And here's some more angst XD

__Captain Thaladir's Point of View__

I stepped out of the royal living quarters in a daze. He blamed me for his disappearance. He blamed me. My head pounded. He was right to do so. If I hadn't steered the prince away from his better judgment, we should have slept by the road and he would be here now or in Imladris. The world swayed and I leaned against the wall as my legs trembled.

I forced my legs to work under me as I moved forward. I couldn't remember when I had last slept. Dolenel had suffered a minor injury when a small clan of spiders attacked and I had no choice but to stay up with the night watch as he recovered. I had to make it home. I hadn't seen my family in two years. I sent back a few letters, but they were never able to send responses as they never knew where I was.

I made it to the end of the hall before my stomach flipped. I stumbled to my knees, trying to keep from throwing up what little food was left in my stomach. I squeezed my eyes shut as my vision and hearing tunneled.

"Sir?" someone asked, male from what little I could tell. He sounded as if he covered his mouth when he spoke. "Sir, are you alright?" I shook my head then felt myself pitching forward. I assume he caught me as my face never hit the floor.

"Thaladir!" he exclaimed. "Dear, Valar what happened to you?"

I slowly forced my eyes open, catching a glimpse of an ellon's face. He was a guard and use to trail Legolas when he was younger. "Himon," I whispered, a slight smile pulling at my mouth. It had been years since I had seen him.

He nodded. "Aye, it is I. What happened? Are you hurt?"

I shook my head. "Tired..." I furrowed my brow, wondering when I had become so exhausted I could no longer hold myself up. He looked at me and frowned.

"Let's get you home, captain. You can rest then." I nodded and he helped me to my feet and taking most of my weight, he lead me away from the royal halls and out of the palace gate. The night blurred past as I focused solely on placing one foot in front of the other. Valar, how many times have I had to do this?

My eyes felt heavy and I began to stumble more and more until the little cabin finally came into view. Tears pricked the corners of my eyes at the sight. It had been so long and I suddenly relized how much I missed this place.

"Come on," Himon said, dragging me forward. "Let's get you to your family."

I let out a laugh, a bit of energy trying to spark in my veins, though Himron still held me upright. He didn't bother knocking and opened the door, leading me inside. He helped me over to the couch and I sunk down into it gratefully, eyes sliding shut before my head even touched the fabric.

"Thaladir?" the voice immediately woke me. Faervel knelt before me. I smiled and she pushed my hair back from my face. "Are you hurt?" I shook my head, but she still looked to Himron. He shook his head from where he sat, stirring up the fire.

"I don't believe so," he said. "But he's exhausted and likely hungry." My sister nodded and turned back to me.

"You've worked yourself into the ground too far this time, brother." Her expression dropped. "Did you find any sign of the prince?"

I shook my head, closing my eyes. Their figures were beginning to blur and their euphonious voices, distant. She placed a kiss on my forehead. "You'll find him. I know you will. But for now, rest. You won't be going anywhere for awhile on my watch."

"Can't..." I said. Oblivion pulled at my conscience. "King said I had to head out again in the morning..." My words trailed off and I felt her hand still on my arm. She began to mumble something, but I was too far gone to heed her protests.

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Something crashed and I sat up, reaching for my knife only to find it missing from my hip. My heart pounded in my chest, breaths coming in gasps.

"I'm so sorry!" Inwen exclaimed, running in form the kitchen. "I didn't mean to wake you!"

I shook my head, lowering it into the palm of my hand. "It's alright, I needed to wake up anyway. I have to head out soon." The king's words the night before playing in my mind as I held myself up using the back of the couch. Nausea plagued me immediately from enervation but I swallowed it down. He was right. I had to find him.

Something sizzling came from the kitchen and I gestured to the stove. Inwen hesitated a moment until something popped and she hurried back, standing before the stove, steam rising from the pan and into her face as she stirred the pot's contents.

I looked away, staring at the ground as I tried to pull myself together. I had never felt so physically drain without having sustained an injury. I squeezed my eyes shut. I may as well stay long enough to eat.

The sun shone on my face and I forced my scratchy, dry eyes open again as a presence sat down beside me. Faervel wrapped an arm around my shoulders. "Please, don't go yet," she whispered. "You'll get yourself killed out there like this."

I let out a breath, turning to look into her reddened eyes. "I have to, Faervel. King's orders. Legolas is out there somewhere and I have to find him. It's my fault he's missing..." She squeezed my shoulders, pulling my head to rest against her shoulder.

"It wasn't your fault, Thaladir. It was an accident. Beside's from what I've heard, Legolas is choosing not to be found. He could come back if he wanted to."

I nodded, knowing she was right. But she didn't see the anger in the king's eyes. The grief that tore them apart leaving nothing but empty irises. I shook my head. "Orders are orders regardless, Faervel. I have to go."

She nodded and I sat back up as Inwen came back in, bearing a plate heaped with food. I ground my teeth as my stomach churned but took it anyway, thanking her. I knew I needed to eat whether I liked it or not.

I picked up a biscuit, it turned to dust in my mouth, but I forced bite after bit down. This seemed to put both of them at ease a little. I finish the last bite and stood as they began their expostulation.

"You can't go back out there like this, Thaladir," Faervel argued. "Please, is there anything you can do? Tell him you're not fit to go out. Go see a healer perhaps, they could tell him it's not safe to send you back out with the amount of sleep you've lost." But I shook my head.

"No, trust me, I wish there was something, but something changed in the king last night. He--" I stopped, wondering if what he told me was something I really wanted them to know. Did they think the same thing? I shook my head as Faevel gestured me to continue. I sighed. "He blames me for Legolas' disappearance. He says I should have known better than to take him to a human village. And that I should have done something when the building caught fire..." I hung my head, wiping my tired eyes as I leaned against the wall.

Faevel came to stand beside me. "You don't actually believe that, do you?" she asked, her voice soft, sorrowful. "The king lost his son and needs someone to blame. Unfortunately, you are the easiest target. Legolas would never blame you for this, you know that."

I nodded, knowing she spoke the truth and straightened. "No matter who the king or the prince blame for this, the king has ordered me to find him. I have never ignored a direct order and I don't plan on this being the first."

Both of my sisters nodded, but I could see the tears the youngest held back. I pulled them both to me, holding them close, memorizing the feeling of having the last of my family close, then drew away.

"Wait," Inwen said and turned to run into the kitchen.

I watched her go and turned to Faervel, pulling her close once more. "I'll be careful. I promise."

"I know," she whispered, her voice broke though she tried her best to hide it. "But I will still worry. Send word as often as you can." I nodded with a smile and she pulled away as Iwen appeared in the doorway, a bag in her hands.

"Here," she said, handing it to me. She pulled herself up as I took it. "A little extra food for the road. I know you don't care for the provisions they pack at the stronghold."

I smiled and thanked her as I opened the door, then turned back. "Be safe, both of you. I will return as soon as I am able." I caught their eyes one last time before slipping out and shutting the door behind me.

I needed to find him, and I needed to find him quickly.