❛ Since you went away, the days grow long and soon I'll hear old winter's song but I miss you most of all when autumn leaves start to fall. ❜

DEAD POETS SOCIETY
chapter twenty-three

ELIZA HAD TAKEN her Uncle's keys from his room once she knew he was in a deep sleep. John had gotten so anxious over Neil and what drastic measures his father would use to keep him out of acting that he had purchased himself a bottle of white wine to help ease his mind for the night. Also known as the sure-fire way of getting John Keating into a deep, unbreakable sleep.

⠀⠀⠀Although, for Eliza, her anxieties were far darker than her Uncle's. She didn't just think of Mr. Perry and what he would do. Taking Neil out of Welton, shipping him off to a military school, etc. But what Neil would do in retaliation.

⠀⠀⠀So, she made her way quietly to the boy's dormitory, hoping to all hell that she wouldn't wake Hager in his room. She made her way all the way to the end before cracking the door to Charlie and Cameron's room ever so slightly, just so that she could slip in.

⠀⠀⠀Eliza hadn't thought this far, though. She knew Cameron would be asleep in the room, but how would she keep them both quiet if they woke up to find a stranger in their room. She could only hope Cameron was a deep sleeper.

⠀⠀⠀"Charlie," she whispered quietly, pushing his shoulder gently. "Come on, Charlie."

⠀⠀⠀"Eliza?" Charlie muttered, opening his eyes just barely. "What are you doing here?" he asked.

⠀⠀⠀"Charlie, come on, get your shoes," Eliza insisted, taking his arm and pulling him out of his bed. She moved across the room to where his shoes were and forced them into his hands.

⠀⠀⠀"What are you talking about?"

⠀⠀⠀"I'll explain on the way," Eliza assured him, clinging to his free hand. "But right now, we're leaving."

⠀⠀⠀"Alright, alright," Charlie continued. He held his shoes close to his chest as they peeled out of Welton and into the parking lot.

⠀⠀⠀The two made it to Keating's car, Eliza quickly getting in while Charlie stood awkwardly at the door, unsure of what to do now that he was semi-conscious and worried about his girlfriend.

⠀⠀⠀"Birdie," he sighed, opening the door and leaning down to look at her pretty face. "What are we doing?"

⠀⠀⠀"I'm worried about Neil," she confessed, soft prickles of tears coming to her eyes. "I feel like he might do something bad and if I go to sleep tonight telling myself: 'No he's fine, he's Neil', and something does happen! I'm going to hate myself for the rest of my life," she explained quickly, her knuckles turning white on the steering wheel and the sob getting caught in the back of her throat.

⠀⠀⠀"Hey," he breathed, climbing into the car and shutting his door. "Okay, let's go. Let's go check on Neil."

⠀⠀⠀Eliza nodded, putting the car into gear and pulling out of Welton with Charlie as her guide.

⠀⠀⠀"Maybe we can sneak him out of the house so that we can get his mind off of everything," Eliza was telling Charlie as she turned a corner. Charlie held tightly to the skin of the car as she sped to Neil's house. "I don't know! I just need to know that he's okay."

⠀⠀⠀Eliza screeched down the road to Neil's house, the snow making her tires slick, and as she tried to break as Charlie screamed at her to do, she slid a few houses down the road. However, it didn't matter as she wrenched her car door open and bolted her way to Neil's house. Her mind kept turning, fretting the worst, until it came true.

⠀⠀⠀A single shot blasted through the quiet neighborhood, driving Eliza to her knees.

⠀⠀⠀"Oh, my God," she sobbed, all of her limbs feeling like they were melting away until she would melt into the snow and become a part of it. "Neil!" she screamed, trying to bring herself back to her feet.

⠀⠀⠀Charlie helped Eliza up as he sobbed, just as she, trying to reassure her, but none the less the two stumbled their way towards the Perry residence. "Eliza, Eliza, Eliza," Charlie kept saying as they stood at the door ringing every bell and knocking as loud as they could on the door. By now, his parents should have found him. "D-D-Do you have a bobby pin or a uh, uh, something to pick this door with?" Charlie asked, bending down to his knees.

⠀⠀⠀Eliza patted her hair and then her pockets.

⠀⠀⠀"No, I don't... I don't have anything," she said between her sobs, holding her fist to her mouth, unsure of what to do. She shoved her hands into her pockets and slowly dragged a paper clip out from the papers she had been grading earlier that day. "Wait, I have this."

