CH 7 - Acceptance

2nd POV

A while ago

"Notabe... is really strong. Isn't she?" Aran sweatdropped as his eyes tore from Kita amid their conversation to you, who was carrying 15 stacked chairs with your two arms with no signs of any struggle. Most of the members from both teams noticed that, as well. Inarizaki stopped looking when they felt Kita's cold stare.

"She doesn't like it when people bring up that kind of thing for being really strong. Physically," Kita said, leaving Aran confused.

"Is that so? She should be proud, that strength is abnormal. People will be intimidated by her," Aran said but kept quiet when Kita stared at him hard.

"That's exactly why," Kita said with a cold gaze and went back to the team.

Suna scratched his forehead, "Kita-san, I'll go help Sukii-"

"No," Kita blankly said, "Get back to stretching."

"Are you serious?" Osamu gathered his strength to say that in disbelief.

Kita slowly turned to him, "Don't waste time. I also noticed it too late, she's already carrying the last round of chairs. It's pointless to help her, just stretch."

"I'll scold her for not asking for help later," Kita mumbled as he pinched the bridge of his nose. Atsumu just sweatdropped before he ushered Osamu and Suna to stretch with him.

"She's really carrying those things as if they're weightless," Suna shivered as he stretched forward on the floor.

Osamu frowned, "Why didn't anyone help the girls?"

"Some guys helped the manager of Itachiyama. I don't get why they didn't bother helping Sukii," Atsumu said with a dark stare.

"They're probably scared," Suna scoffed.

Osamu had a dark aura around him as his eyes remained cold. Atsumu and Suna noticed this.

"It's fine, man. It happened. We should just be glad that she's not hurt or anything," Suna tried to comfort him.

Atsumu whistled, "And who is that guy? He's talking to Sukii."

Osamu's head whipped faster than lightning when he heard that. Some guy from Itachiyama with black curly hair was talking to her.

They never saw Sukii frozen with something behind her eyes.

Atsumu turned to Osamu who stood up and was about to go to her when he stopped him.

"Are you crazy?! Finish your stretching or Kita-san will have us do laps around the court," He hissed.

"I don't care. Let go of me," Osamu sneered. Suna rolled his eyes and stood up, an arm pushing Osamu back.

"Chill out, Osamu. It's not like he'll do anything to her. Look, she's already walking away," Suna sighed. Osamu turned back to you and sighed in relief when she saw you talking to Itachiyama's manager again.

"Calm down, little brother," Atsumu snickered and yelped when Osamu kicked him on the face.

"Hey! Watch out!" A player from Itachiyama yelled to your direction.

Kita, Aran, Osamu, Atsumu, Suna, and the rest of Inarizaki had their eyes wide and unable to get to you in time as they saw the ball come at you at a fast speed.

You faced your palm towards the ball and watched as it spins harsh before losing momentum. You transferred your stare from Kawaru, to the ball that dropped on the ground.

You picked it up and noticed the gym got quiet. Not wanting anymore attention, you gave it back to a guy from Itachiyama who bowed continuously before going back to his team.

"Let's move somewhere safer," You said to Kawaru whose face is still in shock but followed you when you moved away from the place you both were earlier.

"N-Notabe! Are you okay?! Does your hand hurt?" She panicked as she grabbed your unharmed hand.

You blinked, "I'm okay. Should it hurt?"

She facepalmed hard, "Usually when someone's hand as soft as a pillow makes contact with a heavy stray ball, yes it would hurt! God, you silly girl."

Her eyes carried concern and fear, the fear for herself increased. But she wasn't scared of you. You glanced back to the court with the players that continued to stretch and rally with each other. Your eyes almost met his but you already looked back to Kawaru.

Before you could say anything, Kita and the others already ran to you.

"Are you hurt? Anywhere? Who hit the f.. the ball," Kita breathed hard and refrained himself from cursing.

"Sukii, you good??" Suna's brows furrowed as he asked.

Atsumu walked to you and checked your hand at every corner like a protective brother. Osamu glared back at the court and saw Itachiyama's ace glancing at your direction with concern in his eyes.

Aran chuckled, "She looks fine. You three need to stop exaggerating."

"I'm okay, really. Please stop and go back, you're scaring Kawaru-san," You smiled a little as Kawaru tensed up and looked away.

Kita sighed and grabbed your hand. You looked over your shoulder to wave at Kawaru to which she waved back at you. You sweatdropped when the twins and Suna glared at her as if saying 'Why didn't you take the hit instead?'.

You told yourself you'll scold them later.

Aran turned to you, "Notabe, you sure you're alright?"

You turned to him with a smile and a slight bow, "I am. Sorry if I caused you and the others to worry. But really - I'm unharmed."

