SHOW 12 - House of Blues, Boston, Massachusetts

October 31st

The last week had gone by in a blur. A surreal, heavy metal, spellbound blur.

There was something in the air every time Devon and I were in the same room. I could almost see it - it glistened and glowed in the dark like the aroma of a magic spell. And when he sang on stage, he always managed to find my eyes, making me feel like he was singing just to me. Like he wanted to sing to just me.

We'd arrived in Boston overnight, Halloween was tomorrow, and I'd been so wrapped up in the realization that it was also our last show of the tour that I still had no costume. The House of Blues was essentially turning into a club for a Halloween party after the show - which by my now well-educated guess wouldn't be until at least 11 PM, and I wasn't sure I could hang like I could in college for a party like this. I had to call for reinforcements while I went out for a hot girl walk for an iced maple cinnamon latte (with very necessary extra espresso).

"So, you're ready to admit it, are you?"

I groaned. "Define admit."

Lyanna snickered behind her hand, and in the background of our Facetime call I could see the golden red leaves of the trees in City Hall Park where we normally took our lunch when it was nice out. Her braids were gone, her hair now styled in short, natural curls, reminding me of just how much time had gone by since I'd actually seen her.

"Oh my god don't be so coy!" She pushed her black Prada sunglasses up the bridge of her nose. "You're acting like I'm asking you to give away a vintage Fendi baguette."

"I would be inclined to actually do that if I knew it would solve all this," I surrendered a sigh as I slowed my walk along the clean city sidewalks, fallen leaves dancing around my brown Chelsea boots in a light breeze. "We have one show left, and I guess I'm just worried that our arrival back to New York also means an arrival back to reality - a reality where Devon and I are just not compatible. And I don't mean physically, because...I admit, he's...frustratingly good looking. Especially right after he's showered and his hair is still damp so it kind of curls around his face, and he smells fresh and clean like the air after it rains, and..."

I paused when I realized Lyanna had just let me yap on about the way Devon looked fresh out of the shower, grinning the entire time. She was just like Evie. Those two would be great friends, which is why I should never introduce them. The scheming would be too powerful.

"No, no, don't mind me," she shook her head with a tight smile. "Please continue on about how not compatible two people who are very attracted to each other are."

"I said it wasn't a physical thing." I took a long sip of my coffee before surrendering another groan. "Lyanna, we're so different. I mean, staggeringly so, like oil and water. I don't think we could be more different if we tried."

"And yet it seems like you two really understand each other," her voice softened, and so did the smile she offered me. "When two people are different, being understood is what matters."

"When did you get so wise?" I smirked at her.

"I've always been wise," she quipped. "You've just never been in a position to take advantage of that."

I let out a deep sigh as I found a park bench similar to the one Lyanna was sitting on 200 miles away. In the moment, she felt much further. "I can't pretend I understand what it's like to be raised the way he was. It's like he was kept in a cage. A beautiful cage, sure, but it's still a cage. Sometimes I think he still lives in it, and I just want to shake him because I don't think he understands that he doesn't have to anymore. Like, fuck his parents and all those people who made him feel that way. Respectfully."

"Wow," Lyanna shook her head, still grinning. "I've never heard you get so heated about other people before. You like everybody."

"I don't like people who bring others down for no reason," I grumbled, putting my coffee to the side so I could pick up a big red leaf that had landed on my lap. I twirled its stem between my fingers as I continued. "Devon is one of the most insecure people I've ever met, and it's insane because he's also one of the most talented people I've ever met. He's been made to feel like he isn't. He's not happy, even Evie knows it. And oh my god Lyanna he's got the most beautiful smile too. I mean it could light up a whole city. But it's like he thinks he doesn't even deserve to be happy, and he does. I just...I'd do anything to get him to understand that."

Yapping really might kill me one day.

"Sienna baby, I hate to break it to you, but that's love." Lyanna's mouth twisted back up into a more cunning smirk. "L-O-V-E love."

I felt my heart slam in my chest, and it jarred me so much I dropped the leaf. "What? No. I've never even been in love. That's not..."

