https://youtu.be/eMjv98XUhi4

NOTE: DON'T MISS THIS SUPER SPECIAL AUDIOBOOK RECORDING! To all audiobook listeners new and old! Make sure to check out the recording for this chapter! Not only will it make your reading experience so much more emotionally intense and make the chapter last longer, you'll get to hear a special song by Kristen! kaelking12 wrote and performed an original song on electric guitar for the recording this time! Check it out at the end of the audiobook recording! Also featuring music by Ellie Goulding, Fleetwood Mac, S. Carey, Sundara Karma, Ben Howard, and Kristen M!

Alex

I wake up from a dream that doesn't feel like one. The kind where reality and make believe trade places and leave me stuck somewhere in the middle. It's been happening a lot more lately.

Elias was at the center of it again-just like he's been in the center of everything lately. But I guess a week of barely seeing someone will do that to you.

Absence has a funny way of working itself into your mind, taking the shape of whoever you're missing, and then plastering reminders of them all over the inside of your head.

If a doctor were to crack open my brain right now he'd find images of Elias lining my skull thicker than a sixteen year old's collection of boy band posters. The old him would've been tickled pink that I even said something like that but that was before.

The new him is different.

Quieter.

There but not there.

With smiles that barely reach his eyes.

But anyway, back to my dream.

In it, Elias is holding me. We're caught up in his sheets, under his blankets, tangled up in each other like we used to be. His warmth should be everywhere. His hands should be hot against my skin. But the heat doesn't reach me. Instead, I'm filled with a hollow cold that starts in my stomach and slowly spreads across my body until I'm covered in it.

Elias's warmth disappears from me, and everything else disappears from me until I find myself here.

Alone in a bed that's starting to feel less and less like home.

Maybe it never was.

The front door creaks open and the earthy smell of Indigo's Fair Trade coffee sneaks under the covers and invades my nostrils. In about thirty seconds, she'll be sitting on the edge of my bed with a cup of so-organic-it's-undrinkable coffee in one hand and a bag of sand pastries in the other.

She buys these inedible delights at the local farmer's market and they're probably the secret to long life, but they taste like gluten-free cat litter.

Don't get me wrong, I love Indigo more than certain members of my own family. She's been one of the only reasons that I've been able to hold on to my sanity since me and Elias's lives went to hell in a hand basket.

Every morning she's started a "return to normalcy" routine in hopes of eventually getting me back to being the girl who wasn't scared of going to class. Or Bruin Cafe. Or a five-step radius outside of my room.

But no amount of coffee and pastries will change the reality of where I am right now. Lost in myself. Lost in my relationship. Lost in a school I don't feel like I belong in anymore.

"Wakey-wakey, free range eggs and no-cruelty bakey."

Eggs and bacon? So much for the return to normalcy plan. If she's going non-vegan, the zombie apocalypse must've started. Scary-end-of-the-world-fact.

I peel myself out of the covers and find her sitting on the edge of my bed gingerly holding a styrofoam takeaway box in her hands. She looks green in the face. Indigo's the kind of person who makes a point to avoid meat-eaters and general areas where she could possibly become even slightly aware of animal suffering.

If I'm in a steak or salami kind of mood, I'll eat it before I get home and wash my hands so she can't smell any of the "murder" on my fingers. Since we moved in to this sad excuse of a dorm together, our room is and has always been a meat-free zone-until about thirty seconds ago.

I reach out and take my breakfast away from her before the bacon makes her sicker than she already is.

"Indigo, why did you-wait-there's an Elias-crazed-firing-squad waiting outside for me, isn't there?" I ask, half-joking.

Indigo clicks her tongue behind her teeth and shakes her head full of newly braided hair. She spent the last two days individually styling every last strand of her hair into the stunning waterfall of braids she's rocking now. Meanwhile, I haven't brushed or washed my hair in who knows how long so if life goes on this way, I might actually beat Indigo in the race to dreadlocks.

Fact.

"No. On the contrary, it's relatively paparazzi-free downstairs right now so eat quickly, soul sister. The sooner you finish breakfast and get ready, the sooner we can begin our journey."

