AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Hey y'all! This chapter features a lot of Sarah and Annabelle so I thought I'd put them up the top :) I decided to change Sarah to Zendaya since she's styled the cool dreadlocks I've always imagined Sarah to have. 

Leave a vote and comment to let me know what you think so far :D 
Much love,

Becky xx

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Chapter 6

Everything Changes

The world is edging past the train window one inch at a time. Even in the dimming evening light, I can still make out the shape of the trees outside as they lurch in the distance. There are trees everywhere in Westerfield. They line the whole of the village like leafy prison bars.

I press my forehead against the window, taking in the two nervous green eyes reflecting back at me. I don't know if I'm ready for this. Annabelle and Sarah gave me a makeover before we came out, covering my face in their most expensive make-up. My skin looks flawless and my eyelashes are long and glittery. But it's all an illusion. Behind the foundation and mascara, I'm a red, blotchy mess.

I'm disguising myself as someone who wants to go out and have fun. And I don't think I'm fooling anyone. Least of all myself.

"What are you doing?" Annabelle laughs, pulling me away from the window. "You're gonna smear all my beautiful handiwork."

"Sorry," I mumble. "I was just looking at the rabbits outside."

My best friend doesn't look convinced at my lie. "Are you sure about that? Because it looks to me like you're still mooning over Kieran."

"No..." I can't quite meet her eye.

"Ash! You need to forget about him! Just focus on tonight and having a good time."

Sarah is sitting on the seats opposite us and she's nodding enthusiastically at Annabelle's words. "Yeah, exactly. You suggested we go out in the first place so you can't back out now!"

I shrink in my seat. All my bravado from earlier has disappeared. Now I just want to go back home and hide under my duvet. "I know..."

"Come on, buck up," Annabelle commands. "We're going to have a great night. And you look amazing in my dress. Maybe you'll pull someone really fit. That will definitely take your mind off Kieran."

There are so many things wrong with that sentence. First of all, I don't look amazing in Annabelle's dress, however much she and Sarah insists it suits me. Before we left, they spent an hour dressing me up in various pieces of clothing from Annabelle's wardrobe and I've ended up in something black and sparkly with a wide skirt. I love the design, but the problem is that Annabelle is taller than me so the straps keep slipping off my shoulders. I should have just stuck to my own outfit, but they were adamant that I needed a fresh new look to get over my heartbreak.

Secondly, I don't want to think about finding another guy right now. There is no one who will ever match up to Kieran. Not now. Maybe not ever. And anyway, who would even fancy me round here? I'm not glamorous and confident like Annabelle and Sarah. Relationships come easily to them and they always have boys who like them. I find stuff like that much, much harder.

Still, I know they're only trying to help. I guess I should be grateful that they're making an effort now since I was obviously getting on their nerves this morning.

"I doubt that I'll be pulling anything tonight," I reply, forcing a tiny smile. "Except maybe my leg in these heels." I wiggle my feet which are decked in black stilettos with silver sparkles on the toe. They are my favourite shoes in the world but I can barely walk a step in them without slipping up.

"What about Chunk?" Sarah giggles. "He asked you out tonight, didn't he? Do you think he likes you?"

I blush a little. "Don't be stupid, he only asked me out as a mate. It was an invite to all of us."

"But especially to you." She wiggles her eyebrows at me in a suggestive fashion. "He soooo likes you, Ash!"

I shake my head vehemently. "No way! Chunk is just a nice guy. He was trying to cheer me up since I was acting like a total goon in front of him."

I've already told Sarah and Annabelle the story from earlier, about how I ended up in floods of tears in the greengrocers. They were sympathetic for a few minutes, but I get the feeling they want me to shut up about it now.

"Let's hope he's not interested," Annabelle exclaims, wrinkling up her nose. "You can do way better than Charlie sodding Monk. Please tell me you're not that desperate yet."

I feel a slight pang in my chest. "What do you mean? What's wrong with him?"

"What's right with him more like?" she replies. "I know he thinks it's cute having his little nickname and playing up to being the chubby idiot, but you think he'd just get over it and lose some weight already. No one wants to date the fat guy."

Sarah is laughing along and nodding in agreement. But I don't agree. Actually, I feel an inexplicable burst of anger shoot through me. I want to shout Annabelle down, but right now the last thing I need is to fall out with my friends on top of everything else. I decide to quietly dispute her instead.

