15. Real or Not Real?

            I didn't know what was going through Damon's head at the moment, but I knew for a fact that I was panicking in my mind. Shit.

            "Get away from her!" Elena roared, barging into the room.

            I shook before her gaze, her brown eyes furious. Damon detached from me, finally, little dribbles of my blood on his lips. I gulped, flickering my gaze from Elena to Damon, back and forth, back and forth. I was waiting for something to happen. Whatever was going to go down wasn't going to be pretty.

            Damon didn't seem to be out of his thirsty mode because his eye whites were red, and he hissed at Elena. I flinched away from the sound. Elena bared her teeth at him. I was debating whether or not to crawl away from the situation before limbs got torn off in the room. Odds were I wouldn't make it out alive, whether literally or figuratively.

            Damon grabbed me lightly by my arms, holding me close to him. I saw his eyes return to normal. He didn't look frightened of Elena. Well, he never really looked scared of anything in the short time I had come to know him.

            "I said"—Elena, with blurring speed, rushed to Damon and ripped him off me, tossing him across the room—"get away from her."

            I stayed stuck to the bed, watching Elena stand protectively in front of me, with her hands turning into claws at her sides. Damon picked himself up, brushing himself off. Elena hissed at him. I gulped, my heart thumping nervously—a temptation for two vampires in the bedroom.

            "What the hell did you think you were doing to her?" she roared on. I cowered into the bed more. I had never heard Elena so furious. She hadn't been this bad when she had yelled at me.

            "I was obviously getting a little snack," Damon retorted smartly, wiping off his chin.

            "What's going on?" Stefan appeared in the doorway. My heart dropped. Why not just have Jeremy here too, while we're at it?

            "Your brother decided to snack on Faith!" Elena fumed. I saw her figure quiver. I was waiting for her to snap into predator mode and attack Damon. She swayed forward, but her feet seemed to be stapled to the floor, because she stayed where she was.

            "You have no respect for anybody, do you?" Stefan sighed, shaking his head at Damon. I kept quiet in all this, letting the vampires talk it out.

            "He has no respect for me, that's for sure." Elena put her hands on her hips. "I want answers, now."

            "You might want to patch her up first, Elena," Stefan said calmly. "She's bleeding a little bit still. I can smell it."

            Reflexively, I touched the side of my neck. I made a face as I felt sticky stuff on my hand. I kept it there, afraid to pull it away and see my blood on my hand.

            Elena turned slowly, her eyes going like Damon's had just minutes ago. She closed them, sucking in a long breath. She opened them again, under control. I saw Damon try to slink away, but Stefan didn't budge, and Elena's face hardened—she heard him trying to run away from her fury.

So maybe he was afraid of Elena, he just didn't show it.

            "I think I'll do it instead," Stefan offered. He disappeared and reappeared in five seconds, walking at a human pace towards me. Out of the three vampires with the blood temptation all in the same room together, I trusted Stefan the most.

He sat on the bed, next to me, cleaning me up. He felt like family in a way, like a distant cousin I rarely saw—like Elena.

            Elena whipped around to face Damon again.

            "Well? I said I wanted answers, and I better get them," she muttered darkly. She tapped her foot impatiently.

            "I took advantage of her." Damon shrugged. "I just used compulsion. She didn't know what I was doing." His blue-gray eyes flickered to me for a second. Play along, my brain told me immediately. He's trying to cover our tracks.

            "Are you the reason why she was so weak earlier today? When you took her out, did you feed off her then, too?" Elena demanded of him.

            "Guilty as charged." He smirked. Elena growled at him. She definitely didn't find it funny at all.

            "You have no right to use her as your personal blood bag! This is exactly why I didn't want you around her; because I knew you would do something like this!"

            I saw Stefan's eyes narrow. I stared at him worriedly. Had he seen the other marks? Please be invisible, please be invisible.

            "Elena," Stefan said calmly. "This wasn't the first time he's done this."

            "What do you mean?" Her voice was stiff.

            "She's got faded marks on her."

            "How long has this been going on?"

            "If you two are going to argue, take it out of the room," Stefan said immediately.

            Elena walked briskly, knocking into Damon. I just stared as he followed her out of the room. I couldn't wait to hear how loud the yelling would get.