"What journey?"

"Consume your meal of suffering first. We'll discuss the details later."

Indigo motions me to start my meal before rising off my bed and returning to her own. I take her advice, pop open my food box, and shovel a forkful of scrambled eggs into my mouth. They taste like sponge parts.

"Indi, did this come with any salt or pepper or anything?"

She stares at me, her eyes, two flat lines in the middle of her head.

"Garnishing the bodies of the unborn is barbaric, Alex. I specifically hunted down a restaurant in the area that kept a meal like this as humane as possible."

Which means no salt or pepper. Great.

Take it for the team, Alex, take it for the team.

"Sweet. I'm all for humanity or humaneness or whatever. Who needs condiments anyway?"

I wash down my scrambled sponge pieces with a mouthful of unreasonably bitter coffee, but force myself to keep a straight face. Indigo notices details like a military spy so she'll know if I-

"You hate it, don't you?" She asks.

"Kind of, okay, yes. But it was really thoughtful of you to pick this up for me. Thanks for everything, Indi. How'd you know that I missed-"

"A typical high-cholesterol filled American consumerist conditioned breakfast? It shows. As do other things."

Her perceptiveness slices me in half like a concentrated laser beam but I ignore the Elias-related ache in the center of my chest, and change the subject.

"So what adventure were you talking about earlier? Did you find a new holistic grocery store in Westwood for us to sneak off to?" I ask.

Indigo crosses her legs, assumes her morning meditation position, and lets out a long sigh.

"I found a solution to the darkness that has pervaded this room."

And right when you think you understand someone, they throw you for a loop. #IndigoEveryday.

"Darkness meaning?"

"Meaning the abyss that's been slowly consuming your soul ever since the chaos within was unleashed. Even my organic sage can't clear this aura, Alex, and organic sage clears all. Desperate times call for desperate measures."

I wilt a little. Some small delusional part of me was hoping that Indigo hadn't picked up on the downward spiral that I've been in, but there are no secrets with her. She knows everything about me-even the things I don't want her to, but somehow she's still okay with me.

I guess that's what a best friend is. Having someone who's okay with seeing your ugliest moments whether you like it or not.

"Indigo, I'm-"

Not okay.

"-I'll be fine, I just need-"

Him. I think.

"-time to process everything that's going on."

Indigo finishes her last round of "Ohms" and then stands up off her bed. She re-ties the knot on the side of her blue-green sarong and slips into the new pair of hemp flip flops Ryker handmade for her. She's luckier than she knows.

I'd give anything to have what her and Ryker do. Ease. Simplicity. Privacy. But that's not my life anymore. I don't know if it ever was.

Indigo grabs an oversized sunhat out of the closet to complete her outfit and then points towards the door.

"The time has come. Let's journey to a place of processing and un-processing. A place far away from the noise and lights of this La La Land of the lost. A mecca for wandering souls."

"Are we going to the movies?" I ask.

She rolls her eyes.

"Follow me, Alex. Out of the cave and into the sun. Your solution awaits. But, first, a shower. I'm all for going eau naturale, but even I think this calls for sulfate-filled shower sud power. Off we go."

***

A half an hour later, Indigo and I are stuck sitting on the freeway out of Los Angeles towards Ventura County. Rows of taillights line the road in front of me as I stare out the passenger's side window. I breathe in a mouthful of asphalt and exhaust just to overpower the familiar smell of Indigo's car.

Somewhere underneath her incense and heavy hippy musk, I catch the scent of the ocean. The clean mix of Sandalwood and Old Spice Elias wore on the weekend we drove down to San Diego together.

We were on the run then too.

From Caleigh and Tanner, from LA, from everything.

Like we always seem to be.

I shut my eyes and suddenly I'm back in the car next to Elias, carefully crawling our way further south one mile after the other. The radio's blaring in time with the nervous tapping of his fingers against the steering wheel. He was so panicky that day. Every stoplight rattled him, every merge, every lane change. But as on edge as he was, he had a buzz about him that his anxiety couldn't shake.

