Isabella blinked. Once. Twice. And wondered if Fenrys was so drunk his thoughts were confusing him, and the words leaving his lips were just a consequence of that confusion.

"What?" She dared a quick glance in Rowan's direction. The male was still, filled with tension even as he tried to play it cool by tapping his fingers on an unknown rhythm on the table.

His eyes were on Fenrys, though, and the murderous look in his eyes was impossible to conceal.

Fenrys was fully sobbing, now. Thick tears running down his face, lips and neck. Probably a lot of mucus mixed on it, too.

And Isabella had no idea what to do.

So, she tried again, leaning a little bit closer to the male across the table. "Fenrys," She called. "What do you mean?"

He hiccuped. "Rowan" Hiccup. "Said" Hiccup. "That you-" Hiccup. "Would leave"

She tried to contain the annoyance that arose in her when Gavriel started drunkenly laughing and Lorcan started playing with his empty glass.

"Why?"

He sneezed. "Why what?"

She hid one of her hands under her tigh to prevent her from sinking her nails on her own hand. It was a reflex act she was still trying to drop.

"Did Rowan tell you why I was leaving?" And she couldn't help but glance at Rowan. His cheeks were slightly flushed due to the alcohol, but apart from that, he did not look drunk.

Fenrys nodded, and accepted the offered tissue of Gavriel's to blow his nose.

Isabella waited patiently. Or, tried to.

"He said-" He was stopped by the appearance of a new figure.

A human woman stood close to their table. The neckline of her dress ran low, and she looked only a little bit less drunk than the males in Isabella's company.

"Hello," She purred.

Three sets of male eyes blinked. "Hi," Fenrys choked out.

Her smile was intensive and seductive. "Why are you crying?" She asked him, slowly, as she leaned to rest her forearms on their table. And allowing the males a better view of her barely hidden breasts.

Fenrys seemed to forget that he had been crying less than a minute ago, for a wide, teasing -and very inviting- smile spread across his face. He did not lean closer, though.

"Wouldn't you like to know?"

The woman blinked, feigning ignorance. "I would, actually" Her voice has turned low.

Isabella wondered if this is what foreplay looked like in real life. A second layer she decided that if it was, then real life was disappointing.

Fenrys chuckled, and the woman took that as her opportunity to persuade him to invite her to have a drink with him. And despite Isabella's uncomfortability, she had to admit that the woman was actually quite good at seducing. Especially being half-drunk.

So the two of them left to go to the bar, ordered two drinks, and went to a room in the inn before the bartender had even finished their beverages.

Before Isabella could begin questioning Rowan, Lorcan stood up and walked to whisper in the ear of another woman. She giggled, and they left to their own room.

Gavriel followed his friend's action swiftly, but multiplied it by two.

In the end, it was only her and him. Isabella and Rowan. Rowan and Isabella. The mortal girl and the immortal being. A girl from another reality and a male from a book.

She went straight to the point. "Why did you say that?"

He stared. "Why did I say what?"

"Why did you tell Fenrys I was leaving? Am I leaving?" And she hated herself for the fear that unintentionally manifested in her voice. She hid her other hand.

Rowan blinked. Slowly. Almost as if he were telling himself to do so. He licked his lips, and she had to pinch herself for traitorous eyes for straying there.

"Are you leaving?" Was all he asked.

She kicked his shin from under the table. He cursed, frowned, but did not complain.

"What is that supposed to mean?" She whisper-yelled.

"It means what you wish for it to mean. Do you want to leave? Are you leaving?"

"What?"

The hand with his fingers tapping on the table stopped, and turned into a fist. "Don't you want to leave?"

"Leave what?" She was so confused she could have screamed.

"Us-" He cleared his throat. "This town, this inn, this kingdom, world, I don't know"

She reared back. "What the fuck-?"

He closed his eyes. "Stop saying that. I'm being very direct here"

"You are anything but direct" She snapped.

Rowan narrowed his eyes on her. "I'm simply asking you a question, Isabella. I do not see why you need to act so confused when-"

"Act confused?" She was indignant. "I am confused and you are just sitting there, brooding and not saying that shit-"

"I'm not brooding!"

