Astrid's POV

A week had passed since Hiccup was supposed to come home and both Zephyr and I had been worried sick from the moment we realized he was late. I sat at the head of the dinner table, tears gathering in the corners of my eyes as I forced my quivering pencil to the parchment, where I begun writing a letter to the Chief of the Haven Isles.

Dear Chief Finnur "The Vigorous",

I'm writing to you because we have failed to locate my husband's whereabouts since his departure from the Haven Isles approximately a week from the date I wrote you this letter.

I took a deep, shaky breath as I tried to focus on the task of hand, which was proving to be increasingly more difficult than I had originally anticipated. The weight of the village rested upon my nimble shoulders and if Hiccup didn't come back ... I quickly shook the thought off as I set my focus back on the letter, trying not to think too much about my sleeping daughter in the room above me having to accept that her father was gone, or rather missing.

We hope that you can provide us with more details than what we already know and perhaps even help us in the search for—

My charcoal pencil slipped out of my grip, scratching out the rest of the page as my head was filled with screams of agony, anger and exasperation. My shoulders had been shattered by the heavy weight I had borne and my lungs were crushed by the impact.

I gasped for air, desperately clawing at my throat for just a tiny breath, but it was hopeless. Tears streamed down my cheeks as frantic gasps filled the room. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't think. I couldn't do anything. My body had turned on me, like a viscous pack of wolves that were ripping me to pieces, flesh and bones.

Then, it suddenly stopped. Just stopped. I could breathe normally again, though my cheeks were still stained with tears as my stomach tied itself into a knot, a wave of nausea washing over me as I climbed back up into the chair, in which I had fallen off during my panic attack.

I took a deep breath, salvaging the sweet, precious air that filled my lungs once more and slowly returned completely back to my normal self. I closed my eyes as I rested my head in my hands, heart aching painfully. Where was Hiccup?

I quickly found myself flying right back off my chair though, seeing as mere moments later the front door was suddenly thrown open. A loud yelp escaped me as I missed the chair and tumbled to the floor, somehow managing to hit my head on the surprisingly hard wood.

A grunt escaped me as my hand rapidly found its way to the aching spot at the back of my head, massaging it as I winced at the pain. "Oh my gods! I'm so sorry, Astrid, I really didn't mean to startle you like that!"

The voice similar to that of a honking goose rang through my ears, filling me with a sense of disbelief and a slight hint of anger. I slowly blinked my eyes open and was immediately met by a familiar pair of sparkling, emerald green eyes, which were filled with concern. "Hiccup?"

Before he even got the chance to respond, I threw my arms around his neck, tackling him in my embrace as an immense sense of joy filled me to the brink of tears. "You're back! You're not dead, I thought you were dead!"

Hiccup huffed from where he was pinned beneath me with a mouthful of my braid. The Berkian Chief promptly spit the braid out before he found himself in the process of plucking out loose strands of blonde hair from his mouth. "As you can see, I'm very much alive. I take it I've been missed, then?"

"Of course you have!" A smile stretched across my face, but it quickly faded as I remembered how long he had been gone. "Where were you? You were supposed to get back a week ago! We were worried sick!"

Hiccup blinked, seemingly taken aback by my sudden change in tone. "I was on the Haven Isles, like I told you I would be."

I narrowed my eyes at him as I pointed a finger at him, jabbing it in the middle of his chest as I spoke. "You said you would be there for three days. You said you'd be home by the end of third day! The entire village waited for you!"

"Why are you acting like this? I've been away on longer trips before!" Hiccup defended himself, but I was having none of his shit.

"What is so damn hard about sending a simple terror mail telling us that you're alive and well, Hiccup? Telling us that you've had to extend your stay on the Haven Isles for a few more days?" I snapped as I got to my feet, promptly crossing my arms as I turned away from Hiccup, who was in the middle of getting up from the floor as well.

