Zainab's POV

The melodious sound of azaan reverberated in the lulled surrounding which actually brought me out of sleep. I felt a strong pang of pain in my back and legs. Without understanding anything, I opened my eyes and my jaw dropped discerning where I was laying.

I was still squatting down on the carpeted floor near Shaiq's couch and his hand was still intertwined in mine--the same position when I came to him in the night. I must have dozed off there. The interior of the room was still visible to me due to the night bulb which was bathing everything in faint blue color. Shaiq was still sleeping and seeing his calm and relaxed face, a smile appeared on my lips and I literally forgot every pain and uneasiness. This was legit the first time he didn't leave the room before me post coming back and the fact itself sounded so pleasant to me. I place his hand back on his stomach as I crept near him. I leaned closer to him and traced his features with my index finger; his forehead, his eyes, his cheekbones, his nose, and lastly his lips.

My finger along with my stare stopped on his lips which were a mixture of brown and pink colors. I followed the outline of his lips with my thumb. How much I missed his everything. Why did I deprive myself of his love, his warmth, and his touch? Could I not be a little selfish at that time? How much I loved the feel of his gentle and warm lips on mine when he kissed me back then. Despite that, I pushed him away from me. I bent over and pecked his cheek while inhaling his scent which smelled nothing but sandalwood.

"Give me a chance, Shaiq, and I will set everything in its place," I whispered while unknowingly a tear fell from my eye.

I wiped my right cheek with my palm before standing up. I was not sure what time it was but it would surely not be more than seven as it was the fajar time and the reason I woke up was due to my uncomfortable sleeping position. 

I went straight into the bathroom and performed wudhu. After coming back into the room, I covered myself in a big shawl, laid down the prayer mat, and said my fajar prayer. After the namaz, I spread both palms in front of my face for dua.

"Oh Allah, YOU are the most gracious and most merciful. YOU are Almighty Allah who just commands: be and it happens. Please give my Shaiq back to me. Please let him become the Shaiq who was my best friend again. YOU said YOU don't burden a soul beyond it can bear and now I cannot bear Shaiq's anger and stranger self. Give him back to me, Oh Allah. Please give him back to me..." I stopped as I was sobbing from tears now. I swept my hands across my face before getting up.

I folded the prayer mat and delicately placed it back on the study table. It was already seven as I could see the time on the clock hanging on the front wall of the room. I needed to leave for my office too. I again laid a glance on Shaiq who was still sleeping. My eyebrows gritted in confusion. Why was he not waking up? Perhaps he didn't have to go to his work today. I nodded lazily as I mentally assured myself of the same thing before going back to the washroom to take a bath.

As I was drying my hair with a towel, I peeked through the mirror to find Shaiq finally waking up. He sat up and rubbed his eyes with his fist as his stare found my figure and he stopped his movement. I turned around and gave him my best smile whose gaze was still fixed on me.

"Will you go to your office today?" I asked him.

He nodded his head before his eyes narrowed in confusion. "Why did you ask?"

"You were still sleeping that's why I thought you are going to take a break today, " I replied, truthfully.

"No breaks, to be honest. I just joined someone's business as his partner and I just can't skip work like this whenever I want. I need to be regular despite how much I hate to wake up early in the morning," he explained while a faint smile crossed his lips.

I grinned before walking near him and stood just an inch away from him, "I know you even hated to go to school, college and university too because of the same reason. I remembered once you said you would enroll in evening classes even for the sake of your sleep. And I am happy there is at least something which did not change in you even if it is---"

I deliberately paused realizing what I just said. Shaiq's face too turned grim and his lips tightened in a thin line. He stood up from the couch and went into the bathroom without sparing me a single glance.

I bit my lower lip as my eyes came to a halt on the closed door of the bathroom.

"I miss you, Shaiq, " I whispered under my breath, getting astonished by my quivering voice.

                     _________________________

As I was putting important papers in my black file when I heard Shaiq's groan. He just came back after taking a bath. I turned on my heels to find him standing in front of the mirror.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

He looked at me right after, "nothing. Just my button has popped out," he complimented his words by grabbing the torn button in his fingers.

"I'll knit it again," I suggested him.

