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41. At the altar

Abhi had left them by the side of the road, slipping away and disappearing amidst the horde of people thronging the stores and eateries in the neighborhood. Aditya and Nandini were still reeling from the shock they had just received. An entire year without any knowledge about the other's actual situation. An entire year of despondency, hoping the other was at least happy when in reality, both were in utter melancholy.

Aditya watched a few gossiping women walk by him, using the little strip of space existent between himself and Nandini. Once their giggles died, he glimpsed around, noticing a few passersby with shopping bags in their hands, and AirPods in their ears. Rubbing his palms over his face, he let the truth sink in one more time. Exhaling deeply, he let his arms drop to his sides. "What the fuck, Nandini?" His nose flared in anger, and he ended up screaming. "For one year, I have been so miserable assuming you got married. Why could you not clarify?"

She gasped in indignation since he had attracted the attention of many people, who had their heads craned towards them due to the abrupt nature of the outburst. Losing her patience, she shouted too. "How would I know? Did you tell me? You did not bother to inform me either."

He banged his palm on the pillar behind him. "You had gone AWOL. Nobody knew where you were."

She glared at him. "My address is the same. You could've contacted me. But no! You didn't because you didn't want to."

He rolled his eyes. "I... I... I was bound by a promise. I couldn't have gone to your home."

"There are other ways to contact people as well, you know."

"Oh really?" He sneered, drumming his lips with his finger. "Pray tell, which way exactly are you talking about?"

She fumbled for a moment. "Social media—"

"Which social media handle of yours was active again? Let me see." He pulled out his phone, scrolling through the apps installed. "Facebook account? Deactivated. Instagram account? Disabled. No Snapchat account. No Twitter account. And I am sure you have changed your number."

She crossed her arms in front of her, quirking her brows. "Are you so sure?"

He glanced at his phone, not feeling so certain anymore. He had dared not text her in the last year, fearing she would get into trouble with Shubham while even he didn't wish to break the promise he had made to Piyali. Out of place for a moment, he shoved his phone back inside his jeans pocket as his jaws clenched.

She twisted her lips at his obvious reaction. "If you wanted to, you could have contacted me. Like people in the olden days used to do."

He scoffed. "Write you letters?"

"You knew where I work."

"Oh!" His brows shot up, "So, I should have barged into your office, asking for the one girl who instructed me to stay the hell away from her!"

"I did not say that," she snapped. "I said we should not meet willingly because of the promises we had made to our exes. And even if I had contacted you, I should've said what?" She faked a sweet smile. "Hey, Aditya! I did not get married. Do you want to get married to me?"

He facepalmed himself, not noticing the oodles of attention they had garnered due to their loud and public altercation. The public had gathered near the spot, chuckling at the way they were arguing, some comprehending the language they spoke while others enjoying the banter that seemed more like a lover's spat than a serious matter. Paying no heed to anyone whatsoever, he scowled at her. "You are completely insane, aren't you?"

She let out a sarcastic laugh. "I am insane? For real? You could have told me the truth when you met me at the mall, but you didn't. That's insane."

"Really?" He crossed his arms in front of him. "I should have said what exactly? Hi, Nandini. How are you and your husband doing? By the way, I did not get married. Why don't we run away together?"

She flashed her eyes at him. "You could've proposed elopement, yes, given you were the one who had suggested the very same thing a year back."

"Is this some kind of a joke to you?" He held his head in his hands as frustration bubbled inside of him. "How could you not tell me? You had my phone number. You could have called me up."

"I just told you the reason." She tugged at her hair, exasperated with him. "I assumed you got married, and I didn't wish to break the promise. Were you even listening to me?"

"Oh, you are the most infuriating girl I have ever met, and no, I don't want to listen to you." He groaned, stepping back. "I hate you so much, Nandini Basu."

She gasped yet again, landing a smack on his arms. "I hate you more."

They stood there, bickering and quarreling with each other, just like old times, not apprehending that the base topic of their fight had shifted considerably while providing enough fodder for the crowd, who were busy incessantly clicking pictures and shooting videos of the squabbling duo.

"Albania? Seriously? Where did that come from?" she screamed.

"The same place Venice and Rome came from," he snapped.

"At least, I had a honeymoon planned which I used as an excuse."

"Are you even listening to yourself right now?" He rolled his eyes when she glowered at him. "I had spotted a packet of Albanian Coffee on one of the racks," he mumbled.

A grimace developed on her features. "Sick!"

"Excuse me!" He frowned. "You were the one feigning a visit to Victoria's Secret to surprise your husband. You had no one waiting for you back home."

