This chapter is dedicated to toxicity1o1
Thanks so much for giving this book a chance.

Unedited chapter🙁

*

"It feels like I've not been in school for ages. I fuckin' miss this place! I'd never imagined saying that, but it's true!" Kelly screeched on our way to school.

Ivy volunteered to drive, Kelly was seating beside her while I tried to get comfortable in the backseat.

"And Roxie's in our school now, I'm so excited to meet her too. All my friends too," she continued, that's how it had been since the beginning of the car ride.

The rest of the car ride was quiet apart from Kelly's rambling. I had told Ivy about what happened on Friday night but I didn't know if it was the cause of her sudden quietness but it was the cause of mine.

I was so indescisive, so confused.

One part of me was getting soft enough to release all the grudge I held against Cheryl but I didn't want to.

She hurt me badly, I didn't just want to forget about all of that!

And Roxie too, acting all strange, at one point, she's completely harsh, cold and care-free about others and at another point, she's so caring and crying her eyes out.

We got to school and we got down immediately so Ivy will head to her school in time too.

"Don't overstress yourself, okay?" She said to Kelly who nodded like she was a 2 year old before looking towards me.

"And that goes for you too."

"Yeah...sure," I replied.

We exchanged waves of goodbyes and she zoomed off faster than the speed of light.

Ivy and her driving speed is something else.

We walked inside and Kelly walked over to where her friends were while I headed straight to class.

Some people were staring at me with every step I took and I know that it had to do with what happened on Friday.

I entered the classroom and noticed Roxie already sitting on her seat, staring at a book on her desk but I could tell that her mind was somewhere far away.

It was a bit weird because Roxie doesn't come to class early. She gets to school and hangs out in the hallway with a few friends and gets to class when the bell rings or sometimes when the first period lesson had already gone halfway.

I made my way to my own seat which was beside hers and my presence snapped her back to reality.

"Hey, anything wrong?" I asked.

"No..no, just trying to read...that's all," she replied faintly.

"Dude...the book is up side down," I argued.

"Oh," she said suprisingly, looking down to the book, just to find out it was upright.

"It's not true," she retorted.

"Yeah...but it shows that you weren't even reading it," I argued.

"Okay...fine, right. I wasn't."

"Then, tell me what the problem is," I persisted.

"I was just thinking a few things over," she started.

"Like what?"

She took a deep breath and looked at me.

"Stella...everything I do in this life, I do it for the people I genuinely care about," she said and I just nodded in reply even if whatever she's saying or trying to say was still abstract to me.

"That night, I...I didn't want to help Cheryl at first. I feel bad for that now. I felt like she deserved it, you'd told me what she did to you and I also witness how horrible she could be. I..I thought that would be a payback, a taste of her own medicine, I thought that could make you really happy, it would even things out and make things fair and equal between the both of you," she continued and I stayed still quiet,waiting for her to pour out everything she wanted to say.

"But then, another reason I couldn't go in there, was because I was scared. I didn't want to face it anymore. A man did horrible things to my sister, I was a hidden witness to it but I couldn't do anything about it, I was young and weak and you know what, that kind of scene just brings back a feeling of deja vu, a memory I'd tried to push away. It weakens me in a way I don't understand. I just couldn't take it." She said.

A tear rolled down her cheek.

A tear. It was rare in Roxie's eyes.

"That should have been a better more reason why you would have wanted to help her, so that nobody else would have to go through what your sister was forced to go through," I replied calmly.

"I know right, but it doesn't, it just makes me want to run far away from it. It scares me, I can't handle it! It makes me loose control. It's not like I want it to, it just happens. I don't even know if anyone can get it....can understand me because I can't fully understand it myself," she continued before wiping the tears off her cheek.

"You know what, let's not just talk about it," she said before I pulled her in for a hug.

"It doesn't matter, at least you faced your fear and you chose to help her. It's okay," I said while she was still in my arms.

We broke the hug after a few minutes and stood up from her seat.

"Thanks B, I need to go pee right now," she said before leaving.

Immediately, she left, I noticed someone coming towards me, like she'd been waiting for me to be alone.

Cheryl.

