The universe hates me.

I groaned as I walked out of the bathroom, bending forward and reaching out for my bed.

Did I mention being a girl sucks? 

No? No worries, I'll do it now. BEING A GIRL SUCKS.

Why do I have to go through this insufferable pain every month?

I mentally cursed everything I could find on my way to the bed. My mom for bringing me into the world as a girl, males for being the lucky species of not bearing the pain, nature's law for creating us as the life-bearers, and the carpet for not being very smooth to walk upon. You name it.

“Is it a good time for me to crack a period joke to lighten up your mood?” Shawn sheepishly walked in.

I shot him a death glare as an answer.

“I'll take that as a no.” He scratched his head while I curled up inside my duvet.

“Are you in pain right now?” He searched my eyes in concern. 

“Not right now. It would start after a couple of hours. The first three days are hell.” My hands reflexively crossed around my stomach.

“Then I guess it would be best if you stay in today. I'll see you again after I quickly check in with Chloe.” He walked and sat beside me, smoothed a few locks of my hair.

“I wanted to meet Chloe so much.” I pouted, my voice almost teary and I poked his shoulder slowly yet strongly. That was one of the weird habits that I picked over the years.

“I know, and you will. Once you feel better, I'll take you to her.” He tried to give me his best smile to make me feel less miserable.

“Okay.” I sighed.

“I'll see you soon. I love you.” He kissed my forehead and got up.

I felt all wiggly inside my stomach. How was it that such a simple act could work up so many emotions? 

“I love you.” I smiled and pulled him to kiss his cheek.

His heartfelt smile brightened up my grumpy day and he winked at me before turning back and leaving the room.

“Guess it's just you and me, Mr. Snuggles.” I hugged my stuffed penguin as I crashed into my fluffy pillow.

~

It wasn't even half an hour before the horrendous rings of a phone call woke me up from my sleep. If I thought my day couldn't get worse, I thought wrong.

I somehow reached for my phone in a sleepy state, my eyes barely open. I squinted my eyes to get a better look at the caller ID. It was Zoey.

I instantly swiped the screen right and attached the phone to my ear.

“Hey, bestie! How are you? How is it going? Is everything okay? Are you enjoying yourself?” Zoey blasted with her extra chirpy voice, too chirpy for my grumpy half-asleep self.

“Aren't you extra chirpier today? What's up?”

“Eh, I am just pretending to be cheery and shiny. You know, trying to sugarcoat it with fakeness to escape reality and stuff.” Her voice suddenly lost its charm, despite trying to conceal it, the hint of sadness was obvious in her tone.

“What happened, Zoey?”  I sat back up, my sleep suddenly disappeared into non-existence.

“They are taking things to the next level. And by next level, I mean, they started throwing things at each other. They are completely trashing the house. I can't even sit somewhere peacefully in a corner. I had to get out so I came to Niall's place.”

“How long?” 

“Last night. They didn't even notice that I was gone. They're just too busy yelling and throwing stuff at each other.”

I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head in exasperation. That poor girl didn't deserve this.

“I am so sorry that you have to go through it. I am so sorry that I am not there with you right now.”

“Hey hey! As long as I'm not the one getting hit by a lamp, I'm okay. I made peace with the fact that my ‘family’ is a lost case now. You asked me to talk to my mom and I did, and then I realized that there wasn't any point anymore. She is long gone. My mother died when my father did. She is now just a woman who is my legal guardian and apparently my biological mother. There's nothing that can be done about it. I just have to bear them for a few more years and then, I am a free bird.” She said it out loud bluntly. I didn't blame her though.

 I don't know how long a person could take in such an environment before it finally numbs you to a point where you stop feeling about that situation anymore.

“Enough of the gloominess, give me some deets. Did you two, you know, finally did the ‘deeds’?” And she is back to her Zoey self again.

“Zoey!” I warned her.

“Oh come on! I am not a kid anymore. Stop treating me like one.” I could feel her rolling her eyes at me.

“Sure you are not.” I mocked.

“I am serious. I need to know all the details once you come back.” She actually yelled at her speaker, blasting off my poor eardrums.

“Jesus, Zoey. Calm down a bit, will ya? You're gonna blast off my eardrums someday.”

“Hehe, sorry.” She giggled.

A knock on the door echoed around the room and I looked up through my eyelash to find a nervous Lexi frantically clicking her boots on the floor.

“Hey, I need to go. I'll call you later okay?” I spoke as I kept my eyes glued at Lexi.

“Yeah sure.” and with that, the line was cut.

“What happened, Lexi?” I carefully let out my words as I made my way towards her.

“I didn’t get in.” Her words merely fell out, her voice breaking. I sprinted towards her and pulled her into a tight hug. I could feel her body shivering.

“Shhh… It’s okay, it’s okay. It’s all gonna be okay.” I ran my hand up and down her back to send some sort of comfort. It didn’t seem to work much though.

“No, it’s not. It’s not gonna be okay. I messed this up too. Again! Why do I keep messing everything up in my life? The moment I think that it’s all going to work out in the end, then bam! Welcome to my life.” I felt her hand urging up through my back towards her face. 

Lexi was never the emotional kind. She never let her emotions drive her and maybe that’s what made her the way she was now; too bottled up that she didn’t have a slightest clue how to let them out. Maybe, that’s why she tried too hard to act cool and not let anyone know the depth underneath the facade.

I realized we all had much more in common than we let on. My thoughts drifted towards Maddie and the things she told me that day. Come to think about it, it wasn’t just me who tried to put up a facade of someone I wanted to be, when in reality, I just wasn’t.

