She could hear the cipher shinobi whispering. No doubt they assumed that her closed eyes meant that she'd fallen asleep. They felt sorry for her-- that was the main consensus. Apparently, she was to be treated like a widow or the like. It wasn't like he was dead-- far from it. Every time he moved about, she could hear it through the cool metal door she'd laid her shoulder against. It helped that she'd shifted her head to the side, ear pressed up against the surface.

The few who didn't feel sorry for her seemed to view her as obsessed. Honestly, she didn't blame them. At this point she barely recognized herself. How long had it been since she'd slept? Time kept slipping past her, the girl in such a constant state of sleep deprivation that she had trouble deciphering dream from reality. For all she knew, the cipher shinobi that had a favorable view of her were all in her mind. Perhaps she was going crazy, that happened to people who didn't sleep, right?

"You're there, aren't you?"

The quiet words almost caused her to jump out of her skin. As it was, the brunette's eyes snapped open, focusing on the shadowed wall across the hall from where she sat, curled up against the door.

"... yeah."

Silence followed her admission. She almost thought he must have left without her noticing, returned to the other side of the room where he spent the majority of his time. After a few minutes, however, she heard what sounded like a rather dramatic sigh.

"You're stupid."

Those words prompted a laugh from her.

"Perhaps."

"No," he muttered after a moment. If she'd been able to see him, she would have known the noise was Kurai settling his own back against the door. "Not stupid. Masochistic. He's not here."

"I know. I'm not expecting him to suddenly return... Kurai."

Silence descended once again. In those moments, she could practically hear how just this little conversation had sent her heart into overdrive. It was pathetic. Just because she'd seen him for a few seconds... she was stronger than this. The old her would have been able to pick herself up and go out into the world. She would have tracked Kazue down, demanded answers about whatever had sent the girl out of the village. She knew it had something to do with him. After all, why else would Kazue leave at a time like this?

"Then why are you here?"

All thoughts of leaving escaped her the second he spoke. He sounded so confused, as if the answer to this question was something he just couldn't grasp. He probably couldn't. Tenten hated to admit it, but she'd seen glimpses of this... child-like personality far too many times before his mind had finally collapsed. She knew more of him than Kurai could have possibly guessed.

"It'd be wrong to leave a child alone in this place."

Silence again. It seemed that every word she spoke took time on his end to comprehend. It was a slight victory in Tenten's opinion. To anyone else, Kurai had a witty retort within seconds of whatever they had to say to him. For her, he had to think. What was it that he'd once told her? She... was annoying? Was that what it meant to be annoying?

"You... a child?"

"Yeah."

Another period of silence ensued.

"I'm not a child," he announced. "I'm fifteen.. Sixteen, maybe. I'm not really sure what day it is anymore. My birthday might have passed by now. That's practically an adult, you know."

A smile threatened her lips. Now that sort of protest sounded like the boy she knew.

"Perhaps," she replied. "But... I've been reading--"

"You know how to read? Amazing."

"--and I realized something... every Kurama in history that has been coherent enough to record how they saw their other half has labeled them to be their personal view of a monster. Sometimes that meant a hellish creature. Sometimes that meant something that they had trouble giving a physical description for. For Jun... well, I know him."

Kurai snorted.

"What makes you think you--"

"He hates himself."

Kurai went silent once again.

"So, who else would he view as monstrous? His father, perhaps, for murdering his mother in cold blood. But, you don't act like a cold blooded killer. You're more like... the Jun when he was first becoming him. Cold-hearted, rude, but him. You're a child, aren't you?"

"... ... every monster is birthed of some fear," Kurai answered eventually.

Tenten's lips formed a bitter smile. She supposed she needed to consider that tidbit to be progress when it came to Kurai. Her hands curled into fists in her lap, even as she reveled in the information she'd finally contained. It didn't feel like a victory, the knowledge that the thing your friend hated the most in the world was himself.

"Can you care for others, Kurai?"

The question slipped from her lips, surprising even herself. He laughed, head falling against the cool metal.

"You really are a masochist."

"... probably."

"... I dunno, he murmured.

Kurai was going to answer her? Tenten went tense, ears straining to pick up on every single detail they could as the words slipped from the boy's lips. His voice had suddenly gone quiet, as if even he was uncertain why he'd bothered to answer the question.

"I've only ever known him. Sure, I see other people... but they don't know me, do they? Can you truly care for someone if you've never actually spoken to them? You might hold opinions... but actual emotions... what does it matter, anyways? Do monsters have emotions?"

It was Tenten who didn't reply instantly this time.

"I don't think... a monster would care whether they did or not."

"Stupid."

"Yeah."