Well, that was true, so what would I really know? Was love wanting someone else's success and happiness more than your own? When Devon smiled and it felt like even if the world ended I'd be okay, was that love?

Lyanna arched a perfectly sculpted skeptical eyebrow at me. "Uh huh. You were saying...?"

"Okay whatever." I held a hand up, trembling from what I'd hoped was just the caffeine I'd sucked down. "The minutiae of it doesn't even really matter since I do know Devon well enough to know he will never make the first move."

Lyanna shrugged. "So you do it."

"Yeah, yeah," I waved her off. "Easier said than done"

I watched Lyanna scoot forward on the bench, giving a sideways glare to someone who dared sit down next to her and promptly got up. "Okay okay okay. Let's look at the facts. 1, Evie gave you her blessing which in this day and age, having the best friend blessing is like being given the crown jewels, and 2, she basically implied that Devon feels the same...in his own weird Prince of Darkness way. 3, Halloween is the best night of the year to make a move. Everyone's drinking and in costume and there's something about the mixture of all of that and whatever's in the air on Halloween night that makes people way more uninhibited than they normally are. That's your chance."

I hated how much sense it made, but Lyanna had a way of making you feel more capable than you thought you were. And yes, I could no longer deny that I wanted this. I wanted him.

"So now we've finally arrived at the reason I called you in the first place: a costume that I don't have."

Lyanna tapped her purple acrylics against her chin. "I mean, you could really go all-in and just be Polly Pocket."

I chuckled as I watched two little kids in Paw Patrol costumes run in front of me, hand in hand. "Trust me, I've already thought about that, but it's not like Barbie where everyone just knows that's what you are. What am I supposed to do, wear a nametag that says Hi my name is Polly Pocket?"

"No, good point." Lyanna shook her head, and I could tell the gears were turning as she pursed her deep crimson lips. "You know what? Fuck it, pull a Mean Girls. Just do lingerie and animal ears. You've got the ass and the tits to pull that off. Make that boy beg."

"That's absolutely insane." I barked out a laugh. "But it might actually work."

Lyanna looked down at her Michele watch. "I have to go back to the office, but when I see you in person on Monday, I want all the dirty details, and I mean all of them. Like...I wanna know if he has tattoos on his-"

"Okay, okay. I get it." I shooed her away. "I've got lingerie and bunny ears to find, apparently."

⋆ ★

Later that afternoon, Evie pulled me aside backstage. None of us had come in costume, since it would be too cumbersome to run sound check and everything all dressed up in god knows what. I also wasn't entirely okay with walking around at 3 PM in stilettos and bunny ears with my ass hanging out of a very revealing sequin bodysuit. Although, I actually had no idea what anyone's costume was, but that was okay, since there was no way I wasn't keeping mine a surprise too.

"I need to tell you something," Evie whispered harshly, despite the fact there was plenty of noise and commotion going on backstage for nobody to have heard us even if we were talking at normal volume. "It's Devon's birthday."

I shot her a puzzled look. "Like...today? Right now?"

Evie nodded with pinched lips.

I stood on my toes to glance around for him, but he was nowhere to be found. I cracked a faint grin. "Why does Devon's birthday being on Halloween make more sense than like, anything else in the universe?"

Evie mirrored my grin, and I could tell up until then she'd been uncharacteristically tense. "You mean, almost as much sense as the fact that he hates making a big deal out of his birthday?"

I snorted. "Which means you're absolutely going to make a big deal about it."

"Absolutely. Except this is so not my area of expertise. But you, little miss publicity queen..." Evie waved her hand around, and I got the message.

"Right." I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose. "Well...maybe it's really simple. It's not like we can get him a gift or anything, it's way too late for that."

Evie scoffed. "And what do you even get someone whose trust fund is worth more money than all of us will make in our entire lives combined?"

"You get them intangible things." I felt the gears start turning the way I was sure Lyanna's had earlier, except of course mine was for much better causes. I glanced around backstage again, where Gareth was mid setup for his drum set. When Devon walked by him, he dropped everything and tackled Devon into a hug. I could tell Devon tried to wiggle his way out of it, but Gareth just squeezed him tighter. Eventually, Devon's body went limp, and I couldn't help but smile as he surrendered and put his head on Gareth's shoulder. They bickered like brothers, but they also loved each other like brothers.

