Resigned: having accepted something unpleasant that one cannot do anything about.

///

"She didn't even come back last night." I wrinkled my nose and pushed away my juice box, losing my appetite at the thought.

"Let's not bother with her right now," Davina murmured empathetically, "You should open that letter Av."

"A part of me feels guilty." I murmured, pushing my fork around the macaroni that had barely been touched.

"But you shouldn't!" Davina insisted, "Let's face it, she's not there for you half of your life, so opening the information without her doesn't exactly make a difference."

"You're right," I sighed, "But they do contain her results too."

The both of us eyed the plain brown envelope warily, as if it were a ticking time bomb. Truthfully, it did resemble that exact object. The moment I read the words in the letter, there was a possibility of my time beginning to slowly drip away.

Our silence was shattered by a cheerful voice, "Ever noticed how you both have Av in your name? You could be the Av twins."

Davis' weight made the bench creak as we both glared to the boy beside me, who confidently smiled from a distance above me.

How could he always be happy? It was just like the phoney table of other people who he was surrounded by.

He gestured to my plate of full food, "Can I?"

I rolled my eyes and pushed the macaroni serving to him, it wasn't like he was going to gain weight; the guy knew how to be athletic.

Davina's expression remained disgusted at the vision of him taking a bite of my food, it was almost comedic.

I stifled a laugh as we met eyes, then reached to my side to take the letter that was dangerously close to Davis.

Too late.

"Ooh, juicy." He teasingly pulled the information from me, not realising that the crucial words were actually serious.

"Not this one." I froze, attempting to snatch it from him.

"Let me have a peek!" Davis jokingly turned his large back to me.

I groaned and punched his back, "Please don't! Davis! Give it back!"

It was like a myth for me to raise my voice, but now the world around me had disappeared. He smiled unknowingly to himself, as if it were another game.

I struggled to grab the crisp white paper he had torn out from it's packaging, but by the time I'd rightfully stolen custody of the sheet...it was too late.

There wasn't a chance to bother reading what the words decoded, because his stunned expression gave it all away as he murmured, "Shit."

Ignoring Davina's arm that had comfortingly wrapped around me, I absorbed the words.

Mrs Lockhart.

I am aware that you specifically asked for a letter, rather than a separate meeting due to your heavy schedule. I have been your family doctor throughout years now, thus I feel my own obligations to write this.

It is always with a heavy heart that we deliver some aspects of bad news, but our institution hopes that each person will be able to distinguish a silver lining to unfortunate events.

The tests taken a fortnight ago on the 23rd of March have proven to confirm that indeed, you are a carrier of the CFTR gene mutation.

In regards to your daughters' blood tests, it is essential that you contact me as soon as possible. A priority appointment will be available due to the conformational results from her test. Along with Ava, please bring any of her prior medical records as this will be essential through the diagnosis of Cystic Fibrosis.

I gulped as a hurricane of overwhelming emotions whipped through my mind, anger pulsing through my veins. The moment my head was up and my coordination had come back to life, his eyes were the cause of my raised a hand.

The palm of my freezing cold hand made contact with Davis's sharp jawline as I slapped the side of his face, "How dare you read that before me? Do you not know what fucking privacy is? Not everything is a joke!"

Not bothering for a reaction, I spun on my heels and ignored the silence that wrapped itself through the canteen. My laced boots stomped through the squeaky floor as my body manoeuvred itself to an isolated area.

I was shaking like a tree that had been attacked by a ruthless wind, and by the time I'd locked my soul in a bathroom stool, I lost it all.

The stiff paper in my hands crumbled against my fists as I gasped, breathing for a shot of air before breaking into bursts of emotions.

I choked on the misery that had been summoned, my face was buried in my pair of hands like curtains that hid the world from destruction. As the tears cascaded down me and soaked the corners of my shirt collar, I slowly took a consolidating breath.

It was useless, the knot was firmly stuck in my throat and refused to be tugged out. Like a forlorn lump, it began to drag me down.

Why was this happening? There had to be a reason.

The moment Dad left, my life had plummeted like broken statistics and reached a deep pit. I didn't think I could sink further, but my journey was full of cruel surprises.

Was I overreacting though? There were treatments and measures to be taken for the disease, it was incurable but death wasn't guaranteed.

My mind was already worryingly infected, I'd drowned so deep that it was useless trying to identify my current state. Was my life about to become modified?

"Av?" I heard Davina's voice softly call from the other side of the cubicle.

I paused for a moment, contemplating if my weakness was really something that should be projected. Then again, I have nothing else to lose now.

I stood up wearily, hearing my bones crack at the shift of movement. Slowly and uncertainly I pulled my hands away from my face, uncovering my distraught face.

No sooner than it was exposed, I had hidden my face back into her; sobbing like a confused child.

"Oh Ava," She murmured, wrapping her arms around me as I clung onto her with my last shreds of strength, "Let's sort you out."

"I'm just so sick of this shit." I whispered, meeting her eyes.

"I know," Davina eased me off from her and then looked at me crestfallen, "It's not fair, but there's not much we can do to change the situation. We can only make the most of it."

"There isn't a silver lining." I rubbed the sunken flesh under my eyes.

"You keep telling yourself that," She passed me a soft tissue, "But it's that ideology that has dragged you down so much."

I bit my lip, there wasn't an argument against that.

Sensing my hesitant state, she pulled on my arm, "Let's get out of here, the both of us aren't failing Biology anyway."