            "This doesn't bother you?" I asked Stefan as he patched my newest set of wounds. "The blood?"

            "Not really. I've got enough self-control." He smiled smugly, and then sighed. "I hope Elena rips his head off."

            "You can't mean that. He's your brother."

            "Deep down, sometimes I do," he confessed. I shook my head, letting my hair fall over the patch. "I'm going to have to ask Bonnie to make a piece of jewelry laced with vervain so this never happens again."

            Right. Vervain warded off vampires and their powers. Not that I would really need that since Damon didn't use compulsion on me. But it wasn't like Stefan or Elena knew that. Only Damon and I did. It was my job to pretend like I really had been under compulsion.

            "It's bad enough you got brought into this world, let alone the fact that you're dealing with hunters and a witch like we are. You don't need this extra drama." Stefan sighed. "Unfortunately, wherever Damon goes, drama tends to follow."

            "Do you think this is some sort of game?" Elena's voice traveled into the bedroom. "Using her like that?!"

            "She never knew!" Damon moaned.

            "I swear if you didn't have people that cared about you—"

            "Do they fight a lot?" I asked Stefan, trying to tune out their fight.

            "More than you know." He chuckled. "They have more fights than Elena and I do, and we're the ones dating."

            "You would think they'd settle their differences since we've got a common enemy around here."

            "You would think."

            "Now I bet Elena will send you to stay with me instead of Damon when another crisis arises." I laughed dryly. As much as I hated the idea, it was what would most likely happen now that Damon was caught feeding off me.

            I slipped off the bed and walked out of the bedroom. Halfway down the hall, I heard something smack. I yipped, retreating a few steps. Stefan ghosted past me, which nearly made me faint. How in the hell did he move silently like that?

Oh, wait—vampire, right.

            "What's going on out there?" I whispered in horror.

            "Most likely either Elena threw something at Damon, or she threw him across the room," Stefan surmised. Timidly, I shadowed him.

            I saw Damon on all fours. No doubt Elena had just thrown him into the wall. Luckily, he hadn't been tossed at the fireplace with a fire going. Speaking of Elena, she stood at the couch, her face still furious, but her body stature looked peaceful, triumphant even. No doubt she did what she wanted to.

            Elena's gaze found me.

            "If he ever does something like this again, Fay, you tell me, and I'll throw him out," she said.

            "You can't throw me out of my own house," Damon retorted, picking himself up.

            "You really want to test that theory? I'm going to keep a close eye on you around her from now on." She kept her eyes on me. "How're you feeling?"

            "A little dazed and weak," I admitted, leaning against the wall closest to me. "But I'm managing."

            "Do you want me to make you something?"

            "If it'll help." I shrugged.

*      *      *

            Damon ended up keeping away from me whenever Elena was hovering around. She would always give him the dirtiest looks. Ever since Damon was caught in the act, Elena kept him distant from me. I got annoyed with it after a while. Elena had to let up sometime. Then again, she probably had the mindset that she didn't want to screw up again like she had with...Trevor...so she wanted to be on guard at all times.

            Speaking of the issue, Elena's words got me thinking. When she mentioned the whole 'blood bag' thing about me, it made me question some things. The main issue: what Damon and I were. Maybe I had been blinded by all the affection he showered me with to not really consider what this meant to him—what was going on between us. Was it a relationship to him, or something less? A friend with benefits, only the benefits were in favor of him more than me?

            I had a few weak moments during the rest of the day, most of them involved my legs collapsing under me. I was stuck to the couch after my legs buckled a third time. If I had to go anywhere, most likely I'd be carried there. I doubted anybody would trust me walking for the rest of the day if they saw what was going on with me.

            That was another thing that bothered me—my little weak moments. I had never had such things happen before. Why were they happening now? Was it James's doing, from whatever magic Brooke told him to do? That seemed to be the only logical explanation that came to mind. If it was something that James did, I wanted to know what he did to me.

            When night fell, I was sprawled out on the floor. It wasn't exactly comfortable, but it beat having my ass become sore due to sitting on the couch all the time. I could at least stretch out. Stefan had gone out about an hour or so ago, wanting to try and dig for some evidence of the vampire hunters and witch that had attacked me last night. He asked Elena to join him, but she wouldn't have it since it would leave me alone with Damon. I promised her that if anything went wrong, I'd tell her. I did that just so she would get off the issue and leave. She had looked weary when leaving the house, but I knew she had to have some sliver of confidence in me.