"Listen, Astrid, I'm sorry I didn't say anything, I know I should've sent you something but I completely forgot. I was just so busy with everything that I—"

The blood was boiling in my veins as a seed of suspicion was planted in my brain and was growing by the second. "You were so busy, huh? What were you so busy with that you couldn't even send us a message saying that you're doing fine so that we wouldn't have to tear ourselves apart with worry for you? What is so much more important than your family?"

I saw it burning in his eyes long before he lashed out at me, that hidden, viscous and deeply concealed temper that he rarely let loose was now clawing at the inside of his mind, begging him to say the things he'd rather keep to himself. "Astrid, enough. You know there's nothing I value more than you and Zephyr."

Unfortunately for the two of us, we shared many similarities, which not only included heavy stubbornness but also a raging temper. The only difference being that as a warrior mine tended to be a bit more bite than just bark. "Admit it!"

Hiccup raised a brow. "Admit what?"

"That you were cheating on me! It's the Haven Isles for Odin's sake! Everyone knows about those women and what they do!" I snarled at Hiccup, who was looking at like I was some madwoman. I noticed Toothless quietly slip out of the house from where he had been sitting beside the door for the past few minutes, clearly not wanting any part in our big fight.

"Gods, I've been gone for 10 days on business and business only and you've gone completely mad!" Hiccup barked, that vicious verbal-lashing building up inside of him as my vision was painted blood-red.

"What did you call me?" I growled dangerously, my hands balling up into fists as I was ready to fight him if need be.

"Mad! I called you completely and utterly batshit crazy for assuming a bunch of dumbass things about a fucking business trip!" Hiccup roared and I had to physically restrain myself not to beat him into a bloody pulp.

"Fuck you, Hiccup!" I spat through gritted teeth.

Judging by the way Hiccup's nostrils flared, I realized I had gone too far. "Fuck me? No, fuck you, Astrid! Fuck you for leaving our daughter. Fuck you for staying away. Fuck you for thinking you knew what was best for us, for all of us. Fuck you for staying with Dagur after we had just gotten you back. Fuck you for bringing us so much pain and fucking sorrow. Fuck you for being a terrible mother to our daughter, fuck you for assuming that I would ever be unfaithful to you and especially fuck you for being an awful wife."

The cat was finally out of the bag and the terrifying whip of insults had been lashed out, leaving red-hot marks on my heart as Hiccup revealed the very worst side of him, the side of him that I despised with everything I had. The worst part wasn't the lashes, no, the worst part was that every single thing he had said was true, just like they'd been the one other time I had been subjected to that part of him. I was a terrible mother and a wife. I had brought them immense pain and sorrow because I had thought that I knew what was best for all of us. Hiccup was right. I was awful and I knew that just as well as he did.

I took a shaky breath as I felt my boiling hot anger bleed into deep sorrow, slowly shaking my head back and forth. "You're right, I'm terrible."

Hiccup said nothing, he merely glared at me with crossed arms and an expression so cold that the temperature of the room seemed to have sunk. At that moment, he didn't regret a single thing he had said, at that moment he was still that awful version of himself that I simply couldn't stand.

I shook my head once more before heading for the door, which Toothless had thankfully closed on his way out, so that we had been spared from a large audience to our big fight. I pushed the door open, letting the cold breeze of the night wash over me as I stuck two fingers in my mouth and let out a loud, sharp whistle.

As I awaited my dragon, I found myself turning back to face Hiccup, who hadn't moved an inch from his previous position. "Hiccup, it's become quite clear that things between the two of us aren't going to work out, which is why I'm leaving. I won't be bothering you or Zephyr any longer. It was nice having the both of you back, if only for a moment."

I picked up the axe that had been leaning against the wall beside the door — my axe — as I watched Stormfly touch down, curiously tilting her head at me as she probably wondered why I had called her over at such an ungodly hour.

Without so much as another word from Hiccup, I shut the door behind me and stepped into the chilly night. I greeted my dragon with a brief nuzzle before I climbed atop her back gently patting her on the side of her neck. "Let's get out of here, Stormfly."