Um hi I haven't updated since the beginning of January O_o

well...

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO... FLYNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!

also,

I found some online news articles about Orlando and the descriptions are just...

"ORLANDO BLOOM FROLICKING SHIRTLESS" EXCUSE YOU INTERNET

"AFTER A LEISURELY SWIM"

"THE STAR'S ATHLETIC PHYSIQUE WAS FURTHER HIGHLIGHTED IN A PAIR OF BOLD YELLOW TRUNKS"

"HIS LONG BROWN LOCKS SOAKED UP THE SALT WATER AS HE ATTEMPTED IN VAIN TO PULL THE HAIR BACK AWAY FROM HIS FACE"

"HE ACCENTED HIS TONED TORSO WITH SEVERAL NECKLACES"

"THE WARM WATER POURED DOWN HIS BACK AS HE CONTEMPLATED THE VISTA"

"HER BLONDE LOCKS FLOWED LOOSELY TO HER SHOULDERS AS SHE SPORTED A HUGE SMILE WHILE SIPPING ON A FROZEN BEVERAGE"

another article by the same people:

"ORLANDO DRESSED IN THE STYLISH BUT UNDERSTATED LOOK OF BLACK PANTS WITH A BLACK AND WHITE STRIPED LONG SLEEVE TOP AND SHOE LACE-FREE BLACK LEATHER HIGH TOP SNEAKERS"

"HIS HAIR WAS CASUALLY THROWN IN A BUN AND HIS GLASSES POPPED UP ON THE TOP OF HIS HEAD, THE ACTOR SEEMED VERY RELAXED"

another:

"THE CLEAN SHAVEN ACTOR SLICKED HIS BROWN HAIR BACK INTO A TAUT BUN AND PAIRED HIS GREY TOP WITH CHARCOAL TROUSERS"

"-FINISHED OFF WITH A RUGGED BLACK JACKET THAT ROLLED JUST ABOVE HIS CHARACTER'S WRIST TATOOS"

I swear, if my English teacher had an online news magazine, this would be it.

And some of it was just funny.

"Accented" with "necklaces"
"Bold yellow trunks" (that just gets me okay)
"The stylish but understated look"
"Long brown locks soaked up the salt water"

I'm sorry.
It's hilarious.