Chapter 22
The earth seemed to shake as if an earthquake was happening, or was it me that was shaking so hard? I was barely registering anything other than his outburst echoing inside my mind. Mine, he said. His. Alexander, was his?
Looking over my son's features, I still couldn't see it. Sure, there were resemblances, but it's not like Caleb was the only man walking the face of the earth, that has brown hair.
In front of me, my wall and support system turned to look at me, questioning me without words. I didn't know what to tell them, didn't know what they expected of me.
Caleb appeared in front of me, a look of pure joy on his face, to which I hesitantly responded with a smile, I allowed him to lift Alexander out of my arms and watched how he wrapped him in his big arms, sniffing him all over. A look of pride took place over his features as he turned around towards Luke and Will, bragging how this was his son. He started murmuring things to Alexander, things I couldn't hear, but soon, Alexander was giggling. The sound and the realization that Caleb had elicited it, made my heart flutter.
I sat down on the porch steps, watching the encounter between them, but not meddling. I didn't mind giving them this time to bond, just the two of them. After all, Alexander going to grow up never knowing his dad was one of my biggest fears for the past six years. It felt as if a weight had been lifted of my shoulders, but I also realized it hadn't taken away the barrier of not feeling the mate bond. In that way, it had only created extra pressure to make this work, considering he was Alex' father, which meant our lives were intertwined forever now, even more than before we knew we had a child together.
A presence joined me on the steps and I looked sideways to see who it was.
"Can you imagine if you'd have just waited on the Alpha all those years ago?" spoke Luke, with a knowing smirk.
"What do you mean?" I asked, confused.
"Dad had called for the Alpha when your shift didn't happen. He was on his way, just minutes out, and you could have met him right there, could have been happy all those years ago."
I opened my mouth, trying to object, but realized how right he was. The thought brought tears to my eyes and I was close to having a breakdown. A weird sort of sob made its way out of my mouth and instantly, I heard a whooshing sound, Caleb appearing in front of me, taking my face between his hands. He stared at my face before looking at Luke, accusing him.
"WHAT DID YOU DO?" his voice boomed, all the while his chest was rumbling with growls.
Luke put his hands up in surrender, scooting away from me so he wouldn't anger his Alpha more. He knew better than to mess with mates.
"He didn't do anything." I interrupted. "He just made me realize we could have been happy already, you wouldn't have missed out on so much of Alex' life and I just -" another sob wracked through my body and I could feel Caleb pulling me up and wrapping me in his arms, gently swaying me from left to right. For the first time since I'd met him, I didn't hesitate to put my arms around him too.
I could feel him tense up, until his chest began rumbling again, but different than his growls. It was softer, more melodious. Aww, he was purring. I didn't say anything, but a smile took over my features and I could feel myself calm down considerably.
We stayed like that for a while, in each others embrace, not speaking, perfectly content in our cocoon, until I felt a soft tug at the hem of my dress. Looking down I saw Alexander watching us.
He motioned for me to come closer and held his hand by his mouth, wanting to whisper something to me. I smiled and crouched down, putting my ear next to his mouth so he could say what he wanted to.
"Is this my Daddy? Can we be a family now?"
Of course, Alexander's whispers were nowhere near an actual whisper and with their heightened hearing, I was sure all three wolves around me had heard him. Before I was able to answer, Caleb did:
"Yes buddy, I am, and yes we can."
Instantly, I froze. Panicking I looked up towards Caleb and unwrapped myself from his body. Panic flooded my system as I looked at him, like a deer caught in the headlights.
This didn't change anything, I still couldn't feel our bond, so I was still fifty feet behind him in feelings, and looking at his overjoyed face, it could easily be a hundred feet. We harboured no where near of the same amount of feelings and it frightened me immensely.
Caleb peered down at my face, taking note of my panicked expression as he tried to reach out to me. He sobered up considerably, his demeanor changing to a very serious one.
"Cassie." he spoke sternly, rooting me in my place as I tried to take steps backwards, trying to escape, find some place safe where I could hide, hide for as long as it would take for him to forget me. Not that that would be possible, but a girl could dream.
I watched Caleb's eyes glace over as I was still looking for an escape route. Luke came closer and swooped Alexander up in his arms, disappearing into the house before I could object. I tried to turn to ask him what he was doing, but instead, I was hoisted up over Caleb's shoulder as he began running away from the house.
I was too flabbergasted to even speak, but eventually, I recovered and started drumming my fists on his back.
"Put me down, right now, you big yeti."
Caleb's laughter reached my ears, but he listened anyway.
"Yeti?" he said as he put me down gently, keeping his hands on either side of my waist. He was obviously afraid I would make a run for it, but I knew I couldn't outrun him, so why bother trying?
"Yes! You behave like an ill-mannered animal!"
"Well, I hate to break it to you sweetheart, but I am in fact a wolf, so.."
"Argh!" I said, even stomping my foot in annoyance. "You know what I mean!" I exclaimed, cheeks flaring red out of anger at his amusement with me.
Caleb tightened his hold on my waist as I began moving backwards, his eyes darkening.
"Don't run from me." he said, through clenched teeth.
I stilled, looking up at him and nodded. His hold didn't waver. He didn't believe I wouldn't run.
"Now. Tell me why all of this frightens you so much. In all those years, you must have imagined what your mate was like? Or who Alex' father was?"
"It's Alexander!" I exclaimed, not sure why I was getting so worked up over a name, instead of facing the real issue here.
Caleb gave me a look that clearly said: 'really?' before he spoke.
"Tell me."
I sighed. I didn't even know what was holding me back. Of course I had dreamed of meeting him, and dreading it as well. As for thinking about Alex' father, it had been too painful. I had been so guilt consumed that I hadn't waited for my mate, I had loathed myself for it. Suddenly, I realized that I had waited for my mate after all. Gosh, I had messed up so bad all those years ago.
"I will be a disappointment, I won't be able to protect myself, let alone your pack, so how can I ever be a Luna? Because of me, your sons won't be strong, Alexander shows no signs of having a wolf, he developed as slow as a weak human, as weak as I feel, I'm weak!"
By the end of my statement, I was full-on sobbing and I felt Caleb's arms trying to reach around me again, but I pushed him away.
"No! I don't want your pity, you need to realize how this won't work, why don't you reject me already! I feel like I'm slowly dying inside because I'm such a disappointment to you, such a failure."
This time, Caleb's arms came around me, nearly crushing me from the force he was putting into it, so I couldn't push him away. Tears stained his T-shirt as he held me to him.
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New part! Let me know what you're thinking about Cassie! Big
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