Gladly, I allowed Davina to guide me through the blurred crowds whom I ignored; her navigation providing support.

Bursting into our year head's room, my best friend confidently announced to the middle-aged man, "She's on her period, I've got an appointment so I'll drop her home and make sure she makes it there safely."

Looking like a deer caught in headlights, he awkwardly blinked, "R-right. Okay, let me write a note for the office. I need confirmation of your appointment too."

Davina always had a handy note, and she passed the teacher a written excuse. In a swift motion, the yellow note was passed to my hand along with a sympathetic glance, "Get well soon."

"She will," Davina patted my head, "It lasts around a week."

"Oh lord," I muttered, dragging her out of the room and shoving her out of hearing distance before the girl burst into a chuckle.

"His face!" She poked my arm with a smirk, "That was hilarious."

I shook my head with a smile, "You are one of a kind."

"Leave it to us," Davina motioned to both of us, "Us girls can switch between attitudes like we supposedly switch between outfits".

"You said it." I sighed as the two of us headed to the office.

Whilst we waited for a student in front of us to take a call, I fumbled with my fingers nervously again.

How was I meant to tell mum? She would kill me after realising that I'd opened it without her permission.

All this time I'd been so busy thoughts that I'd neglected my body. My throat suddenly clenched as my breathing withered, a large cough emitted through my system as that lump returned again.

My loud sound attracted unwanted attention, just as feared. Turning away from the faces, I held a hand to my chest and breathed in deeply, trying to clean out what felt like a mucus build-up.

The girl that had been talking to the receptionist skipped away, sending me a pitiful stare and then disappearing into the crowd.

Davina passed the note under the glass window that worked as a barrier and as she explained the situated lie again, my eyes roamed through all the crowds of students who were breathing normally.

"Ava!"

I shrunk back at his voice, sick of hearing the words that were always being spurted out. By the time Davis' figure was close enough to make me flinch, Davina had finished talking and turned back to see the boy.

"Don't you think you've done enough?" She threw her arms onto her hips accusingly and glared at him like a predator hunting down prey.

"I know, I know," He held out a hand to ease her off and then faced me with a concerned expression, "Ava, I'm really sorry."

For a second I was stunned with the sincerity that dripped through his voice, like holy water. Then, before I had a chance to provide a response, my body quivered and exerted another forceful cough. My hand managed to cover my mouth just on time, but the pain that seared through my chest was something I couldn't disguise.

Recovering, I met Davis's solemn eyes again and murmured, "I'm glad I finally got to hit you."

Davina snorted in amusement and he bit his lip guiltily, "You can hit me again if you want."

I sighed and shook my head as he scratched the back of his neck, "Don't treat me differently just because of what you know," He was eyeing me curiously now, "I'm still Ava Lockhart."

Our eyes read each other for a brief moment, irises scanning their distinct patterns and slightly dilating.

"Roger!" His voice broke suddenly and Davis moved his hand to his head, sending me a grin, "I got you, Avacado Lockhart."

~

"There are so many things. Mucus thinning, mucus reducing, cough suppressors, antibiotics for chest infections," Davina bit into a prawn cracker and frowned, her reading glasses perched on her nose and made her look like a librarian who'd had just about enough of rampaging kids.

"And then there are also airway clearance techniques," I scanned my phone and took a painful bite of what should have been amazing fried rice, "Dina, I don't think I'm going to be able to do the physical parts of this."

"Dina?" She tilted her head questioningly.

"Dav-ina, Dina," I took a swallow of cold water, hoping to clear my airway, "It fits."

"Sure," She chuckled, "Anyway, swimming?"

"No," I sternly shook my head, "That's the worst of them all."

In all honestly, the last few years of sports had become a horrible boundary for me. My insecurities were at their climax when it came to freely being active, I hated being surrounded by other people. When Dad left I originally took my feelings out with Baseball, Tennis and Badminton. But now, the scars around my body had slowed me down to the point where I eventually hated even stepping out in the expected attire.

"Running should be okay," She pointed out encouragingly, "And you know what, let it go Ava. You're doing this for you."

"Huh?" I lifted my head, holding a slice of prawn toast in my mouth and absorbing the fishy taste.

"Flaunt those marks, so what if anybody sees? This is your time to get rid of the anxious thoughts, instead you should be building a healthier lifestyle."

"But..." I trailed off hesitantly, the taste in my mouth grew bitter.

"I don't want to see anymore of those scars Ava," Dina moved the laptop from her and met my eyes with a genuine expression, "Please, don't put your body through any more difficulties, it's already suffering enough. Do it for me."

I gulped, and when I failed to respond she pushed on, "If you can't do it for yourself, do it for me Ava."

Holding out her hand, she brought it towards me like a royal request. I eyed her hand suspiciously for a mere amount of seconds, then whispered, "My hands are oily, but here I go."

My fingers uncoiled and as if I was taking a step into blinding light, my hand travelled the distance span to shake Davina's.

"Deal."

The both of us broke out into smiles of satisfaction and Dina clapped her hands together, "Whenever you feel like it's getting too much, remember my face. Heck, I can even frame it for you if you need."

Chuckling, I shook my head, "No worries, if it comes to that extent then I'll use one of my many screenshots."

The clicking sound of our house door sent an eerie end to our conversation, as the two of us stiffened.

Cautiously, I scooted closer to Dina and the two of us lifted our heads to meet a pair of eyes that had an unmasked etch of regret protruding through them.

"Mum?"