2004

—

"I still can't believe I let you convince me to come here, Daph," Astoria says loudly as she follows her sister down the long pathway.

"It's my birthday; of course you were easy to persuade for once," the older girl replies as she swings her arm to wrap around her sister's shoulders. "Besides, I don't see why you were so adamant about not coming."

Astoria sighs, "I just don't feel particularly welcome at events like this. Everyone's always staring."

"Well that's because you're so beautiful, Tori," Daphne brushes the pieces of hair that have fallen over Astoria's eyes back behind her ear.

Astoria laughs and says, "you know that's not true. You have always been the pretty sister."

"Then Mother and Father are lucky they have two pretty daughters," Daphne says as she tries to pick up their pace.

Astoria responds quietly, "I don't think they feel the same."

She leans down to pet the large white cat that lounges on the cobblestone, making sure to allow it to smell her fingertips first. It lets out a small whine before putting its head into the palm of her hand. Letting out a big sigh, Astoria stands back up and allows her sister to take her hand as they walk up to the front door.

"It'll be fine," Daphne reassured. "They won't say or do anything since you're here with me. Plus, Mr. and Mrs. Malfoy will probably stay upstairs the entire time."

One of the Malfoys' only two house elves opens the door as she sees the sisters approaching. She takes off Daphne's corduroy jacket for her, but Astoria hands her own trench coat over to the elf, smiling as she hangs them up for the sisters. Astoria mouths a thank you to her as they walk through the grand foyer and into the dining room.

Daphne has been to Malfoy Manor much more than Astoria has, so the younger sister still turns her head up to look at the large chandelier that hangs above. She trails closely behind her sister, who walks as confidently as ever.

Astoria always admired the way her sister took up space, whether she knew it would be granted to her or not. If Daphne didn't fit in, she would make herself belong, and she was always accepted. Astoria, on the other hand, backed down even before she had the chance to get hurt. She knew the places she was welcomed in, and she didn't question the ones where she wasn't. One of those places was Malfoy Manor, much like her own parents' estate. As much as it was the people who didn't agree with her, it was also the sole atmosphere of their houses, which could never feel like homes to her. The cold walls sought to freeze out her beating heart that was filled with kindness and empathy. Even the long pathways that led up to the properties were intentional, seeking to find isolation from the company of others. Everything about this place was what Astoria sought to run from. The small whispers of delicate memories she kept hidden inside were barely enough to give her hope.

A tall woman who seems to be coming from the washroom steps into the hallway. "Daphne, we're so glad you could make it! What a bore this lunch would be without a birthday girl!" Pansy Parkinson beams as she greets the elder sister with a tight hug.

Daphne smiles back as she says, "You know I would never miss out on an opportunity to see you, Pans." She steps aside and places a hand lightly on Astoria's elbow. "You remember my sister Astoria, don't you?"

"Of course! It's lovely to see you again, Astoria," Pansy smiles curtly before shaking Astoria's hand.

"The pleasure is all mine," Astoria says, nodding at her before the two girls walk in through the doorway with the raven-haired woman.

The long table is lined with an emerald green cloth, and an array of appetizers line across. The other house elf brings out a pitcher, pouring glasses for the final two guests. It seems everyone has been expecting Daphne, because the moment the three step into the light, all heads turn and grin.

A short woman covered in freckles rushes to Daphne's side and throws her arms around her. Astoria recognizes Daphne's best friend, or perhaps more of a sidekick, from their school days, Inez Pertinger. Inez always had a particular disdain for Astoria, but at 24 years old, Astoria could not be bothered. Inez practically ignores her friend's younger sister's presence as she walks her closer to the table.

Astoria keeps her distance and walks in last, unsure of if she'd rather be invisible or if she already is. Someone else stands up and pushes their chair back, but Astoria doesn't bother looking, certain nobody is coming to greet her.

She's sorely mistaken when none other than Draco Malfoy stands before her.

Astoria remembers Draco reaching heights above all their peers by the time his schooling ended, but she can tell that didn't mark the end of his physical growth. Surely he's now taller than her own father. She doesn't speak, expecting he will be the third to embrace her older sister.

To her surprise again, he looks directly at her before saying, "Hello, Astoria." She sees something between a smile and a smirk creep up, and his hands rest clasped behind his back.

It's hard for her to find the words, but she finally responds, "Hello, Draco." Astoria is suddenly very conscious of the way she stands and how her arms hang. She tries to readjust her weight, but it all seems too noticeable.

Behind them, Tracey Davis is now fussing over Daphne. Astoria always liked Tracey; she was level-headed and patient, while the other students were arrogant and hot-tempered.

"It's nice to see you again," Draco continues, trying harder to meet Astoria's eyes as they frantically dart around.

"I'm surprised I'm here," Astoria blurts out, not realizing it until too late. "Are you surprised to see me?" Her toes instinctively curl into the sole of her shoe as she feels heat rush to her cheeks.