Then it hit me. What does Devon want more than anything in the world? To be seen, and noticed, and loved for what he was.

I turned back to Evie and smiled. "I have an idea. I need to find Jeremy."

"Jeremy?" She furrowed her brows at me. "Why?"

I dipped my head close to Evie's and kept my voice down like she had before. Except this was a secret with security clearance that needed to rival the Pentagon's. "Because after Devon does One of Us with Beyond the Pines, Jeremy is going to keep him on stage and have the entire audience sing Happy Birthday to him. I know it might embarrass him at first, but I think hearing all those people show their appreciation for him...might make him feel pretty good."

I paused and pulled away from Evie, hoping she couldn't see the blush spreading through my cheeks. "But you tell me, you're his best friend. You know him better than I do."

Evie put her hands up in surrender. "You know him just as well Sienna, whether you realize it or not."

So we snuck away to go find Jeremy and loop him in on the plan. He happily obliged, like a proud big brother. As the band finished up sound check, it was time to post one last cover song poll. It was actually kind of bittersweet. I'd miss doing that.

Of course, Devon being Devon just had to mess things up for me.

"No," he shook his head at me when I asked him for song suggestions. "I have one already picked out."

He'd spread himself out on the big black leather couch in the band's green room, and I'd be lying if I said I didn't rake my gaze over his body, fixating on the way his white t-shirt pulled taught against his stomach and his chest when he breathed. In certain clothes it was noticeable that he'd gained a little weight this past month, and it looked great on him. He was healthy and strong looking, even though I was almost certain he'd argue with me about that.

"Do you now?" I arched a challenging eyebrow at him. "And you don't feel inclined to share with the class?"

To my surprise, a playful smirk pulled at his lips. "Mind your business, Polly Pocket. By the way, is that gonna be your Halloween costume?"

I wanted to dig into him, but I stopped myself. It was his birthday (even if he didn't know that I knew) and I was just going to give this to him. Besides, I had to start getting my costume together, which included hair and makeup and a sweet-smelling body glitter that was almost guaranteed to make some slack jawed idiots drool. So I let him have his smug moment now. It would be my turn soon.

So instead, I teased him with a wicked grin as I took a step back. "Guess you'll have to wait and see. What about you? You gonna be a vampire?"

"Nope." He shook his head, keeping his unsurprising poker face stone cold. "Guess you'll have to wait and see, too."

I gave him one more smirk before backing out of the green room, bumping my backside right into Raf in the hallway.

"Oh Jesus, sorry," I flushed and spun around too quickly, and he reached for my forearms to steady me. He had his usual flannel shirt on but an added accessory of a comically large cowboy hat. "Cowboy coming to my rescue, huh?"

Raf gave me an amused side eye. "What do you mean? I always dress like this."

We shared a laugh, and he let go of my arms. I felt like I hadn't seen him all week. He was being dodgy with all of us, and I guess it was just like me to start caring about everyone in this godforsaken band. "You doing okay?"

"Me? Just fine," he shrugged. Unconvincing, but it wasn't really my place to push him. "Are you?"

"Of course," I forced out a chuckle. "Never better."

Knowing what I knew about Raf, he probably thought I was just as unconvincing. But knowing him like that did give me enough confidence to confide in him.

"I know it's Devon's birthday," I told him in a hushed voice. "I asked Jeremy to keep him on stage so the crowd can sing him Happy Birthday. Evie thinks it's a good idea, but you know him better than anyone. Do you think he's going to hate it?"

Something in his dark brown eyes lit up - something that might have resembled relief. Raf was more of a father to Devon than his own father was, and knowing he wasn't the only person who cared for Devon must have meant more to him than maybe I even understood. I tried not to let the feeling constrict my throat as I waited for his response.

