WARNING: Explicit Content (Abusive scene)

Do not read the first part of the chapter if you're uncomfortable with abusive/horrific scenes. Keep scrolling until you find the double separator (...). It's a short scroll.

Here's a summary instead: Jungkook dreamt of his past, where he was forced to participate in an abusive act.

Disclaimer: This is an insight of his past, which is necessary to understand. In no way do I acknowledge/support/encourage the behaviour in anyone. I DO NOT promote anger and hate. If you suffer from an abusive environment, please seek immediate help. If you need a friend to talk, I'm here for you.

...

The bright orange sunlight blazes in like fire in this house. I turn back to my right, where eomma Kim is sitting on her knees. A few strands of her hair fell to the side and I felt my palms gripping the shortgun tighter. I wanted so much to tie her hair back properly so it's neat. But I can't. I can't until appa Kim is done taunting her, as he usually would.

The sounds of kids playing from neighboring houses had long gone, probably since he started shouting. All I could hear now is her faint sobbings. Her shoulders shook and shuddered. The brown on the floor has droplets of her tears and again, I feel like wiping it so it's clean. But I can't. I still have to aim this perfectly to her.

My hands are shaking by the seconds. This thing is too heavy for me. Why are you so stupid?! He shouts and slaps harder on her head and I feel like crying. She shouldn't have upset him. She should've tasted the coffee first before serving it to him. She's probably too tired and forgot how he likes his coffee. What do you take me for?! Did you put poison in there to kill me??

She didn't! She's too scared to do that - stop hitting her!! And you - why are you crying?! Oh no, he's staring at me - he's coming to me! Are you not a man?? Are you stupid like her - I told you to hold it straight!! Did you forgot your lessons boy?!

I didn't - I promise I didn't! But he got to me first and I shut my eyes. The skin on my face has gotten used to his hands so much, that I couldn't feel the pain anymore. But my head hurts as it hits the floor. I hear her scream and wail but I don't dare to open my eyes. Don't touch him!! He's my boy and he needs to learn! I will teach him the same way I taught you! 

Yes, let it be me. Let him teach me. The thuds of his kicks on my legs and arms becomes softer and softer, and I lost the trigger from my finger. He'll get tired and fall asleep. When he does, we'll be okay again.

...
...

The short ring on his phone woke him up, and he opens his bleary eyes to check on it. Another job had just been posted. He looks at the clock on top. It's three minutes past two in the morning. 

Jungkook sits up and rubs his neck, feeling the slight sweat resulted from the nightmare. Dismissing it, he climbs out of his bed and into the bathroom - carrying the fragments of what he could remember. They always repeat themselves unwelcomely...

Once he's done with his business, he lies back down and continue to check on his phone - properly this time...with priorities.

Lalisa:
I got home safely

Lalisa:
Hey
Jungkook
Hey

Lalisa:
You're probably busy
Ignore me

Lalisa:
Or sleeping
You did look a bit tired just now

Lalisa:
Goodnight Jungkook

Ahh shit! I was waiting for her texts and I fell asleep! Ugh...

Hi Lisa
I'm so sorry, I fell asleep
I guess I was kinda tired

From all that stalking and all the overthinking!

Please don't get upset, it wasn't intentional
You're probably already asleep
So I'll call you tomorrow

Lalisa:
Hello!

Oh...why is she still up?

Lalisa:
I started binge-watching a drama and I'm now on the 12th episode
in case you're wondering why I'm not asleep yet
It's not cus I waited for you

Damn - why is she so cute?!

Of course not

Lalisa:
But since you're already up, you can keep me company :)

Would it bother you though?
You need to concentrate on the drama, no?

Lalisa:
I'm good at multitasking
And I don't take no for an answer

The last line got him to laugh a little.

Bossy
Cute :)

He braved himself to sent those.

Lalisa:
:) :) :) :) :)
Thanks!
You're cute too

Oh...she thinks I'm cute? Is that a good thing? It must be! Better than her being scared of me right?

Lalisa:
I didn't get a chance to thank you for the cake
and cat food earlier
I know I've said this but I'll say it again
I didn't do it on purpose, I really forgot to withdraw some cash
I usually use my cards
I promise
My cats are grateful too
You saved their tummy tonight
I promise it's my treat next time!

Is he grinning like a fool - who cares?!

It's no problem at all Lisa
I'm happy I could help your cats

Lalisa:
Are you always this polite?
I think we've become good friends now
You can talk to me like you talk to your friends

Mmm...tricky...I don't have any friends - how do good friends talk to each other? 

Alright cool!

Wait - that sounds awkward!

Cools!

Is that even a word??

Sure thing!!!

Too many exclamation marks - I sound way too excited -

Lalisa:
Okay wow
Calm down haha

Jungkook sighed, hanging his head on the wooden bed frame. You're so stupid -

Lalisa:
How ever you're comfortable with
It's fine by me really

You're so nice...I'm so lucky to have met you. He clutched on the shirt across his chest, feeling heavy at the sudden thought. 

Thank you
I'm sorry
I'm not used to this

Lalisa:
Used to what?

Just tell her! She's gonna wonder more anytime soon anyway - just be honest now before you make a fool of yourself. Not like you haven't already done that -

Messaging a girl
I mean, talking to a girl
I'm not used to it

Lalisa:
Oh come on
You don't have to lie
I'm sure you talk to girls all the time
You talked just fine on the night we met
I'm not implying anything by the way
It's only normal

Is it? The only women he talked to were the ones he met at bars...and it's never this long...just a few minutes, long enough for them to invite him to their place - but yes, he was talking normally when she was treating him that night. It's different though - he wasn't this nervous that night! Maybe because she was just a stranger then. Or maybe he was brave because there were still some alcohol in him. Is that what she wants him to be?

You make me nervous

Wait - sent?? Did I actually, unconsciously typed it and send it to her?? Fuck - how do I delete this - can I delete this?!!

Lalisa:
I do?

Yes...yes you do! Damn it! Why Jungkook - why did you send that -

Lalisa:
You're quite intimidating too
But maybe it's cus I don't know you that well yet
We should hang out more
So we won't feel nervous with each other

Jungkook sits up straight. It's Sunday...she doesn't have classes on weekends. Would it be too soon to ask?

Lalisa:
What are your plans for tomorrow?

He smiled at the question. He was going to ask her first, but he won't dwell on that fact. 

I'm going out with you

...