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Elias

"Jersey, breathe."

She doesn't. She hasn't for the past twenty seconds, and if she doesn't open her mouth soon I'm gonna make her.

"Look, I just need a favor to please my dad, okay? Don't freak out."

"I'm not freaking out--"

Too late. She starts squeaking and stuttering and making all kinds of noises before the idea even has a chance to settle in.

"--I'm--I'm just trying to process everything."

"Nah, you're freaking out."

"Well, wouldn't you be?! You're asking me, the girl who harassed your dad over the phone, to take her parent-pissing-off skills a step further and lie to him about being your girlfriend!"

"Sounds about right."

"How is this a good idea, Elias? What if he tells your mom or Tanner about this?"

"He won't. Him and my mom don't talk, and fuck what Tanner thinks."

Jersey folds her arms across her chest and hugs her sides.

"It's just...I don't want to give anyone else anymore reasons to be upset at you, Elias, especially if those reasons aren't true. Technically, we're not even a 'we' right now, we're--"

"In progress," I say.

She lets out a couple frustrated grunts, but hey, at least she's not shooting down the idea of a relationship. Yet.

"We're not 'in' anything. We're just friends."

"Not really, but you can say that if it makes you feel better."

Her face turns so red her skin looks like a stovetop.

Yeah.

She still likes me.

"Woah, woah, woah. We made a deal, remember? No feelings, no flirting--"

"No fun. I know, I get it, but the thing is, I'm all about having fun, Jersey. And making you sweat--"

I lean towards her.

"--right through your clothes--"

She curls her bottom lip between her teeth. Good thing she did or else I would've been tempted to bite it. Real talk.

"--is one of my favorite games."

She inches away from me and backs into the car door.

"Well, I don't like your games--"

Her body sure does.

"--especially when you act like you're genuinely serious about the whole-more-than-friends thing."

"I am serious. You're clearly not over me, and I'm obviously still into you, so why can't we skip the whole plantonic situation, and just--"

I let my hands do the talking and brush the tips of my fingers up the length of her thigh. Her skin's burning under my fingers, so I slow down just to watch her reaction. She parts her lips and sucks in a sharp breath the second I reach the edge of her shorts. 

I probably shouldn't be touching her, but I don't know how to stop--,and she's not stopping me. I freeze up and wait for her to say something, but she doesn't. She's staring at me as intensely as I'm staring at her. I wanna keep going. I want to forget about my dad and last night and just drown in her.

But I stop myself short.

I slow down, pull back from an old addiction, and try to get back in control.

She's still not sure of anything. She's still not sure of me. And, as much as I want her, she's gotta want us, and right now she's sending nothing but mixed signals.

I sit back in my seat and shut my eyes to block out the redness in her cheeks, her sunkissed skin, and those nervous lips.

Breathe, Elias. Breathe.

"Jersey, I'm sorry. I--"

"It's okay. You were just--we were um--I'm sorry too. Let's just f-forget that happened, okay?" She says, her words flying off her tongue a mile a minute.

I ignore the pounding in my chest and force myself to look at her.

"You felt that, right?"

"Felt what?" She asks, but the live wire buzz behind her eyes give her unspoken secrets away.

"That thing that happens anytime we get close to each other."

"It's called hormones, and I'm pretty sure it's one sided."

Ha.

"I'm pretty sure it's not. Look, why don't we just start over? Why can't we can pick up the pieces, stop bullshitting ourselves, and try to fix things?"

"Because some things can't be fixed, Elias."

"And you and me aren't one of them."

Jersey looks at me for the first time since we started this conversation, but I can't read her. I don't know if some part of her still wants to believe that we can survive ourselves, or if she's lost her faith in the future. But I open my mouth and start talking before she forces me to figure her out.

"Let me be 100% honest with you, so you don't get pissed at me later. I don't wanna be your friend, Jersey. I'm not gonna braid your hair. We're not gonna watch chick flicks together. And, I'm not gonna pretend I don't want you because, fuck, I do, and I can't change that anymore than you can change how you feel about me."

"You don't know how I feel about you, Elias."

"Yeah, I do--"

I step to her and take her by the shoulders before she caves in on herself.

"I've known since last summer. I still want you back, J, and I'm gonna bust my balls to get you back. But if you want me if you want me to stop trying, you better speak now or forever hold your pizza. Last chance."