"A little, but I know your sister is rather convincing," Draco chuckles warmly, uncharacteristic of everything else about this situation. He follows behind her to her seat, but she pulls it out of its place before he gets the chance to.

Draco quickly walks back to his own place at the head of the long table, opposite of Inez. Before seating himself, he says, "since everyone is here, shall we start the meal?"

Nods and murmurs of approval sound around the table as they begin digging in, the house elves standing by the door to the kitchen as they watch and make sure everyone is attended to.

—

A breeze brushes against Astoria's arms, reminding her that summer and autumn now blend together in the sky's canvas. Instinctively, she finds herself rapidly tapping her foot against the marble floor of the Malfoys' balcony as the afternoon passes by. For someone who went to such great efforts to make sure Astoria was present at lunch, Daphne sure has not paid very much attention to her.

This morning, Astoria had held out hope that perhaps things had changed, that people were different. While that may have been true for some, as Pansy certainly mellowed out and Draco is much less of a nuisance, the general aura of pompousness still hangs around the room. It didn't take much time throughout the lunch before she was reminded of every reason she has avoided seeing the people she was forced to grow up with. Astoria supposes maybe her patience has grown thin with age, but then again a little humility never hurt anybody. However, she'll always have a soft spot for her own sister, who may simply struggle with seeing others' perspectives. No matter how many times she chastises her, Astoria knows it's out of love, and that Daphne wants the best for her. But sometimes people have different visions of peace and happiness.

It still surprises Astoria that the Malfoys decided to settle in the countryside. The family always seemed more posh than her own, yet there was a stark dichotomy between the Malfoy's residence in Wiltshire and the Greengrass' estate in Chelsea. Neither suited Astoria's taste, but she had to admit the countryside was much more peaceful, allowing her to rest. She could imagine staying in a little cottage, or perhaps a ranch, during the last few years of her life — somewhere with fresh air and a view.

There wasn't much of a view from the Malfoys' balcony, as the tall trees covered past the perimeters of the property, but the garden Narcissa kept was worthy of admiration. The white peacocks strutted along, and while Astoria would normally roll her eyes at their ostentatious display, she finds their odd little dances to be endearing today.

As the years go by, her body starts tolerating less of the open air, however refreshing it was for her head. She wishes she could go grab her jacket, but she doesn't want to bother the two house elves, who are undoubtedly running back and forth from the dining room to the kitchen to refill drinks and serve the next small platters.

"I brought you some cheesecake," Draco says as he closes the door to the balcony behind him, walking towards Astoria. "Too many people inside?"

Astoria smiles back at him and takes the small platter from his hands. "Not too many people; just the wrong ones. This isn't my typical crowd."

"Is my company too much then?" Draco turns to look at her, searching in her eyes as he rolls up the sleeves of his dark blue button-up, now that both his hands are free.

She glances over briefly before taking a bite of her dessert. Shaking her head, Astoria says, "not at all. I'm happy to see you've certainly grown out of your schoolyard bully ways."

Draco laughs softly and stares down at his feet. "You and I both know there's much worse things I've grown out of."

He stands next to her, silence hanging between them save for the whistling of wind brushing against the willow trees. The sun lightly peeks out from behind the fluffy clouds, shining on a small patch of the marble floor, but not enough to provide any extra warmth.

He notices her shivering and asks, "would you like your jacket?"

Despite the goosebumps that have crept up on her skin, she says, "no, I wouldn't want to trouble anybody. Thank you, though."

"Nonsense," he replies as he waves over one of the elves, who promptly returns indoors to the coat closet. He shifts on his feet, allowing his weight to rest firmly planted as he leans forwards on the balcony ledge. He recalls many days and nights like this, although with no company as he escaped the fuss of his mother's luncheons and his father's dinner parties.

"So is this what you're doing these days?" Astoria elaborates, "throwing little tea parties for all your little friends?"

"I can be generous when I want to be," Draco chuckles, running a hand through his blond hair, which has grown out a little more than his liking.

"Are you being generous right now? Talking to me?" She takes the napkin and wipes the corners of her lips and then sets the finished plate down on the floor beside her feet.

He laughs gently beside her. "Actually, I genuinely wanted to see you and talk to you today. Why, is that surprising to you?"

"People don't ask to be around me very often, Draco." She twiddles with her thumbs back and forth on the ledge of the balcony.

"Are you—"

"I'm not pushing them away," she answers quickly.

Draco bites back a snicker before saying, "I was going to ask if you were lonely."

"I apologize," she closes her eyes and laughs at herself. "I can be, at times. I've grown used to being on my own, you know? But sometimes I know it would be nice to have some company, or someone to confide in. Daphne and I are close, but I don't want to burden her with everything."

He nods at her, taking in the words she seems to have spilled with little to no effort. The house elf comes back with Astoria's trench coat, and Draco helps her slide it on over her arms.

She grimaces, "I'm sorry; I didn't mean to dump all of that on you."

