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Chapter XV: Blood Red

Joana

It was much easier to tell how time passed when Joana knew when Dinner and Breakfast was, when she could see the changing of light outside her tinted window. Days passed into weeks passed into months. She spent more and more time with the woman called Natalia and the Soldier. She found that sometimes, even though all three of them were supposed to be super soldier assassins, they even laughed together. It wasn't much laughter, but it was some. Joana, I will have to tell you, was blinded against something that was brewing the man who once loved her and the woman she now called friend.
Every night, once he had finished with the Wolf Spiders, Natalia would come to the training room to talk with him. It started that she would talk with him about strategy and how to fight better. She wanted to be better than all the other girls, and she was willing to give up her nights to do that. She said that she liked his way of fighting better than Joana's, simply because hers was too animalistic. They would fight for hours. Their hot breath would fog of the glass. They would fight until her body screamed and she could no longer move. He would help her to her room and say nothing of it the next day.
All of this happened under Joana's nose, simply because she did not think it possible.
I assume you would all like to hear of the day Joana found out that those long nights of fighting turned suddenly into something else, and this red haired woman had managed to break the Soldier, but, alas, that story has yet to come.

The days passed as quickly as they did slowly. It felt as if Joana had been at the Red Room for years, but at the same time, it felt like a few mere days. She could not describe it. She was ashamed at the pride she felt when she saw the Wolf Spiders and the Black Widows succeeding. She hated the way she clapped and encouraged during the matches. She burned with anger every time she cheered when a Black Widow bit a Wolf Spider so hard he started to bleed, because Joana taught her that. She was impressed that her young friend was getting increasingly better and better every day, so much more than the other Black Widows. That was true pride.
When Joana wasn't in charge of training anyone, she would sit in on the ballet lessons and watch Mistress teach the girls to dance. They were graceful and beautiful and elegant. Natalia was wonderful. Natalia offered to teach Joana to dance, to which Joana was extremely happy. However, the true reason Natalia asked was so she could ask Joana about the man she was falling in love with.
"How long have you known the Soldier?" She asked once, while they rested. Joana sipped her water and looked away from Natalia, feeling that the lighthearted mood suddenly changed.
"I don't think I'm supposed to say, Natalia," she told the woman. Natalia smiled.
"Come on, Joana. We're spies. We break the rules." Joana turned to looked Natalia in the eyes.
If only you knew, she thought. If only you knew that breaking the rules might cost you your life.
"I have known him since I was 12," Joana said.
"That long?"
"Yes."
"So you knew him before he was the Winter Soldier."
Joana felt her throat tighten. She looked down at the water in her hands.
"Yes. I knew him before he was the Winter Soldier."
"What was his name?"
"His name was James. James Barnes."
"Why don't you call him James, then?"
"When we were younger, our group of friends all called him Bucky. Pierce says I'm not allowed to call him either James nor Bucky in case he starts to remember his old life. Remember me." Joana felt her nose burn. No, she would not cry in front of this girl. It had been nearly a year since she cried, and she would not allow herself to slip up now.
"I'm sorry, Joana," Natalia said, her voice suddenly sorrowful instead of questioning. "I lost my brother when I came here. I haven't seen him since I was 7."
Joana looked over at the woman beside her, who also looked like her eyes were full of tears. Joana grabbed her hand and squeezed it.
"We can do this, Natalia."
She looked at Joana and in that moment, Joana realized that Natalia wasn't the perfect soldier. She wasn't the perfect spy. Natalia didn't want to be a Black Widow. Natalia Romanova wanted to dance, not kill.