"You're an idiot," he grumbled.

"Yeah."

"A masochistic idiot."

"Yeah."

"I hate you."

"... do you?" she asked.

If Tenten had been able to see the boy, she would have known that he'd long since buried his head in his arms, arms which were tucked around the knees he'd pulled up to his chest. She'd know that he had no clue what expression he was supposed to wear at a time like this. She'd know that his body was trembling. She'd know that he'd spent the majority of the day staring at the small cot in his room, as if it was the bed he'd last seen Jun sitting on upon confronting him in that forest.

She'd know how desperate his expression had been as he searched for the boy in his head.

But, she couldn't see him.

  "Yeah. I hate you."  

All she could hear was the lie in his voice.

"Okay."

"Go away, idiot."

"Uh-huh."

"Stupid."

Silence fell again.

"Do you remember when we met?" Tenten suddenly asked.

Kurai snorted.

"Of course I do."

"Not you and me, sorry," Tenten replied. "I mean... me and Jun. You probably don't remember that, do you?"

Kurai fell silent.

"He was broken, then. Not that I realized it at first. He was completely fragile. I'm rather certain that if he'd taken one more blow to himself at that time, he would have shattered. You would have been in control a long time ago."

She paused, but Kurai didn't say anything. Tenten smiled, taking his silence as a unspoken prompt to continue.

"It's how I know you're like he was back then. That Jun... he hated everything."

_______________________

Tenten yawned, her hand barely muffling the sound as her head laid atop of her other palm. Her eyes were settled on the front of the classroom as she absently waited for their sensei to arrive. Beside her, Kazue was going on about something "annoying" Noriaki had done that morning. She'd usually listen and offer some sympathetic comment, but at that moment she couldn't bring up the will in herself to pay attention. She was running on only two hours of sleep, so it was amazing to her that her eyes were even still open.

Still, it'd been worth it. Her father had been willing to finally show her how to forge kunai. She'd spent all of the evening before, working with him in the shop. He'd said that since she was seven, now, she'd be able to handle more advanced techniques. He even promised to show her how to seal weapons into scrolls soon. Her tired face almost lit up in a smile at the thought.

Lost in her thoughts, she barely noticed when their teacher finally appeared, a stranger at his side. It was only when she realized he'd started speaking that she forced her wandering mind to pay attention.

"--his high score in the last exams. That's why, after today, Jun-kun is going to be part of our class. I hope you'll all get along with him. Jun, would you like to say anything?"

Tenten's eyes curiously flicked to the boy at her sensei's side. He was even smaller than her, which she guessed made sense given that Sensei had said he was from a lower grade. His black hair was barely combed, giving off a sorta wild feel that drew her to pay better attention. His blue eyes were what did it, though.

They were cold as ice.

Jun shook his head, indicating he wanted to say nothing else. Much to her surprise, their sensei waved him up to sit on the other side of the aile from her. She straightened up, quickly organizing her things for a reason that was even lost on her. By the time he'd reached his seat, she'd done her best to remove any hint of boredom from her expression.

"Hello," she greeted, sticking out her hand. "I'm..."

She trailed off as Jun sat down, not even sparing her a glance. An indignant huff came from where Kazue sat beside her. Kazue didn't say anything, however, which didn't come as much of a surprise to Tenten. Her friend wasn't exactly the best with strangers, no matter how vocal she was with her friends. Still, it was enough for Tenten that Kazue felt irritated on her behalf.

It wasn't until they were a bit further into class and their teacher pulled out a quiz that Tenten tried interacting with him again. This time it was because she'd realized that in her tired state, she'd forgotten to pick up her pencil bag when leaving home, and Kazue hadn't brought an extra.

"Do you have a pencil I can borrow?" she asked.

Jun spared her a glance this time, an irritated expression flickering across his face.

"Only idiots forget pencils."

"Ignore him," Kazue muttered. "I'll ask Nori-kun."

Tenten hesitated, sparing Jun a glance, before nodding her agreement. That settled, the boy turned his attention completely back to his work.

It would seem her new neighbor wasn't exactly feeling like making friends.

____________________

"He didn't say a kind word to until a month after you'd come," Tenten remembered. "Even then, it was barely anything. He didn't smile for even a longer time than that. He only started joking around two years before graduation.

"It's funny how much you're like Jun, Kurai."

He snorted.

"He was right. You're an idiot."

"Maybe."

A/N: So a lot of Jun's chapters will be like this-- slow, quiet, and full of memories. You'll get more insight into Kurai, as well as Jun and Tenten's past, but not much action, just an fyi. Anyways, have a Kurai! The hair is more brown than his, but eh. Anyways, he's got more emotions than he shows~