a/n: I'm changing the name of this book to Fanboy | Taegi, rather than Instagram | Taegi. So when the next update arrives, please don't be confused... it's still the same book.

-

Yoongi POV [Starting from a few hours before the final meeting]

"Namjoon, I swear I'll be fine." I pushed off my clingy bandmate, "I still have to finish up that Cypher I promised Taehyung. I swear I will come home after then."

His gaze darkened at the mere mention of his name, and he scowled at me. Jiminie stood by his side, face downcast. I had never seen Jimin so sad in all the years I had known him, but being Taehyung's best friend, I knew it all had taken a toll on him too.

"Yoon," Namjoon mumbled, but it was loud. "Face it, he's not coming back."

"Joon," I responded, tone equally flat. "He's my Taehyung."

"He'll realize that sooner or later."

"For your sake, I hope he does come around." Jimin whispered sadly, "I hate seeing you like this, Hyungie."

"I'm sorry you had to see me in this state, Chim." I smiled, ruffling his hair a little, "Thank Jin hyung for the food, and I promise to eat it well."

"Tell Gguk that we're going for Irish bombs and lamb skewers soon." I tried to lighten up, but the grimace still stayed on my face. "We haven't gone out in months."

"I'll make sure to tell him, hyung." Jimin smiled, but I could see the pain in his expression. "And again, thank you for asking us to feature in those songs. We'll do our best to sound good."

"I know you will." I shrugged, "We'll start recording the first two soon. I have three more, and a new Cypher to complete. We'll record those next month."

"A new Cypher??" Jimin looked surprised, "But why?"

"Ah, I had promised to make Taehyung one, and I'm not breaking it anytime soon," I replied coolly, ignoring the younger boy's wide-eyed expression. Namjoon looked tired of the whole thing, and I know he wasn't happy with me staying late.

"If you need anything, you can just call me or Hobi okay?" he mumbled, "Or if you don't want us, TXT is still working downstairs. They'd be only too willing to help, knowing how much they worship the ground you walk on."

I chucked, waving the duo goodbye and closing the door halfway before sitting back down tiredly. I looked at the lyrics I had already written and smiled. It was a good song, one of my first ones about heartbreak. My usual lyrics were all rap, and mostly with underlying double meanings, swear words, and disses to my haters.

But this?

Namjoon had read through the two songs I had already written, and he couldn't believe it was me, me who didn't believe in love who had written songs about the most intense, heartbreaking form of it. Even Bang PD approved the song immediately and agreed with the collab with the trio from Bangtan. Taehyung had refused to open my texts and I reckoned he didn't want to have to do anything with me.

And I respected that.

I was just about to reach out for my book and pen when my phone started pinging with new notifications.

I knew all too well that it was people tagging me in posts that concerned either my health or Taehyung. And just clicking on the cursed app, my eyes landed on vantae's and kimkai's most recent post.

Date night.

It stung. A lot.

But somewhere in the corner of my heart, I knew that there would be a silver lining to this entire situation. So I just replied to a few comments by my salty, angered bandmates, gently chuckling to myself at the creative ways fans found to gently diss Kim Jongin.

Namjoon yet again asked me to reconsider and come home, but for some reason, I got a feeling that I should stay at the studio for a little while longer. I had to eat Jin hyung's home-cooked meal anyways, and curling up on my sofa for the night didn't seem like a bad idea.

After sending my usual daily message to Tae, I sat down to work, heart a little heavy for some reason. Why was I worried so much about him? He could freeze in the cold, but that was not my biggest concern.

Yet, I shook it out of my mind before going about my efforts at being a lyricist.

And almost an hour later, my phone started going crazy again, and I knew it had to be something about him because otherwise, people wouldn't keep tagging me in all those posts for nothing. And when I saw the picture of them kissing, I put the phone down quietly. My heart ached by seeing just that one photo, and it took me all the self-control in the world from bursting into tears.

A pocketknife lay on my table, and I closed my eyes, forcing myself away from it, knowing that if I did get it in my grasp, it would be a lost cause. It was always like this. I would start to get better, and something or the other would always make me lose progress.