"You didn't have either." She brushed the stray strands of her hair from her face as they were causing an impediment in her arguing capabilities. "No Piyali at home because she is not your wife."

"Careful there, Vixen." He narrowed his eyes at her. "Choose your next words wisely or you might end up regretting."

She scoffed, laughing like a maniac. "And how do you even know I was feigning a visit to Victoria's Secret? Perhaps I have a boyfriend waiting at home."

"Ah!" He clenched his fists over her shoulders. "Similarly, how do you know I had no one waiting at home? There could have been a girlfriend. Or even a wife."

"There can't be because you are single."

The exhausted and familiar feminine voice echoed in their ears, and the two of them turned to their sides as swiftly as possible to find an ebullient Abhi clapping his hands next to the fatigued Shruti.

***

Abhi and Shruti had tugged the two childish people away from the gathering crowd and pushed them inside the cafe, forcing them to sit together and sort out their differences. As the four of them were huddled around the round table in utter silence, the waiter put four bowls of soups in front of them.

Slurping from her bowl of creamy mushroom soup, Shruti said, "I was immensely angry with whatever happened. That's the reason Abhi and I broke up too."

Nandini gasped at the new piece of information. "You what?"

"Immaterial." Shruti waved her hands in dismissal. "The point is, it took me a long time to garner clarity. Abhi was right." She licked her lips. "You two must have tried hard to avoid falling for each other, but then you did because you couldn't help it. Your mistake was not coming clean in front of your partners. No one likes cheaters, guys. What you did was terrible, but I guess you have suffered enough. So, please, for the love of God, talk to each other and then we can help you fill the gaps in the maze-like story, okay?"

Aditya hummed, glimpsing at Nandini. "Are you willing to talk or do you still have energy left in you to screech and shout?"

Huffing, she fiddled with the hem of her dress. Heaving a deep sigh, she said, "Why did she call off the wedding?"

He picked a spoon and dipped it in his soup. "Funny story, actually." His eyes flickered towards her for a moment before he said, "It all started after we parted at the bridge."

***

A year ago.

If Aditya thought separating from Nandini was the end of his miseries, he was utterly wrong. Piyali was still miffed, not talking to him properly, and had rather moved out of the loft the very next day. She told him she would return only after his heart, mind, and the house would be cleansed off Nandini's memories. He knew it was an impossible feat to achieve, given his very existence revolved around the chubby girl. But he assured Piyali of doing everything in his power to restore the trust and love that was once existent between the couple.

Since her previous apartment was no longer an option to move back into, she went to live with Rishi in the meantime, promising to be back home once the wedding would be done and dusted in the next two months. All her stuff was still in Aditya's place, and he tried to convince her to come back each day, praying and begging, seeking her forgiveness for the mistake he had committed. He couldn't blame Piyali for her refusal to forgive either. No woman should see what she had to on the very day she thought was the commencement of a lifetime of togetherness at home. Their home.

But Aditya didn't give up trying. Leaving sweet messages and voicemails for her each morning, going to meet her at Rishi's every evening, spending their time conversing over random topics, he tried everything he could to bring back the beautiful smile on her face. But she always had the same stoic expression that screamed oodles about how she had lost herself in this vicious game he played with her.

Things continued to be sour between them as she didn't participate in conversations much. She had been supremely excited about the wedding prior to the fateful day, planning every  little detail meticulously and communicating all her needs and wants to the wedding planner in India. However, it seemed like she had lost all interest afterward. Handing over wedding responsibilities to her parents, she continued spending her days remaining quiet and reflecting on the exact moment when her boyfriend fell out of love with her. But she was repeatedly drawing a blank, for she couldn't pinpoint anything with certainty.

One day before the duo was supposed to board a flight to India, Aditya finally noticed a change in her. She was smiling along with him, participating in the discussion about their upcoming wedding, and even giggling at the lame jokes her fiancé had cracked.

Finally, when he dropped her off at Rishi's before dinner—the entire clique of friends had an early flight to catch—she prevented him from leaving with a hold on his wrists.

Her eyes shimmered with unshed tears as she cupped his cheeks. "Please just be mine, Adi. I can't share you with anyone else."

His heart broke at the sight in front of him. The fat drops cascading down her cheeks. The shattered heart she was still nursing. The way her lips trembled and her orbs had a pool of skepticism swirling in them. Pulling her into his warm embrace, he murmured in her ears, "I am all yours."

She sniffled in his chest. "Promise you will only love me."