This raw, reckless excitement that usually comes with the hope of a new chance. A new start. New possibilities. And even though I was still holding back so many secrets from him, I felt it too. I believed in the potential of us being us again. Maybe even better than we were before.

That's the thing about Elias that's easy to love.

His hope's as contagious as his heart.

And I miss it.

I miss him.

But missing him is against the rules.

The invisible rules I've made to help myself survive this temporary separation and the rules that Lisa's forcing me to follow.

Currently, Lisa runs about 70% of Elias's life and has a 30% stake in mine. She usually calls me around this time to give me an update on how bad the situation has become since Elias and my relationship went public. The thing is, I don't need her to tell me how bad things are. I'm living it.

I'm living with the fact that my parents found out about the most painful decision I ever made in my life via a tabloid-shared post. I'm living with the fact that I'm grieving my son for the second time and I can barely see or talk to his father about it. I'm living in the middle of a hurricane and I just want out.

I want a day without rain and I hope to God that Indigo's car can drive fast enough and far enough to outrun the storm.

"Any song requests, Mademoiselle Mute? This junkyard hero can actually handle an iPod hook up believe it or not," Indigo asks.

She hands me her scratched up MP3 player which could easily find a home in the natural history museum given how old it is.

"That depends. Let's see if your music taste is as cool as you are," I say as I scroll through the playlists on her black and green screen.

Nirvana pops into view but I skip over their songs when I remember the look on Elias's face when Kurt Cobain's lyrics hit a little too close to home.

"Nice! You're a Foo Fighters fan too?!" I say a little too enthusiastically when I stumble across their greatest hits album.

Indigo lets out a ghost of a laugh and eyes me like I look as crazy as I sound.

"I am. Does having bands in common with people normally excite you this much or is it a Dave Grohl thing?"

"No. Sorry, it's just that there was this one time last year where I got stuck in the car with Elias and he was totally pre-judging me because he thought I looked like a Carly Rae Jepsen fan. I totally made him eat his words when I put on The Pretender. He was so into himself back then that he thought he was right about everything so you can imagine the look on his face when I lipsynced the song better than he did. That was a crazy day-one of many with him I guess."

Indigo doesn't say anything for a while, she just stares out over the dashboard at the incoming view of the Ventura coastline. Maybe if I was a normal person I'd feel less awkward about silences like these, but given the fact that I just went on a memory monologue about my semi-estranged boyfriend, I feel about as comfortable as an upside down turtle.

"I'm proud of you, Alex," Indigo says out of nowhere.

I wring my hands together in my lap.

"For what, exactly?"

"For finally talking about him. It's been a whole week and I haven't heard Elias's name come out of your mouth once. Unless you're sleeping. Looks like your subconscious makes up for all of your Elias-less daytime conversation."

My whole face flushes. Note to self-add duct taping my mouth shut to my nightly routine.

"What? That doesn't even make sense because I don't even dream about him half of the time-"

And there you go, Alex, lying again.

"-it's probably because of all of the stress him and I are going through. It's not like I'm having trouble with the whole minimal contact thing. I'm fine. Dream Alex is crazy. Ignore her. Please."

Indigo deadpans me from across the car.

"The sages say, dreams are the songs of a lonely soul. It's okay to miss him, Alex. It's okay to think about him, and talk about him, especially if you're hurting."

I don't know if it's Indigo's tone or me being at the end of my rope but my eyes start burning and my lips start quivering in that stupid way that essentially guarantees that you're in for a breakdown.

I've successfully been able to only have them when Indigo hasn't been in the room. I'd like to keep it that way. I suck in a shaky breath and try my best to make it through a feeble attempt to explain myself.

"I know. It's just-talking about him sucks because I-I'm feeling a lot of different things about him right now and most of those things are conflicting and terrible. Basically, love sucks. It's horrible because it doesn't go away or stop when you want it to. It doesn't let you sleep or dream good dreams. It just leaves me hopeful and hopeless and confused and heartbroken all at the same time. But hey, according to Lisa feelings are bad for PR, so who needs feelings?! Not this girl."