"Hell yeah, you are!"

"I'm not doing anything" He told her, defensively.

"Exactly!"

Rowan rubbed his temples. "I am confused"

"Welcome to the club"

"I'm too drunk for this" He started to stand up. "We can talk tomorrow and-"

She grabbed his forearm, and he froze in place. "Don't you dare leave. I'm not stupid. I know that if you leave now we will never talk about this"

Isabella knew this as well as she knew the palm of her scarred hand. She had studied all the male's personalities in the time she had been with them, and she had discovered that Rowan did not like to talk about things unless it was absolutely necessary. He was extremely skilled at evading conversations. Especially with her. And, for whatever reason, he did not want to speak about his words to Fenrys.

"We will talk tomorrow"

"I don't believe you"

"I promise"

"And what is your promise worth?" She spat, and she felt him flinch.

She opened her mouth, to apologize, the 'I'm sorry' ready on her lips; but she did not say a thing. She was confused. By him. By his words. His attitude. And she was confused about herself. About what she felt and her reactions. It all made her mad. It was too much. The warmth of his skin under her fingertips, the smell of his clean body, the shining of his eyes, the fast speed of her heartbeat, the sudden sweat forming in her back;

She retreated her hand from his arm, and looked down at the now almost empty table.

"We will talk tomorrow," He repeated. Calmly. Flatly.

She could only nod. She did not look at him leaving, but felt the emptiness where he had been seconds before.

If he also left for his room with a woman following him, Isabella did not know.

~

She went to bed.

She had a nightmare.

She woke up.

She dressed.

She had breakfast.

She could not look at Rowan.

She saw the bruise on Fenrys' eyes that had not been there the night before.

She noticed the tension between the two males.

She left the inn before anyone could talk to her.

She went to the trees of the town.

He found her anyway.

~

"Do you wish to talk now?" Rowan asked her.

She didn't need to open her eyes to know he was there. His presence was too noticeable for that. He was power and magic and never-ending time; and it was all impossible to ignore. Impossible not to feel.

"Yes," Isabella whispered.

He sat next to her. Their backs to the trunk of the tree, their sides aligned. But they did not touch. It was enough, regardless.

He sighed, and nodded. "Fenrys is...like a pup, in many ways. He is young-" She snorted at that, and he shook his head with a small smile playing on his lips. "And he gets very excited about things -and people- very easily"

"Are you telling me that he has no problem attaching himself to people?" She asked, dubious.

"Not at all. Fenrys is a child of war. He has trained all his life, and he has a tendency to do the opposite. It is hard for him to open himself to others, to allow himself to relish in their company as friends. Or more. But when he does...it's like a newborn puppy with its first toy"

Her nod was slow, partly disoriented. "Okay,"

"But he has grown attached to you. He has gotten used to your presence. He...Well, the night arrived in town he was telling us about showing you to some ice cream shop he thought you would love and-" He swallowed, and a sudden, soft wind erupted around them. It was Rowan's doing. "I told him not to get too excited -or attached- because I thought you would leave us. I just didn't want him to get hurt, I was trying to warm him"

Her eyes widened. "Why would you think I'd leave?"

He sighed, almost as if defeated. "Because I thought that once you knew about the war, about our involvement in it, you would want to leave. You just escaped from a battleship only to find yourself thrown into another. I thought you would want to escape and try to have a normal, quiet life. Or even try to return to your world"

Isabella laughed at his words. Throwing her head back and practically howling. She felt Rowan's surprised eyes on her. Watching her. And she shrugged the sensation off.

"I truly do not think I could have a normal life even if I tried"

He was staring intensely at her when he said. "Why not?"

"Because there are memories that do not go away, and memories that I cannot ignore" She whispered.

"I have those, too" His voice was as low as hers. He shrugged. "And I know the others do, too. Yet, I think I would like a normal life after..." He looked at her, then away. "The war" He finished.

"To wish and to be able to do are not the same thing"

"No. But to dream and to try are more important"

They had gotten closer with the passing of their conversation. Close enough that their arms were pressed to each other, and she could hear his breathing and feel his warmth.