"I don't think of him as being fat. He's just... cuddly."

I am met with a barrage of squealing from every angle. Annabelle is the loudest. "OOH, so you want to cuddle him do you?!"

"I never said that," I shout in defence. "I just think you're being harsh on him. He's really nice."

"Nice is boring!" she counters instantly. "No one's going to be won over by someone nice. We want cool and sexy, right?"

She looks pointedly to Sarah who is still in high-pitched hysterics. "Right! That sounds way more like it!"

This is so annoying. Chunk is my friend and I don't like the way they're making fun of him like this. But I don't really know how to make them stop without looking like a completely humourless cow. I decide the safest bet is to shift the subject back onto Annabelle.

"OK then, you've got to find this mysterious cool and sexy guy tonight and prove to me he actually exists. I bet if anyone can scout him out then it's you."

"Oh as if," Annabelle answers, waving her hand dismissively. She's acting cool but I can tell that she secretly likes me flattering her. "I very much doubt I'll find the perfect guy in Northcastle, as much as I'd like to."

"Hey, you never know!" Sarah comments with a wink. "Like Ash says, if anyone can find him then you can. It's so unfair, you always get all the guys."

It's not an exaggeration. Annabelle is quite clearly the prettiest of the three of us with her long blonde hair and big blue eyes. I think every single guy in Westerfield is pretty much in love with her. She is very picky about who she chooses to go out with, though. I guess she can afford to be.

I watch on as she looks down at her manicured nails, acting as though this discussion is barely even interesting her anymore. "I'm not that bothered about getting a boyfriend here to be honest. I'd rather wait until I get a job somewhere."

"That's a good point," Sarah answers. "Same here. It's no use getting too attached to anyone here."

I'm suddenly having trouble following the conversation. My two friends are talking but their words don't make any sense to me.

"What do you guys mean?"

Annabelle stares at me blankly. "What do you think we mean Ash?"

I look between her and Sarah in puzzlement. "I don't know. I'm confused." There is a little silence before I keep speaking. "Are you two going somewhere?"

"Probably," Annabelle states bluntly. "I mean, it's not very likely that we're going to find any coaching jobs in Westerfield is it?"

"I... I never thought about it," I stammer in response. "I just assumed you were both staying here after college."

"We might do," Sarah puts in, her tone bright and helpful. "It would be a lot easier to stay local, but it kind of depends where we can get work. It's likely the best paid positions will be nearer London."

Annabelle gives an excited little screech. "Ahh, Sarah we could both end up in London together! That would be so awesome! Plus we'd definitely find cool and sexy guys out and about if we lived there. We'll have to hunt around the same areas when we start looking for work."

"Definitely up for that," Sarah replies joyfully. "Hopefully there will be schools looking for their evening clubs and stuff."

"Babe, it's London! There's bound to be loads! Plus all the rich kids whose parents will pay a bomb for private coaching."

There is so much excited happiness shining right in front of me and I just feel like I've swallowed a stone. I'm sinking further down into my seat as my stomach gets heavier and heavier.

"I'll hardly get to see you guys if you both move to London..." My voice is so tiny that I wonder if they'll even hear me.

"Oh, it won't be for ages yet," Annabelle answers. She sounds so nonchalant, like she doesn't even realise the true weight of what she's suggesting. "We'll be here all over the summer and then it depends on if we can even find anything. Plus don't forget we'll be competing with all the other tennis coaches just out of college and uni so it'll probably take a while."

"How long is a while?" I blurt out. "A week? A month? A year?"

"I don't know," she shrugs. "It depends."

I feel fresh new colour rising to my cheeks. "HOW LONG?! I NEED SPECIFICS HERE!"

Sarah reaches over and pats my shoulder. "Woah, calm down! You must have realised we'd be job hunting soon?"

No. No, I didn't. I thought that Annabelle and Sarah would both get jobs in the local area once they had their coaching qualifications. It never even occurred to me that they would be moving away. But I guess it makes perfect sense now that I think about it. There is only one main school and leisure centre in Westerfield, and both of them have plenty of trained people to give tennis lessons. Everyone getting their qualifications this year will almost certainly have to move out of the area to find business.

Oh my God. Another realisation has just hit me. A horrible, sick-inducing realisation that makes my stomach lurch just thinking about it.

"Wait, do you think Taylor will be moving away too?!"

I look wildly between my friends, desperate for them to give me some kind of hope. Annabelle gives another shrug.