He exhaled inaudibly. He was ready to promise anything and everything she needed him to. He would never think about the overly cute girl. He would never meet her. But how could he promise to love only Piyali when he knew very well that his affection for Nandini was not a fleeting phase? He was utterly, irrevocably in love with her, and though he was alright spending a lifetime away from her, he was not okay with the idea of not loving her.

"Adi?" Piyali's voice shook as she prompted him when he didn't speak up. "Promise?"

Clearing his throat, he hummed in response.

***

Piyali's mood bettered a whole lot once the two of them reached India for their wedding. Both of them had arrived at a common understanding that the wedding would take place without a hitch and that the families needn't know of the problems they were having with each other.

She was smiling whole-heartedly and blushing like the old times when her cousins teased her during the functions, and even he put up a bright smile as he took part in every activity.

He was content with whatever he had. Finally. He had managed to bring a smile to the girl's face, and he vowed to never let it fade since Piyali deserved nothing but limitless joy.

As she was busy with her cousins, practicing some slick dance moves for the Sangeet function, grinning ear to ear, he heaved a deep sigh and leaned his back against the nearest pillar of the open balcony in the banquet of the resort where the wedding was supposed to be held. Scrolling through his work emails, he didn't notice when Ambika hobbled up to him and placed a hand on his shoulder.

Craning his neck, he beamed. "Thamma! Do you need something?"

A sad smile played on her lips. "I am old, and I have lived my life. Yours has just begun, Adi."

He chuckled. "You are younger than me, and you will outlive me, okay?"

She sighed. "You are not happy. I can see that."

"Thamma, I am—"

"No, you are not." She shook her head, chortling. "You want Nandini. It's very evident with the way you are smiling in such a fake manner. And I know you feel guilty about doing this to Piyali. That's the only reason you are not following your heart, and it pains me."

He pursed his lips, ducking his head to stare at his feet. "Mom told you?"

She nodded. "Sandhya did. She and Abnish know very well that you love her... Nandini... but... but because you wanted this and it was my decision that you marry the girl after the kind of relationship you two have shared," she caressed his hair, "both of them didn't try to talk you out of it."

He exhaled, raking his hand through his hair. "I hurt them both. I hurt everyone."

Ambika's wrinkled face fell when she discerned the mental agony he had been in for a long time. "Do you want to call this off?"

"No." He clicked his tongue. "I want this wedding to go through. I want to make her happy, and I want her to smile the way she did before I broke her heart."

Ambika nodded, biting her lips. "Half the marriages in this country are about compromise and familial expectations. Perhaps the two people involved don't want the life they have, but they have no other option as well." She heaved a deep sigh. "I hope you will not be making a compromise since the very first day."

Once Ambika ambled away, Aditya groaned when Sandhya approached him with the same sad smile on her face as his grandmother had. "Mom," he rolled his eyes, "not you too. Please."

Sandhya shook her head, holding his arms. "I love you so much, son, and I can't see you be in anguish at your wedding. Your father will be furious if you decide to call it off, but I think that would be the right course of action."

His nose flared. "I don't want to call this off. Please leave me alone."

Sandhya sighed and took a pair of bangles out of the golden pouch she was carrying and handed them over to him. "These are your grandmother's. She gifted these to me the day I officially became a part of the family. How about you give these to Piyali on your wedding night?"

He accepted the bangles from her, observing the pair from every angle, noticing how it was made of pure gold, its shimmer giving the fact away. Tiny rubies and emeralds were encrusted along the circumference, placed alternately, with delicate gold tassels swinging from the piece of jewelry with each breath he took. "Cool."

The lack of enthusiasm on his part forced her to speak up. "These seem like a perfect fit for Nandini instead of Piyali."

His head snapped towards her. "What?"

"She completes you in ways Piyali hasn't. You are in love with her in a way you haven't been with anyone else. It's only Nandini whom you can love, and going through with this wedding will hurt Piyali throughout her life. Choose wisely, son."

***

His mother's and grandmother's words rang in his head throughout the ceremonies carried out to honor the occasion. Though his blushing bride was seemingly back to her original self, giggling and beaming, posing for photos with him, half his mind was on what Ambika and Sandhya had said to him.

He wouldn't admit it to anyone, but Ambika's stern insistence that Aditya marry Piyali had been burdening him since the night of his parent's anniversary party where he had introduced Piyali as his friend while Ambika had gauged the sexual aspect of their relationship. Now when Ambika had told him that she was willing to overcome her prejudices if it meant happiness for him, his heart was no longer burdened with anything other than the thought of keeping Piyali happy. Something that stemmed from the bottom of his heart.