“Don’t stress so much about it, Lexi. Maybe it was just not your day. I know what you are capable of. And that university would be crazy to not admit a talent like you. Just don’t give up yet.”

“Aunt Arlene would be so disappointed in me.” She placed her head on the crook of my neck and sobbed inaudibly.

“She wouldn’t. I am sure she would understand. And you shouldn’t really worry about that.” I caressed her hair, flipping off a few locks of her smooth hair, and her body slowly began to unwind the tension that was built up.

“Sometimes, it isn’t necessary to succeed in your first attempt. I know, it would have sounded wonderful but only to brag about. Who are we trying to impress? The world? The people we barely know? Or the people we knew our entire life? They would know how much you worked hard for it. So, it is okay to have setbacks. We all do at some point in our lives. But it is your dream, don’t give up on it because of a few setbacks. You know what they say right? Shred some tears, yell on top of your lungs and get up and fight for what’s yours.”

She chuckled, shaking her head and I joined her too. She finally pulled out of my embrace, still chuckling; her eyes gleaming mingling with the ray of sunlight seeping through the window.

“You can open a podcast of motivation, you know. You will become hella rich.” She rested both hands on her waist while looking at me up and down.

“Yeah sure.” I waved my hand in the air in dismay.

“I am serious!” 

“And so am I.”

“You’re such a bitch.”

And Lexi is back.

“Learned from the best.” I winked and smiled mischievously and walked towards my bed.

“Where is Shawn?” She climbed onto the bed with me.

“The hospital.”

“You didn't go with him?”

“I wanted to, but today is one of the awful days of the month,” I answered sarcastically and she chuckled.

“But it's okay, he will be here soon.”

“Here? Like to hang out with you, or you know, a date?” She looked at me with curious eyes that demanded the littlest details.

“No, he lives here now. For a few days.” I answered nonchalantly as I smoothed my pillow so I could launch back.

“WHAT?” Her shriek echoed around the room and it took me a few moments to interpret her reaction.

She doesn't know that Shawn lives here now.

I might have forgotten to mention this with the group.

“Umm… Yeah. He lives here. Sorta. For like a few days. Then he will go back to his house” I tried to make sense of the words that escaped my mouth. But it didn't.

“Why… exactly is he living here, then?” She was trying to make sense of my words that reached her ears.

“I didn't want him to stay alone at that house. His dad isn't there and neither is Chloe, so I didn't want him to leave him alone there until one of them returns.”

“Hmm, that makes sense. God! You guys are so cute, I feel like puking.” She feigned a disgusted face and enacted puking beside the bed.

“Not on my bed. Or the carpet. It takes me forever to clean it!” 

“Geez, crazy bitch. I won't do it for real. But next time, I definitely would.” She winked at me with her signature mischievous, sarcastic smile.

We chatted for a while, talking about anything and everything. It turned out, Lexi had quite some tea about almost everyone. I couldn't help but laugh my guts out about the stupidest and funniest gossip she tried to enact. Hours went by but the rings of laughter remained intact.

~

I tossed around the bed, my hands clutching my stomach, drops of warm moisture running down my forehead despite the cool temperature hovering around the bedroom.

The pain slowly began to get worse. The pills were taking some time to show the effect and until then, I had no idea how to make it hurt less. I suddenly began to grow more restless and uneasy with each passing second. All I wanted was just for it to stop.

Finally, after a few unbearable minutes, the dose started to exhibit its effect, easing down the pain. I touched my forehead, shoving the hair back, and stared at the ceiling. It was one of the worst cramps that I had in my life. Though I say it every other month or so, it still sucked.

I lowered down the AC temperature and pulled the duvet up to my chin. A knock echoed around the room and I hissed in a low voice, praying that whoever it was had a good reason to disturb me or else, they better run for the hills.

I pushed myself up to find Shawn walking towards me with a few things that rested on his engulfed hands and a small smile escaped on my face instantly.

“Here, take this.” He stretched his arm and I looked up at him with curiosity.

“Take the hot water bag. It will help with soothing the pain.” He placed the warm bag on my lap and went back on his next item, 

“I bought you your favorite chips and…” He placed them at the nightstand, “I wasn't sure which ice cream you are craving so I bought you your two favorites; chocolate and cookie dough and a box full of your favorite chocolate.” He placed them both in my hands.

It took me a few moments to take in his adorable gesture.

“Y-You didn't have to do that.” My voice was merely audible.

“Of course I did. It is the least I could do for my girl when she is in pain.”  “Oh and that reminds me, I asked your mom to keep an eye on the soup that we made for you. I better go and check it once.” He gave my hand a tight squeeze before standing up.

“What did I ever do to deserve you?” I asked, staring at him in awe.

“Hmm… Probably something very good. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go and check the soup I made for my girl. She is one moody thing.” He chuckled.

“You're spoiling me. You know that right?”

“Yes, and that is my intention. I intend to spoil you as much as I can. Now, allow me.” He bowed down and walked out of the room, not before shooting me the smile that I grew so fond of.

How did I ever manage to get so lucky?

Hey, y'all! How are you all doing?

We're just four chapters away! This is crazy!

Question of the day: What's your favorite pizza topping? (Why do I feel like there's going to be a battle in here XD)

Mine would be Pepperoni and extra cheese.

I hope you liked this chapter.

Feel free to vote and comment.

I'll see you guys soon.
Stay tuned♡.

~Loveya~( ˘ ³˘)