            I laid on my stomach, chin resting on my arms. My blue-green eyes flickered to different things in the living room. My eyes hung on the ancient, tall bookshelves. Curious, I picked myself up and took my time crossing the room to the bookshelves. Some of the books looked really dusty. It definitely wasn't like looking for a book in the library.

            All the books were of the past. I grimaced. I wasn't a history buff, so nothing here would interest me.

            "You are quite the actress," Damon purred, slipping his arms around my waist.

            "If I wanted to be more effective, I should've slapped you or something in my fury," I noted.

            "I think sitting there looking scared for your life was good enough. Nobody got suspicious."

            "Still, it would've been a nice touch."

            "You don't feel weak?"

            "Not at the moment. Why?"

            "Just checking," he said thoughtfully. I leaned into him, my fingers skimming his arms. "What's wrong?"

            "Nothing." My voice was low.

            "Faith."

            "Elena had me thinking a lot today."

            "About?"

            "About us."

            "Where are you going with this?" he asked.

            "I want to know the truth from you, Damon, if you can give me it."

            "I told you before, you're in love with me, and I share the same feelings—but they're not as strong."

            Ouch. That kind of hurt a bit.

            "So what you're saying is that this isn't a real relationship to you," I surmised.

            I turned in his arms, craning my head up at him, waiting. There was no way he was going to avoid my question. I could be annoyingly persistent, and I wouldn't hesitate to be for this.

            "When Elena said something about you using me like a blood bag, it made me wonder if—if this didn't mean the same to you as it does to me." I shrugged. "I just want to know what you consider this since you didn't answer me the last time I asked you."

            "I wish you'd let it drop," he said bluntly, looking irritably around the house.

            "I won't until you tell me."

            He sighed. "Look, I'm not sure what I consider...this," he said slowly. "So I can't tell you an answer, Faith, I really can't."

            "You're lying." My brows pulled together. "I know you are. You're trying to push this off further. What are you afraid of?"

            "Nothing."

            "Then tell me," I pleaded. "Because I know what I feel this means to me. It'd be nice to know your opinion."

            "It's a little...confusing for me. At times, I feel like this is something, and other times, it's not—like a friend with benefits kind of thing."

            "What does it feel like right now?" I asked evenly.

            "A friend with benefits." Damon touched the patch on my neck.

            The words bit me just a little bit. So it wasn't the same ideas with me and him. I considered it real, with him it wasn't. I should've figured that. He hadn't changed one bit, the player.

            "So...what we've been doing...it's been for your benefit?" I asked carefully.

            He shrugged. "All I can say is that this feels like a fling."

            That was another shot to my gut. Hold it together, Faith, don't let this break you. You can work your way around this. I had to convince myself that this was Damon's way of hiding his true feelings—feelings that were much stronger than mine were.

            "So what should we do then, since clearly we aren't on the same page?" I prompted. "Is it even worth trying to keep this going?"

            "Yes," he said immediately. "It is." He kissed my forehead tenderly. "Don't give up on this yet, Faith. Okay? I'm not the person I used to be. I'm not going to take advantage of you anymore."

            "Wait. That means no more bites?" I frowned.

            "It's using you to get blood the lazy way," Damon admitted. "Besides, if I do it again, Elena will break the house with me."

            "I'd rather not have that happen." I giggled dryly, yawning.

            "You can't be tired already," he taunted.

            "Considering what I've been through today, I can be," I retorted lightly.

            "Do you need me to carry you to your 'bed'?" He smirked.

            "I'm sure I can walk to the couch just fine." I snorted.

            Damon kissed me swiftly, trying his hardest not to slit my lips with his fangs. I managed to keep my focus after he abandoned me for the night. Taking my time, I slid onto the couch. I squirmed, trying to adjust. Since when was the couch so lumpy under the one cushion where the top half of me usually was? I tested the cushion. Hmm, I guess it's just with the way I'm laying.

            Trying to move past the uncomfortable cushion, I snuggled into the couch as best as I could, ignoring the lump as much as possible. 

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Hmm, seems things are a bit rocky with them now. Good or bad for you guys?**