I'm shouting. And sweating, and crying all at the same time. This- is an all time low. I'm sitting across from my best friend who is the picture of serenity, and peace, and solid relationships, while I act like an emotional psychopath. But that's what my relationship has turned me into. Or maybe it's the lack of said relationship no thanks to Lisa.

When she first suggested the whole separation thing, I thought space would be good for us. I understood what she was saying. How it was supposed to work. So when Lisa dropped the whole "No Contact" rule I tried to look at the bright side of it.

I tried to convince myself that the space away would help me get enough distance from Elias to figure myself out. I thought I could figure out how to be around him now that he knows everything.

I still can't believe that he knows everything.

And that he doesn't hate me for it.

For taking away his chance to be a father.

For failing our son as a mother.

For being me.

I know that telling the truth is supposed to be better than living out a lie, but sometimes lying means keeping other people safe. Blissfully ignorant of how bad things really are.

Because Elias had this spark in him up until he knew, and now it's gone. And I get to spend everyday knowing that a part of him died because of me.

Indigo reaches across the car and places a comforting hand on my shoulder. She's not generally a touchy feely person so obviously I'm a mess if she's going as far as breaking the physical contact barrier.

"If you two were any other couple going through this situation, I'd probably be less inclined to believe in you the way that I do. But you and Elias are two of the strangest and most strangely resilient people I've ever met. And I've been around. I've seen a lot myself, but I've never met anyone like you guys. You have what it takes to survive this, it's just a matter of whether or not you choose to take hold of it right now. Or later."

I snort a horrifically disgusting wad of snot into my nose and look at Indigo through water-logged eyes.

"Take hold of what? I can't even make it through a conversation with Elias without the universe reminding me of what I did-"

The words lodge themselves somewhere in my throat and never make it past my lips.

"What you did, Alex, was something that you felt you had to do. And it wasn't anyone else's business but yours and Elias's, but thanks to the peons of the world, things have gotten out of control. And Elias is trying to work his way through that. You both are. That's how you know what you have is the real deal. As crazy as that spiritually conflicted boy is, he loves you, Alex. I've never seen anyone cry as much over a girl as he has over you. Proverbial Real talk."

Indigo mimics Elias's voice which makes me smile through my tears.

"Well, I think when it comes to crying about each other, Elias and I are tied for first place. To be totally honest, I'm surprised you're still willing to put up with us after everything we've dragged you into."

Indigo shrugs her shoulders like I haven't packed on eight billion pounds of my personal baggage onto them. Honest to goodness, I do not deserve her, yet here she is, silently continuing to be the best friend I've ever had without even trying to.

"We're more alike than you think, Alex. Cosmically bonded. The stars wouldn't have it any other way-and neither would I."

I place my hand on top of hers and squeeze it so she feels everything I'm too choked up to say. I've never had any of my friends back home stick around long enough to be as close to me as Indigo is. I take a mental picture of this moment and lock it away somewhere secret so I won't forget.

"What would I do without you, Indigo?"

She stares up at the skyline for a couple seconds before shifting her gaze back to the road.

"I don't know. Wither."

A laugh comes rumbling out of my lips for the first time in over a week.

"You're probably right. If it hadn't been for you, I wouldn't have left the dorm."

"And you wouldn't be on this grand adventure now."

I wipe most of my now runny make-up off onto my sleeve and stare outside to gain my bearings.

"Where are we, anyway?" I ask, but Indigo doesn't answer.

She eases her car off the freeway exit and cruises her way down the ramp right next to the coastline. The ocean stretches out in front of me until forever, kissing the sandy beaches with white-tipped waves over and over again.

It's unforgivingly beautiful. The way the sun skims off the water and highlights the multicolored houses lining the seaside.

I've been in and out of California for the last year and a half and I still don't feel like I've seen any of it. Instead, I've gotten to know the Golden State through a series of changing rooms. My dorm. Elias's. His family's houses. My cousin's. All of those places defined so much of what California is to me now, but being here is different.

A place where the light doesn't begin, or end, it just stays.

Trapped on the horizon, keeping away the rain.

***

Fifteen minutes later, Indigo's car stalls out in the parking lot of the Ventura County fairgrounds. If I were her, I'd probably be freaking out right now or speed-dialing AAA to come and rescue me.