"No need, I'll change the shirt," he declined quickly.

"You don't have any other shirt ironed except this one, Shaiq," I reminded him at which he sighed in annoyance.

"It won't even take a minute, believe me," I told him with a smile. Taking his silence as acceptance, I strode towards the closet. Opening the bottom-most drawer, I picked out the box containing needles and threads and walked back to him. Taking out a white thread that complimented the color of his shirt, I insert a small piece of it in the needle.

"Where is the button?" I asked, in between trying to put the thread in the needle.

Getting no reply from him, I looked back at him who was already staring at me blankly.

"Shaiq?" I again called him

"Huh?...Hmm?...What did you say?" He stuttered on his own words, the suddenness of it, I couldn't understand.

"I need your button," I answered at which he frowned his forehead before opening his palm, having the button.

"Here," he mumbled.

I quickly took the button from his hand and in this while, my fingers got brushed against his palm, sending shivers down my spine.

Abating the unusual feelings, I kept my whole focus on fastening the button on his shirt. I leaned towards his chest and cut the remaining thread with my teeth.

"It's done," I announced when I straightened my body.

I grabbed the box from the dressing table and placed the thread and the needle back in it. I was about to walk away when Shaiq held my right arm and pulled me towards him. I looked up at him in confusion when I still couldn't find any emotion on his blank face and stone eyes.

"It's still not done, " he mumbled in a low voice.

"What do you mean? I made sure it won't fall again," I said and touched his button again with my finger, "look it's been fixed."

I looked into his eyes for assertion. Before I could move away from him, he cupped my hand with his which was still placed on his chest. I was still not done contemplating his action when I found his other hand on my face. He slowly caressed my cheekbone with his thumb. I felt like electricity passed through my whole body on this mere contact.

His fingers brushed against my jaw, cheeks, neck before finally hiding in my hair. He ran his hand through my still damped hair all the way from my shoulders to my backbone where they ended. I didn't know what got into his mind at that time. I found his pupils dilated and the black in his eyes became darker and brighter.

"Your hair is still so beautiful, Zainab," he whispered as he took a handful of my hair in his palm, "so elegant, so long; the same as when I last saw them five years back."

He was right; the last time he saw my open hair was five years ago. Because I stopped caring about myself for many years. The heavy burden of being the only breadwinner of my family made my heart almost dead and my life turned colorless. These things aggravated more when he stopped talking to me after going abroad. I was going through so many stressors at that time that I wondered how I still was alive.

"Except their thickness. A few years ago, I took so much stress due to no financial support that my hair started to fall terribly. They are just a handful now, " I confessed and took my hair in my hand, a way to prove my words.

Shaiq's face turned pale all of a sudden and then I realized, I shouldn't have said it. Two years ago, when Daniyal paid off Shakir's debt, we were left with no money except a few just to meet our everyday needs and Daniyal's medicines. I even froze my one semester since I had no cash to pay the fee. After this, I started doing two more part-time jobs along with the one I was already doing at the coffee shop.

"No financial support?" Shaiq repeated my words in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"Nothing. I have to go. Goodbye, " I asserted before making a distance from him by taking my hand out of his grip. I looked at him for a split second then turned around with a thought in mind to leave the room.

Before I could even move, Shaiq grabbed my wrist and hurled me so that now I was facing him. He put his thumb and index finger under my chin to lift my face and looked intently into my eyes.

"Tell me; what do you mean by what you said earlier?" He again stressed the same thing.

"What's the use now, Shaiq? Don't think about it seriously. It just came out of my mouth, " I said, giving him a sad smile.

"But I kept on sending money for you, Zainab. For your expenses, for Daniyal's treatment, and your fee. For everything! I asked Mom to give you that money every month. Then what?" He let out in uncertainty and my smile got deeper as my eyes became teary.

"I didn't use it. How could I use someone's money when he didn't like to talk to me anymore. Who was angry at me. Who didn't consider me his friend anymore. You already did more than enough by giving your share of the property to Daniyal and after that, there was no need seriously..." I wipe the torn corner of my right eye so that tears wouldn't overflow. 

