Falling like the Stars- James Author

Perfect- Madilyn Bailey

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Love.

Have you ever wondered who the first person ever to say "I love you" was? Better yet, who the hell even came up with the word love? Did they get this gut feeling and just say, "You know what, I think I will call this feeling here, love"?

Like, how do we know that what they felt is what we who are in love are also feeling? Love means different things to and for different people. For instance, I love my parents; I rarely tell them that I love them, but I do. But When I tell Jayda I love her; I don't mean with the same type of love I have for them. The way I love them isn't how I love her.

It's two different things, so why isn't there another name for it! Why do we call all forms of love, love? I will always tell Jayda I love her because I do, more than anything, but even saying the mere simple word to her will never be enough.

What I feel for her is more than love. I have no idea what it is, or if there's even a name for how I feel; all I know is that word, that four fucking letter word, isn't enough to describe the eternal soul-sucking captivation I get when I'm around her.

Love is to weak of a word for how I feel.

"I can't do it," she says and backs away from the edge. She shakes her head, backing out for the hundredth time, and turns around to me, trying to walk away; I stand in front of her. "Move, I'm doing it," she folds her arms.

"We came all this way!"

"Okay, you should have mentioned how high up it was!" she squeals, looking back at the twenty-foot drop into the lake.

"I did; I told you several times!" The whole ride out here, I told her how high it was. I had a feeling she wasn't listening; her mind was somewhere else. She's been zoned out for like the past week, ever since I had picked her up from the airport. I asked her if something happened with Blair in New York; she told me no. I asked her if she was missing Jessica she told me no, I don't know what else it could be.

"Okay, well, still, no, I'm not doing it. I wanna live. Yes, me Jayda wants to live for the first time in forever, and jumping off this cliff-"

"Into water," I add and take a step forward; she moves back slightly near the edge.

"Either way, it's putting my newly found will to live at risk," she narrows her eyes, "So I'm not doing it, and you c-"

Before she finishes that sentence, I shove her back off the cliff into the water.

I stand by the edge, watching her fall in; for a second, she goes under, and then another second later, she rises up, screaming my name. "Ryder! I'm going to kill you!" she shouts, and I laugh hard.

"This isn't funny," her hands slam against the water.

I walk close to the edge and take a deep breath before diving in also. Under the water, I can still hear her loud shouts from above. I don't want to come out; she's pissed and honestly mad Jayda scares me. I come up from the water to find her with a hostile scowl on her face, "Why would you just do that?"

"Jump in," I pretend like I don't know what she is talking about, making her even more upset than before.

"No, push me!"

"You were talking too much," She talks herself out of alot of things; I refuse to have let her talk herself out of this. "Are you mad?" I ask, knowing she's still mad.

"Of course I'm fucking mad; you just pushed... no shoved me into a lake!"

"Did you die?" It's not like I pushed her off a building; it was into the water, and she can swim, so I knew she would be fine.

"That's not the point," I smile at her, finding humor in her anger. She's even cuter when she's angry. "Stop smiling; this isn't funny," she splashes water in my face and then swims away from me.

"Jayda," I guess she really is mad. I swim towards her. Her body slowly rises from the water as she gets closer to the lake's bank and steps out. When I get closer to her, I pull her by her waist back into me. She giggles when I tickle the side of her ribs. I turn her around to me, and she continues laughing, her brown eyes light up in the dim evening. "So you aren't mad?"

"No," she shakes her head, biting her bottom lip. "Not anymore," she walks over to our blanket that's spread out on the grass and takes a seat. "I'm going to get you back, though,"

I sit beside her, "Is that so?"

"Mhm," she nods, smiling.

"You seem pretty confident," What could Jayda King possibly do to me? To be honest, I'm eager to see what she will do to get me back.

"I am, so just watch you back,"

"No need to," I huff and then look away; from the corner of my eyes, I can see her narrowing her eyes and smiling at me. My phone rings sitting in the middle of both of us. It's my mother; I send the call straight to voicemail.

"They're probably looking for us; we've been gone all day," she says. "Should we tell them where we are?"

"We snuck away; why would we sneak away just to tell them where we are at?" The whole point of us leaving was to get away from our suffocating parents. Even on vacation at our Hampton properties, they still find a way to be so uptight.

She thinks about it for a second and then says, "You're right,"

I make a smart remark saying, "I know I am," and she swats me over the head. I wince, and she throws her head back, finding amusement in hitting me.

I rub the back of my head. To be a girl, she hits hard as fuck. I stand up and say, "Do you wanna go back in?"