"Must be nice to be st- to be uh, unbothered," He hummed with a little nervousness.

You just laughed nervously as you turned to Kita who was glaring at you.

"Shin?" You nervously asked.

"Never. Leave. My. Side. Didn't I make that clear to you just yesterday on the phone?" He said.

You shrieked as Aran laughed. He patted you on the back before going back to the court after resting.

"I'm sorry, I wasn't paying attention to my surroundings..," You mumbled.

"You're mumbling."

"I said I'm sorry that I wasn't paying attention to my surroundings," You bit your lip, almost tearing up.

He sighed and went close to you, your eyes widened when he hugged you, pulling your head close to his chest with a hand before caressing it.

"I don't want you getting hurt, Sukii. Please just be more careful. I don't care if you're unharmed - you're not being careful," He took a step back and dropped his hand to his side, "The match is starting. Go sit close with the coaches and make sure to keep your eyes sharp."

You nodded with a smile, "I will, Shin. Thank you."

You watched as he made his way back to the court with the others. Osamu was staring at you from the court. You waved at him and he waved back before focusing on the opponents in front of them.

The moment you sat down, the coaches asked if you were alright, and gave you your clipboard after reassuring them. Kawaru waved at you from the other side and you gave her a smile before writing down in your attendance.

I can feel him staring. You gulped as your grip to your pen tightened.

Your eyes turned to Atsumu who keeps making perfect sets to the members. Osamu jumped and scored, he glanced at you quickly as if making sure you saw that before high-fiving Atsumu. A smile crept its way to your lips.

You sighed. You knew he purposely hit that ball close to you earlier. A frown replaced your smile - he knew you wouldn't be hurt by some spikes. He just wanted you to look at him again.

Rallies passed by back and forth, the sets were always so close but it was no denying that Itachiyama is stronger than Inarizaki. It wasn't an official match, but the twins are playing competitively.

The practice match set by the coaches was planned to take place for 15 sets, resting per 3 sets. It was planned to take place the whole day, from 9AM to 5PM.

"Are you fucking kidding?!" Suna muttered under his breath when the ace of Itachiyama made a blockout that was about to hit you again.

You remained calm and just tilted your head to your side as the ball zoomed past your ear. Kita's jaw clenched hard.

You finally looked at him as he bowed. You caught a glimpse of a small smirk in his lips before he walked back to the serving area.

You know, to anyone's eyes, it would look like you were trying to kill me. You sweatdropped as you kept looking at him.

Whistle. The match ended with most of Itachiyama's win. Inarizaki won 6 sets out 15, and Itachiyama won 9 of them.

Time flies too fast. It was a little painful for you. You kept tending to the players and refilling their bottles while constantly having to burn your mind to take a lot of notes and evaluation.

Usually, physical activities wouldn't tire you out. You knew you could run for miles and experience fatigue after 2 hours of consistent running. Your strength allowed you to carry things that seemed heavier for anyone, but you never liked to show people given their fear.

You'd always lose friends and people when they realized how strong you were. They said it to your face one time - that you seemed like a monster. It happens, too, whenever you'd eat heaps of meals before them. They'd say you're an extreme glutton.

"Good evening."

You froze again.

The coaches of Inarizaki smiled and greeted the coaches of Itachiyama, "Ah! Good evening. Thank you for the games - you didn't disappoint."

Itachiyama's coach grinned, "You seem to have not changed at all. Still training top seed athletes while pushing 50."

Both teams exchanged conversations, even some of the players. The twins were exhausted and is almost in the brink of sleeping after they drank their energy drinks. Suna was on the ground, pressing on his phone. Kita was talking with Itachiyama's captain and having a serious conversation.

"Excuse me."

The coaches of Inarizaki turned to the guy with a confused look, "Yes?"

"May I borrow your manager's time? I'd like to talk to her and apologize," He said, grabbing the attention of some of the players, especially the twins' and Suna's.

The coaches looked at you as you remained calm, "I'm fine with it. Excuse me."

You bowed to them and followed him out of the gymnasium.

Osamu gripped his bottle tightly as he just stared at you and the guy exiting the place.

"Hey."

You remained silent and just stared at the tree beside him.

"Look at me."

You dragged your eyes to meet his soft ones.

"..Hello," You muttered, "You don't need to apologize, it's fi-"

"You know I'm not here to apologize."

The weight on your shoulders sunk deeper.

He sighed, "I want to talk."

"What's there to talk about, Kiyo?" You asked, your voice in a whisper, "I've wronged you. That's it. There's nothing to talk about."

"You never told me why," He whispered, "You just left.... you left me."

Tears fell from your eyes as you tried to stop them with your fingers.

"Please just tell me why-"

"Because I loved you."

