CHAPTER 2.
"My Tears Ricochet"

She was holding her glass of Guinness with one hand, and with the other, she held a cigarette. The condensation on the glass made her fingers prickly and cold. The cigarette she was holding was being shared with Elijah since she didn't really smoke-only when she was out with friends.

They were all sitting on barstools at a small pub, and there was live music that inevitably made the lads want to get up there and sing. She really wanted to hear them ever since she found out they were a band, especially because she felt guilty about the fact that she didn't even know Elijah was in a band.

"Ok, after their set, I'm going to ask the owner to let us sing." Elijah said to the group, and Marlene laughed at the fact that the boys were all a bit tipsy now and it was only 5 p.m.

"You are drunk; you will slur your words, and then I won't get to hear the full potential of the beautiful songs you have written about me that Bobby keeps telling me about." Marlene said it with a laugh, and Elijah blushed.

He had indeed written several songs about Marlene when he was younger. The lads kept teasing him about him having a crush on her when he was younger in front of her, but she obviously kept thinking they were just joking.

"Yeah, I'm telling you, lass, he wrote like." He started counting with his fingers, getting up to 5, before Elijah interrupted.

"Okay, that's enough; you're going to scare Marlie away."

"Oh no, Bobby is right. There is: When I Have Her On My Mind, Cheer Up Baby, Perfect St-" He would have gone on listing every single song Elijah had written about the girl sitting in front of him if it weren't for Josh smacking him on the back of his head.

Marlene just laughed and shook her head, saying, "Okay, sing one of those."

"Which one do you want to hear?" Elijah asked now with a more serious look.

"Umm, How about Cheer Up Baby?" She replied, and he nodded, then walked down to the end of the bar to ask the older lady at the other side, which was what Marlene assumed was permission to sing. He nodded at the guys and pointed to the stage, which made them all get up and walk over to the stage.

She was kind of nervous; sure, she knew the lads were joking-Elijah couldn't have possibly written songs about her.

Could he?

As they set themselves up with their corresponding instruments, Marlene grabbed the pack of cigarettes on the table, grabbing one for herself and lighting it.

"Hello all, I'm Elijah." There were various greetings throughout the bar, and Marlene giggled.

"We are Inhaler, and we are going to sing for you a song called Cheer Up Baby." He spoke into the mic while adjusting the strap on his guitar.

"This one is for that beautiful lass over by the bar." Marlene blushed as most of the people at the pub looked back at her and decided to take a swig of her beer.

She was about to die or combust at any given moment.

Soon enough, the band started playing, and Marlene inhaled sharply at the first verse of the song.

"When I think of all the things I didn't do, I can't help but blame it on you." Elijah sang while strictly looking at her with a look in his eyes that made her get chills down her spine.

If he was going to keep looking at her like that, she needed more alcohol. She hoped he was prepared to drag her out of here.

She watched him as he sang, and she couldn't look away, not now or ever. You could see it in his face-he was in love. With the music, of course.

But watching Elijah Hewson sing should have been a privilege-a privilege Marlene Walsh wished she was the only one worthy enough to have. The way his fingers moved against the electric guitar strings, the way his lips touched the mic every time he went to sing a verse, and how he carried himself with the utmost confidence, You could tell he loved doing this and that he meant every word he was singing. And he was singing to her, and she couldn't breathe. She didn't realize she was holding her breath the entire time he was up there because if she let herself breathe, she might just die.

His eyes never left her; he watched as the hand holding the cigarette slightly shook and how her face was flushed from the alcohol. She was beautiful, and Elijah has always known this. When he accidentally crashed into her at the park, his younger self knew. When she laughed so hard she would throw her head back, he knew. When she came down the stairs with her pretty yellow dress, which her mom had tailored for her to wear to the dance, he knew. He always knew, and it was killing him to keep it a secret. He wanted to tell her so badly that she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen and that the stars would fucking shine for her. Just for her.

So he wrote so many songs. Telling her or wishing he could tell her. He never thought he would ever get the chance to. He had accepted the fact that he would never get to see her again and that he couldn't tell her that he liked her so much that it hurt him.

like, not love.

He couldn't let himself fall for her; she left once, and knowing Marlene? She would probably leave again. He could see it in her eyes right now as he sang to her. Marlene had to go; she couldn't stay. There wasn't a universe where Marlene Walsh and Elijah Hewson stayed together.

He knew that when he stopped singing, she would tell him she had to leave, so he sang with no care in the world because he would let her go. Elijah would never do anything to force her to stay; he knew how much it hurt to stay.

They sang a few more songs just to prolong the time, but it was getting late, so they said goodbye and got off the stage. The lads wanted another round, so they ordered it.

"Eli, that was fucking amazing." Marlene said that when he reached her, she had a nervous smile.

"I've sang for you before."

"I know, but... I never knew it was like this. You love it, I can tell; anyone could." She said that, and she wanted to reach for him to just hug him and caress his cheek just to show him that she got it.

"Thank you, Marlie." He said it with a curt nod, which left Marlene a bit puzzled.

"I was thinking of grabbing some air," She said as she hopped off the stool and grabbed her bag.

