5. First time in Jeju

It has been seven weeks since we started dating and my condition has improved by a lot. The reason for that is because Joon has been taking care of me very well. He came to the hospital everyday for a week until I was discharged and brought me bouquets of flowers, chocolates and wrote poetries for me. I still keep them in my purse with me. They are so meaningful to me. Joon has been showing me all around Seoul until we have visited every corner. We have been going to the cinema, noraebangs, shopping and eating delicious food. He gives me so much strength and spirit, I have never felt this much love in my life. He means the world to me, I am so in love with him.
Two days ago, Namjoon told me he bought tickets for our first trip to Jeju-do, 2 days and 1 night. I was worried at first because we will be spending the night together but I didn't let him notice.

Namjoon calls me, saying he is waiting at my hotel. I start packing the last things in my travel bag but I am still contemplating which outfits to pick. I just throw in anything to wear and leave the suite in my blue shorts and soft pink blouse. I wear some brown sunglasses and I am ready to go. I go downstairs and he is standing there with his suitcase, wearing white short pants and a blue and white striped shirt. He takes my bag from my hand and asks me:"Ema, are you ready. Have you forgotten anything? Do you have your meds with you?" I look at him with a smile and nod.
On the plane, we are sitting next to each other in business class. The flight is only 1 hour long. The plane will be flying in a few minutes and Namjoon's thighs start trembling. "Joon-ah, are you scared of flying?", I ask quietly, so no one can overhear. "As if", I chuckle,"You fly all the time during world tours", I say but he isn't answering me. Joon is noticeably conscious of his surroundings as if he is watching for people looking at him. When I take a look around the small plane, I overhear a group of teenage girls giggling and staring at me from afar. They look at me with a very strange look. I think they are aware of Namjoon. What to do now? I get nervous as well and my palms are sweating. I rub them against each other and Joon takes note of that. He takes my hand and leans in to my ear:"Don't mind them. They won't harm you. I am here", and smiles at me with his cute dimples showing.
The plane heads off and my mind starts shifting elsewhere. Last night, I didn't sleep too well and now begin yawning. "Let's rest", Joon says and puts my head on his broad shoulder. My heart skips a beat and then I fall asleep with a smile on my face.

"You need to exit the plane", the stewardess explains. I feel my arm being shaken and Joon's soft voice says:"Ema, wake up. We arrived." I wake up and put aside the blanket that was on me. "Yeeeaaaah", I yawn, stretching my hands in the air and standing up.

Few hours later

The flower path looks amazing. We are holding hands and taking in the fresh summer breeze. It is stunning. Namjoon asks an ajumma standing by:"Would you mind taking a picture of us?", and hands her his phone."Yes. You look like a beautiful married couple." Namjoon starts blushing and I answer quickly:"No, we are just a couple." She grunts in disbelief and takes multiple pictures. We thank her. She notes rudely in front of me:"If you aren't married yet, young man. I have a great granddaughter?" I take Joon's hand and we leave quickly. Namjoon teases me:"Are you jealous?", and pats my shoulder. With crossed arms I tease him:"No, because I know you are forever mine." Suddenly, he pulls me into a hug, my head on his chest. I can hear his heart beating loudly. "I love you and you are forever mine. No one can ever take you from me", he confesses and I smile in his chest. After a few minutes, my stomach growls, the romantic feeling is gone. Embarrassed, I look away and we go to a seafood restaurant that is located next to the beach.

"Why don't you eat Joon. I can't eat when you are staring at me", I say with an annoyed and cute attitude. "I am full when I see you eat", he says. I hit his arms and say:"Yaaah, stop being so cheesy and start eating." "To be honest, I don't like seafood", he admits looking down. "But I can peel these shrimps for you. Don't think of me. I will buy myself some ramen at the convenience store nearby", he says trying to make me feel better.
The rest of the meal was quite awkward, so we had to drink to make it more comfortable.
One shot, two shots, three shots and it is already dark outside.

The moon and stars are shining on the blue water. It is windy and the waves are strong. Namjoon and I are wandering around hand in hand. My hands are cold. He takes his jacket off and puts it around my shoulders:"You can't catch a cold, baby". I put on the jacket but am still mindful of him.
"I love the beach. It reminds me of my childhood when everything was fine", I open up to him. I trust him now. Namjoon agrees:"Me too. I love the beach especially when I am here with someone special to me." He holds my hand tighter and I fall down to the sand. Joon sits next to me, his arms around me. I tear up. Joon asks me in a concerned tone:"Are you okay? You are crying." "It is just that I am drunk," I answer,"You know, back then, my sister used to be joyful." I cry my heart out and Joon is nodding along, listening to me without asking questions. I have never told him about my past before or anyone. I continue:"Florence used to love the beach too. When I was young, we actually behaved like sisters. We would play around chasing each other. Her smile is still unforgettable. The most beautiful moment in my life. I miss her." I cry into his chest and he pats my back saying it is okay.

When we are back at the hotel, my mind is cleared again. I feel relieved I talked to someone about her and that this someone is my love, Joon.

"I will take a shower, Ema", Namjoon says and goes into the bathroom. After fifteen minutes, he comes out with wet hair and only wears a towel around his waist, revealing his bare chest. I quickly turn away because I am embarrassed and go into the shower. Using all the sweet scents, I finish up and look for my towel. My towel is missing. What do I do? Oh my. I can't just leave without a towel on. I let the water keep on running, so Joon doesn't get suspicious. Now, I need to think of how to get out of this situation. Aaaah, there is no way out, I need to ask Joon for help.
"Joon, I forgot my towel. Can you bring it to me", I shout from inside the bathroom. He grabs the towel and gives it to me without looking, like a gentleman. I come out of the bathroom wearing my pajamas, underneath some Victoria's Secret lingerie and sit on the small bed which barely has space for two. Namjoon is already sleeping on the bed with our couple set pajamas on. I don't know why I expected something to happen tonight. I shouldn't have worried so much but somehow I feel disappointed. I guess today won't be the day I lose it. All of a sudden, Namjoon wakes up and kisses me on the lips. "I know you want it too", he says seductively in his low voice.

We look into each other's eyes and then we kiss passionately. One thing leads to the other and he strips his shirt off. I can feel his abs on me. He takes my hand and puts it onto his body. Continuing kissing, he unbuttones my shirt and reveals my red bra. I stop him because of my scars around my heart. I am scared to show it to him. "We don't have to do it, babe. We can stop. I'm not mad", he says, but I interrupt:"I want it but I am kind of insecure about my scar." Joon kisses my neck going down to my breast:"I love you and your scars." Unbuttoning my bra, we are both now completely naked. Dimming the lights down, he looks at my eyes asking for permission. I nod and let him take over my body, trusting him wholly.

I will never forget this day that changed our lives entirely.