Six lanes of traffic were backed up four miles according to my GPS. The screen displayed the interstate-turned-parking lot I was on as a red line with a caution diamond ahead, indicating there had been an accident. I turned the radio up, hoping loud rock music would distract me from everything cluttering up my thoughts. I decided it had been too long since I'd attended a concert and told myself I should find out when my favorite band, who happened to be Chicago natives, would be making an appearance in town again. I'd get tickets for Monica and me.

Twenty minutes and one nasty bird poop splatter on my windshield later, my lane had only moved about a half mile. I could see smoke in the sky up ahead and a loud honking and sirens startled me as two ambulances attempted to weave through traffic. The sky was dark with rainclouds and I wished it would go ahead and pour already. This day couldn't possibly get any drearier.

I stared at the vehicle in front of me where a man and woman sat in the front seat laughing, talking and occasionally kissing. I envied them. They looked so happy, not even caring about how late they were probably going to be for wherever they were headed. I craved a relationship like that. I thought I'd had that with Derek but I'd obviously not been in my right mind. I was so angry with myself for wasting a big part of my life on him. I wanted to hate him so bad. I wanted to go back in time and keep myself from ever meeting him. He was a black mark on my life and I wanted him erased.

The car behind me honked, interrupting my thoughts. I realized the traffic in front of me had moved but I hadn't been paying attention. The woman behind me made sure I noticed her middle finger in the air. As soon as I could take the next exit, I did just that, breathing a sigh of relief once I'd gotten away from the mess in my rearview mirror.

After I left Monica's around nine with a stomach full of pancakes and blueberries, I decided to stop by the firm and grab some files from my office. I had a hearing to attend Monday morning and since I'd been off my game the past few days, I thought it would be a good idea to refresh my memory of the case.

It was a short drive to the office after I got off the highway. There were only two other attorneys working, judging by the lonely blue and white Toyotas in our section of the parking garage.

Once I reached my office I sat down at the desk and started picking through the folders I'd left beside my iMac. I pulled out Regina Evans' file and set the rest aside.

I was in and out of the firm within six minutes, giving Claire an awkward wave on my way out. She looked down her nose at me through think-framed glasses, giving me a once-over and nodding. I trekked the long distance back to my SUV, tossing the folder into the passenger seat and pulling my hair into a sloppy ponytail while I stood beside the vehicle with the door open.

"You weren't there when I woke up this morning," came a deep voice behind me.

I stiffened, caught off guard. His boots created an echo through the garage when he moved toward me. How had I not noticed him walk up?

"I know," I said simply, trying to sound calm and collected.

Nick stepped into view. His arms were crossed over his chest accentuating his biceps and forearms. He wore a tight fitting navy shirt and black pants. His shirt was untucked, covering an object on his right hip that I assumed was a pistol. Despite how irritated he looked, he seemed more hurt than anything.

"What did I do wrong, Carrie?" he asked, brows furrowed.

I looked at him confused. I'd up and left in the middle of the night and he was asking what he did wrong? I'd expected him to know what I'd done and scream at me for rifling through his things. I'd expected him to tell me how epically illegal it is for someone who isn't FBI to see that file. Apparently he had no idea I knew and thought I'd left because he'd fucked up somehow.

"Nothing," I shook my head, closing the folder I'd been looking through.

He began tapping his boot heel on the cement making a clicking sound. "Why don't I believe that?" His words were laced with anger and guilt.

I didn't know how to answer. I didn't want him to think he'd done something wrong, but how could I possibly tell him what the real reason I'd left was.

"I don't know."

He cut me a glare, eyes darkening. "I thought you were staying the night. You could have told me you wanted to leave. You didn't have to sneak out."

"I'm sorry." My words were barely audible.

"Are you?" He looked pained. "I felt like shit this morning because I thought I'd done something to make you leave. Did I?"

I shook my head slowly.

"Then what the hell happened, Carrie?" He threw his hands up. "Why'd you leave?"

This was it. I couldn't fathom getting through this conversation without telling Nick the truth. I was sick of pretending I didn't know and wishing I knew more. Now would have to be the point in which I discovered whether or not I was just a chess piece in the FBI's game. I would find out if I actually meant something to Nick or if his actions had all been a façade.

"I went into your office last night," I started. "I got the keys from your nightstand."

His eyes widened and I could see his jaw tightening. He was worried. Worried that his secrets had been uncovered. Worried that I knew too much.

