, Bast?" He asked, walking around her in circles. Joana nodded again, fighting away the twisting feeling in her gut that so reminded her of HYDRA and the days she spent stalked and preyed upon. 

"You changed?" Joana raised an eyebrow as if to ask if he liked her outfit. "Did you change just for me?" 

The King dropped his voice and Joana's breath stopped. She knew the sound of his voice, recognized the way he breathed. Her skin itched, goosebumps covering her entire body. The King ran a finger across the scars on Joana's neck and her eyes fluttered shut. 

"You have some pretty nasty scars for being a priestess." Joana opened her eyes again and met his gaze dead on. She would not be intimidated. She had a job to do here. She would do it. "I have some scars myself, would you like to see them?" 

The King pulled off his shirt and Joana's heart seized. This had happened to her before. Not exactly this scenario, but she knew where it was heading. She told herself that she could handle it, whatever the cost. 

The King stepped toward her, chest riddled with scars. Before he even asked her to, Joana began to trace the scars with a delicate finger. She tried to seem amazed at those scars, but she knew what they meant. She had learned well enough in her time at Wakanda that scars like the ones worn by the King represented a life taken. 

"Do you know my name?" He asked her quietly as if it was somehow important. Joana met his gaze once again. The look he was giving her turned her stomach to lead. "I am N'jadaka, and I do not care what promise you gave to your goddess, by the end of this night, I will having you screaming my name so all those in the palace can hear." 

He grabbed her by the shoulders and kissed her. It wasn't a sloppy kiss like the others, but it was forceful. Joana tried her best to kiss him back, but she couldn't breathe. Her heart convulsed rapidly. She tripped over her long dress as N'jadaka pushed her backward. While she fell, she was free from his grip and she could almost breathe, but as soon as she hit the ground, he was on top of her and her breath left again. 

He was slower than the others Joana had been with. They always seemed in a rush to be somewhere after they were done with her, but N'jadaka was in no hurry. She almost preferred it the other way. It meant it was over quicker. 

Before he even began to undress her, Joana knew she wasn't going to make it. She was already hearing Aleksi and Pierce and Rumlow in her hear. She could already feel their breath on her neck, their hands on her body. She couldn't do this. She needed to end it before it began. 

N'jadaka was so busy kissing her neck that he failed to realize Joana reaching up toward the bed, where her dagger was waiting. She could just barely get her hand under the pillow. Her fingertips grazed the hilt on the dagger, but she couldn't grab it. She groaned as she reached just a tiny bit further. 

Just before she got a good grip on the dagger, the air in the room shifted. N'jadaka's hands were no longer on her body, but on her arm that was reaching for the dagger. The lust that was in his eyes was replaced with fury. 

"Who the hell are you?" He asked, throwing her away from the bed. Joana groaned as she hit the ground, but rolled and stood up, squaring off with the King. He tossed the pillow off the bed, revealing the dagger. He snatched it and turned to Joana, pointing it at her. 

"You're still loyal to your old king, aren't you?" he asked. "He's dead! I'm the king now! You have to do as I say." 

He charged at her, but Joana easily sidestepped and ducked underneath him. She spun away, searching for an advantage. 

Joana couldn't feel her fingers. Her pulse raced. Her heart pounded in her chest. Her vision began to blur at the edges as she avoided N'jadaka's attempts to kill her. He lunged at her and Joana swatted his hand away. The simple block was enough for Joana's years of training to kick in a takeover. If she couldn't find an advantage, she would create one. 

Joana raced to the large fireplace and grabbed one of the metal hot pokers. She squared off with the King once again, spinning the poker once. He charged at her with the dagger and she parried his advance, turning around him and smacking him in the back with her weapon. 

The two stalked around each other or a few more moments before Joana charged again. They fought, poker and dagger, until he got lucky and swiped her feet out from under her. He was on top of her before she could react and the fear that seemed to control her returned. The poker was useless in her hand. He had her pinned and she was helpless. 

"Who the hell are you?" He asked. 

"My name," she breathed. "Is Joana Kegley."

"You're not from Wakanda." 

"No. I am American, just like you." 

"Why do you want me dead?" 

Joana glared at him. She struggled underneath him, but he was strong. 

"That's my business," she said finally. She tried to hide how quickly her heart was beating, how hard it was to breathe. 

"Your business?" N'jadaka's laugh was cold. "I am the one you were going to kill, so how is that not my business." 

Joana groaned as she wriggled underneath him. 

"Get off of me," she ground out, her lungs constricting. 

"So you can try and kill me again? Not a chance." 

"I'm trying to protect my family," she snapped. "I need you dead so that I can protect my family. Now, get off me!" 

N'jadaka rolled off of her, still pointing his dagger at her. 

Joana turned her back to him, coughing and breathing as slowly as she could to stop the panic that brewed in her chest. 

"I know you," he said finally. Joana scoffed. "No, I know you. I know your face, but I don't see how that's possible." 

"You don't know me." 

"I really think that I do. I had a friend a while ago who introduced me to his family. I never met his grandmother because she died, but I saw a picture of her. She looked just like you." 

Joana turned around slowly. 

"What was her name?" 

"I don't remember. Something weird." 

All the fear that Joana felt was gone, replaced by something stronger. She leaped and tackled him to the ground. She disarmed him of the dagger and pointed it at his neck. 

"What was her name?" She asked slowly. N'jadaka finally saw Joana in that moment.

"My friend called her Grams, but his father called her Mama Winnie." 

Joana fell back, away from N'jadaka. 

"Winifred? Winnie?" 

"Yeah. That's it. She looked exactly like you. You know her?" 

Joana swallowed hard. She dropped her hands to the ground. Her heart was hollowed out. Her mind was blank. 