Isabella looked away, and feigned a lightness she did not feel. "So you were trying to spare Fenrys the trauma of losing someone he has come to care about?" She joked.

Rowan's chuckle made her shiver. "I suppose so"

"That sounds like an unhealthy coping mechanism"

He laughed louder and stronger at that. "I think it may be"

"You are going to have to work on that if you want your normal life" She teased, and bumped her side to his in what she hoped was a friendly way.

"I will" And why did it sound like a promise?

"Alright"

His wind roared softly, and felt almost like a caress on her skin.

"I'm sorry. About yesterday. Fenrys was not supposed to say anything and I didn't think it would make you mad" His voice was low. Almost shy. And utterly honest.

She bumped into him again. Because it felt right. Because it didn't make her panic. Because she knew that even if she had an attack he would help her calm down. And because she felt something almost like friendship blooming between them. Brightly.

"I'm sorry for saying that about your promises. I was mad" And confused, but she was not going to admit it out loud.

"That's fine"

"We're fine" She told him, timidly.

"We are fine" He reassured her. Firmly.

Somehow the words felt like something stronger and deeper than that.

~

Rowan stood up and asked her what she had planned for the day.

She told him she had only planned to stay in the trees.

He asked her if she wanted some company.

She shook her head.

His smile was tight when he said "Alright"

She stopped him with a hand on her forearm.

She told him she would like to visit some shops.

She invited him to come along with him.

His smile was dazzling when he said "Of course"

~

Rowan took her to an ice cream shop called Benito. The walls were painted yellow, and it had small, rounded white tables inside and outside the shop.

He bought her an ice cream cone, and one for himself. They sat at a table outside the shop, close to the window.

She ate, and Rowan sat across from her. He was shooting her looks every now and then without saying a word. At some point, she grew tired. "What is it? Do I have ice cream on my face?"

He shook his head. "No,"

"Then...?"

"I can't believe your favorite ice cream flavor is mint," He said, quickly. Almost like a confession he hadn't meant to make.

She looked from her green dessert to the tattooed male in front of her. "I love mint" He arched an eyebrow. Isabella gasped. "Don't tell me you are one of those who hates mint flavor and criticizes those who love it"

"I'm not"

She smiled, "Liar,"

"I like mint" He told her, then finished, lower. "Just not on fucking ice cream"

"Aha!" She pointed at him. "I knew it"

He rolled his eyes. "How can you even like it? There are so many amazing flavors out there and-"

"Rowan,"

"What?"

"You are eating kumquat ice cream"

He looked at her defensively, "So?"

"So," She said, and leaned back in her chair, fighting another smile. "That is an old people's flavor"

He had the audacity to look offended. "Excuse me?"

She nodded, "You are excused" And before he could say something else, she added. "Since, you know, you are old"

He threw his head back and gazed at the sky as if praying for patience. Isabella laughed at his expression, and he smiled a little bit at that, too.

"I don't think it is as you claim" He continued, and licked his own dessert. Isabella willed herself to look into his eyes and not at his tongue. Or fangs.

"It is," She said, and snorted. "It was my dad's favorite-" She cut herself off before she could continue.

Something in her chest flared to life, and it was painful. Because of her imprisonment, she had not grieved the loss of her family as she could have if things had been different.

Rowan stared at her. Silent, and then. "I don't know my father's favorite flavor. Or food"

She fidgeted with a loose strain of her trousers. Her gaze was downcast. "No?"

"No," He said, simply. And if there was pain in the admission, Isabella did not notice it. "I was too young when he -they- died to remember"

"Right," She already knew that, and yet she had forgotten.

"Yes,"

Isabella could have said many things at that moment. She could say I'm sorry, she could say I understand, she ask does it still hurt or do you miss them.

Instead, she pursed her lips. "What do you remember of them?" She made sure to ask it slowly, and kindly, but not pitiful or pressuring.

He seemed surprised by her question. Rowan tilted his head to the side, and thought about it. "I remember my father walking me on his shoulders" He smiled at that, and she couldn't help but to do so, too. "I remember the way he smelled, though I have already forgotten the sound of his voice or how he truly looked"

Cautiously, she continued. "And your mother?"