But the smile Raf gave me was more wistful than I anticipated, and relief rolled off my shoulders. "Yeah, he might at first. But I think when the initial embarrassment wears off, he'll really appreciate it. It's a nice thing you're doing."

I smiled at Raf in gratitude, and he gave my hands a quick squeeze before walking away. "Good luck."

⋆ ★

"I think I'm starting to regret this."

Evie cackled. "And I think I'm going to have to plan my best friend's funeral. He might have a heart attack when he sees you."

I heaved out a sigh as I spun around in the bathroom mirror to assess my costume again. I'd taken inspiration from a combination of Elle Woods and Regina George for a Playboy Bunny-esque look, putting together what I could find from various department stores in Manchester. I had a pink sequin bodysuit that was high cut in the leg and low cut in the chest, white fishnet tights adorned with little rhinestones, and pink silky bunny ears that refused to stay upright.

Evie had come in to help me secure the little white puff ball for the tail. She was Beatrix Kiddo from Kill Bill, complete with the full yellow leather getup and a katana at her hip (to be determined if it was actually real or not).

"You don't think it's too much?" I asked her after I'd spun back around.

Evie pressed her hands together in front of her mouth. "As someone who is just as attracted to women as Devon is, I think my opinion is valid when I say I would literally get on my knees for you. Do with that what you will."

"Well that's flattering, thank you." I gave her a coy grin. "You're still not gonna tell me about this secret cover song are you?"

Evie shook her head. "No way. Although, I will be relieved at the end of the night when I no longer have to keep anyone's silly secrets. All I can tell you is that his costume and the cover song go hand in hand."

"That's way too vague to be any help," I chuckled and shook my head, already feeling the ears start to slip. That was going to bother me all night, I could tell.

Evie stood rigid straight and gave me a comical salute. "See ya out there."

Right, I did still have a job to do. With Evie's blessing, I felt a little less self-conscious walking around in lingerie and animal ears as I walked with my head up out into the venue, where I was reminded that this was not the scene from Legally Blonde - it was in fact Halloween, and everyone was in costume.

The House of Blues felt like the right place to end the tour. Beyond the Pines were from Boston after all, and after doing a little digging I learned that this was where they played one of their first shows - as an opening act. And after the show was a Halloween afterparty and a celebration to close out the tour.

Normally, The Green Inferno opened with Concrete Jungle, but when the stage went dark and Clark began his opening riffs, I didn't recognize the music. I started filming with my phone just in time for the lights to come on and illuminate Devon in the center, where clearly the majority of the crowd clearly knew what his costume was, clad in a neon yellow jumpsuit and big mirrored shield sunglasses.

"Oh my god," I grinned to myself. "It's the guy from the fucking Goofy Movie."

But as usual, Devon's version was better, and even though I'd strategically placed myself where he couldn't see me, my heart still ached to feel like he was singing just to me.

One way or another

Together's where we both belong

If we listen to each other's heart

We'll find we're never too far apart

And maybe love is the reason why

For the first time ever we're seeing it eye to eye

I couldn't ignore how intentional the song choice felt. Sure it was Disney, but this was Devon - everything had meaning, and it supercharged my heart as I waited for him backstage, bouncing on the toes of my glittery stilettos.

"You're full of surprises Devon McCall," I said to him as he came off stage, still a vision even sweaty and in a ridiculous neon jumpsuit. It hugged every dip and angle of him perfectly, leaving almost as little to the imagination as my costume did. I had to gulp down my heart. "You being Powerline for Halloween was not on my tour bingo card."

"And you're, uh..." He cleared his throat as he rubbed the back of his neck. He was still wearing those mirrored sunglasses, but it wasn't hard to see the way he raked his gaze over me. Heat bloomed in my chest in a ridiculously satisfying way. "I mean, you look, um...wow. You're..." he pointed up to my ears. "Bunny?"

"Yeah," I grinned wide and confident as I nodded. "You like?"

I watched his Adam's apple bob behind his neck tattoos as he nodded eagerly. "Very...glittery."

Evie came up to us and snaked her arms around Devon's torso. "Alright buddy, let's go wipe the drool off your chin."

