↩↩Flash Forward↩↩

Remus fell down to his knees. The rain fell in frosty shards and pierced into his back like nails.
His tears mixed with the tiny droplets of rain making his eyes look misty.

He didn't have any reason to live.
He had lost the only thing which gave him a reason to live. To thrive in the misery inflicted upon him by the dark side.

The wounds which had healed started burning once again bringing with it a fierce ball of hatred and the inhuman wish of vengeance. He was absorbed in pain and wanted nothing else than to wreck all the people who had caused this.

For the first time in his life, he deliberately called the monster within him. He was so enraged with fury he couldn't hear the dripping of rain anymore.

He knew he had to calm down before he ended up doing something he would regret but couldn't do it.

She was all he had. No more.
As he howled in pain into the night sky, he knew the ghastly scene would haunt him for the rest of his life and he would never be able to move on.

Before he ripped the final shreds of humanity left in him, he took a deep sigh, and then—

↩↩ Flashback ↩↩

He woke up with a start.

Excitement buzzed in him and he decided to get ready. He couldn't sleep any longer.
He wanted nothing more than to reach his dorm in Hogwarts.

That day he would be starting sixth year. He knew that his hogwart years were almost over and soon he would have to live in dread because of the war.

He hoped that his friends and family could survive. As for him, he knew they would come for him. Sooner or later, you know who would want to recruit all werewolves and he would be escorted to where he truly belonged.

A shiver ran down his back as he shook his head. He decided not to have such pale pessimistic thoughts and to think about the year he was going to have.

He had already studied most of the books. He no longer had to take divination or care of magical creatures. He had gotten 10 OWLs, more than all his friends.

He assured himself that it would be a good year. He hadn't talked with either James, Sirius or Peter for the last two weeks.

He had heard that Sirius was once again rebelling against his family, this time by building a muggle motorbike from crap he found in unusual places.

Meanwhile, James was writing apology letters to his lifetime crush, Lily Evans for the scene which took place at the end of the year.

And Peter was eating more bacon than usual.

As for him, nothing was new with him. He was taking care of the household as his dad was too tired from ministry work because of the war.

He had confirmed with James to meet him in front of his house.

On the influence of Sirius and Remus, James had decided to try muggle for a while. He had ended up stealing a black mercedes.

He knocked on his dad's door. On no reply, he entered. As he saw his dad sleeping, he didn't feel like waking him. He had just found a moment's sleep and Remus had no intention of ruining it. His mother's death had gone hard on both of them but Remus had moved on..

As for his dad, though he put on a brave and cheerful face, Remus could detect sadness and misery beneath the eyes which were once always joyful.

He heard a screech in his backyard and knew it was James. He pushed his trolley and by one hand held the hook of the cage of his owl Theodore.

'Coming' he shouted.
As he opened the door he laughed at what he saw.

Within a few week's time- James had managed to ruin the once glamorous car.
Now it was filled with scratched and terrible dents.

James cast a smirk at him. His hair was messier than usual.
Other than which he remained the same. He wore a leather jacket and jeans which had spots of mud around them.

When he saw Remus noticing them while getting in the car, he shrugged.

'It's from padfoot's garage. The spots.'

'He has a garage? Since when?'

'Since a few days. He couldn't risk leaving his motorbike in the street. Anyway, what's new with you, Remus?'

'Nothing. Just same old Remus.'
'Swear that you didn't read any book.'

James had challenged him two weeks ago, that Remus couldn't go two weeks without reading a book.

Remus had accepted it but had ended up reading one, three hours later.

He sighed and dropped a few galleons in James's hands.

'Are we picking Sirius or Peter up as well?' he asked.

'Peter's coming with his dad.' James said while taking a turn.

'What about Sirius?'
'Why do you think I came so early, you dummy?'

'So we can be punctual?'
'I am punctual. We will reach by 11.'

'But we should reach a little early- Why don't you pay attention to me while—'

'While you are droning on and on? Well, I have a few things going on in my mind.'

'What were you thinking about?'
'When you will stop worrying so much and stop speaking crap.'

'James, slow down.'
Remus ducked as James took a swift turn.

'Why should I slow down?'
'So we won't die?'

'Give me a valid reason.'
'So death isn't a valid reason for you?'
'Nah. What else you got?'

'You might get arrested for reckless driving?'

'Happened 28 times in the last eight days. Padfoot bailed me out.'

'And yet you never learn. Slow down, or we will get arrested and never reach Hogwarts.'

'Thats the plan.'

'What the hell, James? Are you drunk?'
'A little. It goes on and off.'

'Stop the car. Stop the car.'

James applied the brakes. 'What is the matter with you moony?'

'Swap seats with me. I mean it.'
'You are so boring.' he said but got out of the car.

Remus did the same and got in the driving seat.

Remus slowed down and started driving at a moderate rate ignoring James's chants of faster.

Suddenly he was stopped by cops.
'Look, what you did remmy.'

'Its nothing. Just give me your driving license.' Remus said.

'I don't have one.'
'You have got to be kidding me.'

'The burly cop is looking at me strangely.' James said.

'Check your pockets.'
'Here.'

'This is not your license.' the guard said.

'It is. I am Peter.'

'Pay up or else it's gonna get bad.'

'James, do you have muggle money—'
But James was already snoring.

'Wait a minute. I will check what I got.'

'Here's the money.' A voice came and then opened the car.

'Sirius? What the hell? How did you—'

Sirius closed the door with a clang.
'Fast. Drive fast.'

'Fine, I will drive.'

'What's the matter with him? Drunk again and passed out?'

Remus nodded.
'I am surprised you are not the same.'

'My body is so used to getting drunk it doesn't pass out anymore.'

'You are a moron.'
'Says the kid who hasn't drunk firewhiskey in his life.'

'It is illegal to drink before seventeen.'
'I started drinking when I was thirteen.'

'The rules don't change.'
'Remus do you know why there are rules?'

'To maintain harmony and peace and live life in perfect coordination?'

'Noo. Stop spouting history crap on me. The people who follow rules are those who are afraid to change and the other's are those who make their own damn rules. Trust me, a man is remembered for the rules he breaks.'

'Yeah, like this isn't crap.'
***