"I remember that she used to sing me lullabies, and I still remember parts of the lyrics to some, but I cannot remember the sound of her voice, either. Only that it calmed me"

"They sound wonderful,"

"They were. The few memories I have of them are all good. Happy"

"That's even more wonderful"

Rowan nodded, almost distractedly. He shot her a look out of the corner of his eyes, and she already knew what he was trying to come up with the courage to voice.

"What do you remember of your parents?" His voice was soft, a caress as much as his wind had been. Perhaps even more.

The first memory that came to her mind was of her mother asking her to buy some vegetables because they had run out of them. "Go to the shop that is close to Paseo Ahumada, their products are cheaper" Isabella had complained, her mother had chided her, and his father had laughed. But Isabella had gone to the shop, and on her way back, bombs had been dropped. And then tears and pain and pain and pain.

But she willed herself to send that memory away, and instead thought of one of her favorite memories. "I remember my father kissing my mother while my sisters and I made gagging noises, and then my parents laughing and kissing each of our foreheads as 'punishment'"

Rowan's smile was sincere. Understanding. "How old were you?"

"Eight,"

He smiled wider at that, "Practically a baby"

She rolled her eyes. "Says the man who was already an old person in need of retirement by that time"

"I'm actually young, you know"

Isabella tilted her head to the side. "I thought Fenrys was young"

"He is, and even though I'm considered an adult, I'm still a young adult" He put a lot of emphasis on the word young.

"That's a book category, not simple words a three-hundred-year-old male can throw away"

Rowan blinked. "How do you know I'm over that age?"

Isabella looked away. "Because you look like it"

He snorted, "I don't look a day older than twenty six"

She was amused, "Maybe if you add a cero at the end"

"I stopped aging at that age, I know I don't look old"

"Keep saying that to yourself, buddy"

Now he was the one amused. "Buddy?" Isabella nodded, "Maybe I am too old for certain things" He murmured.

She frowned, "Too old to be called buddy?" He nodded with an exaggerated grimace on his face. "You may be old, but don't worry about it," She found him looking at her, and a malicious smile curved her lips as she added, "Buddy"

Rowan groaned and Isabella laughed. "I'm never speaking to you again"

She couldn't do anything against the smile on her face. "Liar,"

He sighed. "That's true"

"How old were you when they passed away?" She asked him a moment later. Because she did not know that, and she felt like the answer was important.

"Five,"

"That's...very young"

He shrugged. "I grew up surrounded by cousins and uncles and aunts. It wasn't bad, I was happy"

She nodded, "I know," She said, distractedly.

Rowan frowned. Then, "Oh, right. I had already told you that"

"It's not," She shook her head, and told herself that it was okay to speak about it. To share what she knew. "In the books...Sarah wrote that"

Rowan blinked. "Oh,"

"Yeah,"

"That was...personal"

She flinched, even though she was not to blame. "I'm sorry,"

"What for? It is personal, but everyone back at Doranelle knows this. It's fine"

"Because you are royalty?" She battled her eyelashes at him.

Rowan chuckled. "Yes, because of that. There's not much privacy when your first cousin is a Queen"

Then, he said. "I wish Sarah hadn't written those books, because it is my life and she had no right to share it with others without my consent but..." He laughed, and his tone was light. "I feel like you have a certain advantage over me. Because you know more about me than I know of you thanks to them"

Isabella looked away. "Think of it as a curse, I was robbed of the possibility of a first real impression"

He was silent for a minute before he spoke. "Don't tell Fenrys I asked but...how was I described? Handsome? Was I even a soldier in the books? Did I have my powers?"

Isabella laughed, and told him all -or almost, for there were things she wanted to keep for herself- about the famous Rowan Whitethorn, a book character.

~

They ate the rest of their dessert in a comfortable silence. By the time they decided to leave the shop to go back to the inn, Rowan stopped her with a quick hand on her shoulder.

"Could you please do me a favour?"

Isabella frowned, but still said. "Sure, what is it?"

