"Can you believe that mom actually let us have our own mundane New Year's party? Like.....who is she and what has she done to our mother?!"

It was New Year's Eve and Alec found himself sitting in Jace's living room while Isabelle was making her infamous pizza dip for the party later that evening. It was a miracle that their mother let them have their own party. He couldn't believe it either. His mom wasn't one to let them throw such a mundane custom. It almost made him uncomfortable being here in the kitchen.

"Where's Jace?" Alec asked.

"Out getting food and stuff with Clary. They should be back soon-hey, is Magnus coming? I thought you would've asked him to come to the party by now," Isabelle popped a cracker into her mouth.

No, he hadn't thought about asking Magnus to the party. He was so wrapped up in thinking about other things that he didn't even have time to ask about the party. "No. I didn't ask. Sorry."

"Don't apologize to me. No need. Just text Magnus and ask him to drop by if he's not busy. And don't forget to give him the time if he says yes."

So that's exactly what Alec did. Taking out his phone, he sent Magnus a quick text asking if he wanted to come over to the institute for a little New Year's get together. The response was almost instant.

Yes.

Alec smiled down at his phone before looking up and sighing happily. He didn't even notice his sister smirking at him from the kitchen. He was just too happy to notice anything.

"Magnus said he'll be here soon. He's supplying the good liquor apparently," he sighed.

Isabelle choked in surprise. "Are you serious?! That's great! I'm so proud of you for taking initiative, Alec! Did you give him the time?"

Alec shook his head and rubbed the back of his neck. "Yes. Should I change into something more....more?"

"Cool, cool. That's if you want to, of course. Or you can just leave on what you're wearing."

This was his first time ever throwing a mundane party, so this was a lot to take in. Should he wait? Should he make the party a date? Questions like these ran through his mind at warp speed and he felt himself getting sick to the stomach. He moaned, leaning forward and holding his stomach.

"Alec, are you okay?" asked Isabelle. She didn't follow up with another question. She was one of the few people who hardly ever did.

"I feel funny in stomach. Sickly....I might even throw up...." Alec took a deep breath to calm himself. "I'm nervous, Iz. I don't even know why."

Isabelle's face was serious for a moment before she slowly smiled. "I think you got the butterflies, big brother. The huge case of them, too."

"Butterflies? Is that bad, Izzy? Are butterflies bad?"

Isabelle laughed and clapped her hands together. "No! It just means you're nervous! You're nervous because you're seeing Magnus later and this is the first time you're seeing him for an entirely different reason than what you're used to. Alec-" She made her way over and kneeled down in front of him, taking his hand in hers. "You're in love, brother. You're in love for the first time and it's okay to be scared and nervous and feel a million different feelings at once. That's what love does to you."

Alec squinted. "But I don't understand why I'm so nervous. We've been on tons of dates before. This is no different."

"And that's okay too. You're going to feel a million different things and won't understand them. Magnus too. You're both going to feel a lot of things but you know what? You'll have each other to help go through them. To help understand what it is you're feeling-"

Alec watched as Isabelle choked back a sob, wanting to understand why she was crying. ".....Izzy? What's wrong?"

Isabelle wiped her eyes with a hand. "I know you don't really understand all these emotions and feelings, Alec. You've been closed off for most of your life. But know that you're not alone, okay? You have Magnus, and he loves you so much. So, so much. I know he does. So don't fight the feeling, okay? Embrace it. Show him what an extraordinary being you are like you show us everyday."

She pulled away before Alec could ask a question, but by that time the kitchen door flew open and Jace waltzed in with boxes in his arms with Clary close behind with cases of beer and alcohol.

"I know what it looks like Clary, but you can't have New Year's without beer!" Jace exclaimed.

Clary rolled her eyes. "Of course you can! No one needs four cases of beer, Jace. It's just going to be five of us-"

"Six!" Isabelle called out, all signs of her crying moments ago completely gone. "Six of us. Magnus might be popping in later too, if that's okay with everyone. Alec invited him."

"That's cool with me. Way to go, bro! Taking initiative. I like it," Jace winked as he set the boxes on the counter. "So I ended up getting mozzarella sticks, wings, potato skins, and lattice fries. Lots of greasy finger food."

"And I think Simon said he's ordering pizza for us too. No shortage of food for us tonight," Clary sighed.