⠀⠀⠀Charlie nodded, taking the clip from her shaky hands into his own as he uncurled the metal and moved to open the door. Soon after, they were stumbling inside.

⠀⠀⠀"We need to call the police or someone!" Eliza exclaimed. "Where's their phone?" she asked, her eyes everywhere but at him.

⠀⠀⠀"The kitchen!" Charlie exclaimed, running to the kitchen and finding the phone. Nervously, he picked up the handheld phone and dialed the number, with Eliza standing behind him. "I can't do it!" Charlie practically screamed, shoving the phone into Eliza's hand just as the operator answered.

⠀⠀⠀"Hello, what's your emergency?" the woman asked calmly.

⠀⠀⠀"Hi, uh, my friend... our friend had a play and uh... shot himself. Please," she sobbed into the receiver as she listened to Neil's mother screamed in the basement. "Come quickly."

⠀⠀⠀"Of course, ma'am," the woman said kindly. "What is your address?"

⠀⠀⠀"I, uh, hold on," she said, looking to Charlie. "The address!"

⠀⠀⠀Charlie took the phone, stating the address for the woman before shoving the phone right back to Eliza.

⠀⠀⠀"We'll be there shortly. Would you like me to stay on the line until they get there?' the operator asked, her soothing voice reassuring the two.

⠀⠀⠀"Yes, please," Eliza whispered.

⠀⠀⠀The woman spoke kindly to the two teenagers huddled in an unfamiliar kitchen while they held the bright yellow phone like a lifeline. She reassured them that authorities were coming and just to stay with her and breathe. She asked them simple questions like where they were from, if they had seen any movies recently, and so on to keep the phone call filled with chatter to ease them. Soon, the familiar sound of sirens filled the air, and the dread that had left them filled them right back up again.

⠀⠀⠀"They're here," Eliza said to the operator.

⠀⠀⠀"Alright," she said. "Stay where you are, and some of my men will come in and help you outside."

⠀⠀⠀"Thank you," Charlie breathed into the phone.

⠀⠀⠀"Of course, and please be careful."

⠀⠀⠀Charlie was the one to hang up the phone as the authorities entered the house. The men first came to them as they were the only sign of life in the house, but as soon as they stuttered out an explanation, they moved deeper into the house.

⠀⠀⠀The medics moved Charlie and Eliza outside with emergency blankets wrapped around them. They checked the couple's vitals, claiming that they were in shock.

⠀⠀⠀"I'm Sergeant Daniels," the police officer greeted as he walked up to the two cold teenagers sitting close to one another. "I'll be taking you two back to Welton."

⠀⠀⠀"Is he okay?" Eliza asked quietly, tears stained down her cheeks and falling once again, knowing the answer.

⠀⠀⠀"Come now," Sergeant Daniels stated. "My partner, Myers, will escort us in your vehicle. Do you mind if we take the keys from you?" he asked, looking at Charlie.

⠀⠀⠀"Actually, I left them in the car," Eliza stated, pointing down to the car where the lights were still on and streamed a spotlight on them.

⠀⠀⠀Myers nodded and jogged towards the car while Sergeant Daniels took the kids back to Welton.

CHARLIE AND ELIZA had taken it upon themselves to tell the boys. Mr. Nolan agreed that such devastating news would best come from those who knew him best and not from their teachers. It would only bring them more pain for the long road ahead anyways.

⠀⠀⠀Eliza had taken Meeks and Pitts since they shared a room and then Knox since they had grown close over the past few months. Charlie took Cameron since he was his roommate, and Todd knowing he'd be the hardest to break the news to.

⠀⠀⠀Neil and Todd had grown close. Closer than any of them, it had seemed. More than Eliza and Knox as friends, Eliza wondered if even closer than she and Charlie.

⠀⠀⠀Neil had accepted Todd for all his flaws and grew to accept them as Todd is and forever would be. The awkward, quiet, shy kid that sat at the back of the class and didn't want to recite his own poetry to the class. However, just by being around Neil, Todd was more open and talkative to all of them since they'd first met in September.

⠀⠀⠀Now, that felt like ages ago.