"When Fenrys decides to bring you here, please act surprised and as if you had never tried Benito's ice creams before"

"Why?"

"Because this is the shop he was so excited to show you and I just beat him to it" He didn't look a bit apologetic for it.

~

"You shouldn't have punched him," Gavriel told him.

Rowan knew his friend was right, but that didn't mean he was going to admit it.

He shrugged, "I could have done worse, and you know it"

"But that doesn't change the fact that you shouldn't have punched Fenrys"

"I told him not to say anything, and what did he do? He went, got drunk, and spilled all the beans" Oh dear gods, had he just said spill the beans? Maybe Isabella was right and he was old.

He would never admit that, either.

"You know he didn't do it on purpose" Gavriel continued as Rowan got dressed.

His friend had burst into his room right after he had finished with his bath, and Gavriel seemed to have no intention of leaving until they were done speaking.

"Yet, he still did it"

Gavriel sighed, and Rowan focused on putting on his new shirt. He didn't care much for his appearance -because he knew he was attractive-, and it wasn't like he was trying to look good to impress anyone.

Just because they had spent the day together did not mean anything. Not to him, and certainly not to her.

"Are you listening to me?" The male demanded.

Rowan blinked. "Not really,"

"Fucking asshole" Rowan rolled his eyes at that. "I was telling you that Fenrys was acting like a sad puppy all day"

"So?"

"So, make up"

"Not yet,"

"He looked like someone had kicked a puppy. And he was the puppy!"

"You know Fenrys is dramatic"

"And you know he did not speak intentionally"

Rowan sighed. "Fine," He gritted out.

"Good,"

"Yeah,"

Silence fell as Rowan glanced at his new trousers. Fuck him, he was acting like a fourteen-year-old boy.

"Are those new clothes?" Gavriel asked.

"No," He said. Clipped.

"They look like,"

"They are not"

"There's nothing wrong with wearing new clothes, you certainly needed them, anyway"

"I didn't buy new clothes" He gritted out.

"When are you going to make up with Fenrys? Tonight?"

Glad for the change of topic, Rowan admitted. "Yes,"

"Great," Gavriel said, and then he almost yelled. "FENRYS, COME HERE"

Less than five seconds later, Rowan heard a knock on his door, and he recognized the scent of the male on the other side even before he opened it.

Fenrys stood in his doorway with his hands in front of him, and big, puppy eyes. He looked like a kid who had been reprimanded by his parents.

"Can I come in?" He was even using his 'please forgive me' voice.

Rowan nodded, and Fenrys strode inside. The two males stared at each other for what felt like minutes without saying a word.

They were interrupted by Gavriel, "Okay, so, now. Make up"

"Was this an ambush?" Rowan said from his place.

"Of course not," His oldest friend said. But by the way Fenrys was fidgeting with his hands, Rowan knew it had been an ambush indeed.

When no one else spoke, Gavriel sighed again. "Rowan, don't you have something to say to Boyo?" Silence. Then he turned to Fenrys. "Boyo, don't you have something to say to Rowan?"

Fenrys straightened up, and nodded. "Rowan, you are an idiot" Gavriel murmured a tired, ohmygod. "But...I know I should have been more careful. I know she is a sensitive topic for you and that you are trying to impress her and win her over-"

"I'm not trying that" He said through gritted teeth.

The male ignored him, "And I know I only caused problems, but I didn't do it on purpose. I swear. I actually think the two of you would make a good couple, and I know you are a bit jealous because Isabella and I are good friends-"

"I'm not jealous" He lied. Then, "And I wouldn't say the two of you are good friends just...friends. No. Acquaintances"

"-but i also understand you have a good point and that you are doing a good job. Especially now that you finally bought new clothes, it highlights your asscheeks, she surely will notice that"

Gavriel coughed as he tried not to laugh. And Rowan was thinking about how much he wanted to punch his friend in the face. Again.

"So, I'm just saying that I know I did wrong. And I'm sorry. Can we be friends again?"

Boyo looked at him expectantly. Hopeful. And Rowan sighed, and nodded. Fenrys smiled and opened his arms wide. "Then let's hug. You know, a manly friends' hug" He joked.