But unlike me, Indigo possesses a level of chill I will never achieve and is too busy staring out at the hundreds of artisan booths in front of us to care about the fact that we're stranded.

Okay, maybe stranded is an extreme term and there are worse things than being stuck at what looks like California's annual Bohemian Convention, but still. Whatever mysterious destination we were supposed to be going to is totally out of the question now.

"We're here. Smile first-timer," She says.

Indigo pulls me into a Polaroid selfie which will most likely turn out horrible given the general confusion scrawled across my face.

"We're where?"

Indigo takes the Polaroid out of her camera and starts shaking it around just like the OutKast song says to.

"Freedom Fest-"

Freedom what?

"-only the best artisan festival this side of SoCal. Souvenir?"

She hands me the photo. Yep. I look as dazed and confused as I thought I did. Great. I tuck it into my purse and say a silent prayer that it makes it back to the dorm without being maimed, bent, or spilled on.

"O-kay. Okay! Cool! This is super cool! And unexpectedly adventurous. I love festivals! Is there funnel cake? I could totally stress eat funnel cake and drown all of my sorrows in whipped cream! How'd you know this is was exactly what I needed?!"

Indigo eyes me in that special way she does when I know she doesn't want to say that I'm crazy but secretly thinks I am.

"Just a feeling. Welcome to paradise, sister. This is the gateway to the greatest place in the universe!"

She extends a hand in my direction and I take it without question.

"Lead the way to the funnel cake!"

"It's-not that kind of festival," she says.

"So, no funnel cake?"

"Sorry, chica. That's a no go on the funnel cake show."

My heart sinks a little but the rush from Indigo breaking into her version of a sprint towards the festival lights lifts it right back up again. We dart through rows of beat up and broken down hippie cars not too different from Indigo's with the ocean breeze at our backs.

I've missed this. Being able to just exist in the excitement of a moment without any ugly reminders to steal away the spark.

The world here isn't surrounded by familiar smells, sounds, or sadness. Everything's new. Different. From the dreadlock rocking girls wearing patch-work skirts, midriff shirts, and spiral bone earrings. To the bohemian boys walking around shirtless, tattooed, and suntanned.

This place-without asking or trying to be-is the home away from home I've been looking for.

A nowhere that's become somewhere for a Nobody like me.

Indigo bypasses the massive mob of people crowding around the general entrance and heads over to a small "Artisans Only" kiosk manned by a brown-eyed, olive-skinned, guy with Jack Sparrow braids in his hair. He waves at Indigo with an ever so slightly stoned smile as she makes her way over to his booth.

"What's up, Wild Child? It's been a minute! Good to see you back this year!"

He sweeps Indigo up in a hug that she actually returns which slightly floors me given how rarely she gives them.

"Thanks, Danger. It wouldn't be Freedom Fest without the Wild clan. Speaking of which, where's-"

"Papa J's set up in Row C, as always. His stuff looks sick this year. If I wasn't broke-"

"You'd buy one. I know, Dange. Maybe next year?" Indigo asks.

Danger or Dodger or whatever shrugs like a ten-year old and flashes Indigo another lazy smile.

"Maybe next year-"

And then directs it right towards me.

"-anyway, before I wrist band you guys up, wanna introduce me to your cute friend?" He asks.

All of the color drains out of my face. I try to form my mouth into a smile to take the awkwardness out of the moment, but it doesn't work.

Once upon a time getting hit on might have made me blush, but the only thing it does now is remind me of how physically distant Elias is from me-and how uncomfortable I am with the feeling.

Indigo takes one look my way and waves Danger off like a pro.

"She's taken. Sorry, D. Wristbands, please?"

Danger's cheeks flush but in less than seconds he's back to booth business like he never said anything at all. Once our passes are wrapped around our wrists, Indigo starts swaying to the sound of the live music seeping out of a pair of speakers from the main stage in the distance and motions for me to follow her.

"Where are we going?" I ask.

Indigo wags a disapproving finger in my direction and keeps dancing down the lines of artsy booths like she's barely touching the ground.

