I stared blankly out the window the entire ride. The scenery passed by, hardly noticing which direction he was driving in. I barely acknowledged as he pulled into a parking spot, shutting the engine off. For the first time in a long time, my mind is numb, not my body. My brain is not working, nothing is registering. I have no emotions left to present. I'm blank, cold, and empty inside. When you hit rock bottom, it will do this to you. Your body will go through everyday notions on autopilot. Imagine watching yourself in a dream, but unable to interact. This is how I feel right now.

The coldness eagerly rushes in the moment the door flies open. It swirls around me, nipping away at my bare flesh. But I don't respond or try to hide from it. His touch is warm and reassuring against me. My body moves in the direction he takes me. I follow him blindly, unsure of where we're going. He leads me up the steps, in through the door, and down the hallway, we continue walking. There is a faint sound of keys jingling somewhere off in the distance. A soft swooshing sound as he pushes the door open, ushering me inside.

The moment the door closes, I snap out of it. A rush of noise and sensation flood back into my body. He hangs his keys on a large hook beside the door before leaving me, standing alone. I watch him walk over to the nearby dresser, rummaging through its contents.

Looking around his dorm room it's nothing like mine. It's larger, with higher ceilings, and a wider, more vast floor plan. Instead of the smaller singular twin beds, my room has this one has larger full-size beds. Besides the bed, each side of the room contains a small closet rather than one large one with dividers like ours.

I can tell right away which side is his without having to ask. Like Sky's, his bed has an enormous, thick, black comforter. A similar pile of throw blankets sits neatly along the footboard. Several posters he has hung up are the same as hers. You can see the similarity in their styles. Beside his bed is an oak chest adorned with an alarm clock and a small iron lamp, surrounded by several pictures. I take a few steps forward, inspecting the small frames.

One frame contains a small photograph of a smiling Sky wearing a blood-red dress. Her arms were positioned around Hayden's broad shoulders. He looks so handsome in an all-white tux. Both of them are smiling and happy. Another one is his graduation photo. He's standing beneath a large tree, holding his diploma proudly. His green robes are swaying in the wind. He looks strange in this one without his tattoos. And the last one is of him and some man I have never seen before. He's larger and rougher looking with huge muscular arms. He has more tattoos than Hayden does. They look happy seated on a log with a raging fire in front of them. They're both smiling, holding up cans of beer.

His room resembles him, where his roommate must be a jock. Football trophies cover the tables and dressers. Multiple colored ribbons hang beside his bed. He has no pictures, only posters of half-naked women hung on the walls. His bedding is more vibrant. A bright blue and green checkered pattern blanket lies tossed on the unmade bed.

Beside the bed is a wooden chair with a black and red varsity jacket, hanging on its backside. I giggle, wondering if he was the douchebag that April had been eyeing on my first day. Wouldn't that be ironic? According to some people Sky and I are a weird combination. I wonder what they would say about these two?

"I know you're cold. Do you want some warm clothes to change?" my eyes follow him, walking over to turn the TV on.

I nod in response, not wanting to talk yet. I continue checking out the room. For two males living here, it's cleaner than I would have thought. It smells good too. It has an apple cinnamon mixed with fresh laundry soap scent lingering in the air.

"Here, even if you're not speaking to me. I don't need you getting sick with cold clothes on my watch," he smirks, tossing several articles of clothing at me. Without hesitating, I strip my old shirt off, tossing it to the ground. The shirt he had chosen for me is an older black t-shirt that falls along my mid-thigh. His black and red boxers aren't very visible beneath the shirt. I had felt his eyes on me the whole time I was changing. But I refuse to let him see me acknowledge his stare.

Now it's my turn to watch him. He has no problem locking eyes with me. My body excites at the mere sight of him removing his shirt. His tan skin glistens in the soft light. I imagine my lips trailing along the black squiggles sprawled across his chest. My tongue traces each line, up and down. Stop! You can't go down this road right now. I continue reminding myself until a fresh white tee covers his chest. In my moment of daydreaming, he had already switched into a pair of grey sweatpants. His large, prominent manhood is outlined perfectly in his pants. I have to pry my eyes away from his midsection.