Rowan rolled his eyes but hugged his friend. And whispered, "I'm sorry, too. I'm trying to control it. Be patient with me. I'm going to be an unbearable bastard until I settle"

Fenrys patted his back. "Don't worry about it. I understand. Furthermore, you've always been an unbearable ass. So what's new?"

As they drew apart, an amused snort caught their attention.

Lorcan was standing on the doorway with his arms crossed over his chest, and an arched eyebrow on his face. "What is happening? Are you three having an orgy and I was not invited?"

"Do you want to be invited?" Fenrys played along, very amused.

The dark-haired male pointedly looked anywhere but at them as he answered. "No, I'm not attracted to any of you. But I'm hurt that you didn't think of me. Am I not handsome enough?"

Fenrys looked at him from head to toe. "You are not really my type, but if we weren't friends, I'd do you"

"Oh dear gods" Gavriel shook his head.

Lorcan nodded, as if satisfied. "Thank you, Boyo. If you weren't my friend and so annoying, I'd do you, too"

"Nice,"

Rowan walked past them to go downstairs, but Lorcan quickly matched his steps. His friend eyed him from head to toe. "Are those new clothes?"

He groaned, and decided not to answer.

"Those trousers make your ass look bigger, I think Isabella will notice that"

Rowan growled as Lorcan laughed.

~

In reality, Rowan did catch Isabella staring at his ass when he walked in. They all sat at a table and ordered their dinner. And he had, coincidentally, walked past Isa's seat as he took his place.

And, yes, he was pleased -very pleased- that she had taken a look at him. Perhaps even smug about it, if the bratty pure masculine smile he was fighting meant anything.

But.

But he knew; he knew it was not because of him, but rather the mating bond. He had seen before the way it affected her, even if she had no idea about it, the way the bond made her desire him as much as it made him desire her.

But.

But, he didn't want that. He was not sure what he wanted. Time. Free choices. To see how the future would unfold for him. And her.

But.

But, he resented it. The bond. The way it snapped into place before they could properly get to know each other. Before she could properly heal and live her young life at its fullest. He felt...he felt like he was to blame for the bond -even though the reasonable part of him knew he was not- and that every time he was close to her, every time he saw the desire for him she refused to acknowledge...He felt like he was no better than those who imprisoned her.

Because wasn't that what they did? They took her liberty to choose; and, in a way, so had the mating bond.

So, he.

He wanted her to have a choice. He wanted her to live and love and be free. Even if that was alone, or with someone that wasn't him. Even if that meant he would never get to experience the miracle of having a mate who wanted to be with him as much as he with her. Because it only happened once in a lifetime. And she was mortal.

So.

So, he would never tell her about it. Their bond. He would not try to seduce her, or do anything that may make her love him. Not unless she wanted it. Truly and utterly wanted it. Him. Rowan. For what he was, and not for the bond making her need his body.

She deserved it. And so did he. Liberty and options.

Yes, yes, they did.

And, he. He felt dirty. A monster, almost, for being her mate and make her sexually desire him when she had just escaped from being psychologically raped countless times.

He felt guilty. Undeserving. And he wished he could turn the mating bond off just to see how things could be for them -together and as separate people- if it wasn't there.

If she were free. And healing. And happy. And he wasn't another person taking that from him.

So when Fenrys asked her if she was leaving, and she responded that she had no intention of doing so unless they wanted her to, he told himself not to feel anything.

~

The truth was Isabella had nowhere to go. She had read about this world, but she did not know it. She did not know anyone -apart from the four males- here, and she had no idea about how education was important, or how she would find a job.

So, of course, she would stay with them. Because they had thought her a spy, but they had still saved her life. And because she liked them. Only a little bit. 

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - A/N- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

In order to celebrate hitting 1k reads, I decided to post three chapters all in one go (which literally NEVER happens so, yeah)

Anyway, this three chapters are dedicated to @theifden_thank you for always sharing your brilliant ideas with me and being an amazing friend :)

Also, there may be mistakes in the whole story bc english is not my first language but i hope you enjoy!