Chapter 10

I was so happy during my whole flight because I’m now going back to the Philippines. When the plane landed and as I left the airport, my smile grew bigger with the thought of surprising someone today, but suddenly I got stuck on my spot when I heard a very familiar voice calling my name.

“Lacey, love!”

I instantly gazed in that direction and even put my shades away to check if I’m seeing Harold now. Nakatayo siya sa harap ng isang kotse at may hawak itong bulaklak sa kaliwang kamay. His free hand was in the air, waving at me.

“Harold?” I asked in disbelief and when my skepticism satisfied me, I run over his direction. “Gosh, it’s really you!” I unconsciously let go of my stuff and clung my arms to his nape. Kulang na lang ay magpabuhat ako sa kanya.

Rinig ko ang pagtawa nito, kaakibat ang pagyakap niya sa akin pabalik. Ramdam ko rin ang paghaplos niya sa buhok ko.

“I missed you so much!” I honestly shared when we get off each other.

”I missed you too,” he smiled. “Here, for you.” Nalipat ang tingin ko sa bungkos ng bulaklak na hawak niya. “Happy monthsarry, love.”

I pressed my lips because my smile couldn't stop growing bigger. I guess this was the sweetest way to celebrate our first month together. Just me coming back here and him fetching me. “You don’t have to do this, but I really appreciate it, love. Thank you.”

Harold took my things and brought them to his car’s compartment, then we went inside. Before he could start the car’s engine, I stopped him. I stared at his face for seconds and allowed my heart to dictate what it wanted.

“May I kiss you?” I asked, but I didn’t wait for his response. I just closed the gap between us and reached for him to which he gladly answered back.

Sa gitna ng halikang iyon, ramdam ko ang pareho naming pagngiti bago binitawan ang isa’t isa.

“What was that?” nangingiti pa rin nitong tanong.

“I really missed you. Happy monthsarry to us. I love you.”

Harold caressed my cheek, pulled me into him, and kissed me on my forehead. “I love you too.”

That sweet moment was interrupted when my stomach grumbled. Natawa kami pareho dahil panira ng momentum ’tong sikmura ko. He asked me if I want to eat and where to. Kako ay doon na lang sa unang restaurant na aming makikita.

“You tired? You take a nap first. Gisingin na lang kita mamaya,” he spoke up when he noticed me yawning.

Hindi naman na ako tumanggi pa dahil napagod ako sa byahe. As the car is now moving, I just let my body do what it wanted and dozed off that easily. Nagising na lang ako na para bang may nakatitig sa akin, at tama nga ang hinala ko.

“What time is it?” I asked him.

“5 in the afternoon.”

“That fast?” gulat kong tanong. Bandang 11 noong umalis kami sa airport. Hindi ko alam na alas singko na pala. “Why didn’t you wake me up? Akala ko kakain pa tayo?” I didn’t know what happened but we were already here at my house.

Harold stood and went near me. Walang sabi-sabing tumabi ito sa akin pahiga. He leaned on the headboard, though. He tugged me in his body, allowing me to pillow in his arm. “I didn’t want to disturb your peaceful sleep, my love.”

“Did you carry me inside my room?”

“No, you sleepwalk,” panloloko nito at pinisil ang ilong ko. “Hindi na kita ginising kanina. Ang himbing kasi ng tulog mo.”

“How about you? Hindi ka kumain?”

“Don’t mind me. I already had my food before picking you up at the airport.”

Touched by the thought of him picking me up, isinuksok ko ang katawan ko sa kanya. “Thank you, love. I was really surprised to see you at the airport earlier.”

“Are you happy?”

“I am.” Mas lalo ko pang isiniksik ang katawan ko sa kanya. “But how did you know that I’m returning today?” Doon ko siya binitawan.

I was planning to surprise him today for our first month; turned out it was me who got surprised. Hindi ko ipinaalam na ngayon ako uuwi dahil balak ko talagang surpresahin siya kaya nagulat ako na siya pala ang susundo sa akin.

“Your sister tipped me.”

“Kate?” Nang tumango ito ay napangiwi na lamang ako. “Oh, that brat just ruined my surprise.”

Lumakas ang tawa nito. On the other hand, I can’t hide my happiness. I’m happy that I’m finally back, and that he’s already close with my siblings.

When I got back to California, I told my family about our relationship. Kaya kapag nag-uusap kaming dalawa, nakikisali ang mga kapatid ko, even Dad. Masaya lang ako na kahit hindi pa nila siya nakikita ng personal ay tanggap nila ang relasyon naming dalawa.

Our classes for the second semester quickly resumed and we became busier this time since we were focused on our on-the-job training. Sinabayan pa ng walang sawang pag-eedit sa thesis. Iyong pagod kang uuwi dahil sa OJT, tapos ang sasalubong naman sa’yo ay ’yung thesis niyo.

Base sa napag-usapan para sa OJT namin, mag-sstay muna kami ng more than a month sa isang fast food chain, then sa susunod ay sa isang hotel. Iyong thesis naman ay isinisingit namin kapag may free time kami.