I stare at this girl a lot. Like, a lot a lot. But I've never seen her eyes come as close to popping out of her head as they did right then. I mean, maybe I should've kept my mouth shut and kept playing along with her kumbaya friendship circle, but honestly, I'm not that guy. I'm the guy with the big mouth, who'd rather have it stuck to hers, than have to stand here an explain the way I feel.

I wish she'd just let me make out with her. Making out makes everything better. Quote me.

"You know it's...forever hold your peace, right?" She says, after a long silence.

"You know what I meant, Jersey."

She leans her head back against the seat and stares up straight through the sunroof.

"Would I be a total jerk if I asked for a rain check on this conversation? I need time, Elias. I just need you to--"

"I know. I'll wait--"

Even though it's killing me.

"--but can you at least give me an esteban on how long it's gonna take exactly?" I ask.

She shoots me a concerned smile which makes no sense because I'm pretty sure my sarca-sar--scar--sarcasm was supposed to make her laugh.

"It's 'estimate', and no. But what I can do is pretend we're dating in front of your dad. If it'll help make things less stressful between you two, I'll do it."

A cooler guy would've brushed off her comment like it was nothing. But this girl makes me lose my mind, so I lean across the car and try to pull her into an awkward seat belt hug. My strap tightens, slaps back against my neck, and I make some kinda loud quacking/choking noise mid-motion. Jersey's face goes white, and she pushes me off of her before I strangle myself.

"Sit back and chill before you choke and die!"

I do exactly as she says because she could talk me into anything with that accent, and wait till my lungs relax before I speak. Man, I probably should've laid off the weed in high school.

"God, I love it when you tell me what to do. I'm so turned on right now I don't even care that I just choked."

She turns as far away from me as possible and points out at the road.

"The only thing that should be turned on right now is the car, Elias. I thought you said we needed to leave. It's already past ten, and we haven't even eaten yet."

I check the clock only to realize that we've got less than two hours before my dad expects us to show up. Great.

"Actually, is it cool if we skip breakfast? I gotta a few things to do before we head to my dad's."

"What do you have planned? I thought the point of this trip was to not have plans."

Still so spontaneous. Noted.

"It is, but my dad's anal about me showing up to his work related events, so I need to pick up a couple things to keep him happy. I look like shit, and I smell like Indigo's car."

Jersey glances down at herself before trying to low key sniff herself without me noticing. I totally do.

"Me too! Is there something special we need to wear?"

About that....

"I got us covered. We just have to go on a little adventure is all. You down? We can figure out food later."

I glance over only to find Jersey bent over the backseat tearing through Indigo's backseat. A couple minutes an handful of smacking noises later she turns around with a ring of chocolate around her mouth and a half-eaten brownie in her hand. Maybe she really was a gremlin in her past life.

"Want some? Indigo has a whole box of cookies, and gummi bears and snacks back here."

I try not to laugh at the fact that she looks like she fell face first into a cow pie and turn down her offer.

"Nah, I'm good. You ready to roll?" I ask.

She clicks on her seatbelt and shoots me a sideways stare.

"I'm fine. The question is are you ready? I can drive if you want."

She has a point, but I wanna try driving without freaking out for once. I want to show her that I can.

"Thanks, but I can handle this, I got you as my co-pilot, remember? As long as you're here, I'm good to go."

In more ways than one.

"Great! Stick that key in the ignition so we can hit it!"

And...I'm hard, and its great 'cause it doesn't hurt as bad as it did before, but it looks like I stuffed the Eiffel Tower down my pants. Real talk. I turn the car on and back out of the parking lot to try to get my body to focus on something other than her.

"What did you say we were gonna hit, Jersey?"

I smile through the pain,and she rolls her eyes and glares at me like my teachers used to when I'd shout out stupid shit in class. Man, I'd pay money to let Jersey play teacher. She'd be so hot in one of those tight white shirts, and those little black skirts that show off her legs. My eyes drift down towards her thighs, but she snaps in front of my face before I get creepy about it. Again.

"The road, moron! What did you think I was talking about?"

Dirty, hot, sweaty, se--

"Nothing, J. Nothing."

***

(Thank you so much for reading guys! Sorry this one is so short but I'm leaving for vacation so it's going to be a few weeks before I'm able to update unless me and @kaelking12 are able to work out recording sessions. I hope you guys have an incredible summer! Anyone listen to the audiobook! We had a hilarious time recording it so we hope you guys enjoyed it! 

PS: I've gotten officially added into the Goodreads Author Program! So if you liked CFTM (either the Wattpad version of the book or the new audiobook) and want to give it an honest rating feel free to rate it on Goodreads!)