"I am not drooling," Devon groaned as Evie led him away, giving me a quick wink before she left.

While the crew began preparations for the set changeover, I made eye contact with Jeremy, and he nodded in understanding, confirming our sneaky little game plan.

"Oh no," Kevin came up to me wearing a grin and a sweater that looked like it belonged to Freddy Krueger. "I know it's Halloween, but murder by looks is still illegal."

I rolled my eyes and playfully shoved his arm. "Don't be an ass."

"I'm not, I'm not." He held his hands up in surrender, still grinning. "You look fucking gorgeous, and he's an idiot."

"I don't know what on earth you're talking about." I casually shrugged. "I just like Halloween."

"Okay Sienna," he nodded, matching his tone to reflect my painful casualty. "Good luck."

Evie and I reconvened in the barricaded off section of the floor of the venue, joined by Clark (in a bright orange t-shirt that said THIS IS MY HALLOWEEN COSTUME - didn't expect any less from him), and who I knew was Gareth in a big black bat looking costume, only because he somehow wore that behind the drum set the entire show.

"What the hell are you supposed to be, anyway?" I asked Gareth.

"Mothman," he replied, his voice muffled underneath the giant fuzzy black head he wore. It even had big red eyes and antennae. He flapped his Mothman wings for good measure. "But like, cute Mothman."

"I see," I nodded, pinching my lips together.

"Nervous?" Evie asked me.

"What? No." I shook my head, but she was unconvinced. "I just hope he doesn't hate me after this."

"He won't." Evie reached down and squeezed my hand. "He could never."

We all enjoyed each other's company watching Beyond the Pines set, and Devon got another loud roar of cheers when he came on stage to perform One of Us with them. After he took his bow (and nearly lost those Powerline sunglasses), Jeremy pulled on the sleeve of his jumpsuit and kept him on stage. The panic on Devon's face was almost immediate. He was a smart guy - he knew what was going on.

"Devon, I just wanted to say thank you for sharing the stage with us on our last tour," Jeremy began, and applause and cheers immediately followed. "You are what I would consider a generational talent, and we know metal music is in good hands with you guys."

We all cheered and hooted and hollered in the obnoxious kind of way that you do for your friends, and it got the crowd to join in too.

"Thank you, that...that means a lot," Devon said into his mic, and to the untrained ear he sounded normal, but to someone who'd been paying an ungodly amount of attention to his voice lately, the cracking was subtle, but there.

"A little bunny told me that it was your birthday, so..." Jeremy gestured towards the crowd, and he made sure to stop and wink at me. "If you guys can help us out here."

The band started playing, and all 2,000 people sang Happy Birthday to Devon.

Devon put his hands to his face, bashfully trying to hide the blush I knew was spreading across his cheeks. When he put his hands down and looked out at the crowd, he found my eyes almost immediately. He shook his head at me, but when I beamed up at him, he smiled back as he laughed, wide and white teeth and all. It felt like my heart was going to explode.

It was well after 11 when Beyond the Pines finished their set (and an extra encore song), but the afterparty was just getting started. The music switched over to something more appropriate for a club, and Devon finally joined the rest of us at the bar at the back of the venue.

"Where have you been?" I had to lean up and shout into his ear.

"Resurrecting myself after dying of embarrassment," he replied, but when I pulled away, a faint smirk graced his lips.

"This should help. It's whiskey." I handed him a shot glass and took the other for myself. "Happy Birthday, Prince of Darkness."

"Thanks, Polly Pocket."

We clinked our glasses together before throwing our shots back, and it didn't burn nearly as much as I thought it would going down. He'd taken his sunglasses off, and he kept his gaze on me as he put his glass down on the bar, his eyes dark and glazed over with something unfamiliar. It set my nerves on edge, and I ordered us another necessary round, and we threw those back quickly too. Then one more, for good measure.

I was normally pretty self-assured when it came to guys - at least enough that I didn't need whiskey confidence. But this was Devon, and when you wanted something as badly as I wanted him, you had to rewire your nerves a little bit so you didn't short circuit at the sight of them in front of you, or the way their hands uneasily found the place on your waist you wanted to be touched as they dipped their head down to whisper in your ear.