Gano’n ang naging takbo ng buhay ko sa loob ng ilang buwan pero masaya naman ako. Even if it is hard and it’s draining the whole me, I had to keep going. Hard work pays off ika nga nila. Last naman na ’to at alam ko, graduation ang magiging kapalit nito.

My relationship with Harold is getting stronger despite the differences in our schedules, knowing that we also have different programs. Thanks to technology we still make ways to talk to each other.

I beeped my car when I saw Harold getting out of the company building where he was deployed. Nagtungo kaagad ito sa direksyon ko. Pagkapasok niya sa kotse, halata man ang pagod niya pero nginitian pa rin niya ako.

“How was your internship here?”

“It was fine. The employees are taking good care of us,” he shared.

Much with the talk, I brought the car back to life and we went to the park where we had our first date. We walked hand in hand while sharing our experiences in our internship. We also bought something to eat as we converse about such stuff.

“Love...” I looked at Harold when he called me.

“Hmm, what is it?” I dipped my fries in its sauce without cutting my stare at him.

“I want to introduce you to my parents.”

That left me in awe as what-ifs are now circulating in my mind. He once mentioned that their parents wanted his engagement with Rhian Cassandra to happen. Ngayong gusto niya akong ipakilala sa magulang niya, hindi ko alam kung papaano. What if they will not accept me?

“Lacey Anne, love?” Nabalik ako sa huwisyo nang tapikin niya ako.

“Uhh...” I reacted and looked down. “I’m... not sure? Paano kung ayaw sa akin ng magulang mo? What if they wanted us to break up because of your engagement? What if—”

“Love, hey...” Harold held my chin up. “I didn’t know you were already thinking that much.” Natawa ito sa hindi malamang dahilan samantalang ako ay kung anu-ano na ang mga naiisip ko. “I’m here, okay? Hindi naman kita pababayaan.”

“I can’t help it, love. Paano kung paghiwalayin tayo?” I mumbled.

“That’s not gonna happen. I won’t let anyone break us apart,” he assured me. Hinila niya ako at pinasandal sa balikat niya. “Just trust me, love. Isa pa, gusto talaga kitang ipakilala. I want them to know that you’re the one I love.”

Despite the doubts I had at the back of my head, I smiled because of what he said. How can I not love this man more?

That day came and I feel like it was the end of me. Sakay kami ngayon ng kotse ni Harold at papunta na sa bahay nila. I tried to stay positive, but I can’t avoid the possibilities that might happen.

Nalipat ang tingin ko kay Harold nang hawakan nito ang kamay ko, at binigyan niya ako ng isang matamis na ngiti. I also smiled back as I tightened my grip on his hand. Kahit papaano’y medyo gumaan ang pakiramdam ko. I have to trust Harold. I have to trust us.

Ngunit kahit gaano ko pang pinapagaan ang pakiramdam ko, biglang naglaho iyon nang huminto ang sasakyan sa isang magarang bahay.

“We’re already here,” Harold announced.

Kahit kabado ma’y kinuha ko pa rin ’yung isang paper bag, saka ako lumabas. Harold then took my hand and we both went inside the house. When we reached the living area, a sophisticated woman, with crossed legs while holding a magazine was there.

“Ma,” Harold took that woman’s attention and that’s when I confirmed it was his mother.

Her attention shifted to us, but her eyes quickly landed on our hands that were being entwined. Pakiramdam ko ay lalabas ang puso ko sa sobrang kaba, kung hindi lamang sa paghigpit ng hawak ni Harold sa kamay ko’y hindi pa ako kakalma.

“Is she the person you wanted us to meet?” Her refined voice almost ate me under pressure. It was so calm that it made me uncomfortable.

“Yes, Ma. She’s Lacey Anne Imperial, my girlfriend,” diretsahang pakilala ni Harold sa akin.

When she looked at me, I pressed my lips. “Good afternoon po, Ma’am. I’m Lacey Anne Imperial. I brought some tea here po. Sana po magustuhan niyo.” Maingat kong ibinaba ’yung paper bag sa center table.

“Have a seat,” aniya sa amin at nagpakuha ito ng mimiryendahin sa kasambahay nila. “How long have you been together?”

I looked at Harold, but he gave me a smile that tells me to answer his mom’s questions honestly and comfortably. “It’s not that long po. We’ve been together for months pa lang po.”

“I see,” tumango ito. Ibinalik niya ulit ang paningin niya sa hawak niyang magazine at kalauna’y nagsalita. “Are you aware of Harold’s engagement?”

Napadampi ako ng labi. Bawat salita nito’y para akong kinakapos ng hininga. “Y...yes po.”

“Hmm...” Her eyes were still on the magazine, not until she closed it and put it aside. “Then I supposed... you should know your place.”

“Ma!” Harold’s tone slightly rose, while I embarrassingly looked at my feet.