"Somewhere necessary. No more questions, just follow the leader and let yourself go."

So I do.

I take a deep breath, forget myself for a little while, and dance my way into the adventure ahead.

***

One silver toe ring, and two henna tattoos later, Indigo and I find ourselves standing outside a booth filled with beautifully carved handmade guitars on display. Indigo jumps over the first row of what looks like extremely expensive six strings and into the selling area of a sun-kissed, pepper-haired, grizzly-bearded musician who's too busy tuning to notice her at first. But the second her feet hit the ground next to him, he shifts his gaze away from his guitar, stands up, and lifts Indigo off the ground.

He spins her around and kisses her cheek while she laughs like a ten-year old girl. This Indigo, I've never seen before. One who's lighter than air and bursting with the kind of innocent love that turns her into a kid again.

She looks down at the man holding her high above the whole world and smiles the kind of smile that must only belong to him. He shoots it right back and in those few beautiful seconds everything clicks.

"You're getting old, Pop. You didn't even hear me coming this time," Indigo says.

Her dad gently sets her down and then ruffles her hair.

"Not old. Just deaf. That's the price I pay for rocking out all these years. How's my wild girl?"

Indigo brightens up like a lightbulb.

"Good. But busy. I'm showing my soul sister around, but we've got a show to catch in a couple minutes."

Her dad's eyes sparkle at the mention of a show. He has the kind of face that tells a million stories. Ones from the road, the stage, or maybe somewhere else wild and wonderful. He looks like an artist tailor-made for music and adventure. The same way Indigo is. There's a vagabond in her soul and his. And in more ways than one they look like mirrors of each other.

His style screams laid back Indie musician with the memory of LA flare. The way he wears a dark Henley shirt, leather vest, torn up jeans, and leather braided bracelets immediately hint at where Indigo got her fearless fashion sense from.

If I could have a second family, I'd jump into this one in a heartbeat. Fact.

"And who's your fellow concert goer?" He asks as he extends a kind and calloused hand in my direction. I take it and take in his endearingly easygoing smile.

"I'm Alex. Nice to meet you-"

"John Axel. But everyone calls me Jax. I've heard some great stories about you. She's lucky to have you, Alex."

I blush.

"Thanks, but I think it's the other way around. Indigo's an amazing person and-"

Indigo claps her hands and steals both of our attention.

"Sorry to interrupt, but the shows are starting on the main stage and I don't want Alex to miss the best part of the day."

Her dad slips into a lighthearted laugh and nods us both in the direction where the festival stage is set up.

"Go on, you two. I don't want you to miss this set. Especially since one of my guitars might make a special appearance. I sold one to a kid earlier and I think he'll do it justice. Film part of the set for me if you can, Indi. I wanna see my Razorback model in action."

"Will do, Pop. We'll catch up with you after the show," Indigo says and then pulls me off towards the stage area before I can say goodbye.

We fly past rows of booths selling tie-dyed clothes, hemp bags, and artifacts from countries around the world. My mind makes it's way back to Elias and suddenly I'm picturing the both of us wandering through Freedom fest, trying on crazy Bohemian clothes, eating weird vegan creations together, and losing ourselves in the crowd.

I try imagining another version of us, the Elias and Alex who never lost touch, never lost each other, and never lost a son. Maybe if our history hadn't played out the way it has, we'd be like the other couples Indigo and I are passing by. Openly together. Easily in love. Existing without the kind of sadness Elias and I live with everyday.

But at least today's been a break in the storm. A few amazing hours where I've gotten to step out of myself for a little while and pretend that enjoying life is as simple as a beach side festival. In a place where Nobody knows me. I needed this. More than I knew. And I owe Indigo everything for giving me a chance to escape.

"You don't mind crowds do you?" Indigo asks as we start edging our way through a sizable amount of people huddled around the main stage.

"Not really."

"Good, 'cause the next act is probably going to draw a big one. It's gonna be a battle to get up front, but it'll be worth the bloodshed," she says.

"Wait-do we seriously have to fight people because I'm kind of claustrophobic and mosh pits are my nightmare," I say.

My face pales a little but Indigo waves off my shock with a smile.

