wherever we
are going, it's
definitely not
the mall.

it is somewhere
far away, and it
must burn a lot
of gas.

every time I
peep up and try
to ask, I'm shot
down immediately
by my two
strange
annoying
selfish
sisters.

wherever it is
must be
somewhere that
they don't want
to go to, and
their only joy
in it is singing
the lyrics to
p!nk and selena
gomez and
bruno mars.

I wonder if this
far away place is
somewhere I will
like, or if it's
somewhere that
just reminds me
of what I had,
that I lost, and
pains my heart
enough to kill
my solar-energy.
man, I miss him.

we park and I
reach up to grab
the cloth over my sight,
but I'm smacked in the head.

"no"
"don't you dare"
"we ain't there yet"

I wonder
I wonder
I wonder.

is this place
like our
vacation,
is it beautiful
but not that
beautiful, not
his beautiful.
would it be
somewhere I
would protect
him from?
or somewhere I
dreamt of
before I even knew
what love was?
or somewhere
I never even
knew about?

or is it somewhere
plain,
that I shouldn't even
be thinking of.
like a community garden.
or the movie theaters.
or a musty motel,
so that we could
see a different
part of our home.

is it even a place,
I'm going towards?

no
stop
it only hurts
pretend he's gone
pretend he's
better off,
pretend and lies
will become the truth
don't think of him
and he won't think of you.

so I stopped wondering
and just
listened to the awful singing
of people who don't love me.