"No," she shakes her head. "I'm scared you're going to drown me this time,"

"So you're just going to stay here, alone?"

"I'm not alone," she reaches into the bag we packed and pulls out a book. "The students of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry are here with me,"

Of course, "Only you would bring a book to a lake,"

"And only you would love the girl who brings books to lakes," she shoots back.

"That's true,"

...

"Jayda! How are you still reading, and it's dark," I yell while floating in the water; it's like if I don't tell her to put the book down, she won't!

"The stars!" she shouts back.

"What?" Sometimes Jayda makes no sense. Half of the time, I have no idea what she is even talking about.

"The stars light up the night just enough for me to see the page in front of me,"

"Well, how about you put the book down and come look at me? I'm very nice to look at," I say.

She looks up from her book finally and says, "I'd rather read."

This girl always has a fucking come back. I walk out over the lake and to where she is; she watches me intensely as I stride over. I can see the hunger in her eyes that she has for me; she looks back down at her book in nervousness. I kneel on the cover and take the book out of her hand.

"What are you doing?" she whines but lets me take the book from her grasp.

"I never thought the day would come when I would become jealous of a book," A fucking book!

"Is there something you want?" she questions now on her knees also. Though we are both kneeling, I still have an advantage in height; she's so small compared to me, standing and kneeling. She wraps her arms around my neck, playing her thumb right on the back of it.

Even in the dark, her brown eyes light up the night. When I look into her eyes, I see the universe behind them, while everyone else just sees the brownness. 

Her eyes carry broken and mended stars with unsaid poetry that only I am able to read.

She leans in and kisses me, igniting everything inside of me; I've been with alot of people but none like her, I know that's very cliche to think, but it's the truth.

When you meet your soulmate, no other person before them could ever compare to the other half of your soul that's in front of you.

Jayda pulls away, smiling widely. It's almost like she heard everything I just said. "God, you're so beautiful," I say, and she blushes because she still doesn't recognize the beauty held in and outside of her. I take my thumb and draw it across her bottom lip.

She's pure; she has a heart of gold, and when she smiles, even the angels above smile back at her beautiful soul.

Leaping back in, I kiss her softly; she lies down on her back with me on top of her, one hand on her hips side and the other propping me up. Moans escape her mouth from the brief seconds our lips part; she pulls me closer to her, wanting more of me. God knows I want more of her, but... I don't think she's ready; hell, I'm not ready.

I would stay with Jayda forever, even if she never had sex with me. She means more to me than just sex.

If she wants to lose her virginity to me, then it will become the greatest responsibility I will ever have. You're always connected to your first in a special way; suppose she does allow me to take her virginity. In that case, I will be responsible for never breaking her heart, something I'm honestly not confident I can do.

I say the wrong things; I'm quick to anger which means that I'm quick to say something hurtful to her. It's the last thing I want to do, but sometimes the anger has blinded me so much; I forget that I'm talking to not some random girl, but the girl whom I love.

I pull back, tearing my lips from hers, "What wrong?" she asks with searching eyes.

"I can't do this," I lift myself off of her.

"What? Why... why not?" she sits up beside me. "Did, did I do something wrong?"

And there she goes blaming herself for something once again, "No, Jayda, of course not," I tell her in the most assuring way I can; her eyes tell me that she doesn't believe me. "I just, I can't have sex with you,"

"I don't understand,"

"I don't want to hurt you,"

A smile shows on her lips, "Don't flatter yourself," she laughs.

"I wasn't talking about that," I roll my eyes; I mean that also, but that's the least of my worries. I shake my head and look at the moon reflective lake in front of us.

"Then what are you talking about?"

"I just can't take your virginity okay," I can't explain to her what I mean because I myself don't understand what I mean. This is infuriating; if she was any other girl, I wouldn't be here contemplating if I should or shouldn't have sex with them, I would have done it and been on my way. I like having sex; I enjoy it, maybe a little too much; sex means nothing to me, but having sex with Jayda will make it mean everything.

"Ryder," Her warm hand touches the side of my face bringing me to look at her, "You're not taking my virginity; I'm giving it to you. I love you, I choose you," she places her leg over the top of me and straddles my lap, sliding her hand through my hair, "I'd choose you, a thousand times over, in this life and the next,"

Jayda POV

I watch him closely. He has to know that I am okay with this and that I want it to happen. Behind his eyes, I can see him contemplating if we should do this. I want to; I am one thousand percent confident. But he still seems wry, and I have no idea why. I bring his lips to mine and kiss him again; I know he feels what I feel whenever our lips meet; he has to feel the same pleasure build up in the pit of our stomach and the same Deja vu feeling in our minds like we have been together all our lives, reliving the same love time after time.