Making an excuse to break out of our staring contest, I walk over, plopping down on the small black sofa in the corner. Hayden stands above me, draping a small grey throw blanket across my bare lap. I'm surprised by how quickly my body has warmed up. It might have something to do with my sexual urges, but who knows?

My stomach lets out a loud growl, my cheeks flushing a deep ruby red. Because of the earlier drama, I left so fast, that I hadn't finished my drink. Once again, caught up in Hayden, I had forgotten to eat.

"There isn't anything here to eat and I don't feel like getting out again. We can order a pizza for dinner if you want and watch some movies?" he casually says, joining me on the sofa.

After a few failed attempts, we finally agreed on a pizza place. A few moments later, we reached a compromise on the toppings. Bacon, pepperoni, jalapenos, and pineapples are such a strange combo. I sit patiently beside him, as he orders the food while using the remote to flip through channels.

It feels so weird being here in his room. Normally we're always in mine, sleeping or fighting. We never sit around, hanging out like friends. I don't know how to act around him. We both stupidly confessed our feelings for each other. Then he ghosted me. The only reason I'm even here is because I chased him down like a crazy person, forcing him to talk to me. I had to have a complete mental breakdown, guilting him into feeling sorry for me.

"Anything specific you want to watch?" he asks, breaking the ice.

"It doesn't matter as long as it's not too gory or a porno," I laugh, snuggling under the blanket, settling in. Without warning, he lifts the blanket. His strong grip grabs my arm, pulling me towards him. Instead of resisting, I give in, climbing onto his lap. My legs straddle across him, resting on either side. His grasp around me tightens, bringing my body closer to his. My arms rest on his shoulders, my fingers playing in his hair. The remote carelessly hits the ground, unnoticed, by our movements.

His dark eyes pour deeply into mine. Our attraction is too magnetic, there's no point in trying to deny it. Taking the lead, I lean in, my lips tenderly grazing his. I had almost forgotten how much I love the way his lips feel against mine. My lips part, allowing his tongue to slide in. He tastes so good. His tongue rolls across mine, gingerly massaging me.

My body rolls, grinding against his bulge.

"Don't start something you can't finish," he whispers, his mouth nibbling my earlobe. His gentle breath played along the sensitive spot on my neck.

"Hey, you're the one that's scared, big boy. Don't forget it. Besides, you're lucky the food will be here any minute," I tease him, sliding off him, and lying back on the couch. Distance is a good thing right now. I'm too weak and vulnerable around him.

"Is that right?" he purrs, rearranging his body so he's towering over me. I inhale sharply as he lifts my shirt. The coolness strikes against my bare skin. Lowering his face, his lips softly kissing my stomach, before continuing downward.

KNOCK KNOCK! "Momma's pizza and tasty treats delivery" a female's voice interrupts us, causing him to stop. The look in his eye tells me he's disappointed like I am. I can't shake the feeling I have heard that voice before. There's no way it can be her. Can it?

"Don't worry, I'll get it since you aren't presentable. It's ok," I tease, shoving him off of me, nodding towards his protruding manhood. It appears to be attempting an escape from his pants.

"No, I got this, sit back and relax" he jumps up, adjusting himself, pushing his pants down. I adjust my clothing, covering myself up as he strolls over to open the door.

"Well, hey there sexy! Today must be my lucky day. I didn't know this is where your dorm room is" her annoying voice carries through the room. Ugh, it is her. This has to be the universe playing one of its sick jokes on me. Out of all the delivery drivers that work there, they send her. Great.

"Oh hey, how much do I owe you?" Hayden asks, walking back over towards the dresser to get his wallet. Her eyes follow him the entire time. She's completely oblivious to me sitting on the couch.

"$18.75 plus tip. But we could always work out a trade for my tip instead. No one has to know. I can keep a secret," she purrs, trying to sound sexy. Her long bright red nails grip the door, opening it wider. She inspects the room, slowly intruding farther in. Her mouth falls open when she finally notices me, a look of disgust on her ugly face.