"I'm the one who asked," he says, slowly walking over to the far right end of the balcony, where he picks an apple off of each of the two trees, one red and one green. "I think I can handle it." He hands the red apple to Astoria, taking a bite out of the green apple himself.

"Thank you," she replies. "For listening, and for the fruit. I see your tastes haven't changed," she gestures at the produce in his hands.

"Some habits stay with us from childhood," he says.

"Very wise, Draco," she says, smiling up at him. "You should write a book with all your wisdom."

"I'm sure that would sell well. Can you imagine? 'Musings from a Former Death Eater.'" It seems this was his turn to let go of his filter. "My apologies, that was in poor taste."

Astoria smiles reassuringly at him. "I know the sort — have to poke fun at my own malediction in order to come to terms with it."

He looks down at his feet before quietly replying, "I've been meaning to ask. I didn't want to pry of course, but I think people are starting to worry more."

She matches his volume and says, "who have you talked to about my illness?"

He glances back up to her, honestly falling forward over his eyes. "Your sister has mentioned it a bit, and she did say your parents are concerned."

"They've never expressed concern over me since the day I first went to St. Mungo's," Astoria sighs, watching the peacocks down below the balcony.

"If there's anything I know about pureblood parents, it's that they're willing to do anything to protect their children," Draco says, his own eyes following where Astoria's gaze lands.

"Oh, I know they would sacrifice everything they had for Daphne," Astoria says, resting her chin on top of her clasped fists. "Besides, is a pureblood with a blood curse really a pureblood?"

Draco looks over at her in shock. "Of course you're still a pureblood. Anyways, I thought you stopped caring about blood status decades ago."

"I did, but that doesn't mean I've forgotten how my parents tried to raise me," she whispers back to him, unsure if it's because she thinks he doesn't actually care to know or because deep down she's embarrassed to admit it.

The two watch as the peacocks wander from bush to bush, nibbling loudly at the budding flowers. Draco is certain his mother would shriek if she were here to see her garden being bitten away by the large, flamboyant creatures. At times, the two share a plant, but at others, they caw at one another as they fight.

"Wouldn't it be nice to be like them?" Draco says. "Only having to worry about food and water and sleep, nothing past survival?"

Astoria turns to him, her face covered in surprise. "Most of the beauty of life lies beyond that. We have to live through the pain in order to see the joyous parts. If we only take the easy route we'll never get to truly live, however short the amount of time we get is."

He nods, the wheels turning inside his head. "Now look at you, being the intelligent one."

"Staring death in the face will do that to you, won't it?" She playfully nudges her upper arm against his. "Don't worry, I've still got many years left in me."

He smiles weakly over at her. "Thank you," he says, "for coming today, and for keeping me company out here. I don't think you're the only one who's grown a little tired of their antics. Unfortunately, I do believe we are wanted inside to watch Daphne open gifts."

Draco offers his arm out to her, and Astoria clasps her hand on his bicep, carrying her empty plate in her other hand. As they walk back in, their ears are filled with a symphony of cackles as Daphne reads an allegedly vulgar card from Pansy. Astoria finds her own purse hanging behind her seat, digging out a simply wrapped box before handing it to her sister.

The room goes quiet as they watch her carefully undo the ribbon and taping. She finally pulls out a deck of cards.

"I made them myself," Astoria says. "I cast a self-shuffling spell on them, like how we used to joke about when we were kids, and thought we'd never figure out how to do it. Willow painted the symbols and runes for me." She points at the brushwork in the corners of the cards.

"This is so sweet, Astoria," Daphne says, pulling her sister into a hug. "There's even a little gray kitten like the one that used to come by the manor when we were kids." She flips through the stack rapidly with her thumb.

"Is Willow that half-blood girl?" Inez interrupts, taking a few cars into her hands. "She had a genius twin sister in Slytherin, but it's a shame that magical blood went to waste."

Astoria clenches her jaw tightly and feels Draco stare at her, but she sits quietly, knowing Daphne would hate a ruckus. Instead, she finishes her glass of water, leaning back as she stares out the big glass windows at the balcony where she was standing earlier. The clouds move apart, exposing the clear sky that matched the misty color of Draco's eyes.

Her eyes follow the blending colors overhead. She focuses on the pale peach tone that matches the small flat shoes Daphne wears. She focuses on the buttery yellow shade identical to the crust of the cheesecake sitting in the center of the table. She focuses on the light seafoam hue that is also found in the detailing of the plate in front of her.

As the afternoon drifts on, her eyes continue fixating on the mixing and changing of pigments, a natural phenomena that cannot be stopped.

—

well this was super dialogue heavy and i feel a lot more comfortable with description so i apologize if this was not up to par! i would love to hear your thoughts either way.

here is your place to freak out about any parallels you found between the past and present timelines and to discover the ones you may have missed ➡️

qotd: what is your favorite dessert?

aotd: i don't have much of a sweet tooth so pretty much the only desserts i like are tiramisu, lemon bars, brownies/blondies, and cheesecake.

don't forget to vote!

à plus tard mes copains!