Winnie, her Winnie. 

"Winnie. She had kids?" 

"Yeah. My friend's mother was her oldest kid. There were three other kids I think."

"What were their names?" 

"Well, Stephanie was my friend's mom. We all called her Stevie." Joana let out a shaking breath. "I think there was a Becca. I remember a Robbie. And then there was Jo."

"And the man Winnie married?" 

"His name was Robert Merrick."

Joana dropped her head into her hands. 

"Who was she to you?" 

"She was my sister. My twin sister." 

N'jadaka laughed. 

"You must be old." 

Joana almost laughed. N'jadaka sighed and stood up. 

"Look, any relative of my friend is no enemy. No matter how many times she tried to kill me." He started to walk toward the door. 

"Your friend, what was his name?" Joana asked just before he left. 

"His name was Jimmy Leon. Jim Leon." N'jadaka said. "Look, I'm going to leave you in here, but I can't have you wandering around. I mean, you did try to kill me." 

Joana nodded, not moving from her place on the ground. She didn't look back at N'jadaka, even as the door closed shut. 

Joana couldn't think about Winnie. She couldn't think about Winnie marrying Robert of having four kids and naming them after her and her friends. She couldn't think about the dream she had all those years ago about her family. She couldn't think that she had a family somewhere out in the world. 

All she could think about was finding that family. 

Okoye found her the next day, sitting in the same position, eyes red from lack of sleep. Okoye watched her for a second, unsure if Joana was even breathing. When Joana finally sighed, Okoye stepped forward. 

"Joana?" 

"This room is too big for one person," Joana said. "I don't think I could live in here by myself. Our new king is going to need a queen."

Okoye knew she was walking on thin ice. She wasn't sure what had happened, but Joana was in a fragile state. 

"And who do you think should be his queen?" 

"I don't know. Someone. Anyone." 

"You?" 

Joana laughed. It was not a nice laugh. It was a bitter laugh. 

"I could never be a queen."

Okoye sat beside Joana. 

"The way I see it, we are all kings and queens in our own right. We're just...queens of ourselves." 

"A Queen of one." 

Okoye nodded. 

"N'jadaka is dead." 

Joana turned toward Okoye. She looked almost bittersweet. Joana nodded slowly. 

"But it turns out that T'challa did not perish in his duel against Killmonger. You and Barnes are safe." 

Joana let out a sigh of relief and put her head in her hands. 

The door to the room flew open. 

"Joana!" 

Joana turned. Her apathetic trance was broken at the sound of Shuri's voice. Joana pushed herself off the ground and stood as Shuri ran to embrace her. 

"What are you doing in here? Did Killmonger hurt you? Are you alright?" Shuri rambled, arms squeezing Joana's waist. She pulled away. "Why are you in this dress? It looks great on you, but-"

"I'm alright, Shuri. I am glad that your brother is home." Shuri grinned. "I have a favor to ask though." 

"Anything." 

"Can you find a man named Jimmy Leon? He was born in New York to a Stephanie Leon, maiden name Merrick. I don't want to swamp you with things, but-"

"I will find him, give me about an hour. Who is he?" 

Joana sighed. 

"I think he might be my grandnephew." 

***

"Steve?" 

"Joana, what's the update? 

"It's safe to come home. Apparently, T'challa didn't die, which is good news. His cousin who took his throne is dead. It's safe." 

"Any updates on Bucky?" 

"Not yet. Shuri was not here." Joana paused, debating whether or not she should tell Steve about Winnie. She couldn't, not until she was sure it was Winnie. "But soon. We'll get him back, Steve, don't worry." 

"I trust her, Joana." There was a little bit of arguing on the other end before Steve started talking again. "Sam wants to talk to you." 

"Joana, what the hell?" 

"Sam, listen to me-"

"No, you listen to me. You can't put your life in danger like that. You can't just throw your life away every day in hopes of saving his life. Someday you're going to get yourself killed." 

"Sam, I don't expect you to understand. For the longest time, Bucky was the only person I had in this world. I spent every day trying to protect him. All that would be a waste if I gave up now, wouldn't it?"

"But you have other people now, Jo. He's not the only one who needs you." 

"I know, Sam. I know that I have Steve and that I have Natalia and Steve and Wanda and Shuri and Okoye. I know that I have you, but I've always had Bucky and I can't lose him. Do you understand?"

Sam sighed. 

"Sure, I understand, Jo. I just don't think I can lose you." 

Joana nodded although she knew that Sam couldn't see her. 

"I'll see you when you get back?" She said finally. 

"Yeah. We should be home tomorrow." 

"I'll be here." 

***

Shuri found Joana a few hours later, sitting and watching Bucky in his container. 

"Hey," Shuri said. She was no longer wearing her armor, but an asymmetrical skirt with a pair of enhanced Doc Martins and a hand cut Looney Tunes T-shirt. 

"Hey," was Joana's quick reply. 

"That guy you asked me to find, Jimmy Leon? Well, find him I did. He lives in Brooklyn, New York. He and his wife own this clothing store. Here's the address." 

Shuri handed Joana a slip of paper. Joana opened it and her stomach dropped. 

The address on the paper was the same as Joana's Grams' shop. 

Joana's grandnephew was living in the same place Joana herself had been raised. 

It was like some cruel twist of fate. 

Joana was going home. 

*** 

Hey hey!

So here's another little update for you all! This chapter was a little funky to me, but it's supposed to highlight Jo's PTSD and give a little intro to her family. 

The next chapter we will see Joana back in America. She will be joined by a friend and she will meet her family! Which will be exciting.  

Thank you all for reading, voting, and commenting! 

I'll see you next time! 

authorsbane