"I don't know. I guess so. I mean, there's nothing much on offer here so he's going to have to."

This can't be happening. Why had I never even thought about this before? Of course he'll have to move away if he wants a decent job. And if he moves away then that means that Benji will go with him.

And then I'll have nobody. Literally nobody. Because it turns out that every single person in my life is leaving me. Taylor, Benji, Annabelle, Sarah. Kieran. Why are they all doing this to me? Did I do something to make them all hate me?

Sarah takes one look at my face and can tell I'm getting upset. She keeps rubbing my shoulder in an attempt to calm me down. "Hey, don't worry about it. Anything could happen, we can't predict the future. We've all actually got to find jobs first."

I'm trying to breathe deeply so I don't cry. Don't cry, don't cry, you can't keep doing this Ash, DON'T CRY.

"And if we do move then you can come see us all the time," Sarah continues. "We'll only be a train ride away."

I nod and smile as though she's just given me the solution to all my problems. But the truth is that I don't feel as optimistic as she obviously does. There are two things you need in order to travel a lot and that's time and money. Sadly, working at The Apple Inn with my family means I don't have much of either. In fact, it's pretty rare for me to get a full day off at all. Today is the first time in two weeks that I haven't been asked to do at least a couple of hours cover. And I think it's only because my parents are feeling sorry for me.

Somehow I push the feelings of dread to one side. I've got to believe we can make this work. They're my best friends. I can't live without them.

"Yeah you're right," I smile, shakily. "I'm sure we'll still see each other all the time. It's just weird to think of you not being here."

"You'll get used to it in no time," Annabelle says, nudging into me playfully. "And anyway, there's always video-chat. I have no doubt that you'll be calling us all the time."

They don't like me calling them now. Will they really want me ringing them up when they're off living a brand new life without me?

"Oh, definitely!" I reply brightly.

Keep it together Ash. Don't think about it. And definitely don't think about Taylor and Benji. You're meant to be having a night out to take your mind off everything, not creating new things to feel bad about.

The train trundles to a halt and a small crowd of teenagers walk into the carriage, all dressed up for a night out. Annabelle peers out of the window at the sign outside.

"We're at Hollowhaven. Two more stops!"

"I can't wait," Sarah trills. "I wonder what this place will be like tonight? Have either of you been before?"

Annabelle answers before I get a chance to. "No, not yet. I think it's kind of rocky."

"Oh cool! I bet it will have some great music."

Just like that, the previous topic is shut down like it was never brought up at all.

And I grin and chatter along, as though my whole life isn't slowly slipping away from me one tiny piece at a time.

---

"Is this it?!" Annabelle is peering intently at the sat-nav on her phone, trying to work out if we've reached our destination. She then looks up at the building directly in front of us. "It's not what I expected, to be honest..."

I don't think it's what any of us were expecting. The place is just a big black door in the middle of the street without any kind of sign around it. Outside there are clusters of people smoking and they all look really intimidating. One guy has a massive tattoo on top of his shaved head and there's a girl wearing the tightest PVC top I've ever seen in my life.

Annabelle tries to push me towards them. "Ash, go ask them if this is the place."

I don't budge against her touch, remaining exactly where I am. "No WAY. They look like they'll stab me!"

"Well, it's your mate who invited us. Can't you text him or something?"

"I don't have his number."

We stand there bickering for a few moments until Sarah takes action and ploughs forward toward the door. "Come on, let's just go in and see."

The groups of tough-looking people all stare madly at us as we head past them and I try to avoid their eyes. I've been to quite a few clubs and gigs before, but they are usually a bit more mainstream than this. Most of the time we just go to cheesy pop clubs. And there are NEVER people like this at cheesy pop clubs.

Sarah bravely opens the door and we step inside to a corridor of bright, vibrant blue. To the right of me is a real life fish tank with tropical fishes swimming around inside. OK, we're definitely in the right place.

Cautiously we head down the corridor and are greeted by a six-foot tall bouncer. He speaks to us in a grunt as he holds out his hand. "IDs."

We all rummage through our bags and purses for our proof of age. I don't drive so I have to take my passport with me everywhere. Going to clubs is basically the only time it ever gets used anyway. I've only ever been to France before on a family holiday. Just another way the whole no time and no money thing impacts my life.

Once the bouncer has scrutinised our IDs, he holds out his other hand. "Six quid."

