Ren

JULY, 2010

Me: I'm still at the office. Going to be home a little late tonight, like 7. I've got a deadline tomorrow morning, and I'm still not done.

Metric: That's ok. I'm actually still wrapping up too 

Metric: Two of my guys didn't show, and we're pouring concrete today

Me: What should we do about dinner?

Metric: Um, how about I pick up some Chinese on the way home?

Me: Perfect. Just order the same as last time. See you in a little bit

Me: Oh, and I got my period today, so you can stop freaking out

Me: I can tell

Metric: Thank fucking god

Metric: Sorry Bella. I shouldn't have said it like that

Me: It's ok. I knew nothing was going to happen anyway 

That doesn't mean I wasn't secretly hoping it somehow would...

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Long shadows break through the dry dust my tires are kicking up on our gravel driveway as I pull in at 7:15 pm. I notice right away Gio's truck still isn't there. I get out of the car and slump against it. Today has been exhausting. Ughh. Cheryl can bite my ass. I work my butt off for her, and she hardly even says a meaningful thank you. 

"Ta!"  I mimic her voice out loud, adding an exaggerated eye roll.

Let it go, Ren. Let the day go. 

What I really need to do is quit and start my own company. Gio's business is going gangbusters. Logically I know if I'm going to bust my butt this hard at work, I might as well be doing it for myself, but I can never quite work up the nerve—so I delay it. Soon, soon.

I inhale deeply and close my eyes, and the smell that fills my nostrils is both earthy and sweet, like dry dirt and hay. So indicative of mid-summer here. I let it out loudly through my lips, taking a bit of stress along with it, and tune my ears into the sound of the crickets beginning to talk about their day as the thick haze of evening sets in.

Suddenly, a tickle of cool ocean air flows over my warm, sun-kissed skin. It's picking up just now—rolling in from the coast. It does this every summer night, blowing away the baking oven heat of the day and replacing it with beautiful salt-tinged, moist air. It's one of the best things about living this close to the coast—nature-provided air conditioning.

The distinctive engine sound of Gio's truck coming down the country road breaks me from my reprieve. His white Silverado pulls up next to me, the door pops open, and he stiffly climbs out, holding the tightly tied white plastic bag of food. His hair is all messed up, and he's all white and dusty. His disheveled appearance tells me he must have had quite a day as well. 

Did he get into a fight with a tornado? Sill looks damn sexy, though.

His body is calling to me, and I come up to hug him, but he stops me short with his hand.

"I'm all sweaty and dirty, and I don't want to spoil your nice work clothes," and gives me a quick kiss on the lips instead. Then he steps back, taking a look at me. "You look hot, by the way. Nice skirt."

Gio has a whole weeknight routine I'm not allowed to mess with. He takes his cocktail of medications and gets in bed at 8:30, journals and reads for a bit, and falls asleep by 9 pm, then wakes at 5 am to jog and lift weights and leaves the house when I'm just getting out of bed in the morning. So much to say that he usually only gets to see my work outfits when I come home.

"Thanks, but I feel like a complete mess at this point, like my day."

"Sorry, Bella. What's the latest cluster-fuck at Viibe?"

"Oh, just the usual. I had a whole list of stuff I needed to do that I didn't even get to because of another surprise deadline!" I groan, taking the bag of food from him and leading him into the house, talking as I go. "Cheryl can not say no to her clients. She keeps adding more and more scope and then freaks out when we are over our hours or scrambling to meet a deadline. Ugh. Anyway, how was your day?" dropping the bag on the kitchen counter.

"A fucking shit show. Look at me!" He motions with both hands to his powdery clothes. 

Turning to the sink, he washes his hands and arms and keeps talking, "We were prepping to pour some small footing, and of course, the concrete bag I grabbed out of the truck had a rip in it. So, as I hoisted it onto my shoulder, it tore apart on me—covered me head to fucking foot!"

I bite back a laugh, imagining the scene. I can just see the priceless look on his face and then the multitude of curse words flowing out of his mouth.

"Yeah, laugh it up, just like David and Jamie. You think I look dusty now? You should have seen me earlier. I looked like a fucking snowman!  Anyway, I had to run back to the building supply store, and the whole job was held up. Then I had to run out to do Paula's yard because I promised it would get done this week. Oh, and I still have to find time to write up the proposal for the new client I talked to on Monday. I better do that tonight. Ugh! I'm already tired just thinking about it," he groans. "Let me take a quick shower before we eat, okay?"

♥︎♥︎♥︎

"Bella?" he asks as he towels off.

"Yeah?"