You sniffled as you saw his shocked eyes through the blur of your tears. He gulped and opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something, but he couldn't.

"You know how hard it was for me to constantly ignore what other people say. When they started to involve you - I just couldn't," You sobbed quietly.

"Kii...," He softly said.

"Please don't call me that anymore," You whispered and was about to turn back but he grabbed your hand.

"Don't touch me!" You almost yelled.

Hurt flashed in his eyes as he lets his hand fall to his side.

"I wanted to court you, Kii," He started, "But you weren't letting me."

"I understand all too well why you did. But I never complained and I never stopped. You're scared to let people in because you're afraid that they're bound to leave you like the others. I won't.. and until now I still won't," He said as he grabbed your hands and held them gently.

He nudged his head towards your hands, "This? This never bothered me when I'm with you. No matter how I am, and how you are, we've always accepted each other."

"Why couldn't you just... let me love you back then?" He whispered as sadness flooded his eyes. For once, you saw emotions behind them.

"I can't, Kiyo. I can't allow you," You started to cry harder, "I can't have people judging you behind your back. I can't handle the fear of things changing between us that lingered everyday."

"I can't let you live like that - you deserved so much better. You don't deserve me, I don't deserve me. I am a bacteria to you, Kiyo," You sobbed violently.

He hugged you tightly as you let your cries out. You felt his chest rise and drop with heavy breaths, from both the practice and to suppress his emotions.

"I was ready to let it all happen. I was ready to tolerate them all just for you," He said, "Whatever you're insecure about.. I've always accepted them since the beginning, didn't I?"

You pulled away from him and stopped yourself from crying anymore.

A shaky sigh escaped your lips, "It was 2 years ago, Kiyo... please just let go of it."

He pursed his lips, "And if I don't?"

You stared at him for a good amount of time before taking your glasses off and wiping your tears with your handkerchief from your pocket. You inhaled.

"I fell out of love."

He froze.

"The fear consumed me, Kiyo," Your dull eyes met his hurt ones, "I let my fears get the best of me, and it made me detach myself from you."

You laughed weakly, "I'm so petty, aren't I?"

"I realized the moment that I couldn't feel what I once felt for you back then.. I stopped myself. I couldn't handle the fact that you never stopped caring about me when my fear ordered me to stop caring about you anymore."

"I'm an asshole, Kiyo," You said to him while feeling the need to cry again, "I don't deserve you."

"I'm sorry... I don't love you anymore," You whispered.

It was silent for a while, with only your hiccups that accompanied you both. He was still in his spot and you were a mess.

You knew from the beginning that you're not someone deserving of such affectionate things such as love. You didn't deserve having someone to love you when you kept getting your fears get the best of you. You're always a slave to your fear, after all.

"I understand."

You turned to him. He was smiling lightly, sadness behind them. Yet his eyes had acceptance.

"I guess even now, I never stopped being selfless," He chuckled, "If that's what you feel, then as always, I'll accept it."

"...," Words didn't find itself out of your mouth.

"I'm sorry as well if I made you feel pressured," He sighed and raked his hair with his fingers, "We can't help it, can we? We weren't just a perfect match. Though I don't give a shit about such things."

"I'm not the same as I was back then," He walked closer to you, "I have been learning to understand people better."

You looked down to the ground.

"All those years I keep thinking about what I could have done wrong. But now that you told me, at least now I can rest easy knowing why," He grinned, "We were only kids, after all. I can understand how it didn't turn out well."

"If it happened later as we are right now, maybe it would've worked out," His eyes had sadness and regret in them, "But it'll be alright now."

"You'll be alright," Kiyo assured as he opened his arms again.

Without a second thought, you returned them.

"Don't feel guilty," He muttered, "It's alright. I'll be alright."

You started to cry again, "I'm ruining your shirt.."

"Shh. Just let it out."

"Thank you, Kiyo. You've done nothing but be good to me..."

He just smiled and let you regulate your emotions.

You did as he said and let it all out, your heart's burden kept getting less and less with every stroke of his hand on your back and his words of reassurance.

You truly didn't deserve him.

"I noticed something," He said as you both pulled away.

"What..?" You asked.

He hummed, "That number 11 has been looking at you all the time. You like him or only he does?"

"I don't.. understand," You frowned.

He fixed your glasses on your face and put a fringe behind an ear, "He seems nice. You seem to like him, as well. I can tell."

You stayed silent, "... I don't think so."

He chuckled and sighed, "You'll notice it after some time. I have a good feeling things would go well with him. Maybe, just maybe, he'll be the one to remove your fears instead."

"He's there, looking for you right now. Are you ready to go back?"

You stared at him before sniffling. With a nod of your head, he waited for you to fix your appearance before you and him entered the gym again.

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