his usual sacrifices

i was taught that i deserved such love.

(Aleksander)

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─────────────── Months later.

"The penalty of multiple accounts of fraud, laundering is a fine of..." the judge reads through the list of crimes as I stared fixedly at the pale expression of Eldrick Illiades, waiting for the court's verdict upon him.

I had anticipated this day and this moment for the longest time, albeit with a heavy heart that I wasn't situated in the courtroom with the person who most deserved to be here with me. I was alone at the front of the courtroom, while Aillard, Naya, Ismael, and Jeremiah were seated in the front row of the spectators.

The judge continued, "Finally, the penalty of first-degree murder and attempted murder is life without the possibility of parole."

The judge lifted the gavel and hit it against the wooden panel to mark the end of this court hearing. The courtroom was quieter than usual and I continued to look at Eldrick Illiades who had turned towards me with hatred brimmed in his eyes. He looked straight at me, before adjusting his gaze towards the bump that I carried with me to this courtroom today. Out of maternal instinct, I wrapped my arms around my unborn child and watched as the prison officer pulled him out of the courtroom.

I wasn't going to lie about the fear that I felt and that my entire self was trembling. I closed my eyes and tried to regulate my breathing when I felt my baby stir within me, as though feeling my unease. From behind, a concerned voice sounded, "Wren, you okay darling?"

I choked out a laugh, "I might need some help getting up. I almost couldn't feel my legs now."

"Don't worry, I've got you, precious," Ismael stepped towards me and held me up by supporting me.

I was almost clinging onto him for my dear life because I couldn't stand up on my own at all. While I had imagined all the scenes that could happen today, I hadn't expected myself to appear so pathetic at the end of this entire court hearing. My hands held firmly onto Ismael, as Naya supported me by holding onto the back of my waist. I didn't forget to look towards the last person who came to this courtroom with me today, I called, "Aillard."

He stood rooted in his position when the Fayed siblings came forward to help me up. Since knowing Aillard, I came to realise that this man often couldn't hide his thoughts. I saw worry, fear, excitement, and gratitude written all over his expression. I said, "I did it."

He was stunned for a moment, before he gasped, "You did it, little birdie."

We had grown close to each other from the few months of working together to fight this case. It was months of sleepless nights, multiple cups of caffeine on his end and naggings on me to never forget my pregnancy checkups at the hospital. I was doubtful at first when he approached me for help, but I only realised that this man had no greed for power and wealth. All he wished for was a simple life and the ingenuity of the people around him — even Grecia, Osbert and Holden warmed up to him after a few weeks when he arrived at the household.

A bubble of happiness suddenly erupted before I stretched my hand out to him and chirped, "Come on, let's all go home."

He looked at my opened palm with shock, a little unsure whether to take it until he checked on the Fayed siblings and they nodded in affirmation. He finally took my hand and we went back to the household together to deliver the good news to the folks at home. The celebration at night was simple but everyone at the table shared a lifted spirit that had never existed within the walls of the Illiades and I had never felt such a sense of fulfilment before.

Late into the night, I was still at my desk to write the report for today's court hearing before I heard a sigh at my door, "Why aren't you resting at this hour again?"

I turned around and saw my partner-in-crime with hands akimbo, standing angrily at my doorstep. Sometimes, if I didn't look too carefully, they resembled one another like a carbon copy. My heart would skip a beat but those butterflies would disappear when realisation finally hit me. Swallowing all the disappointment, I laughed, "Aren't you awake too?"

"How can we be the same?" Aillard frowned.

I laughed even louder this time, "Don't be angry anymore and come in, I have something that I would like to talk to you about."

Aillard hesitated for a moment but entered the room eventually. He settled on the couch nearest to my desk and asked, "What is it, little birdie?"

I dug through the mess of papers on my desk and finally found the yellow document bag that was buried within it. With a heavy heart, I said, "I need you to hand this to him."

