intertwined desires

i always knew your love was wicked from the way my heart trembles at your presence whenever you're close. at first, it all felt like a haunting feeling but i came to realise that it wasn't much so. 

when i welcome the thoughts of you inside my body, you opened my ribcage and tended the flowers in my heart to bloom. in your embrace, light shone through — like how the dark clouds dispersed, after the rain falls.

something about you made me feel a little more alive and far less lost. perhaps because you understood my heart even in silence when you offered your luminosity and were never afraid of my tenebrosity. i'm perpetually drowning, unable to breathe through the wretchedness accumulated from all the loss and grief. yet, no matter how deep i sunk, it's funny how you refused to let go of the grip you had on me. 

whenever it stormed, you always reminded me: just like every other season, this too shall pass.

(i told you to let go. but, please, don't let me go.)

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I wasn't quite sure where did all my bravery came from but I was inching into Aillard's touch and a strange curling sensation hit my lower stomach. Without processing, my body seemed to recognise every single feel of him because my head was growing hazy and my ability to think was dulling. Maybe I didn't even want to think because I wanted him and all of him the moment his lips brushed tentatively, in unhurried sweeps against mine. 

A soft mewl sounded from the back of my throat and I could barely recognise that sound as my own. Instead of embarrassment, I was feeling all satisfied when I was rewarded with a growl of frustration that rumbled from deep within Aillard's throat. It sounded strangely animalistic and my body trembled when I was much more aroused than before. If he was to touch the right place, he would understand how wet I was for him. The slickness was growing uncomfortable and I writhed beneath him, almost begging for him to relieve me from the scorching heat that burned my insides. I panted, "Aillard, I want—"

"This?" he exhaled against my ear and his hands went straight to my place of need between my thighs.

The gasp I held at the tip of my tongue quickly turned into a cry that roused my self-consciousness. I flipped myself around, unsure why I wanted to escape from his predatory claws and the overwhelming flutter of my own heart that was beating relentlessly wild in my chest. I was yearning for him too deeply, till darts of fear shot through my veins. However, there was no way I could escape. Aillard circled his arm around my waist and pulled me back, pushing my back against his front as he whispered into my ear with dangerous tension, "Running away already, my little songbird?"

"Aillard," I whimpered, fisting my hands into the soft sheets beneath me when he slipped through the skimpy piece of lace that hugged my waist and dragged his finger down the centre of me. His touch was light, taunting and I felt the tip of his finger prodding against my entrance but with no intention of entering me. I squirmed and my hands lost their strength to support my upper body and I fell against the soft sheets weakly. I couldn't think past the haze of arousal in my head and couldn't articulate a single word other than his name. My hips moved on their own, riding against his palm until he removed his hand and pushed my hips down to the bed. A complaining moan escaped my lips at the sudden loss of sensation.

Behind me, his head dipped together with his body and caught the tender skin of my shoulder between his teeth. The rawness of the pain from his sharp bite left me shivering and every sense within me were near imploding when he exhaled huskily, "You woke the demon, angel. You're responsible for lulling it back to sleep."

Aillard pinned me flatly on the bed with his weight and his fingers worked nimbly to slip every piece of clothing off me. I was fully bare when he turned me around and straddled atop of me. My hands gripped on the hem of his sweatshirt and he immediately understood what I wanted when he tugged his top off him. Even in the dimness of the room, I could see how tight his abs were and his muscles rippled with every movement of his. I swallowed but my throat grew drier and more constricted instead. My gaze went straight to where he strained against the cotton material of his joggers. His length was impressive, leaving very little to the imagination. I must have been staring too intently and a rough chuckle sounded from Aillard, "Not so soon, angel."

He removed his weight off me and supported me up, only to push me further into the bed. He guided himself to my lips and his kiss was sublime, explosive and my heart was hammering against my chest so loudly that I could feel each beat against my eardrums. I was drowning against the feel of him as I continued to angled myself into his kiss. 

I had no intentions to kiss him gently, none of that soft and searching nonsense. I claimed him with a kiss so wild, unchecked and unleashing. Each stroke of my tongue against him was demanding and I was telling him all the words that I didn't get to say for the past three years. My restraint snapped, in the same manner, I broke the tether Aillard kept on himself. He backed away a moment later only to set my desires ablaze when he left me in the middle of his bed and upon a sitting position. His hand palmed my centre, his fingers teasing along the wetness gathered and in a low voice, he coaxed, "Your legs."