"It's not that kind of show. But you might have to shoulder your way through some concert goers if you wanna good spot. Watch and learn."

For a girl who isn't much taller than me, Indigo's surprisingly ballsy when she wants to be. And this is coming from someone who used to clock therapists in her free time. She tightens her grip around my hand and weaves her way through the crowd like the Bohemian boss lady that she is.

Eventually, people start stepping aside for her before she even reaches them like she's the grand chieftain of the Indie concert scene. We get right to the front where a tattooed security guard throws Indigo a high five and congratulates her for making it on time.

I almost ask her why this show of all shows seems to be some sort of special occasion, until the tall, tawny musician steps on stage and answers all of my questions.

He throws a charming wave to the crowd when he sits down which causes most of the girls to go crazy, while Indigo just shakes her head like she's seen this a million times. He rests his guitar on his thigh, runs his fingers through his messy dark hair, and smiles a megawatt smile into the microphone.

"Well, that was one heck of a welcome," he says, and the audience goes crazy all over again. He kindly gestures at the mob to settle down and then starts tuning his guitar a string at a time.

"It's good to be back Ventura. For those of you who are old friends, family, or near and dear to my heart-"

He finds Indigo in the crowd and winks at her, and she blushes like a girly-girl. Total Polaroid moment.

"-thanks for coming out to see me again. And for those of you who I haven't met yet, thanks for giving me a chance to show you a good time. I'm Ryker Lowe and this first song is a new one. I co-wrote it with a friend of mine and I'd like to start tonight off by asking him to come on stage so we can play it for you. You guys alright with that?"

Everyone and their grandmother starts cheering-myself included, just waiting on the edge of our excitement for the show to start. Meanwhile, Indigo's staring up at the stage with stars in her eyes just watching Ryker shine.

I don't know what it is about the two of them that feels like magic, but their connection is truly something else. Something beautiful.

Then something beautiful comes playing through the speakers bringing the crowd to a low hush.

A melody on guitar starts to play.

It's simple and flows, repeating this calming and mesmerizing pattern.

It isn't Ryker because he hasn't even started playing yet. So the crowd starts to look around like I do. Everyone's buzzing with a little confusion and anticipation at this new song as it cycles through the main melody a few times. Everyone wondering where it's coming from. Who's playing it.

It's one of those songs that catches you off guard in the opening intro where you know you'll listen through the whole thing and not check out or change the station.

And, that's when the sight of it hits me.

It's not so much that this song seems so fitting to what I need to hear right now.

It's more who comes out playing it. He's a little timid when he first steps out. I can tell because he looks to Ryker a few times for reassurance, but he's lost enough in the melody to keep going.

I catch Indigo looking at me and she seems to know exactly what I'm asking as I stare back at her without having to say a word.

"I know what you're thinking. And, the answer is, it's not so much that we are meddling with the cosmos. It's more so the universe converging and using mere mortal instruments like Ryker and I to further its goal towards peace, harmony, and the eventual overall good it intends."

I don't even get a chance to answer or make sense of what Indigo just said because Ryker's voice cuts through the crowd with an introduction to the mysterious guitar player who is no mystery to me.

"Alright, guys and gals, please join me in giving a warm welcome to a good friend of mine, the immensely talented, songwriter, guitarist, and poet extraordinaire, Elias King."

***

(Thank you guys so much for reading and listening! Today was filled with more technical difficulties than we could handle but the chapter is finally here! kaelking12 did an especially awesome job co-writing this one AND writing and recording the audiobook + an original song she wrote for the story! We literally sat down for five hours to get this sucker done on time so we hope you enjoy the listen!

NEXT UPDATE: SUNDAY, OCTOBER 21ST

See you then!)

#REALTALK QUESTIONS OF THE WEEK:

1. On a scale from 1 to 10 how excited are you for Elias and Alex's unexpected beachside festival reunion!?!?!?

2. Alex waxed nostalgic this chapter--What is your favorite Alex and Elias memory in either CFTM, LHLH, or FHKH?

3. Who else loves funnel cake?! #ThingsIMissAboutAmerica