"Or beer," Jace laughed as he popped open a bottle of beer and took a sip. "Maybe we can even get Alec to have a drink tonight. What do you say Alec? Wanna have a beer with the guys? Or do you want a fancy margarita?

Alec cringed. He hated margaritas. The smell alone was disgusting and he wasn't sure how Magnus managed to drink it. "No. Not really."

Clary and Isabelle snickered as Jace was shot down. He didn't seem too bothered by it. "You're missing out, dude. I'm ten times funnier when I'm drunk or buzzed."

"I think you mean annoying. Not funnier," Isabelle ducked as Jace tried to snatch her up in his arms. "No! Jace, don't!"

Alec watched as his siblings acted silly in the kitchen. He didn't care much for their shenanigans. They were too rowdy anyway. "I don't think Jace is annoying. Just cocky," he pointed to Jace and shook his head. "But annoying is a good word to describe him sometimes."

"Aww. Jace, why can't you be cute like Alec? I swear, there are days when I just want to dump you and be with Alec instead," Clary pat Alec on the leg and smiled as she spoke.

"I don't like girls, Clary. Sorry," Alec frowned.

"That's okay. You can still be my snuggle buddy when I'm drunk though, right?" She tickled his arm and snorted. Alec rolled his eyes.

"You think we have enough food for tonight? Including the pizza that is...." said Jace as he popped opened the frozen chicken wings and peeked inside.

"I say we have more than enough, Jace. At least enough to feed us hungry bunch anyway," Isabelle slapped his hand away. "Don't touch. That's for tonight. We'll put them in the oven in a bit. It's too early for that now."

"But I'm hungry," Jace whined. "I'm making a sandwich before I pass out."

Watching Jace make a sandwich was oddly soothing. It was a nice pattern, Alec discovered. Bread, mayo, ham, turkey, lettuce, tomato, ham, turkey, mayo and bread. By the time Jace had the contents stacked together, the sandwich looked almost too big for his mouth.

"You gonna eat that?" Alec whispered. His mouth had drool around the corners as Jace flattened it with a hand.

"Yes. I'm gonna eat it all. Izzy said you ate already. You had a peanut butter sandwich," Jace bit into the bread and now had a mouthful of sandwich inside his mouth, making his speech muffled. "Is Magnus coming to the party tonight?"

Alec grimaced and squeezed his left thigh with his hands. "Don't talk with your mouth full, please. It's disgusting. Chew it up."

Jace rolled his eyes but did as he was told. After his bite was swallowed, he repeated, "Is Magnus coming to the party tonight?"

"Yes. As far as I know, he is."

"Cool. It'd be nice to get him to a party that isn't hosted by our smothering mother and with people his own age instead. Or at least her sort of be our age if he wasn't immortal. How old is he again?"

Alec shrugged. "Not sure. We didn't exactly have the immortality talk yet."

Jace shoved the last bite of sandwich into his mouth. "That's not too bad. At least he's not 40. That would've been weird."

Alec cocked his head. "Weird? How?"

"Uh-" Jace rubbed his neck. "Well if he was 40, he'd be old enough to be your dad. That would be weird. Some people are into that stuff though. It's called a Daddy kink."

Alec wasn't sure what to make of this so he kept quiet, watching Jace pour up some Coke Cola instead. "Jace? I have a question."

"And I'm listening very intently. What's your question, bro?"

Alec squeezed his hands nervously before speaking. "Where should I take Magnus on a future date?"

Jace choked on his drink. "A date?! Like a date between two people?!"

"Are there supposed to be more people?" Alec asked, squinting in annoyance.

"No, no. I'm just surprised that you're asking me. Why didn't you go to Isabelle about this? She's more knowledgeable about this stuff than I am."

Alec mumbled under his breath. "Izzy talks too much. She goes on for hours...."

Jace smirked. "Well you're not wrong about that. She's enough to make anyone's ears bleed...but yeah. About your situation. Take him somewhere nice. It can be a restaurant or a movie-even a baseball game!" He saw Alec's horrified face and frowned. "But you don't like crowds...."

Alec groaned. "This was a bad idea. Maybe I shouldn't go on a date. This was a bad idea-"

"Don't change your mind! Magnus wouldn't like that at all! Here. I got an idea." Jace pulled out a chair and sat next to Alec. "How about I order Taki's for you guys and you can have a date at his place? Or at the restaurant. Whichever one you guys prefer."

Alec raised an eyebrow. "You would do that for me?"

"Of course! You're my brother and you're going on your date. I want you to be comfortable and have the best experience possible. Isabelle would want the same thing too."

Alec sighed in relief. A date at his place or Magnus' seemed like the best option for now, but he knew they'd eventually have to go out to new places if they continued dating. "Yeah. Okay. I like that idea. You're a good brother."

Jace bit his lip to keep from laughing as Alec pat him on the back. "I'm glad you think so. But I'm being serious about the date. Go somewhere comfortable where you feel at ease. Don't try to force things. If something is making you feel off, let Magnus know. He'll understand."

Alec nodded. All traces of unease he had about getting his siblings to help him with his date that he had earlier were now gone and a sense of relief flowed over him. He had doubts about going to Jace and Isabelle about this but he was happy he did. This date would've been a complete disaster if he hadn't.

"Jace! Babe, come here for a second. Simon is on the phone and wants to know what kind of pizza to order for later," Clary called out from the living room.

"Ah. Duty calls. We'll continue this conversation later," as he passed by, Jace rubbed Alec on the back. "Don't fret, brother. Your date will go amazing. Just keep your head up."

----------

Magnus didn't drink very often....or at least he tried not to. Not after seeing what it did to his mother years and years ago and what it made her into. He vowed to never go down the same route as she did, but he deeply considered having just one or two drinks at the party tonight. As long as he was responsible and knew his limits, he didn't see the harm in having some.

Jace's kitchen at his new apartment was shockingly expensive looking when he arrived later that evening, which wasn't that surprising considering it was built by an expensive family back in the early 1900's (another story entirely). It was very modern and very clean when Magnus stepped inside. He almost did so cautiously, afraid that a wrong move will bring the entire place down on their heads.

"Geez, you can come in you know. No one here's gonna bite you," Jace snorted. "Just toss your coat wherever. We're getting right down to business."

"Business?" asked Magnus as he tossed his coat onto a bench in the porch. "What kind of business?"

"One that requires much thought and dirty minds as possible," Jace smirked, leading him into the kitchen.

The gang were all gathered around the kitchen table with a box that read Cards Against Humanity, and Magnus instantly began to laugh. "Are you serious? Of all the games in the world?"

"We're always serious about Cards Against Humanity," said Jace.

"Almost as serious as Poker," Isabelle pulled out some cards and began to hand them out. "You ever play before?"

"What, poker or this one?" Magnus took a seat next to Alec, who was sipping a golden liquid from a glass. "Is that beer? That better not be beer. New Years is a time for margaritas."

Alec peered down into his glass. "It's apple juice. Not beer."

Magnus sighed in relief. "Good. Beer is gross. Even worse than whiskey or vodka."

"Clearly you've never tried rum," Isabelle snickered. "Alright. So who pooped recently?"

Alec choked mid swallow. "Wh-what? Pooped?"

"Yeah. That's how the game goes. The person who pooped most recently starts off first. Says right here in the instructions," she tapped the paper for emphasis.

"Well it wasn't me. I pooped yesterday," Jace announced.

"Same here," Clary said.

"I pooped this morning," Isabelle chimed in.

"This is getting really weird," Magnus mumbled, prompting Alec to nod in agreement.

"Should we call the neighbors and see when they pooped while we're at it?" Jace smirked.

"The neighbors aren't even playing!" Clary hit his shoulder but had a smile on her face as she did so.

"Okay, Izzy. You go first. This talk of who pooped when is making everyone feel weird. Especially me," Magnus grabbed his cards and looked them over, snorting at a few of them.

Beside him, Alec looked confused with his cards. He had no idea what any of them meant and it was frustrating him. "Um....I don't want to play. I'll just watch."

"Aw, why? It's more fun the more people you have," Isabelle pouted. "More fun when you're drunk too. Nothing makes sense but it's funny as hell."

Alec didn't find any of this funny. It just gave him a headache as he tried to figure out what everything meant. "No....I'll just watch. The cards don't make sense."

"You can watch me kick everyone's ass," Magnus winked. Alec smirked and put a finger to his lips while nodding.

Jace smirked. "I smell a challenge, Bane. First one to seven points. Losers have to strip down and jump into a snow pile outside."

Clary and Isabelle whipped their heads around to face him. "Have you lost your damn mind?! We'll freeze to death out there!" Isabelle shouted.

"Then don't lose," Jace snickered.

By this point, everyone was determined not to lose. Alec watched closely as they laid down their cards and read out ther answers, cackling at the ridiculous sounding ones. Magnus had put on his New Years attire: a sparkling hat with 2017 written on it. It lit up with a button on the inside.

"Magnus," Alec whispered. He had gotten really good at guessing who was going to win.

Magnus leaned in. "Yeah?"

Alec pointed to two cards. "Play those two."

"You think so?" Magnus pulled the cards out and snorted. "You're terrible but this is hilarious."

Alec smiled and watched as everyone submitted their answers. He hoped Magnus would win. He didn't want him to strip down and jump into the snow. It was much too cold for that.

"Alright. The moment of truth." Jace cleared his throat and read out the black card. "Who doesn't love blank and blank on Christmas Eve?" He flipped the first two cards and read them out, then the second pair, and finally the last. "Who doesn't love roasting children over an open fire and dropping f bombs on Christmas Eve?"

Everyone roared with laughter, with Isabelle having to wipe her eyes with her sleeve because she was laughing so hard. Alec didn't really get what was so funny. Roasting children over an open fire didn't sound very nice. F bombs didn't either. But they were the cards he chose for Magnus after all.

"Oh damn. I'm gonna have to go with roasting babies and f bombs," Jace lift the cards and tossed them in the used pile. "Whose cards did they belong to?"

Magnus slowly took the black card and smirked. "Me."

Jace slammed a fist down. "Bullshit! You cheated!"

"How does one cheat in Cards Against Humanity?!" Magnus hollered, apologizing when Alec winced beside him.

"I don't know! But you did it somehow. Dammit. Looks like we're stripping down, ladies," Jace cringed as he looked out the window. "Think the snow is very cold?"

"Hmm Jace who knows. Could be lukewarm this year," Isabelle rolled her eyes as she took off her jeans.

Alec covered his eyes as his siblings and Clary stood there in their undergarments. "I'm glad I didn't play. Snow is too cold to jump in."

"I agree. I'm just glad I won," Magnus smirked as Jace shot him a look. "Oh don't be such a sore loser, Jace. A deal is a deal. Losers jump in the snowpile."

The Lightwood siblings raced out, yelling as they jumped into a pile of snow, Clary close behind. The three of them screamed and came racing back in, bodies shivering and covered in snow.

"Hot-hot shower! Right now!" Isabelle's teeth chattered. "I claim the-the guest bathroom!"

Jace grabbed Clary's hand and smirked. "Save water, shower with Jace?"

Clary giggled. "You're so bad. But sure. Why not?"

When they all disappeared into the bathrooms, Alec sighed heavily.

Magnus nudged him gently with an elbow. "Don't be like that. They're just cold from the snow."

"I know," Alec smiled softly. "Why did you suggest losers had to jump in the snow?"

"Well why not? It's New Year's Eve. We're allowed to have a little fun before the year is over. Why not take a couple of risks?"

Take a couple of risks. This resonated inside Alec as he thought about what Magnus said. It was almost the new year. A time to start new. A time to start fresh. He could take a few risks tonight and then start fresh the next day. "Risks? Like what?"

Magnus thought about it. "Well....nothing big. Like that'll ruin your life or anything. Just little things. Talk to the person you liked for a long time. Buy the shoes you've always wanted. Ask for a raise. Just small things like that."

This seemed intriguing. "Can I take a risk right now?"

"Of course!" Magnus laughed. "What did you have in mind?"

Alec cautiously reached for Magnus' hand and leaned in, placing the most gentle of kisses on his lips. "That's what I had in mind."

Magnus smiled. "That's not really a risk but I like the fact you take initiative. Feeling brave today, Alexander?"

Alec nodded, a broad smile on his face. "New year, new me."

"Well it's not the new year yet. Let me keep the old Alec just for a while longer, okay? I'm very fond of him."

Alec smirked and let himself be kissed on the cheek, only pulling away when Jace reappeared in the kitchen wearing fresh, warm clothes. "Jace! That was a fast shower."

Jace bit his lip. His left eyebrow was raised and he looked like he was trying not to smile. "Yeah. It was fast. So uh....whatcha doin?"

Magnus went red in the face. "Nothing. Just....having a drink."

"You're red in the face," Jace smirked.

"It's the alcohol."

"You've drank a glass of water so far, Magnus."

Alec cleared his throat. "Awkward. Let's drop the subject now. Let's put the food in oven. Magnus will help."

Jace snorted but said nothing more of the scene that he walked in on.

The evening went on. Simon eventually showed up with two large pizzas and even more alcohol which at that time, Magnus had a nice buzz on. He could see why his mother used to prefer to stay drunk like this all the time. He felt free. He felt good for once in his life. He didn't even care when Simon took a selfie that didn't include him and that was saying a lot.

The food was laid out on the large counter and on the island in the middle of the kitchen. Everyone was digging in and laughing and having a good time.

Everyone except for Alec.

Noticing that his friends and family were starting to get a little tipsy, he snuck out to the guest room and sat down on the leather couch, uncomfortable with the way it felt on his skin. Occasionally he'd glance up at the large photo of a crowd of people above the couch on the wall and wondered why Jace bought it. It didn't make sense to him.

"Alec! Where did you go?!" Magnus hollered from the kitchen. He made his way into the living room, stumbling along as he went. "There you are. Silly goose. Hiding?"

Alec didn't like the way Magnus giggled or the way his speech slurred. It was obvious that he was drunk. "No. Everyone's getting rowdy. It makes me uncomfortable."

"A Shadowhunter that doesn't like rowdy situations?!" Magnus snorted and poked Alec's chest. "Sorry, gorgeous. It's just so good, you know? It's the new yeeeeeeear."

Alec said nothing when Magnus poked him, knowing he didn't mean it in a rude way. "Magnus....you're drunk."

Magnus looked offended. "Am not! I'm just peachy."

He spit when he pronounced the P, which made Alec flinch and wipe his face with a hand. "Ew. And yes. You're drunk. Very drunk." He jumped in surprise when Magnus crashed into him and embraced him in a bear hug. His body tingled uncomfortably. "Magnus? N-no. This isn't....no."

Magnus giggled. "Did I ever tell you how much I love you? I loved you the moment I laid-" he hiccuped. "Laid eyes on you. You're so tall and handsome with your dark haaaaair and Bambi eyes."

Alec perked up in amusement. "Bambi eyes? Like the Disney Bambi?"

"Yes! Just like that! And your voice is so deep and your personality is so nice." He hiccuped again and laughed. "I just loooove you, Alexander. More than I love myself."

Feeling pleased, Alec reached down and took Magnus' hand in his own, their fingers entwined. "I love you too."

"Lots and lots? Niiiice," Magnus giggled for the millionth time. At that moment, a thought popped into his drunk mind. "Alec, there's something I need to tell you-"

"Twenty seconds until midnight!" Simon raced in, tripping over the leg of the table and falling flat on his face. Everyone else followed behind and howled with drunken laughter.

Alec turned to face Magnus again. "What did you want to tell me?"

The countdown began. "Ten!"

Magnus began to panic. "I should've told you before-"

"Nine!"

"I had a talk with-"

"Eight!"

"I should've known better than to agree-"

"Seven!"

Alec squeezed his hands. "You're not making any sense-"

"Six!"

Magnus sputtered. "I'm sorry Alec-"

"Five!"

"For what?" Alec groaned, feeling himself getting impatient.

"Four!"

Magnus hiccuped. "I kept a secret from you-"

"Three!"

"And it was wrong of me to keep it-"

"Two!"

"Magnus, just say it!"

"One!"

"I bought a wed-"

"HAPPY NEW YEAR!"

Everyone began to cheer and clap as fireworks erupted outside in the sky. The noise from it all blocked out what Magnus was saying and Alec found it extremely difficult to focus on one thing. He closed his eyes tight, trying to block out the noise.

"Happy new year, Alexander." Magnus whispered. "New year, new you. Remember?"

Alec nodded, eyes still closed. "Yeah. Happy new year, Magnus. Start fresh. New. Take risks. Little things."

Magnus smiled drunkenly and pecked Alec on the lips. "Little things. I love you, Alec. So much."

Alec hummed and smiled in content. "You're so drunk right now."

"Hush. Just let me enjoy this. I might not even remember this in the morning...."

Alec shrugged, frustrated that Magnus never told him what he wanted to say. Magnus might not remember but he definitely would.