He uses one of his hands to undo my bikini bra strap. He unties it and then slowly pulls the straps off, exposing my breast. Then his grip around my waist tightens, and he flips me back over, placing me on my back. I can't believe we're about to do this.

Ryder unties the strings to the bottom of my bikini, and in the middle of my stomach, I immediately get arousal sensations. My body always responds to his touch. He says, "I guess it's a good thing we're doing this out here; that way, no one can hear your screams,"

My mouth drops open, and he laughs while kissing my neck. He takes one of my breasts into his mouth, and my head dips back as he plays with my nipple around his tongue; I moan his name, and even though I can't see him, I can fill him smiling against me. One of his fingers slips in me, and he moves it in and out; heat builds in my stomach. Thank goodness we are by the lake; though it is humid outside, the chilly lake water forms a cool draft around us.

"Do you... have a... condom?" I ask between breathless pants.

He stops doing everything and then looks at me, saying, "Of course not, I wasn't informed that we would be having sex today,"

I frown; he always has a fucking comeback. "So how-"

"There are other ways," I only know one other way, the way that our sex ED teacher told us repeatedly not to do because it wasn't for sure safe. But I trust Ryder, I'm sure he's done it before, and if he is comfortable with it, then I should be too.

I watch him as he takes one hand and pulls down his swimming trunks exposing his length to me. I'm more nervous about it going in me than I am at seeing it; I've seen it before, so the size doesn't bother me, but thinking about the enormous size in me makes my stomach clench.

"You're shaking. Are you scared?" he asks me, growing worried. "We don't-. "

"No, I'm just nervous," I tell him. "But a good nervous,"

"It's going to hurt," he tells me, and I gulp. "But you're already wet so, it won't hurt that much,"

"Okay," I say low, writing all this down on my mental notepad as if I am preparing for a test. He moves closer; his length is touching me, but not yet in me; he's centimeters away from entering into me, but then a ringing noise startles both of us. I look to the side to find my phone flashing with my dad's name. Dad!

I slide my hand out from under Ryder and then hit decline; the time on the phone shows 11pm, we have been gone all day, and they are probably getting worried . We left early in the morning before my and his parents woke up.

"Okay," I look back at Ryder. He kisses me again, and we both try to get back into the intimate moment.

"Are you ready?" he asks between kisses.

"Mhm," I screw my eyes shut, waiting for the pain that I have been told happens during the first time, but then for a second time, my phone rings, and so does his.

He drops his head between my neck and chuckles. "It's almost like they know what I am about to do to you," he says in my ear, and I shiver.

I take both of our phones and shut them completely off for no more disturbances. "We don't have to do this; we can go. Do you want to leave?" he asks looking into my eyes, running his tongue along his bottom lip.

"No," I shake my head fast. I can't leave now, now there's no going back.

"Okay," he takes his hand and pushes my curly hair back, "If it's too much, just tell me to stop," He kisses me as he slowly presses in me; my eyes slam shut as I let out a moan. He asks if I am okay between the kiss. I tell him, yes and then he pushes in even more. I clutch the sides of the blanket, trying to suppress the pain by grabbing it.

"It hurts," Breathlessly whisper.

"Do you want me to stop?"

"No," It's an uncomfortable, slightly painful hurt, but I think I can take it for now. He asks if he can move, and I tell him yes. He slowly slides out and then back in; now it hurts even more than before; I wince and moan at the same time and keep my eyes shut—dampness forms around my eyes from the pain.

To calm me and take my mind off the discomfort, he starts to kiss me all over, my lips and both sides of my cheeks. Then my neck and breast. It relaxes me and takes my mind off the foreign feeling in me. He takes my hand within his and places it over top of my head. Our hands intertwine, and I squeeze his hand tightly; this is better than grabbing the cover.

"Fuck," he moans in my ear as he slides out again and then moves back into me. His warm tongue enters my mouth, meeting with mines. His hips roll against me; I take my other hand and rest it on his shoulder, digging my nails into his skin. He sucks the skin on my neck, bringing it between his teeth; I watch as his muscles contract with the black ink embedded on his arms.

He's enjoying this so much, I know, after all this time, he and I are finally together, like this. It's what Ryder and I have been waiting for. I'm glad we did not rush it; I'm glad we didn't hop into anything too soon while we were both in bad places.