"Hey, Taehyung loves you," I said out loud; a meager attempt to reassure myself. "He'll come back."

But there was also the nagging little voice that sneakily whispered, "But he's gone, Yoongi. He hates you now."

But I wasn't going to let it get to me.

"You wait-" I whispered, smiling a little as if I knew something the voice didn't, even though I was heartbroken inside. "He's my boy. He'll come for me."

And I went back to my work, pulling out a new sheet of paper, writing on top with a black marker-

Outro: Tear

And I was surprised at how I easily the lyrics came to me-

[Verse 1: for Namjoon]

Goodbyes are for me, a tear

Without even knowing, it blooms around my eyes

The words that I could not bring myself to say flow down

And lingering regret crawls over my face

To me, you were once my dear

But now you're merely a bitter beer

My heart that's stained with belated self-loathing

Becomes empty even with the passing breeze

At the end of my play where breakup was a lie

The price that I had to pay came to me

If someone said they would turn back the time for me

Would I have been able to be a bit more honest?

The bare face that only I know

The ugly and pathetic old friends within me

Would you still be able to love me again like before

With that smile with which you used to look at me

Stop saying things like forever, forever

After all, the end originally exists

If there's a start, I don't wanna listen to that

Words that are too correct or too much consolation. I don't wanna listen to that

I was just so scared

Because it seemed like perhaps I had never loved you at all

Although it was late, that you were true

That only you loved me

More

-

You're my tear

You're my, you're my tear

You're my tear

You're my, you're my tear

You're my fear

You're my, you're my fear

What more can I say?

You're my-

-

[Verse 2: for Hobi, me]

We walked towards the same place

But this place becomes our last

Although we used to talk about forever

Now we break each other without mercy

Although we thought that we dreamed the same dream

That dream has finally become a dream.

My heart is torn, please burn it instead

So that pain and regret, none of that would be left

-

You're my tear

You're my, you're my tear

You're my tear

You're my, you're my tear

You're my fear

You're my, you're my fear

What more can I say?

You're my-

-

[Verse 3: me]

Goodbyes are T.E.A.R

Because things like tears are a luxury

There's no such thing as beautiful goodbyes

So just begin now

Woo take it easy, slowly carve out my heart

That's right, that's right, gently step on the shards that have shattered

So that regret, regret, such a thing will no longer be left

Please burn up my heart that was torn into shreds

That's right, right there, what are you hesitating for

This is the ending you were wishing for

So go on and kill me without hesitating

Woo yeah yeah burn it

Woo yeah yeah yeah burn it

Woo yeah yeah yeah burn it

So not even the ashes remain

[Verse 4: still me]

This is the real you and this is the real me

Now we've seen the end and not even resentment is left

I've woken up from the sweet dream and I close my eyes

This is the real you and this is the real me

[Verse 5: for Namjoon and me]

We walked towards the same place

But this place becomes our last

Although we used to talk about forever

Now we break each other without mercy

Although we thought that we dreamed the same dream

That dream has finally become a dream.

My heart is torn, please burn it instead

So that pain and regret, none of that would be left

-

[Chorus: all three of us]

You're my tear

You're my, you're my tear

You're my tear

You're my, you're my tear

You're my fear

You're my, you're my fear

What more can I say?

You're my-

-

[Bridge: me yet again, with flawless vocals]

What should I say?

We know

The answer is fixed

But replying is always hard

[Verse 6: for Hobi]

Why are you spilling it?

Why are you tearing it up?

It's useless, to me

Goodbye to me is only those moments (Flashback)

The moment you say words from your mouth

The moment our focus becomes irregular

At the moment where everything is dangerous

Our end that two letters handed to us

That I won't cry, that I won't tear it up

I can't say those kinds of words. In the future I, too

Breakup, incurable disease

You're my beginning and my end, That is all

My meeting and my farewell

You were everything, step forward fear

It will be repeated, caused by you

Tear

Tear

-

[If you skipped the lyrics, trust me, go back and read them. There is no other, and I repeat, NO other song that fits this relationship more than Outro: Tear.]