"Well, well, what do we have here? I've heard the rumors and knew something big had to happen to make Sky leave. I never imagined they were true. But damn, Hayden, were you that desperate? Surely, the only reason you are here is out of pity. No way he wants some used-up whore like yourself," Sam smirks, tipping her head back in laughter.

"I tried to talk to her and see what had happened, but she wasn't trying to talk about it. Now I see why. I would be super embarrassed if my brother had hooked up with my trashy little roommate too. Out of all the places where I lay my head. Some people lack respect." She's almost inside the door by now, still giggling. Her loud shrill laughter echoed off every surface, magnifying her annoying voice.

"Look, keep your damn voice down. I have neighbors. Here's a twenty and keep the change. Just go, leave. Besides who I sleep with and my family problems are none of your damn business, by the way," Hayden snaps back. He grabs the pizza and shoves a wrinkled bill into her hand with the other.

"Trust me, honey, I get it. You are too good-looking for all this. And I wouldn't want anyone to know if I was banging my sister's slutty roommate, either. It's cool, your little secret is safe with me," she coos, running her finger down the front of his shirt. The money clutched firmly in her hand.

"What is your problem? You haven't liked me since the first time you met me. But it's all good, honey. I know what kind of girl you are. An insecure, jealous little bitch that hates anyone who looks better than her. You make quick judgments about people but are unwilling to get to know them. By the way, he doesn't like it when random whores touch him," I yell, jumping up from the couch. Her words have touched a nerve. How dare she speak about me, like she knows me? She doesn't know what I have been through. Or what I had to overcome to get here.

She stops laughing. Her eyes, now two black slits, stare daggers through me.

"I don't have to know you, sweety, to know you're nothing but trouble. The first time I met you at the bonfire, I saw how you looked at him. I even tried to warn Sky to watch her back. But no, she trusted you. What did she say? Oh yeah, Bex would never do that. I guess she didn't know you as well as she thought. Then let's not forget about you throwing yourself all over that drunk frat guy. I was hoping he showed you a good time, but no. Hayden had to come and rescue the little damsel in distress. But it was all for nothing, ain't that right? The minute some guy from your past swoops in, it's Hayden who?" She smirks, placing her hand over an open mouth, in an omg moment.

"Get your own life in check, bitch, and quit stalking mine. Go fuck yourself, because I know no one wants your nasty ass," I growl at her. My feet walk forward, my fists clenched at my sides.

I'm beyond pissed. Rage is blocking all my senses. The only thing clearly in my mind is wrapping my hands around her scrawny little neck.

"Awe, did the baby's feelings get hurt? The truth is a motherfucker, isn't it?" She sneers, smiling over at Hayden.

Before I have time to think about the consequences I lunge at her. Thankfully, Hayden was one step ahead of me, snatching me mid-air. His arms wrap around my waist, preventing me from grabbing her by her scraggly ponytail.

"Alright, that's enough. Sara, you need to leave now! And I will report this to your manager. And ask you never deliver to this address again," he barks, his free hand forcing her backward toward the door.

"Whatever. Hayden hit me up when you're tired of her dumb ass. It's only a matter of time you know. Before she fucks you over too like she did your sister," she hollers over her shoulder before he shuts the door.

Once the door slams, I stop trying to escape his bear-hold.

"Don't let her words get to you. She isn't worth your time or energy. Everyone around here knows who the real campus slut is. That girl will lick, blow, or fuck anyone that will stand still long enough, man or woman. It doesn't matter. She and Sky go way back to when we were kids. Sometimes I think that's the only reason she puts up with her. I avoid her as much as I can. She's been trying to get me to fuck her for years. I'm good on that though," he laughs, trying to cheer me up.

Once we're both seated, he opens the box. The aroma is intoxicating. I laugh, watching him struggle, trying to remove a piece. When he finally extracts it, half the toppings remain in the box.

"Now eat, so we can watch this lame movie you chose" he nudges me, sliding the box over my way. I know Sam is a horrible human being, but everything she said I did was true. Is that how everyone here views me?

After hearing everything aloud like that, does he view me that way? My thoughts are taking over as I sit here, watching him eat his pizza, hoping for the best.