⠀⠀⠀Charlie kneeled beside Todd's bed, tears streaming down his cheeks. Eliza had already gone to Pitts, Meeks, and Knox, explaining what had happened. None of them seemed to grasp the situation just yet. There were no tears in their eyes yet, no clenching in their hearts. It was only bubbling in their chests. Soon, they'd erupt into what Eliza and Charlie had become.

⠀⠀⠀Although, they all knew this would be the most devastating for Todd than for any of them. They loved Neil; he was one of their best friends and had known him for years, but for Todd... Neil had become someone who changed the very fabric of his being. He understood Todd's faults and actions and didn't hold him up to the same standards as his brother because they were different people. Neil was a lifeline that had snapped right in the very middle. All Todd could become now was broken.

⠀⠀⠀"Todd," Charlie called quietly, unable to bring himself to be any louder than he was. So instead, he moved his hand over to his shoulder and gently shook him. "Todd."

⠀⠀⠀Todd rolled over, seeing Charlie beside him but not fully taking him in as he shrugged him off and turned to his other side to go back to sleep. Charlie shook him again, despite Todd's wishes. He turned, annoyed, but found the tears falling down Charlie's cheeks. Todd looked to the door where the four stood watching him. Their somber looks woke him up fully as he sat up in his bed.

⠀⠀⠀Cameron was the only one missing, locking himself in his room after hearing the news.

⠀⠀⠀"Neil's dead," Charlie croaked.

⠀⠀⠀Todd eventually got out of his bed, numb, and pulled on his thick Welton coat. The other boys rushed to their rooms to do the same, Charlie giving Eliza one of his old ones to avoid wasting any time trying to get from her room back outside where the others were headed.

⠀⠀⠀They made their way outside into the snow and followed close behind Todd as he walked further and further into the cold. He was too calm for the boys as he stopped in the middle of the lawn. He stared at the snowflakes falling all around them. Then, he turned to the boys and Eliza, smiling timidly, "It's so beautiful," he finally said.

⠀⠀⠀The bots tried to smile with him, but they couldn't find it within themselves to make it real. Especially when Todd turned away from them and began dry heaving before he fell into the snow and threw up the empty contents of his stomach.

⠀⠀⠀Immediately, the boys rushed over to him, holding him close and assuring him everything was okay. Eliza stood back, knowing that she didn't need to be right beside him. Both for his and her own sake. She felt it could only make things worse.

⠀⠀⠀"Todd. It's okay, Todd."

⠀⠀⠀"Calm down."

⠀⠀⠀"It's alright, Todd."

⠀⠀⠀"Todd, it's okay. It's okay, Todd."

⠀⠀⠀"It's alright. It's alright."

⠀⠀⠀The boys tried to calm him, holding him tightly to their chests as he squirmed in their arms as he sobbed. Charlie took a fistful of snow and wiped Todd's mouth with it to remove the excess bile residing on his lips.

⠀⠀⠀"He wouldn't, he wouldn't have done it," Todd told them in between his sobs.

⠀⠀⠀"You can't explain it, Todd," Meeks said calmly, crying as well.

⠀⠀⠀"It was his father!" Todd claimed, turning to the boys to see if they believed him.

⠀⠀⠀"No!" Pitts said immediately, getting the thought out of Todd's head before he made a mess of things for them and Neil's family.

⠀⠀⠀"He wouldn't have left us. It's because he... He wouldn't have! His dad was, his, his father did it!" Todd exclaimed.

⠀⠀⠀"Todd," Charlie scolded him further.

⠀⠀⠀"His father killed him! He made him do it!" Todd stated.

⠀⠀⠀Even though it might be true that Mr. Perry's cold strive to give his son the life he never had by pushing Neil into a place where he didn't want to go, it was Neil who pulled the trigger.

⠀⠀⠀"You can't explain it, Todd," Meeks told him again.

⠀⠀⠀Todd wasn't listening as he pushed himself away from them. He forced his way down the hill and away from everything that reminded him of Neil.

⠀⠀⠀The boys tried to follow him, but Eliza called them back, saying, "Leave him. He needs this."

⠀⠀⠀They stopped in their tracks at her words, watching as Todd finally stopped at the dock by the river, yelling and crying before he stopped and just stared silently out at the frozen lake.

AUTHOR'S NOTE —

All I have to say is:

SONG: Autumn Leaves by Frank Sinatra

Thank you for reading! Leave comments telling me your thoughts on this chapter, but however you interact, know that I really appreciate you reading. I hope you enjoy, and until the next one.