I can tell that Annabelle wants to grumble about the price, but she doesn't quite dare. Instead, we all obediently hand over our money to the very scary man in front of us. He snatches it off us and then ushers us through another big black door.

The moment we step into the next room we are hit with the sound of electric guitars and a pounding bassline. The music flowing through the speakers is heavy and incredibly loud. In the middle of the room, there is a wild mosh pit with bodies slamming and crashing into each other at full force.

I'm not going to lie. I'm a little bit scared.

"Wow, this is cool!" Sarah shouts above the noise. "Shall we go get a drink?"

I think that Annabelle feels just as wary as I do about being here, but there's no way she's going to let it show. Not if Sarah is acting so fearless. "Sure, let's go."

We weave our way through the crowd, trying to avoid being hit by any of the moshers who keep spilling out onto the outskirts of the room. Everyone here has either a tattoo or a beanie hat or some kind of elaborate gothic dress with bat-wings and a corset. I feel like I'm dressed completely wrong. We must stick out like a sore thumb.

The bar is in a side-room where it's a little bit quieter and less hectic. I'm glad to have a bit of breathing space because the main club is kind of overwhelming. I run my fingers through my hair self-consciously and start to peruse the drinks board on the wall. Then I hear a familiar voice shouting out to me.

"Ash! I thought that was you. Wow, you actually made it! I didn't think you'd turn up."

Chunk comes bounding over to me with a beaming smile on his face. His blondey-brown hair is slicked back into a kind of fifties teddy-boy style and he's wearing a chequed shirt with a bowtie. It's a bold look, but it really suits him. And weirdly, he still seems to fit in with the style of the club, unlike all of us.

"Yeah, I thought I'd stop whinging and come out after all," I joke. I have to talk pretty loudly for him to hear me, my throat is going to kill me in the morning. "Although I feel a bit out of place in this outfit."

I tug at the skirt of Annabelle's dress, accentuating what a poor clothing choice it was for somewhere like this. Chunk just laughs in his usual whole-hearted way.

"What are you talking about? You look beautiful."

How does he always have the perfect comeback for everyone? I can't help but giggle back at him. "I wish! It's Annabelle's dress and I'm about ten inches too short for it." I suddenly realise my friends aren't behind me anymore and look around for them in confusion. "Hang on, she was right here with Sarah. Where did they go?"

Chunk points to the bar where my two besties are ordering drinks and apparently already flirting with a couple of guys beside them. Both of the guys are mega tall and handsome so I don't really blame them.

"Wow, those guys look like models," I murmur aloud.

"That's because they are," Chunk answers with a chuckle. "Well, Raj is anyway. Dev is trying to get into it too but he's kind of struggling."

I gape in surprise. "You KNOW them?!"

There is no way I expected someone like Chunk to be here with a couple of male models. I mean, they're not the type of guys who go hanging around the local Westerfield greengrocer. Well, unless they've come into his shop before when I wasn't there...

OK, I'm so making sure I pop in ALL THE TIME now in case I just happen to bump into them.

Chunk seems a little taken aback by my crazy enthusiasm. "Err yeah, I sort of know them... They're more Jaxon's mates, though."

Oh yeah, I forgot that Chunk had his other friend here too. This Jaxon guy who supposedly went to my school. I still can't remember who on earth he is.

"Oi, Chunky Monky! You talking about me?"

A low, purring voice creeps into the atmosphere and I sense a presence just behind me.

"Jaxon!" Chunk grins. "I am as it so happens. Good timing." He gestures towards me. "This is Ash who I was telling you about."

Slowly I turn around and come face to face with the mystery man behind me. There is so much of him to take in that it takes me a few moments to register the whole picture.

He's tall with thick black hair and two of the most piercing blue eyes I have ever witnessed. There is a little black lip-ring in the corner of his lip and his toned, tattooed arms are bared in a short sleeved tanktop. I think he might be wearing some kind of eyeliner, but it doesn't look girly in any way. He is powerful and magnificent.

"Ash." He says my name with reverence. And then the corner of his lip curls up into a mischievous smile, showing a row of white pointed teeth like a wolf. "I've heard a lot about you."

And just like that, I forget everything that has been worrying me. All the stuff with Annabelle and Sarah feels a thousand miles away. Plus I don't even remember why I was so upset this morning. Was it about a boy or something?

Because right now there is no other boy in the entire universe. Just Jaxon. And he has my full and undivided attention.