I can already feel the tension building if it weren’t for the two maids who came and serve the food in front of us. Binalot kami ng katahimikan at tanging ang tunog lamang ng mga kutsara’t baso ang naririnig. Nang makaalis ang mga kasambahay ay tila naririnig ko na ang malakas na kabog ng dibdib ko.

“Ma, I didn’t invite my girlfriend here for you to give her that kind of treatment,” told Harold with his calm voice.

“What?” his Mom asked. “I’m being nice here. Besides, she’s lucky I let her in.” Nalipat ang tingin nito sa akin dahilan para mapaiwas ako. “Anyway, enjoy the food.”

Higit ang hininga ko hanggang sa tumayo ito’t mawala sa paningin namin ni Harold. I feel like there’s something trapped in my chest.

“I’m sorry about that, love. Are you okay?” nag-aalalang tanong nito sa akin.

“I am... not,” pag-amin ko. “Pease take me out here.” I could barely hear my voice.

Minuto ang lumipas, namalayan ko na lang na nasa loob na kami ng kotse nito at parang doon lang ako nakahinga nang maluwag. Harold held both my shoulders and I can feel how sorry he is for me.

“It’s alright. I already anticipated this...” Binigyan ko ito ng pilit na ngiti.

Yes, I already anticipated this, considering that it was them who set that engagement for Harold and Rhian, but I didn’t know it would hurt me this much. His mother’s word of choice wasn’t directly telling me that she doesn’t like me, but that’s how it is.

“I’m sorry, love,” nahihiyang pahayag nito.

Nginitian ko lang siya, pinipilit ang sariling maging okay. Nang yakapin niya ako’y doon ko naramdaman ang bigat sa dibdib ko. “Don’t worry, we will not break up. I will not break you up.”

He asked me if I wanted to go home, but I told him to take me somewhere because I wanted to breathe some air. Of all the places he could take me, he stopped the car in a place I least expected — the cemetery.

“Why are we here?” naguguluhan kong tanong nang alalayan ako nito pababa.

“I told you I wanted to introduce you to my parents.” Before I could process everything, I just found out that we were already standing in front of a tombstone.

“Love?” pagkuha ko sa atensyon niya ngunit nakatitig lamang siya roon sa puntod. Maya-maya pa’y nilingon niya ako’t nginitian. Hinila niya ako papalapit sa kanya at hindi binitawan ang kamay ko.

“He’s Harry Guevarra, my father.” Behind his smile was an untold story I didn’t know he had. “Pa, it’s been a while. I’m sorry if it took me this long to visit you.”

I just stared at Harold while he was talking to his father.

“I’m not alone, Pa. May kasama po pala ako.” Harold then glanced at me. “She’s Lacey Anne Imperial, my girlfriend. She's beautiful, right?”

Although I couldn’t see his father anymore, I still greeted him. Naupo kami sa harap ng puntod ng papa nito at doon ito nagkwento sa akin. His father died due to a car accident. He was in his high school year at that time, and he mentioned that it was his first heartbreak the fact that he’s the person he’s closest with.

I felt bad for him. Losing a parent is really hard.

“Ang daya talaga ’no?" I asked him. “Why do we have to lose our loved ones? Why do we have to suffer this kind of pain?” That made Harold pay attention to me, or probably to what I said.

“But I don’t know what’s more painful. Is it losing someone you love permanently or not having the slightest chance to see the person you missed dearly?” This time, I was the one giving a faint smile.

“What do you mean by that?”

“It’s about my Mom,” I breathed heavily. “It’s been years since the last time I saw her. I was just seven when she left me. I don’t even know if she already... abandoned me,” mapait kong usal.

“Care to share your story with me?”

Huminga ako nang malalim bago naisipang magkwento sa kanya. Ang tagal na rin simula noong maibahagi ko ’to sa iba. Maybe it would help me ease the pain, even just a bit of it.

“My mother’s name is Lili Acosta. She’s a Filipina. My parents met when Mom went to the United States. I couldn’t remember the story that much since I was a kid at that time, but I know we had a happy family before. Then things just happened. She left me when I was seven.”

Ngumiti ako pero naroon pa rin ’yung bigat sa dibdib ko. Hindi ko kasi masabi kung makikita ko pa ba talaga siya o wala ng pag-asa.

“She’s the reason why I was here. I traveled here alone and continued my life in this completely foreign country in hopes to find her while studying. But you see, ga-graduate na ako ngayong taon pero wala pa rin akong nakakalap ni katiting na impormasyon.” It was me who was sharing my story, but I could feel the pain in my own voice.

“Have you tried seeking help?”

“I did. I kept looking at her until now. I even had my investigators, but there was no trace of her.” And that was the depressing part for me. I already did everything I could but there’s no progress at all.

Harold took my hand. “I’m sorry if I only learned this now. But you now have me, Lacey. Let’s look for your mother together.” He smiled at me and it somehow helped me feel better.

I also smiled back in the end. It felt good to have someone whom you can lean on, and I’m happy that it was Harold. Now I have someone with whom I can share all my thoughts and feelings.