a/n: double update uwu

Jade listened to him. So now she stood on the once familiar rooftop. She used to love this place, but now all it brought were bad memories. This is exactly where she had met Jaebum, and this was where Jisoo tried to kill her.

He had said it being just a simple nudge from Vicki, he hadn't even known that she had tried to get him to play her until hearing it from Hyunjin. But still...a lot of it, up until the past couple months, hadn't exactly been real. Because although he hadn't known of Vicki's plans, Wang had known what type of person he was, and that he would've naturally tried to mess with her feelings. In a way, she had outsmarted him.

"So." Jade looks at the trees. "That kiss in the closet wasn't real was it?" The brooding silence that forms after her bitter question only confirms her thoughts. No, it hadn't.

Even then though, seeing him so regretful and upset over what damage he had caused makes her feel both good and bad. It was good he felt bad, because he had really hurt her feelings. Still though...part of her really liked him. It wasn't fair on her part to let him continue to beat himself up over something.

It was his fault though! None of this wouldn't have happened had it not been for Vicki.

"When did it start?"

He hums, looking up from the ground. "Huh?"

"When did you start having feelings?"

"I don't know." Jaebum admits. "I think...it was after the kiss." And at those words, Jade tries her best not to scoff. Really. It took all that and a kiss to genuinely get his attention. He is one hell of a good liar, he had her fooled the entire time. And this time she thought she was the one playing these wealthy brats.

"Look. Bottom line, I realize I was a jerk. And I hadn't even been honest with you once we became friends. But...I mean it when I say I'm sorry. I genuinely am. Jade, I don't think I could handle you being mad at me for the remainder of the year."

He's right. This upset would cause a rift in their friend group if she didn't do something about it. But it was already weird to begin with. Asides from Ryu, both the boys were interlocked into a tightly woven love triangle. And she cannot say she doesn't like Jeongguk anymore. This whole instance makes her want to choose him more...but Jade knows in her heart that isn't the logical move.

Truth be told, she likes them both very equally, though this situation dampened her trust in Jaebum by a large factor. Yet when she looks back at it, he had been the one who willingly offered to stay on call with her when she confronted Jisoo. He had said he would even be on stand-by had Jade not stopped him. That had been potentially fatal situation...if Jaebum really didn't care, he wouldn't have done all that. Jisoo had a goddamn gun on her.

"It's because of Ryujin and Ryujin only that I say this." Jade sighs. "I'll give you a second chance, because I don't want whatever circle we have go to shit because of our problems. But this is your last and only chance. If you blow it in any way, our association is over."

"You're lucky that I still like you even after all of this." She admits, stormy eyes staring ahead. "And frankly, it's the only thing that's making me forgive you. I just can't tolerate when people try to play and belittle me like that, and in that moment your actions were as low as Hyunjin's. So never do it again."

§

Her feelings of hurt fade with time, and sooner than she realizes, the tension between their group has eased and conversations floats almost as light as feathers. Jaebum is starting to prepare for his final exams, he even extended tickets out to each of them for his graduation, and the very grand graduation party his parents were throwing in his honor.

A couple days ago, he had asked Jade to be his date to the event. Though they weren't an item yet, and now she can say they have been talking for almost the entire school year despite having many rough ups and downs, overall it's been pretty nice.

Ryujin had been right, following a couple weeks after her reconciliation with Jaebum, Jeongguk would occasionally pop up at their group meeting spot with a different girl following after him. So Jade supposed the cycle had begun again. He was still just the same as before, cheerful and impish. Though even then, the glint in his eyes were not as recognizable as before. It wasn't as bright.

Ryujin also remained unchanged throughout all of this. Jade did not get much a chance in the spring to hang out with her because of tennis season. Jeongguk had said she was quite "obsessed with the sport". And to respond with that, the next five minutes had been spent with him bolting across the corridor while Ryu had chased him with her racket.

They had all settled into the new normal. The new happily ever after. When they hadn't been busy sneaking into dead people's rooms, fighting girls on rooftops, or partying in crazy nightclubs, Jade had to say that it was these moments that she enjoyed most. Like the ones spent on the top of the school, with the clear blue sky, lying on her back to determine what shapes the clouds were in.

When the days happened to be one where Jeongguk would choose to bring a girl up here with them, most times he would just lay down and close his eyes, leaving the three to socialize with the naive fourth. Mostly they're shocked to be around the diverse new set of popular kids, while Ryu tries to tell the girl to dump his ass now. And almost every single time, they don't listen. Well Jade can't blame them, she's already seen the side that makes it hard to leave him, so seeing what these girls deal with emotionally wise...it's not something one would want to give up.

He acts like a puppy. Jeongguk is a puppy.

But Lei knows better than the boy is more than that. He is way more though many things seem to weigh him down. They don't meet eyes as much as they used to, it's probably all his own doing. Probably trying to push her away. Not going to lie, it stings a little that despite everything he doesn't want her to stick around, but Jade knows exactly why he does this. He might be good at dealing his own pain, but one's tolerance can only be so high. And this had to be way above the threshold.

It's the fact that they're so similar is why this wouldn't have worked. At least not now when they're still teenagers.

Somewhere in the middle of when she's cloud watching, Jaebum whispers something to her about going to visit one of his teachers. When he leaves, Jeongguk cracks an eye open from the corner of her vision.

"I see you listened to me." He mumbles, and Ryujin sits up straighter. This is probably the first proper conversation they've had in weeks. Lei turns her head slightly. He's laying his head comfortably on one of the fourth's laps. That girl might think it's a form of endearment, but Jade just looks at her in pure pity and scorn.

"I see you haven't changed." Her words take him by surprise, and he looks at her expectantly. "You know, if you want to change, I suggest you stop going back to your old ways. It's common sense."

"Maybe this is my way of coping. Stay out of it Jade."

She glares at him. "You're a coward."

The girl he's with doesn't seem to like how these two are taking, because it indicates that maybe that once they had been more than friends. And Jade supposed that maybe they had been. Because all he does right now is disappoint her.

It has to be because deep in her heart somewhere, Jade still cares about him. Because maybe she regrets her choice of listening to him. What would have happened if she had chosen him instead of Jaebum? Would he be back in a degenerative cycle like he is now? Or would have things been different?

"I know." Jeongguk admits, which sends her tumbling back into her thoughts. Jade has a feeling if they were truly supposed to be tied in each other's lives, then this wasn't their moment. Because Jeongguk still has his problems, struggles that Jade could not fix for him. His method of coping with grief isn't the best, but maybe this is how he would learn.

Deciding that she can't look at him like that any longer, Jade gets up. She looks down on the fourth he's talking to, then sighs.

"Look. If you have his best interests in mind, you would break up with him." Then she heads for the exit. That girl probably wonders what they had been, for people definitely would've known if they had been in a relationship.

Well, they hadn't. Because whatever those couple weeks had been, it was more than just a simple relationship. Jade recalls the days spent watching him sketch in his book, when he had opened up about his lost lover Chaeyoung, when she had kissed him at the party...

He had been pretty confusing for the entirety of the time, but still, memories with him still brought a smile to her face. Hopefully one day, when things were different, she wouldn't have to look at him with such a crestfallen expression.

The brunette turns the doorknob. Things with Jaebum were great, amazing even. She turns to look at the three who still sit on the sunny roof. Yet, even when she's alone with Jaebum, and Jeongguk is nowhere in sight, her brain still wonders...

What if?

THE END.