"Those doors were locked for a reason," he said in a voice that grew raspier with each syllable.

I nodded, leaning against the door. "Oh, I know. You didn't want me to find your file on Derek. You didn't want me to know the FBI is investigating him for embezzlement and that I'm suspected of being his accomplice. You didn't want me to know that you've been playing me this entire time just to solve your stupid case!"

Nick looked shocked. He took a step back and I almost thought he was going to walk away. His eyes flashed an emotion I couldn't decipher. He stayed quiet long enough to make me wish I'd waited until a better time to admit that I was onto him.

"You shouldn't have gone through that folder," he said quietly, looking down at his boots to avoid my gaze.

"When were you going tell me you were an FBI agent?" I snapped, slamming my door for emphasis.

Nick groaned and ran a shaky hand through his hair. "Carrie, you don't-"

"Understand?" I raised my voice. "I understand fine, Nick! You lied to me. You used me. You fucked with my emotions and made me think you actually gave a damn for a day! All for some stupid investigation into my ex-fiancé that I didn't even know about until Wednesday!"

He frowned, first in hurt and then quickly becoming confusion. "Ex-fiancé?"

Was that all he'd paid attention to out of everything I'd just said? "Yes." I waved my hand, dismissing that subject.

Nick sauntered towards me, resting a hand on the hood of my SUV. "Carrie..."

"Why am I a suspect?" I demanded.

He leaned his side up against the vehicle, only the side mirror separating us. His eyes bore into mine for the longest time before he moved again. He reached out, placing his hands on either side of my waist and pulled me towards him. Contrary to my exasperation, I began to relax at the familiar feeling of his hands on my body. I tried to look anywhere but his eyes and focused on some graffiti decorating part of the garage wall to the right.

"You're not," he said in almost a whisper.

I frowned. That didn't make sense. "But the file said-"

"I know what the file said," Nick cut me off, squeezing my hips lightly. "You were at first. We know Derek has an accomplice. It's customary to look into his significant other because that's often who it is. I know you didn't have any part in it though."

I could feel my rapid heartbeat starting to relax once he said that. It was a relief to know the FBI wasn't actively investigating me. I was still hurt, however.

"Was that the only reason you talked to me in the first place?" I asked, pulling out of his grasp. "Did you only pay attention to me so you could cross me off your suspect list? Did you pretend to care about me so you could finish your investigation?"

Nick's eyes showed a flash of panic as he quickly shook his head. He inched closer so that we were just inches apart.

"No," he breathed. "That's not it at all."

I stepped back, trying not to trip as I attempted to back away from him. I felt claustrophobic.

"Really?" I watched him step forward, matching each step I took back. "Because it sure feels that way. It feels like all you did was use me. Did you expect me to know everything and tell you all about Derek and his secrets?"

"The first day, and about half of the second day, yes," Nick admitted. "At first, I thought you did know everything and I expected to pull some information out of you, but it didn't take long for me to realize you had no idea what Derek was doing."

"So you used me at first and then you stopped using me when you realized I was of no value to your investigation?" I snapped, continuing to back away from him.

"You make it sound a lot worse when you put it like that, but I guess so. Yes," he sighed, hanging his head in shame. "But you mean-"

I could feel my blood start to boil. "If you say I mean something to you, I will smack the living shit out of you!"

"Go ahead," Nick shrugged when I felt my back hit the cold cement wall behind me. "I won't stop you."

I had the sudden urge to slap him repeatedly until I couldn't raise my hand anymore. I was so angry and so hurt. I felt like both Derek and Nick had only used me the entire time I'd known them. Derek with his cheating and Nick with his secrets... How could I ever know who to trust if everyone turned out to have some hidden agenda or fucked up past?

Nick placed his hands against the wall on either side of my head. "Carrie," he breathed, nearly hypnotizing me with an intense, sexy stare. He grasped my hands, lacing our fingers and pinning my arms above my head.

I became lost in his gorgeous brown eyes. "Yes."

I was so lost in him that I couldn't even think about moving. I didn't want to. I was captivated by the soft, loving expression on his handsome face.

"You do mean something to me," he said, leaning in closer. "You mean a lot to me."

I practically melted against him when he finally pressed his lips against mine in a slow, deep kiss that let me feel more passion in a few seconds than I had in my entire lifetime up until that point. This was the most meaningful kiss Nick and I had shared since meeting and I didn't want it to end.