"How am I supposed to act around you when you look like this?"

Lyanna's words rang in my ears. Make him beg.

"Act however you want," I replied, standing on my toes so that I could gently brush my lips against his ear. I felt him buckle and stumble into me, and I had to press my hands into his chest to get him back upright.

"Sorry, sorry." He raked his hair back with a shaky hand. "The whiskey's getting to me, I guess."

"Yeah, me too." I nodded slowly, glancing around the venue until I zeroed in on double doors on the other side of the floor with EXIT illuminated above it in bright red.

"You wanna get some air?" I asked him, looking up at him in hopes he could see the implications glistening in my eyes. Now or never, Devon McCall.

After what felt like an eternity, he nodded. I took him by the hand and led him through the crowd and outside.

The chill of the night hit me immediately as we found ourselves on a small deck jutting out from the side of the venue. During the summer months it looked like it might have been used as an additional bar area with stacks of chairs and tables off in the corner, and the string lights that hung above were dimmed.

I hoisted myself up onto the ledge of the decking, mostly so I didn't feel so small beside him. He leaned back against it and tilted his head upwards, like he was counting stars in the clear night sky.

The anticipatory tension was maddening. We knew why we were both out there, but both of us were unwilling to jump first, like we were standing on the edge of the cliff waiting to see who'd say "on the count of three."

"I liked the song you did," I told him, almost desperate to fill the silence. "Didn't expect it like at all, but it was pretty great."

"You did? Did you like, um..." he paused and rubbed the side of his face. "God this is so stupid."

I nudged his shoulder. "What? Tell me."

He tilted his head to look over at me, his expression soft as his cheeks turned pink. "I guess I just wanted to know if you...liked the way I looked up there."

I gave him a playful smirk. "Devon, is this you asking me if I'm attracted to you?"

"Well, uh..." he dropped his gaze down to his sneakers. "Yeah."

I almost had to laugh, because how could he not think that I wasn't. But this was Devon, and so he needed to hear it. "I am."

"Okay...good." He cleared his throat. "The feeling is mutual."

"Good." I smiled at him. "Glad we cleared that up."

Devon sighed as he pushed himself off the railing, turning so that he stood in front of me, resting his hands on either side of me. His thumbs were just close enough to my thighs that I could feel goosebumps start to prickle on my skin in anticipation. God damn it just touch me already.

"It was you, wasn't it?" he asked. "Who told Jeremy it was my birthday?"

I offered him a coy shrug.

He blew out a breath as he shook his head. "You didn't have to do that, Sienna."

"I know. I wanted to."

A breeze blew through us, and whether it was on purpose or purely instinctual, he moved forward until he was pressed against my knees. I opened them slightly so he could stand between them, and he took the invitation. It felt like my blood was pumping through my body at mach speed, and suddenly I was very warm.

"Well...thank you." His voice was soft against the silence of the night, and we were so close to the edge now that when I looked at him, I heard the call of the void. I wanted to fall into him entirely.

"Can I give you your present now?" I asked him.

He chuckled. "Haven't you done enough?"

"Never." I shook my head. "You have to close your eyes though."

After a moment trying to study my expression, as if he truly and genuinely didn't know what was about to happen, he did as I asked. I felt electricity surge through my body as I reached up to touch his cheek, and he flinched almost imperceptibly at my touch, but I didn't let go.

"You're so handsome. You really are." I spoke softly, hoping maybe it would land soft enough on him to actually accept it.

He sighed wistfully in response, and with his eyes still closed he leaned his head into my hand, then brought his own hand up to hold mine. Why was I just realizing now how much bigger his hands were than mine?

With as much assuredness as I could muster, I brought my other hand to the other side of his face and guided him forward, slowly and methodically, giving him every opportunity to back away if he wanted to until there was no space between us and the inevitable.

I kissed him tenderly at first, his lips far softer than I imagined, and there was only a fraction of a second of hesitation - maybe more like shock - from him before he leaned into me, fully committed.