Aillard didn't dare to take the bag of documents from me, only looking towards me before he stammered, "H-How did you know?"

"I overheard your phone call with him the other day," I admitted.

I always knew that they kept in touch with each other, and Aillard would throw a whole entire list of questions to ask if he needed anything, if he wanted anything, if he had been taking care of himself and so on. Yet, the other end only had a single question, "How has she been?"

I knew he didn't leave because we fell out of love, which was why my heart shattered even more. He left because he didn't have faith in me, in us, as much as I wished he had.

Aillard panicked, "W-Wren, I didn't mean to—"

"Thank you for not telling him about this little boy," I interjected, rubbing against the swell of my abdomen. "I would want him to hear it first from me."

Aillard fell silent for a moment, receiving the bag of documents from me before he said, "Of course, I knew it would be best to hear such lovely news himself. I wanted to tell you about it another day, but you caught me first."

"Alek was never good at keeping secrets from me," I poked fun.

I was in the living room, reading a book when Lex suddenly got up and looked towards the main door. The doorbell rang and I frowned, remembering that today wasn't the usual delivery date and I hadn't made any purchases to date. I went to the door with Lex and saw from the monitor that it was Aillard outside the door, looking slightly nervous.

Without hesitation, I pulled on the door and asked, "What is it?"

I looked behind him, and there was just his car parked on the porch without a sight of a bunch of people that might be from Eldrick. I asked again, "You came alone?"

Aillard nodded and enquired, "Can I go in?"

"We're not friends nor family," I rejected. "You came here uninvited."

Aillard exhaled a sigh, "It's about Wren, just let me in to talk."

At the first notice of the name, I stood aside and let him in. Aillard didn't waste time before he placed a thick yellow document bag on my coffee table and said, "She knew that we had been in contact, so she had requested me to hand this to you."

"How did she find out?"

Aillard rolled his eyes a little and lamented, "Apparently, the two of us aren't good at keeping secrets from her."

Seeing how Aillard reacts to Wren, the unease in my chest knotted into a mess. It was all the signs that showed that they got along with each other. I looked towards the heavy document bag for a long while before I finally opened it up to reveal its contents.

It was a thick folder and I flipped to the first page and was surprised by what I saw. It was a thick report detailing a court case, and the offender's name was my birth parent — Eldrick Illiades.

Flipping through the pages, it was report after report of the crime he had accumulated in his damned life: First-degree murder of Selene Findlay, multiple accounts of fraud and laundering, and so on. I only stopped when I saw a report of me: Attempted murder of Aleksander Illiades. These reports were not simply done in those few months of my absence. They were accounts that had been documented from the very beginning, with evidence dated from many years ago. Wren even knew about my identity from the beginning, that I had been coerced into a false identity. She had everything listed so clearly that I was stunned by how long she had planned this for.

It took me a long while before I moved on to read about the happenings of that day. It described even to the finest details of what happened in the court that day, of how Eldrick Illiades appeared with his attorney and to the background of his appointed attorney. Even though, it was written without emotions described, I could feel the heaviness that weighed in her words when she found an excuse as to why I was absent from court.

My client, Aleksander Illiades was unable to attend the court hearing without a legal identity.

Finally, when I reached the verdict, my heart sank when I should be feeling happy. This was the ending that I had anticipated on Eldrick for the longest time. When those few words of 'life imprisonment with no possibility of parole' appeared right in front of my eyes, I knew this was Wren's way of telling me that she was utterly disappointed in me.

As much as I dreaded to flip to the last page of the thick folder, I did it to punish myself for the mistake that I had made. It was a legal birth certificate with my name printed on it, a photograph of an ultrasound scan and a medical report of a fully formed, healthy fetus. There was a note attached to it, with a few words scribbled:

When I first learned about him, I had decided that Caleb would be a good name, what do you think?

I looked up towards Aillard, and he sighed, "I told you from the beginning that she would know."

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