There it is.

He expected her to smile and say goodbye, but this time she quite literally just walked away.

Not even goodbye?

"Are you coming, Hewson?" She asked over her shoulder while grabbing the door open for both of them.

"Yeah," he said breathlessly.

-

They had walked a few blocks now, all in comfortable silence. Marlene shivered as a chill breeze swept through them.

"Are you cold?"

"A bit; I forgot my jacket inside."

"Here." Elijah said as he took off his black leather jacket, leaving him with his Talking Heads t-shirt, which has the sleeves cut off, showing off brand new muscles that were not there before.

Oh, fuck off.

"You don't have to." He shushed her and held out the jacket for her to put her arms through. When she hesitated, he signaled for her to put on the damn jacket.

"You're so annoying; now you'll be cold."

"I don't care."

He really couldn't care less about the cold when he was next to her; everything about her was warm.

"We're both wearing a Talking Heads t-shirt." She noticed, and he stopped walking to look between the two of them and chuckle.

"You're a fake fan, Walsh. I showed you Talking Heads ages ago, and you told me you hated them." He said it with a laugh, and she rolled her eyes.

They went back to silence, but this time it was a charged silence-they both had so many things to say but didn't know if they should.

"Marlie?" Elijah started as he stopped walking and turned to face her. He had an anxious look on his face, and Marlene felt nervous.

"Why didn't you call? I mean, I called you so many times, and not once did you answer. You didn't even text, just straight-up radio silence from you." He said it, exasperated and angry. Elijah never got angry at Marlene.

"Elijah, I don't want to talk."

"No, you don't get to do that. I never thought I would see you again. I called you, I called Kate, I called your mom, I tried so fucking hard, and you just..." Elijah stopped while running a hand through his hair in frustration and letting out a sigh.

Marlene really didn't want to talk about this; if she did, it would open a wound that hasn't healed, a wound that she's trying very hard to ignore.

She knew he called; there were so many nights that Marlene thought about answering but never did.

"I know-I know, I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry? Come on, Marlene! You were my best friend, and you left! Without even a look back!" Elijah didn't mean to yell; he hadn't even realized that he had raised his voice at her until he saw her tear up.

"Marlie, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell. I'm sorry." He comforted her while pulling her into his chest as she cried.

Marlene hated yelling. Her parents used to fight all the time, and every time Marlene would go to the Hewson house to hide from the yelling.

"Eli, I'm so sorry. I couldn't." She tried to talk through her sobs but ended up crying harder, which made Elijah stroke her hair to try and calm her.

Soon, she separated from him, wiped her tears, and then took a calming breath.

"Mum and I didn't move to Boston because of a job. We moved because...

"It's okay; just breathe, Marlie."

"Mum got cancer, Eli. She died a year ago. I couldn't call because I needed to be strong for her. She needed me, and I knew if I told you, it would kill me. You and her were so similar; she loved you like a son, and I know you loved her too. I couldn't do that to you, and if I talked to you, I knew I couldn't keep it to myself." She took a shaky breath before continuing. "I was also being selfish. Eli, you were a reminder of everything good and happy about my life. When Mum was healthy, I wanted to keep pain out of our memories because I loved you, as you know I do. I just couldn't do it, and I'm sorry. I should have told you; it's awful of me to have kept that."

"Marlie, I-"

Elijah was shocked; he had no idea Marlene's mom was not only sick but now dead. Caitlin Walsh had treated him like a son since the first day she met him; she would bake cookies for Marlene and him; she would take them to the mall; she was the woman who told him that if he didn't marry her daughter, she would take it upon herself to make sure they got married. He couldn't think; he had no idea what to feel. He was so mad, but he didn't want to be with Marlie-she was the one who lost her mom. He felt betrayed, though; betrayed that she didn't tell him such a big person in his life had passed; betrayed that she didn't let him take the burden off Marlene's shoulders even a little bit; betrayed that he never got to say goodbye.

"Marlene, I am so sorry. I don't know what to say. I wish you would have let me go through this with you and let me be there for you. Caitlin was one of the women I respected most, and I'm sorry you lost her. I'm sorry you had to go through this alone." He said this as he watched her sob and then immediately dragged her back to his chest.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Please forgive me, Eli." She begged against his chest, and he sighed. He was hurt, really hurt, but there wasn't a world where Elijah Hewson wouldn't forgive Marlene Walsh.

"It's okay, Marlie. You're okay. I forgive you." He told her and comforted her, and after that, they went back to the bar, where they said goodbye to the lads, and he took her home.

Before she walked through the threshold of her home, he whispered something to her-something he had forgotten to say on that side walk, something he hadn't had the privilege to say in years.

"I love you too, Marlie."

-

AUTHOR'S NOTE...
ok guys, i'm sorry. i didn't mean for that to get so depressing in here... it's only the second chapter, i mean how disrespectful of me!! lmao🤓

please don't be mad at my baby marlie for not telling elijah about her mom, she was going through SO much, ITS NOT HER FAULT 😭😭

btw those i love you's were very much platonic, ur delulu to think otherwise... 🤨

ok for the comedic relief of this chapter: