🍁"And If Love Be Madness,
Say I Never Find Sanity Again"🍁

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Chapter 58 - I Love You!!

Kristein's P.O.V

Shanaya slapped me, kicked me to death with her tiny hand and later, hugged me like her life is dependent on me. God, she's just death to me. I never knew she's such the coward of the year, else I wouldn't have pranked her. Any sane human can handle a limit of fear but Shanaya is just a gone case.

Her slap and beating don't affect me but those tears in her eyes just pierced me right inside my chest. I couldn't resist the urge to protect her and hold her. I hugged her and she hugged me back. I felt so damn good holding her this close to me. I know I'm not being myself lately when I'm around Shanaya. For sure, I like her but I am feeling quite odd in my stomach when she's around.

We were lost as a result of my prank and now we're walking in this 'Oh so haunted forest' as tagged by Shanaya. She's worse than kids. Knowing that this small tweety doesn't have guts at all, make me even more protective for her.

Sighs!!

I agree that I can be a jerk sometimes. But now Shanaya has tagged me as a monster permanently and I can't even question her because I did wrong to her. She has all the rights to accuse me. Although, I was messing with her, still she does lack the sportsman ship.

Silly girl!!

I was walking ahead very well aware of the fact that she's following me. I turned around to see her and she just frowned at me every time, I flash my torchlight on her face to tease her. I felt good. This is the first time we'll be spending the night together.

Nights can't be better than this!!

After moving here and there for ten minutes, we found a relatively dry and clean place to settle. I sat down along the side of the tree and gestured Shanaya to sit next to me by patting the place next to me.

"Aren't you going to do anything?", She asked folding the hands across her chest. I raised my eyebrows.

"I'm not a Tarzan. What are you expecting me to do?", I asked.

"Yes, I'm very well aware of the fact that you're monster who can talk to witches and ghosts only", she replied and I rolled my eyes.

She started again!!

Shaking her head, she placed her bag next to the tree and started moving the torch here and there. She was touching the tree and was looking on the ground as if searching something.

"Could you please be useful to me once? Help me get dry woods", she said and I sighed.

"What does she mean by useful? Am I useless or something?", I muttered to myself.

Keeping the blanket next to her bag, I got up and walked towards her. "What will you do with the woods? Fire them with pebbles or something?", I asked.

"Stop talking and help me. I don't want to die out of the cold. Having you is enough to handle already", she said and I just shook my head. She's really getting on my nerves. Just because I'm not saying anything, she's taking advantage of this.

"Where will I find dry woods? They all must be wet because of the fog", I reasoned out. She stopped her scanning procedure and gave me all her attention.

"Look out for some dead or fallen tree. You'll get dry wood sticks near the trunk. Make sure to look for some dry leaves too", she said looking right into my eyes. I was flabbergasted. How can she be such an expert?

"How do you know so much?", I asked.

"You must be well informed about the place you're going and what problems you might suffer from. That's the first rule before going on any trip. Don't you know this much? You sure you're the CEO of a company", Shanaya said and it hurts me. Whatever she said was hard for me to swallow because it was a bitter reality.

My ego is hurt!!

"I never thought about being lost in a forest", I reasoned out.

"I can think of all bad thing when I'm with you", she said and then resumed her searching process. Swallowing the guilt, I started helping her. She wasn't supposed to be doing this. It's my job to make her feel protected and act maturely. Despite being scared of this place, shanaya is using her presence of mind. I'm actually feeling useless right now.

After a few good minutes of searching, we managed to pile up a good amount of sticks, papers, leaves and anything which could be used for making a bone fire. We both settled down near the tree and Shanaya picked up her bag. One by one she started taking out stuff from her bag and it seems like a magical bag.

Her bag looked like a Doraemon's pouch to me today!!

She took out a matchbox and light a fire in the paper. She placed it next to the rack of sticks, we made a few minutes ago and the dark place lit up with the light of the fire. I felt warm and safe all of a sudden. I couldn't take my eyes off her. She is just so smart and responsible.

She took out a thermos from her bag and also took out two disposable glasses from it. I couldn't hold my smile when she looked at me holding her Thermos.

She and her love for coffee. I'm officially jealous!!

"You managed to bring coffee too. Why am I not surprised?", I asked amused by her and she smiled at me sheepishly.

"Do you want some?", She asked. I nodded. Pouring a glass of coffee, she handed it to me. I took it from her. As soon as I hold it, my hands were warm. I mentally thanked her.

She poured her glass and sipped it. I was proud of Shanaya so much today. She actually is taking care of me when I'm supposed to do that. She's really special.

But she can't say the same for you, said my mind.

She covered herself with the blanket and looked in front at the infinity. I saw how her small baby face was glowing in the fire light. Her eyes had a hint of happiness, her small cute nose over that innocent face and those pink lips of hers who turned into a small curve as she sipped her coffee, were driving me crazy. I wonder how her lips will taste like?

Can I kiss her?, I thought!!

As soon as this thought crossed my mind, Shanaya looked at me. My heart skipped its beat. I immediately looked away and my breath was stuck inside my throat. I was flustered. Did I think out loud? I sealed my lips with the coffee glass. I didn't dare to look at her. What the hell is wrong with me?

Get a grip, Kristein. Now is not the right time to think about these kinds of stuff.

"Do you want to say something?", She asked. I looked at her. She was frowning.

Even her frown is cute, My heart said.

Oh my god. Shut up, my mind yelled.

"Yeah. I'm sorry for causing trouble to you", I found myself talking. Am I apologising? Why? I'm not being me today.

"It's really ok. It's not totally your fault. I'm just not brave at all", she chuckled and I smiled.

"Thanks for the coffee", I said.

"You're welcome", she said.

Wow, finally she's giving me a genuine reply.

"How're you feeling?", I asked and the second later cursed myself. What stupid question did you ask? You're such a fool.

She gave me a raised eyebrows look and I passed her a sheepish smile. She shrugged her shoulders and said, "This is not that bad at all. I mean this is one hell of an experience in itself".

"Yeah. A beautiful experience", I said as I looked at her. She gave me a 'You are weird' smile. I looked away and enjoyed coffee.

Who would have thought that I and Shanaya will be sitting this close to each other and having a nice conversation over coffee? Being lost is not at all that bad too.

"Anyways. I'll miss my comfy bed tonight", she said.

"Our friends must be worried about us", I said not wanting to stop the conversation.

"I know right", she said as she sighed. Placing her empty glass on one side, she folded her knees up to her chest. She folded her hand across her knees and rested her chin on it. I wanted to hug her and kiss the hell out of her there and then.

Damn her!!

"Daniel will be worried the most", she said looking in the infinity. I stared at her for a few seconds and then looked away.

I'm sitting here with her and she's still thinking about Dan. She still has feelings for him. I felt angry and suffocated all of a sudden. She never liked me. I know that. Why am I being affected by whom she like? I can't control her mind and heart.

You're jealous, a faint voice echoed inside me!!

I'm not. Just go away.

"You still care a lot about Dan. Don't you?", I asked.

"Yeah. I do. He's special to me", she said without even thinking twice.

"Oh", was I could manage to say. I crumbled the empty glass in my hand and threw it away in anger.

An uncomfortable silence regained between us. I didn't feel like talking to her. I have nothing to say to her. She didn't say anything too. I closed my eyes trying to calm myself. After a few minutes of silence, she breaks the silence.

"You don't need to worry about Aaliya. I liked Dan and I've moved on in my life a long time ago. But I can't stop liking or admiring him. He's the perfect example of a perfect boy any girl wants in her life. But today, I consider him as a good friend of mine only and you do like your friends. Don't you?", She said and I looked at her. She passed me a smile and I smiled back.

I wish one day I could hold that special place in your heart which Dan manages to make.

"I know. I trust you", I said and she smiled amusingly.

"I never asked you for your trust", she said. I shrugged my shoulders.

"I just wanted to let you know", I replied but she kept staring at me. I was getting nervous by her stare. Screw yourself, Kris. You're being intimidated by a girl.

"Thanks", she said as she smiled. My eyes rested on her lips and the thought of kissing her intensified.

Dammit!!

I shivered as a cold breeze passed across my jacket. I hugged myself and scooted closer to the bonfire to get some warmth.

"If you want we can share the blanket", I heard Shan saying. I immediately looked at her. She was looking at me with blank expressions.

Sharing a blanket? It means I'll get to touch her, hug her, feel her and if I'll turn lucky, I might get the chance to kiss her. A silly smile flashed across my face as I looked away. I saw her narrowing her eyes at me.

"Why are you smiling? Don't even go there", Shan warned me and I chuckled.

Allow me!!