However, the bangles sitting inside the pocket of his sherwani had a different tale to tell. They were apparently a perfect fit for the only woman he was in love with, and he yearned to gift the jewelry to Nandini. As the possibility of that ever happening dwindled with each passing moment, his mood dampened too.

The ceremonies went by in a blur, and he could barely recall anything at all. Piyali had most certainly enjoyed every bit of the wedding functions, but he was not sure why there was a jumble of thoughts clouding his mind. Ambika's sad smile, Sandhya's feeble attempts to ask about Nandini's wedding which he ignored, Nandini's beatific smile, Piyali's good mood, his family's reputation in front of the media and the Mehras, Piyali's insistence that he only love her and no other girl, the immense amount of love he had for Nandini, and the sweet moments he shared with her played with his senses until he was rendered breathless.

He didn't even notice when his sister came inside the room at the resort, forced him to wear the cream-colored wedding attire, and Samarth escorted him to the altar where the wedding was supposed to take place. He didn't even discern when Piyali arrived at the spot in her purple lehenga, melodies playing in the background as people hooted and whistled as his bride advanced towards him.

When the priest asked him to take a drop of the holy Gangajal and wash his hands with it, he finally took note of the pious flames raging in front of him, Piyali now stepping towards the altar and blushing heavily, and the way both the families were too jubilant with the matrimony. "I... I... I need to talk to Nandini."

Soumya, who was standing next to his sitting form, heard him, and her smile faltered. She glimpsed between her brother pining for another woman and his bride holding her lehenga up to come up the stairs of the majestically decorated altar. Leaning towards Aditya, she said, "It's your wedding. Snap out of it."

The sternness in his sister's tone didn't deter him as he sprang upright, surprising everyone with the sudden action. Even Piyali halted in her steps, peering at him questioningly while her frown deepened, surmising the shift in his demeanor. He shut his eyes tight, took two deep breaths, and strode up to his bride. "I need to clear this before the wedding. I love you, Piya. I really, really do, but it's not how I love Nandini."

Piyali's frown lines cleared, and her lips thinned into a line. She glimpsed around herself, noticing the confusion popping on the faces of her and Aditya's family members because the groom was visibly distressed and talking in hushed whispers with the girl. She also overheard murmurs of the relatives, discussing amongst themselves if all was good between the duo. Glowering at him, she said, "Thanks for letting me know. Can we please get this done? It's our wedding day, Adi."

He raked his hands through his hair as shallow breaths escaped his mouth. "I will give you everything you want in this marriage. No questions asked. I am never meeting her again. Period. I will be yours for the rest of our lives. Period. We will be happy. We will have a family. A home. But... but I can't promise to only love you. I... I love her. I love her the most in the world, Piya. Please don't make me promise something I won't be able to deliver on."

She gaped at him without blinking her eyes, her lips drooping as the delicate demeanor of a bride vanished from her body language.

"Enough, Adi," Soumya said from behind him, eyeing the priest and the guests in tandem. "You are hurting her with your words and actions."

He held Piyali's henna-clad hands in his tight grasp, his palms lacerating under the sharp pieces of the bangles she had worn. "Please, Piya. Free me from that one demand of yours. I have already lied to you enough. I don't wish to do so anymore. Not when we will be married."

Her lips trembled, and fat drops of tears threatened to roll down her cheeks. "You had to ruin the most important day of my life, didn't you?" When he remained silent, she clicked her tongue. Sniffling, she said, "Go and do whatever the fuck you want. Who am I to stop you?"

"No, that's not what I..." He exhaled deeply. "That's not what I meant."

Soumya tugged at her brother's arms and snapped at him. "What sort of drama are you creating? Everybody is getting concerned with this behavior of yours. We need to get started with the rituals."

"Wait!" Piyali chuckled, rolling her moistened eyes. "Let it be, Soumya Di. He is not over her. He can never be."

He hung his head low.

Realization finally dawned on her. The man in front of her would never be the man she once fell in love with. He had changed in ways she couldn't comprehend. His heart had shifted, and she was nowhere close to being the woman he loved with all his heart. Perhaps she didn't have the courage earlier or probably she hoped for things to get better with time because of which she stalled the decision, made the wrong choices. Perhaps she should've done this eons ago, but the blind love she had for him prevented her from steeling her heart and walking away from him with her head held high.

But she had had enough. Her dignity, her self-respect, and her emotions weren't so invaluable for her to suffer through a marriage she knew the outcome of. She had to clench her trembling fingers and wriggle out of his hold. "Have a good life, Aditya." She dabbed at the corners of her eyes, sniveling. "May we never meet again."

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