-

I was weeping as I wrote, tears smudging most of the words as I poured out my heart onto paper. It was true, every word. The song I had written felt so personal, and it was; I had laid my soul bare for someone to sing. But I knew that if Joon or Hobi saw this, they would make me release it. Smiling a little at the thought of them, I put the pen down. Jin's food and coffee sat untouched on my desk still and I stretched, yawning as I wiped my tears on my sleeve.

More texts, more notifications from my phone. Unwillingly, I checked my feed, knowing that yet again, it was going to be about him. I didn't want to know, but curiosity killed the cat, and as my fans say, I tend to be a 'lil meow meow'.

I expected to be hit with a Dispatch announcement with Taehyung confirming his relationship or something, but I was bombarded with reposts from his story. Intrigued, I clicked on his story and furrowed my eyebrows in confusion.

Why did he sound so depressed?

And something else caught my attention; my fingers deftly clicking my inbox to find that all my hundreds of messages, including the ones from a few hours ago, were marked as 'read.'

I decided to stay put and not do anything. I didn't want to confuse him or pressure him into anything.

If he wanted to come to me, I wanted him to run into my arms out of his own free will. I would not pull him to me, even though I was dying to reach out.

Putting my phone away, I put my headphones back on, adding corrections to the Outro I had just written. I had special plans for the song, and I couldn't wait.

I was going to start rapping a demo, just to see how it sounded, when I felt the temperature of the room go down; as if someone had stepped in from the cold, into my heated studio.

Something told me that it wasn't Namjoon coming to forcefully pick me up and take me home.

I turned slowly in my chair, expecting anyone but him.

But there he was, Kim Taehyung with his messy black hair, red tearstained cheeks, and swollen eyes, breathing heavily as I looked at me. He was panting, leaning on the door, still choking back a few sobs when he saw my surprised expression.

I managed to keep my cool, even though my heart was beating wildly. I smiled gently, taking in the sight with disbelieving eyes. Wasn't this the same Taehyung who's pictures were up on Instagram; ones that showed him kissing another man?

"Hi-" I whispered, shaking a little. I slipped off my headphones; and the pen slipped from my fingers, falling to the floor.

He just looked at me, eyes bloodshot and leaking fresh tears.

"Are you okay?" I whispered, my voice still failing me. "Tae, please tell me you're fine."

And no sooner than the words left my mouth, he had bolted.

He ran to me, pulling me out of my cozy chair into his arms.

"I'm fine now." he whispered into my ear, "I'm fine 'cuz I'm here with you."

-

Taehyung POV

I couldn't help it.

I knew I should have begged at his feet for forgiveness before anything, but I couldn't help it.

I wrapped my arms around him, my neck tucked into the crook of his shoulder. I smiled inwardly at how small he was, and how he had to stand on his tiptoes to reach my height. His arms were gently hooked around my waist, not saying a word as he let me hold him close.

"Tell me what happened." he said quietly, "Why are you here, Tae?"

"He tried to rape me, hyung." my voice was weak, the ending effects of the drug still lingering. "He slipped something into my drink."

Whatever I said seemed to be something he had never expected to hear, because the next thing I knew he was crying right along with me, mumbling curses angrily. His grip tightened on my waist, and I welcomed the warmth, snuggling deeper into him.

"Tae, I don't know what to say-" he whispered, considerably shaken. "I'm calling the police right away. He shouldn't get away with it, the bastard."

"Hyung, I'm sorry," I said, finally looking at him. "You all warned me about him, and I still went with him because I wanted to forget my guilt."

"Don't apologize, I'm t-"

"I'm not finished, hyung." I cut in, almost begging. "Please, please hear me out."

"Whatever you may have heard, I was never dating Kai. I only saw him as an acquaintance who could help me forget my hurt. I always made it clear that I would never date him, and that I was yours. I just needed some time alone to heal, and I was going about it the wrong way."

"I screwed it all up so bad that night. I was so caught up in my guilt that I refused to acknowledge yours. I broke your heart, and I made you a cheater and I will never forgive myself for acting like the victim."