"I'm not going anywhere, tweety. I was thinking about my safety", I said and she didn't buy it.

"Your charm doesn't affect me", she said as I moved closer to her. She holds one end of the blanket and passed the other over my shoulder.

"Don't challenge my charm and masculinity, shanaya", I said and she scoffed. I leaned next to her ear.

"If I want you won't be able to resist me", I whispered in her ears. I saw a blush creeping over her face. I smirked. Yep, I affect her somewhere.

Score!!

"Stop living in your dreams. Snap out already", she said and I just shook my head.

Silly girl.

I tried to adjust myself in the blanket but Shan wasn't helping. She wanted to share the blanket but she still wants me to stay at a safe distance from her. Annoyed, I removed the blanket off my shoulder.

"You know what? You keep the blanket", I said.

"Why? Aren't you cold?", She asked.

"I'm but you're not helping Shan. You can't keep distance if we're sharing this blanket", I said and she pouted.

"Ok. I get your point", saying so, she moved closer to me. She extended her hand holding the corner of the blanket and encircled it around my neck. My body started reacting differently with this close proximity with her. She shifted more close to me. She placed her head over my shoulder. As a reflex, my hand immediately encircled her around her waist and I pulled her more close to me. She gaped at this sudden action. She looked up and I looked down. Our eyes met. My eyes travelled from those brown pair of eyes to those pink lips, I'm dying to savour. I was inches away from her face.

I want to kiss her so badly!!

Shan immediately looked away as she rested her head on my chest. We end up cuddling each other. I closed my eyes as she encircled her hands around my waist. Her touch just is death to me. I didn't speak. I didn't open my eyes. Being this close to her, enjoying the warmth of her body and the amazing feeling of touching her was too much to ask for.

This is Paradise.

My rapid beating heart and the shallow breath came at ease. I felt contended. No, I don't want to leave this place ever. I don't want to let her go. I can't be more sure. The silence was a treat to my ears. It was so comforting.

"Kristein. Can I ask you something?", Shan asked. Why did she speak?

"Hmm", I responded with my eyes closed. I'm already trying hard to keep my hands to myself when she's this close to me. If I'll look at her, I might lose my self-control.

"Did you try to look out for Emily after our engagement?", She asked. I opened my eyes and saw her looking up at me.

Why is she so adorable?

"No. I didn't. Why do you ask?", I asked surprised by her question. She frowned listening to my answer and pouted too.

Ok. She's officially the cutest human being alive!!

"What do you mean by NO? A girl rejected you by on your engagement day and you're not going to do anything about you. Are you kidding me?", She asked. She sat up facing me. I felt this sudden urge to hug her back.

I want to cuddle!!

I frowned and left a deep sigh. Is she for real? In this beautiful romantic moment, she wanted to discuss with me about Emily. How many people are there in her mind?

"I have no complaints. She is a free human being. She has her own rights. She can live the way she wants to live. Besides, I'm engaged to you now. You is all that matter to me the most", I told her. I hope she takes the hint that I have feelings for her.

"So, you're not sad about being engaged to me? You don't regret your decision", she asked.

"Not at all", I said.

"Why?", She asked softly.

"Because I like you", I said finally mustering all the courage.

"You liked Emily too. Will you be okay if I too ran away? Will you also not look out for me and settle with someone else?", She asked and I looked at her dumbfounded. Where are these crazy thoughts coming in her mind?

I've already spent three years of my life thinking about this one girl with a brown pair of eyes sitting in front of me. I don't even remember a single day her thought hasn't passed across my mind. And now when I'm this close to her, now when we've memories, we've a name to our relationship and when I've developed strong feelings for her, the mere thought of losing her again just shook me to the very core.

"What do you want Shan?", I asked annoyed by her. I'm not at all ready to let her go.

"Answer my question. Will, you let me elope?", She asked.

Can I? Can I live without her? Can I think about spending the rest of my life with someone else? Haven't I thought about it enough? I can't imagine living like those past three years thinking about her and wanting to have a conversation with her. I glanced at her. She was boring her curious gaze onto me expecting me to give her the answer. I closed my eyes.

The answer I've been running from so long came back and bite me this time. I just can't think about letting her walk away. This is too much to ask for. I want to keep her next to me for the rest of my life.

"No I will not let you go", I replied.

"Why?", She asked. I just started at her with my lips sealed. My heart responded to her question this time.

Because I Love You!!

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Aana.