"You already did so much for me. You saved me from Shakir by marrying me, you sacrificed your friendship, you gave up your property and then I didn't want to selfishly get another favor from you. I collected that money you sent me and thought I would give it back to you once you will be back but you did--"

"Are you insane, Zainab? You are my wife and that money was your right. I didn't do any favor, for God's sake. Why in the world did you torture yourself like this?" His voice turned high. The suddenness of which made me flinch.

"I didn't torture myself. I tortured you by not believing in you. I am sorry. I really am. Whatever I used to say was a lie- a pure lie. I too fell in love with you. I considered you my husband. Your voice, your touch, your everything still sends me on cloud nine in ecstasy. I just sent you away at that time for your sake. I thought you were lying. I was never selfish, Shaiq. I was never..." I trailed off when the bulk of tears in my throat didn't allow me to speak anymore.

I sobbed hardly when he abruptly pulled me into his chest. He wrapped his arms around my waist while resting his face on my head. Just this was needed and I cried my heart out and poured out my every emotion on his chest. I clenched the front of his shirt in my fist and my fingers brushed against the skin of his chest as I wanted to store his feel permanently in my heart. I didn't know whether it was a dream or a reality. But I yearned to savor it. Stock his fragrance, his closeness, and his touch just like a bird stored his food beforehand for the handy situation in the future. Even the warm touch of his lips on top of my hair didn't help me in differentiation. I just could feel his small kisses on my head.

After a while, he pulled me away from himself and cupped my cheeks in his palms.

"You silly girl, you have always been my best friend. How can you even think I can become angry at you? Your Shaiq is nothing without you. Your trance never let me for once stop thinking about you," he whispered while caressing my jaw.

I stared up at him with wide eyes. He smiled at me while placing my both hands in his bigger one. If it was a dream, I never wanted to wake up.

Bring his face closer to mine, he settled his forehead on mine while with one hand, he placed my hand on the left side of his chest. His heart was beating exactly opposite of my palm, giving an idea his heartbeats got faster due to my hand.

"I still can't see you crying, Zaini. My heart aches like someone is chopping it into small pieces when you cry. Please stop crying," he whispered before bending down to my level. I was expecting him to wipe my face with his fingers but little did I know, he kissed away my tears, taking every one of them to his lips.

Placing his both hands on either side Of my neck, he pecked my forehead,  followed by my eyelids, my cheeks then finally my nose tip. Those kisses felt like a cool shadow in the scorching sunlight to me.

Shaiq brushed my lower lip with his thumb before looking back into my eyes. "You have no idea how much I missed you. How hard it was to cover everything up."

I abruptly looked up at him at this statement, "huh? Cover-up? What are y--"

"Ssh..." He hushed me up by placing his fingers on my lips, "don't say anything."

I found a different gloss in his eyes; desire, love, care, hurt, and regret. Everything was present at the same time. When he once again ran his finger on my both lips, shivers ran down my spine on this.

Shaiq leaned near to my face, his stare fixed on my lips. His minty breath hovered all over my face before he captured my lips in his chilled and cold lips. He brought me closer to him by placing his hand on the small of my back. I closed my eyes to feel his touch but then instantaneously, he pulled away. I hissed as I  looked at him again.

"Are you okay?" He asked in a husky voice. And I knew right away what he aimed to implore by covering it up under this particular question. Whatever was happening at this moment was a replica of what had occurred five years ago. It was going fine until that thought crossed my mind that he was lying and I pushed him away...away for forever.

Right now, I just had one way to get him assured that I was, had always been okay with it. I grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him down so that his face was directly in front of mine. Shaiq stared at me with his eyes popping like a saucer. I slammed my lips on his while wrapping my both arms around his neck. Shaiq turned stiff for a while before clasping my slim waist with his both hands, pulling me more towards himself so that my chest pressed against it. He used his one hand to cup my right cheek to kiss me urgently like his life and death were based on it. I clasped his soft hair on the back of his neck in my fingers as I tried to extract his love, care, and affection. 

If it was a dream, I wanted it to never end.

If it was real, I would continue to cherish him as no one had ever done.

                  
                     _________________________

Assalam o Alaikum/ Hello guys!

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I didn't know before writing that this chapter will turn out to be so extensive. But here it is hehe.

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