I had zero resistance when it came to him. When he spoke his request so tenderly, I couldn't help but parted my legs. He pushed my ankles farther apart with his hands and my back arched off the cushioned headboard when he trailed kisses down the length of my body — against the hollow of my clavicle, between my cleavage and down to my navel. His palm rested against my stomach to press me back against the headboard and he kissed me where I needed him the most. Words were stolen from my tongue when his tongue did things I didn't think were possible. My fingers disappeared between the short strands of his dark hair and I tugged on them gently as I gasped, "Aillard—"

The intimate kiss spun my senses and I kicked my head back, moaning softly in pleasure against each steady delve of his tongue. When he slipped his finger through my wetness, my whole body buckled to every sensation he pumped into me. He went deeper, harder until I came undone with blazing heat pouring through me. I was panting hard, breathing in an almost erratic manner and he pulled back, kissing my inner thigh before he rose in front of me. Aillard pulled me by the nape of my neck and rained soft kisses along my jaw and my cheek. Then, he turned me to face me directly while combing strands of my hair away from my face. He continued to sear me with his liquid gaze from those perfect grey eyes and I rolled my lower lip between my teeth as I stared at him, wanting more.

"Wren, if you keep looking at me like that—" I wasn't even going to listen further as I pushed myself off the headboard and he staggered back at the sudden force. I went to grab onto the band of his joggers and one firm pull, I freed him, wrapping my hands around his length. He was sitting too straight for me to be able to reach his lips properly so I kissed his neck, and I worked my hands in the same rhythm as I landed each kiss down the length of his neck and down his body.

When he got his chance to process my suddenness, I already covered my mouth over the tip of his arousal and my tongue swirled teasingly to elicit a low groan of pleasure from him. He carefully held onto my jaw and rocked his hips slowly, guiding himself deeper into my mouth. A moment later, he stopped moving and pleaded, "Wren, stop, please."

I stopped and leaned back against the headboard again. My eyes never left him and once again, I spread my legs apart.

I said I wasn't giving up until I could claim the tiger and his lair.

I'm damned. The words sounded so loud in my mind but I couldn't even find the breath to exhale the word audibly. It's ridiculous, absolutely ridiculous of how my heart, my body and my soul was yearning so painfully for her. I moved slowly to close the distance between us, my eyes never left hers as I observed her slowly. Wren really knew how to draw me in with those alluring bedroom eyes and she was right — she was perfecting her hunt.

"Wren," I murmured her name in hushed tones, my hand smoothing up the length of her thigh. My touch was gentle and I wanted to savour every feeling of her, she was definitely reacting to me because I felt the satisfying amount of moisture that pooled between her thighs. Soft sounds escaped her lips and I caught them with mine. I pressed my body close to her, my own arousal was almost killing me with the heat and hardness I felt.

She was breathing erratically and when she wrapped her hand around my length again, a groan of pleasure escaped me. I was always at her mercy and I wasn't sure why she always wanted me to lose control around her. I had never actually heard of a saint that never feared sins, never knew that angels could also embrace a devil. Wren exhaled breathlessly, "I want you in me. Aillard, now, please."

Unable to fight against her any longer, I tightened my grip on her waist and crashed my lips against her. I had her on my hold as I went towards the nightstand to grab a foiled pack. My body was moving at a pace faster than my brain was processing my thoughts and emotions. I rolled the condom on with impressive haste and she seemed scared that I would back out all of a sudden when she quickly pushed against my chest and pinned me down on the bed. Wren lowered herself against my length and I cursed at the tightness clenching onto me so tightly, "Fuck."

She was panting were laboured as she stilled for a moment to adjust to my size. I reached to hold her cheek against my palm, smiling at her, I cooed, "Look at me, Wren."

There wasn't a single hesitation when her eyes searched for mine. The sheen of tears was illuminating the pale of her eyes and I saw relief speckling in multiple hues of blue. I was dying to move but she deserved more than any recklessness I was going to snap into. I wanted her, tenderly and affectionately. I wanted her, only when she allowed me to. Wren stared at me for quite a long moment before those faint pink lips parted and she sniffled, "Aillard, I missed you. I missed you so much."

"I know," I responded softly, my thumb skated across the round of her cheek. Honesty wasn't my colour but she painted them across my heart with each brush of her fingertips against my skin. I couldn't resist when I confessed, "I missed you too, so please don't cry. You cannot break my heart like that, my little songbird."

I pulled her down and wrapped my hands firmly around her body, I was almost at my limit when she murmured softly, "You can move."

And I did. I started slow, but eventually, my movements became faster and less restrained, almost jerky and unhinged. I felt engulfed, and she was the one devouring me in whole. 

"It's been a while for me," I groaned. "I don't know how long I can last."

"It's okay," Wren responded, pressing herself closer to me.

We moved against each other with unrestrained passion, and in that moment of us, the world didn't matter. It fell away, leaving only the soft moans of hers and the rougher ones of mine until the tension within us came undone in the most beautiful manner. She breathed slowly and asked, "If I want you, can you be mine?"

I'm only ever yours, Wren.

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a/n:

let go and i'll hold you up
so pull me tight and close your eyes
oh, my love, side to side
(this is how you fall in love - jeremy zucker, chelsea cutler)