"When are you going to quit that job? I'm making enough money now to cover us."

"Yeah, but what about health care? I have a really good policy," I say, following him to our bedroom.

"I know the one I have is expensive as fuck, but we'll figure it out. They work you too hard there, and for what? I think it's time," he says, grabbing a new pair of boxer briefs and pulling them on. 

He's right. I know he's right. But the unknown part of running a business—proposals, billing clients, leading meetings—makes me feel like bats are hanging by their toenails in my stomach.

"You can do it, Bella," he says, reading my mind. He steps up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist, and I feel his still warm, clean shower skin press against me.  "Come on, believe in yourself... and me a little more."

"You?" I question, turning within his embrace to face him.

"Yeah," he insists, holding my eyes with his, conveying his seriousness. "Believe that I can take care of you till you get your business up and running."

"I do believe in you," I say, kissing him to confirm it. "I don't know. I feel like I just need a break to think about things and get my head straight."

"You want me to try to get the beach cabin for the weekend?" 

Hawaii

"What?" he asks.

Oops, did I say that out loud?

"Let's go to Hawaii!" I say, spinning to face him, locking his confused eyes with my sparkling ones. I  feel a whip of excitement flick through me.

"Uhh..."

"Babe, I need a real vacation," I tell him, rapping the knuckles of my closed fists together giddily in front of my heart. "It's been years. Have you ever been there?" I ask wide-eyed, suddenly gabbing his forearms.

"I've only ever been on a plane once," he admits.

"What? Really? To where?"

"Vegas—with the guys for Charlie's twenty-first."

I'm so pumped about this idea! This will be just what I need! What he deserves. He's never been on a big vacation? Placing my hands on the skin of his bare chest, "We should definitely go then!" 

"Bella, isn't Hawaii expensive?" he says, scratching his head.

"The plane flights aren't. My mom's best friend's a doctor and has a rental there, and maybe we can get it. She told me to ask if I ever wanted to go."

"I, I don't know."

"What? Why?"

"It sounds amazing, baby. As long as we can afford something like that."

"Let me text her!" And I skip out of the room to find my phone. 

Before Gio has even fully unpacked our dinner, I've already written a nicely worded text to my mom's friend and pressed send. Every nerve ending in my body is lit up with the idea of this adventure with him. We bring our plates over and eat in front of the TV, watching Survivor, like we do every Wednesday night. My phone buzzes on the coffee table, and I instantly grab it. My eyes light up as I read the message.

"Eeee!" I squeal. "She says it's available starting August 16th till the end of the month!"

"But that's in, like, three weeks. I can't go that soon."

I don't respond because I'm on my way to open my laptop on the dining room table to search for flights.

"Only $126 each way! That's $300 return with taxes. Gio, $600 to Hawaii and free accommodation? We have to go!"

He follows me into the dining room. "Ren, I—"

"Gio, you deserve this. You've been working so hard. We can just go for one week!"

"I don't know. I've got so much going on. Everyone counts on me," he says nervously. 

"Jamie can keep the team working while you're away. You always say how great he is and how much you trust him. Your clients will understand if you give them notice. Come on, baby! Ten days, Hawaii, just you and me, for $600!"

"Ten days? You just said a week a minute ago. Anyway, it's not just $600. There's also the cost of food."

"Okay, yeah, but we got to eat regardless. This place has a kitchenette, so we can make food there."

He crosses his arms. "And car rental." 

"Okay, okay, Mr. Practical, it'll be a bit more than $600. But come on... we both need this. I mean, besides Nevada, have you even left California?"

"Does Tijuana count?" He shrugs.

I smile softly at him. "Not really."

"Why? Where have you been besides New York?" he asks me petulantly.

"Well, let's see..." I say, leaning back in my dining room chair. "Hawaii, Montreal, London, Paris, Rome, Prague, Ecuador, and on my honeymoon, Alex and I went to—"

"Okay," he cuts in quickly.

"Okay, what?" I say, flicking my eyes to his and leaning forward, lightly gripping the table's edge. 

He smiles softly, scratching the back of his neck. "I said okay. Yes, let's go. I'll figure it out." 

I knock over the chair on my way to him. "YAAAAY!" 

I fly into his chest, hugging him tightly, and he laughs at my unbridled enthusiasm. "Baby, you're going to love it. We'll go hiking in the jungle and snorkeling in the reefs. You can surf every day while I read my books and tan on the beach."

"Sounds perfect, Bella," he whispers, nuzzling my ear.

♥︎♥︎♥︎

https://youtu.be/W8a4sUabCUo