The entire world seemed to fall away, and suddenly no matter how close I'd pulled him in wasn't close enough as I moved my hands to the back of his neck, threading my fingers through licks and curls of his dark hair. His touch was gentle as he brought his hands up to cup my cheeks, but it ignited something carnal and potent in me. I'd kissed guys before, but this was the kind of kiss that burned you alive, and I was sure they could smell the smoke all over Boston.

He moaned when I opened my mouth to him, and I could taste whiskey on his tongue as he ran it eagerly along the inside of my cheek. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought about this for weeks, and what it would be like to taste him in my mouth and feel his body under my hands. This was nothing like I imagined - this was better. Much better.

He moved his hands down to my waist, gently guiding me to wrap my legs around him. His fingers brushed my fishnet clad thigh, and the unexpected warmth of his skin on mine made me flinch. My bunny ears went sliding off my head and off the deck, but it was an inevitable sacrifice I was willing to make.

"Sorry," he pulled away just enough to whisper an apology against my lips. "I'm sorry. I'm not good at this. Never have been."

"Don't," I whispered back, reaching up to gently curl a finger around a lock of his hair at his temple. "You're great. You're so fucking great, and don't say that you're not."

Devon took a measured pause as what I'd just said to him sunk in, his dark eyes glazed over with liquor and just a hint of disbelief. He thought he was hearing things.

"I don't know what I did to deserve you." He finally breathed out in a low, husky voice. "Because I don't."

"That's not true." I cupped his face with my hands and pressed my forehead to his. "You deserve the world, Devon."

When that was truly what you wanted for someone, that was love. I was sure of it now.

Our lips collided again, with more fervor and more urgency. Something deeply lustful rolled through me, and I had to settle for gripping the fabric on the shoulders of his costume with white knuckles as I was overcome with the urge to tear it off entirely. Whatever feeling it was, he felt it too as he slowly, almost uneasily snaked his hand up my waist to settle underneath my breast. I took his hand in mine and moved it up, giving him permission to slide his hand into the front cut of my bodysuit and give my breast a gentle squeeze. My nerves burned, and fire spread through my entire body, settling down at the pit of my stomach and in between my legs. In that moment I thought I'd go mad if I didn't have him right then and there.

"Devon! Devon!"

We separated with a jolt like we'd just electrocuted each other, whatever moment we were having fizzling out into nothing.

"Oh you've got to be fucking..." he exhaled into my neck, then spun around on his heels, keeping his body in between my knees. "What?"

Gareth came galloping up to us, flapping his stupid Mothman wings and seemingly drunkenly oblivious to what had just transpired. "Encore! Birthday shots! So many things to do!"

"Okay, okay," Devon groaned in surrender.

I looked up at him, his face flushed and his hair tousled, and reached up to brush a few stray locks off his forehead. This was still his night, and I didn't want to steal it all away from him so quickly. We had time.

"Go enjoy your birthday," I told him with a soft smile.

"I already did."

He took hold of my waist, gently lifting me off the deck railing and onto the ground.

"You coming?" he asked.

"In a minute, I actually do need some air. But..." I rocked forward on my toes and kissed his cheek. "To be continued."

"Okay," he blew out a breath and nodded. "Yeah."

As he backed away, he nearly tripped over a chair on the deck, and laughter came lurching out of me. His face turned siren red as he shook his head and groaned before retreating inside.

I wasn't sure how much longer I stood outside, counting stars and feeling my body buzz with warmth even though it was cold.

⋆ ★

i think this is a new slow burn record for me - 85k words before a first kiss. WOW.

ANYWAY this long of a chapter gets TWO gifs - it was way longer than i anticipated but i didn't want to break it up and delay this any more. i hope it was worth the wait! i've had this whole thing planned for soooo long and i'm not gonna lie i agonized over it quite a bit because i really wanted it to be perfect and make up for how long i made y'all wait. 

you think we're done? we're far from done. we're back in NYC for the remainder of the story, and there's still plenty of nonsense to go down. would love to know your thoughts! <3

PS; i've linked the actual pop punk cover of I2I if you're interested, it has in fact been done already :)