"I'm sorry I ignored you this past month, hyung. I just felt so guilty and I didn't want to remember that I had cheated. I treated you like you were the one one who caused it all, and it's not true. You only make me happy, Yoongi hyung."

"Hyung, I've loved you for years. Everything about you, every little flaw, and every little perfection. I loved you from the shadows, as your fanboy, and after I got to know you better, I loved you as a friend. But it runs deeper than that."

"You're it."

"What-?" he whispered, eyes misty.

"You're it, hyung." I smiled through tears, "You're my everything. My soulmate, my partner, my best friend. Hyung, you make me complete."

"We haven't even spent time with each other like that, and yet I know I couldn't live without you. You're the love of my life, and I'm never letting you go, ever again."

"You're it for me." I ended, "You're all I want, and you're all I will ever need."

"I love you, Yoongi hyung."

"I fucking love you."

He smiled, looking into my eyes, and I couldn't help but marvel at how I saw galaxies shining in his black orbs. His arms tightened around my waist, pulling me impossibly closer-

"I love you, Tae." he grinned shyly, gums showing cutely, "Always have, always will."

He was so close now, his nose brushing against mine as I leaned in to finally capture his lips with my own. It was way overdue, his soft pink lips fit so perfectly over mine, and I could taste the stars as he held me. Fireworks burst around us as he smiled into the kiss, deepening it as we switched positions, his arms around my neck as I gripped his chin, tightening my free arm around his back.

"Missed you so-" he mumbled, lips still touching mine, "Never letting you go again-"

"I'm never leaving anyways." I giggled, "I love you too much to stay away, hyung."

"Is that so, love?" he chuckled, peppering kisses all over my cheeks and chin, eyes still glistening. "I like the sound of forever."

"Mmm, me too," I mumbled, "Forever sounds good when it's with you."

He nodded, grinning widely before his face twisted into one of horror.

"I'M TAKING YOU TO THE HOSPITAL!" he panicked, "YOU WERE DRUGGED AND YOU DIDN'T THINK OF GOING TO THE HOSPITAL BEFORE?"

"Hyung, it's a drug that has effects that last only an hour at most." I soothed, but he would have none of it. I refused to leave, knowing that if we ever set foot in a hospital together, the tabloids would go crazy. In the end, he had me dragged down to BigHit's medical-cube where the doctor let me off with just a pill to eradicate any extra side effects. The drug wasn't strong at all; it only made you tired and lethargic for a bit.

I couldn't imagine what it would've been like if he had roofied me. Rohypnol would have killed me, and boy I was not dying on the love of my life.

After I was cleared, I dragged him straight up to his studio, and yet again by chance, we passed by the TXT boys who cheered and whooped on seeing our entwined fingers.

Locking the door firmly behind us, I remembered something as I watched him lay down on his sofa.

"Hyung, why was the door not closed when I came tonight?" I asked, watching his expression intently. He didn't face me, still looking at the ceiling, "I know you like your studio to be shut and locked; hence the passcode, right?."

"And why the HELL does this floor have access to only ME?" I accused, half-amused but deeply intrigued, "I haven't even been here before!"

He only turneded in his make-shift bed, extending his arms as if calling me to him. Chuckling, I joined him on the sofa, covering him with a blanket before slipping into his arms and cuddling into his warm, soft, tiny body.

"I wanted nothing to stop you when you came back to me, you know?" he said, matter-of-factly. "If you ever decided to come, I wanted you to get here as soon as you could."

"Even if the door had been closed, the password was 301295." He shrugged, snuggling close, "You could easily guess that since ya know, I'm madly in love with you."

"My birthday-" I whispered, a small smile on my lips. "You planned it all out didn't you?"

"Not really, but yeah I did."

"But how in the world did you know I would ever come back?" I asked, "Didn't you ever once think that I was gone for good?"

"Never."

"You're my boy, Taehyung." he smiled, placing a soft kiss on my cheek before closing his eyes, "I always knew you'd come back to me in the end."

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so it happened...

after what seemed like 15 years of angst, they're finally together!

now I can finally write the tooth-rotting Taegi fluff you all want, hehe