She looked better than last time I saw her. Her bruises were a bit faded and she looked healthier.

I acted like I didn't see her coming and started rummaging for nothing in my bag.

I still wasn't ready to face her.

I wasn't looking but through her slow footsteps, I could tell she was close.

"Thank you" she said, her voice so faint that I was surprised that I could hear it.

I looked up and she was already standing in front of my table.

"Thank you for helping me back there...I...I don't know...wh...what would have happened if you didn't show up..I don't know, if I'll be able to stand here right now if you weren't there," she said slowly and faintly, her voice breaking at some intervals.

I was taken aback when she got down on her knees.

"Please forgive me."

Forgive.

I don't know if I'd expect that.

Maybe I did, and I was too afraid that I was going to just do it when she asks for it.

Why should I? She'd hurt me so damn much.

'You'd also hurt her too.'

But...

'Without her, you would have still been a fear obsessed bitch who doesn't care about anyone else but your damn self.'

"I know I'd been wrong in so many ways, but I'm so sorry. I let my anger take over me that I did horrible things to not just you, but others too," she continued.

I remained quiet, looking at every other place but her.

"Stella..I--"

"I don't want to talk about this please," I interrupted, finally looking at her in the eye.

"I just want to--"

"Cheryl...please...just leave," I said trying myself to remain calm.

It was too much for me, I might have been wrong to her at first but it still hurts....deeply.

"Fine..I...I'll leave. I just hope things will get better, and I'll do anything just to show you how sincerely sorry I am" she said, standing up from her knees and wiping her watery eyes.

She stood there for about a minute more before finally leaving and that was the cue for my inbuilt emotions to enfold.

I placed my head on my locker and let my tears flow.

*

"What should we get for lunch because there's so much on my mind."

"Do you spend all the money you work for on food?" I asked her, packing up my stuffs from my desk.

"Probably," Roxie replied.

"But not exactly," she completed and I rolled my eyes at her.

Before I could say another word, I noticed a presence getting closer. Lan was walking towards us.

Or towards Roxie.

Seeing Lan reminded me that his bestfriend was nowhere to be found since the beginning of the day.

I'd almost forgotten Lan and Roxie had something to do with each other and I just needed to be reminded again.

It's so weird, and disturbing. Seeing the both of them together makes me feel uncomfortable. It irritates me, he irritates me and maybe Roxie has started too also.

At least, I recall telling her about Lan and what he did to me, then why would she choose to have something to do with him right in my face.

Plus, Roxie always emphasises the fact that she doesn't want anything to do with guys or men in general....So why?

She turned towards his direction as he walked towards us.

When he was already infront of Roxie's table, he shot out a signature smirk and I chose to look away.

"It's food time," he said with a cheerful tone.

"Ofcourse,I'm really hungry right now" Roxie replied.

"Okay then, lunch's on me."

"Ouu, that's tempting, what if I want to buy the whole cafeteria," she replied teasingly.

I wasn't watching though, just eavesdropping and absent-mindedly flipping through a book.

"I love girls that think like that unlike those that watch their diet like they are going to walk on the runway or something," he replied.

Why do I feel so attacked.

Yeah. Because I am being attacked. How dare he?

"Fine then, give me a sec to clear my desk."

"Sure, babe, you've got all the time you need," he replied.

Babe? The fuck! They're not even dating yet?

"I was thinking, what if we go out right now...to somewhere else, outside the walls of this school, huh?" He asked.

I looked at Roxie and she smiled and nodded in response to his question.

Why is this so complicated?

I didn't want to be a hinder to her happiness but I felt so uneasy about this.

"I'll be waiting in the car," he said and walked out without even sparing a glance at me.

Roxie packed her things and was about to leave but I held her back, standing up also so that we would be able to look at each other face to face.

"Don't do this, Lan is pure bad news. He's just doing all of this to lure you and get what he wants. Please listen to me. I really care about you and I can't let this happen," I started.

"I'm not saying this because of what happened between the both of us but because I care about you and I don't want you to be hurt," I continued, patiently waiting for a reply or maybe an emotion.

"Stella...just trust me."

Those were the only words that escaped her lips before she turned around and headed towards the class exit.

~~~~~