He's to thank for that; if I had it my way, I would have had sex with him right in the hotel in Georgia; if he was any other guy, he would've had sex with me, with no hesitation, but he didn't; instead, he made sure that we waited and fixed ourselves before we became sexual tied to each other and that is why this moment is so special for him and me.

I wonder if the ones in the stars are smiling down on us, or maybe they have turned away, allowing Ryder and I to have this beautiful moment to ourselves. It feels like just he and I are the only people on the planet right now.

The stars, along with the moon, are cheering in the heavens above and lighting up this night for us. Ryder and I are creating a memorable unforgettable moment, right here on the bank of the lake, making love underneath the stars.

I close my eyes, wanting to hold on to this night. I run my hands up the back of his head and through his hair, pulling him even closer as he thrust into me. "Ryder," I moan his name, knowing that's exactly what he likes.

"I love you so much," he says against my neck.

"I love you," A tear rolls down my cheek as I look up at the sky. "I love you," I say again; I need him to always know that! He looks at me, and without verbally speaking, we both have an understanding that we each are about to come; I hold on to the look in his eyes, the look of pure wholehearted love he has for me, I dip my head back as the feeling takes over, and he pulls out turning onto his side, releasing.

I immediately press my legs together to dull the empty ache between me. I lay flat on my back, taking deep breaths. After cleaning himself off, he looks over at me and asks, "Are you okay?"

"I'm great, sore but great," I look over to him. "Did I do okay?" I ask, still trying to catch my breath.

He frowns and says, "You did great. It was the best I ever had. That was all new to me also. I never knew sex could feel that way. Now I know it's different when you do it with someone you love,"

He loves me, so he will forgive me! I remind myself.

He turns over and grabs his t-shirt out of the bag handing it to me. I slip it over top of my head and then wipe my tears away, turning my head the other way. "Why are you crying?" he asks.

I sniffle and say, "I will always love you, Ryder, okay?"

His brow creases, "Okay,"

"Even if one day you realize that you don't want me anymore," I cry even harder now, not even meaning to. I don't remember hearing or reading anywhere that you get overly emotional after sex. But here I am crying hysterically.

He scoots closer to me and cups my face in his hands, "Don't say that, Jayda,"

"But-"

"I want this forever; I want you forever, it will always only be forever with you,"

Our foreheads rest against each other, "You mean everything to me. No matter what happens, always remember that," I say.

He kisses my lips. I place both of my hands at the sides of his face and say, "Promise me, you will never forget tonight and how you feel about me right here this instant,"

"Ja-"

"Promise me!" I need to hear him say it.

"I promise,"

I lay back on the blanket; he lays back also. He looks back over at me, worried, not understanding why I am so adamant about him, promising me to never forget the love he has for me. "You're my soulmate Jayda. You know that, right?"

"I do," I say; I've always known; I just never wanted to accept it. I fell for him before I even realized I did. I fell for him and I'm still falling.

"Do you think the universe fights for soulmates to be together?" I ask.

He thinks about my question for a second, "I think the universe has no control over soulmates destined love, so it puts things in our path to keep soulmates apart, because once they are together, then they will reach there happily ever after, and the universe is against that," he says. "So no, the universe doesn't fight for destined souls; it destroys them,"

His words crush me even more because I know it's the truth. "I think that's the smartest thing I have ever heard you say," I want to cry, but instead, I just laugh, so he won't worry; we both look back at the starry sky.

Holding each other's hands as we look up at the stars, stargazing at night with a comfortable silence between him and me.

When he finds out, I hope we will still always be able to watch the stars under the same sky, even if we are miles apart.

I'm not sure about a lot of things in my life, but I am sure of one thing: Ryder is my soulmate.

Were stars aligned in the freaking universe that causes some type of astronomical power to beam down on just me and him driving us to love with a love greater than fucking love itself.

Soulmates. We are two people whose minds have mutual connections, an unconditional love, and total understanding for each other. Two souls whose love is stronger than life itself as we walk together side by side through darkness and light.

There are only two things to thank for this divine power that creates soulmates every lifetime, and that's...

Fate and destiny.

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(This chapter! Best chapter I think I've written in the series! Like IDK it's just something about it, even without the sex scene like I would still love it! This chapter definitely got a special place in my heart. Hope you all enjoyed It as much as I did.

How are we feeling? did you like it? Do you guys think this was the right time for them to you know😏? Was it worth the wait?

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