Maybe now is the proper time to tell you that once the Mistress and Pierce found out about the relationship between one James Barnes and Natalia Romanova, there is not a shred of happiness for any of these three characters. Maybe now is the time to tell you that once Joana and Bucky were sent back to Siberia, there was no more training, no more friendship, no more possibilities of love. Bucky was ten times more broken than he was before, and, therefore, the Soldier was ten times more dangerous. Maybe now is the time to tell you that this story isn't a happy one. If you wish to carry on, you will learn more about Joana and Bucky, about how HYDRA fell and how they came upon old friends, but if you chose to end here, know that the end isn't one you may like.
After that brief interruption, let us continue.

"What were you talking to her about?" Pierce asked, tapping his glass on his bedside table. Joana pulled her hair into a ponytail, not looking at him.
"Nothing much."
"Like what?"
"Just about her brother. She just wants to dance, Pierce."
Pierce laughed.
"So? She's here now and she's a good fighter. Thanks to you and Barnes," Pierce said. Joana dropped her hands, clenching her jaw. "Do you have something to say, Joana? I give you permission."
Joana whirled around.
"Don't you dare put this on me," she snapped. "Don't put this on me and on Buck-Barnes. He doesn't have a choice. You took his mind from him!"
"And what about you? Do you have a choice?"
"I do, but none of them are good."
"Tell me," Pierce stood, walking towards her. "What do you think your choices are, Joana?"
"Defy you. Stop training them. Try to escape. Risk Bucky's life and the lives of all the kids here. Or, do what you want. I do what you want and I train them and you release them into the world and they kill people. Or..." She stopped herself before she continued. She looked away from him, ashamed of the words she almost said.
"What, Joana? Or what?"
She looked back to him, jaw set, eyes made of stone.
"Or I end it all, here and now."
"What do you mean? Kill me?" Pierce laughed.
"No," she said, underneath his laughter. "No, I kill myself."
Pierce stopped laughing. He looked at her with a cold stare.
"If you do that-"
"If I do that, I cannot be held accountable for anything you do. If you kill any of those kids, if you hurt Bucky, that cannot be put on me, because I will be in Heaven and I will be safe and without pain and without sorrow and I'd be with my Grandmother. I could see Danika again. I would be away from you and you could never touch me ever again." Every word she spoke shocked Pierce with how much emotion each held. He did not doubt that she had often times thought of this was a better way out.
"But you would leave Barnes alone," he spluttered. Joana looked away.
"Which is why I don't do it. I have not the courage."
Pierce looked away from her, unable to process such raw emotion. He had never seen it before, never been so close to it that her actually felt it.
"You mention Danika again. You loved her." Pierce said, taking a long sip from his cup. Joana nodded.
"Very much."
"At the same time as Barnes?"
"In a different way."
Pierce nodded, not facing her.
"You may leave."
Joana had never had a stranger encounter with Pierce, nor would she again. It was almost as if he had actually felt something when she spoke. When she got to her room, Joana had no difficulty finding sleep.

The next morning, Joana was awoke by someone dragging her from her bed and tying her hands behind her back. She screamed, pulling against whoever it was that was holding her. There was definitely more than one of them, and they were stronger than the Wolf Spiders or the Black Widows, which meant they came from Pierce. She shrieked his name in rage as the pushed her out of her room and down the halls. Women and girls in the hallway opened their doors to watch, rubbing the sleep out of their eyes. They followed after the soldiers, whispering among themselves. None of them tried to stop the soldiers.
Joana was paraded through the Red Room, past Wolf Spiders, Black Widows, trainers, soldiers, agents, whoever was watching, until they came to one of the training rooms. The soldiers shoved her into the room and, after cutting the bonds on her wrist, slammed it shut and locked it. She pounded on the door, screaming and shrieking at the soldiers who were just standing there. Crowds of people stood outside the windows, wondering what was happening with their trainer.
Joana turned away from the door and to the people in the room. There was someone strapped to a chair with a bag over their head. Behind that person stood Pierce and two guards. To the right was the Soldier, standing perfectly still like he was supposed to.
"What is this?" She asked, breathing deeply, trying to control her anger.
"This is a school for espionage, dear Joana," Pierce said. "Did you think that we couldn't find someone here who would be able to read lips? Your little Widow friend was smart to find a room where the audio on the tapes don't work, but we are smarter."
He kicked the chair. Out from under the hood came rapid fire Russian. Joana could barely pick up on all of it, but most of it was profanity.
"Natalia." Realization of who was under the hood hit Joana with such a great force, that she had to step backwards. Pierce smiled and pulled the hood off of the woman. The Russian swearing continued.
"I told you your actions would have consequences. You told her things you should not have told her. We don't want to take the time to wipe Barnes again, so we'll just have to kill this young woman before she can talk to him." (Unluckily for Pierce, Bucky and Natalia had been training the night before and she had already told Bucky what his name was and that he knew Joana. Sadly, Pierce didn't know that he no longer had control of his precious Winter Soldier.). "But, I think you should be the one to do it."
Pierce handed the gun he was holding out to her. He walked around the chair (Natalia tried to bite him as he passed), still holding the gun out in front of him. Joana backed away from him as he approached, glancing over at the Soldier, who was still standing stoic, but his breathing had changed.
"You promised," she said through her teeth. "I wouldn't have to kill anyone in front of him."
"Oh, so you'd kill her if Barnes wasn't around?" Pierce asked loudly.
"No! No, of course not. I don't want to kill her," Joana snapped, backing into the door behind her.
"That's your problem, Joana," Pierce said, pointing the gun at her like it was a finger. "You care to much. You caring too much is what got you kidnapped. You caring too much is what got Danika killed."
Joana turned her face away from him.
"Don't talk about Danika," she said through clenched teeth.
"You care so much about all these kids, all of whom you don't know, that you're willing to kill other people just to keep them safe. Is that it, Joana? You're allowed to kill people as long as no one's around to see it?"
"Yes." She growled, glaring daggers at him. "But I won't kill her. Not here. Not because you told me too."
Pierce pointed the gun at her head, pressing it between her eyes. She just stared back at him, egging him to do it with her eyes.
"Oh," Pierce laughed. "That's right. You would want me to shoot you, right? So you don't have to bare this responsibility? Because that's your third option right? You dying?"
Pierce pressed the gun into her hands and grabbed her arms, forcing her to point the gun at Natalia's head. He walked swiftly towards the Soldier, who was looking less and less like the Soldier with every movement Pierce made. Pierce grabbed his hand gun from his side and pointed it at Natalia's head.
"If you don't shoot her, Joana," he cocked the gun. "I will."
There was not an ounce of fear in Natalia's eyes.
"Joana, don't let this piz'da be the one to kill me." She glared up at Pierce, who had his eyes trained on Joana. She also glared at him. She lifted the gun to Joana's head. She looked over at the Soldier and was convinced in that moment, that it wasn't the Soldier standing there anymore, but it wasn't Bucky either. It was someone who didn't know who he was. It was someone who only knew that the two women in front of him were all he had in this life, and Joana was not about turn two into one. She fired the gun, but not at Natalia's head. Instead, this bullet went through the handgun that Pierce was holding. the two guards pulled out their guns to fire on either Natalia or Joana, but their guns were obliterated, just as Pierce's had been. She shot the next two guns the soldiers pulled out.
She put the gun on safety and dropped it to the ground.
She walked over to Natalia and untied her bonds.
"Don't walk away from me, Joana. You won't like what Ill do to you," Pierce warned. Joana lead Natalia to the door. One of Joana's best and favorite Wolf Spider crept between the two soldiers keeping the door locked, and unlocked it.
"Joana, come back here!" Pierce yelled as they left. Natalia flipped him the bird as they left.

***

GUESS WHO JUST FINISHED THREE CHAPTERS IN ONE DAY. That's right. Me.
Anyway, my dog is sleeping on my arm so screw punctuation. I love you guys so much you dont even know
have a wonderful day and keep being beautiful
rock on
authorsbane

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