Chapter Nineteen
Plans and Pain
Grace Cullen-Swan
September 3, 2006

The three weeks of Edward and Bella's honeymoon were some of the most stressful weeks of my existence. The family was meeting constantly to make plans, discuss new plans, change the previous plans, and so on and so forth. Every moment of our existences were spent preparing in some way for the impending confrontation with the Volturi. The only reprieve I had from the non-stop terrifying talk of the Volturi was my constant diligence over Elizabeth's well-being. Having a nine month old baby with the brain of a genius was an incredibly hard task.

She's still dependent enough to need help with feeding, changing, and other task, but she's so smart that she desperately wants to be involved in things. It hasn't helped that she's an early crawler either. One moment, we were all sitting in the living room watching her play at my feet as we discussed our newest plan, and the next thing we knew she had managed to crawl at lighting pace across the room to Esme. Her level of coordination has always been surprising, but to see a baby move in such a way was surprising at times. Now, after only being able to crawl for a week, she's managing to stand up on her feet and hold herself up using furniture or someones leg. I nearly had a breakdown when I walked into the kitchen one day to see Emmett trying to teach her to walk.

I desperately wish Charlie was here for these moments. Moments when I feel like a terrible mother for causing Elizabeth to get so frustrated over her circumstances. Mentally, she's not a baby, and so it all becomes so aggravating to her that she has to be cared for like one. Sometimes, I think I would've preferred for her to keep growing at the same abnormal pace she did in-womb. But that would mean less time with her and I can't picture a world without her in it.

"Aunt Grace." Alice caught my attention as she entered my bedroom, where I had been rocking Elizabeth by the window as I was lost in thought. "Do you have a minuet to talk with Jasper and I? It's very important." She stressed to me.

"Of course, Alice." I nodded, setting a now sleepy Elizabeth into her crib before following her across the hall to her bedroom. "What's going on?" I asked them both as Jasper quickly shut the door behind me.

"We have a plan." He responded. "But you aren't going to like it."

"Try me." I countered him, knowing I had been hearing plenty of plans lately.

"We need witnesses, which we've already talked about with the others, but that's not going to be enough. We need hard evidence that hybrids not only exist but are no threat." Alice stepped in. "We need to find a hybrid to stand witness."

"But that would mean having to find Joham, or one of his children, if they're even still alive." I sighed. "Besides, Carlisle would never let us leave right now. With our gifts, there's too big of a risk of being ambushed, it's too dangerous."

"You're right. He wouldn't let us leave." Jasper nodded. "So we wouldn't be telling anyone where we're going or what we're planning."

"You're asking me to let my brother think two of his beloved children have completely deserted his coven in a time of extreme circumstances?" I gasped.

"We're asking you to come with us." Alice pleaded with me. "You're the one that Joham will listen too. You're the one that can navigate South America safely. You're the key in all of this."

"This is insane." I shook my head, pacing the room. "I can't. I can't do that to my brother, my kids, our our family."

"Would you rather them hate you and be alive? Or love you and die innocent?" Alice shot at me, freezing me in my pacing.

"Be alive." I answered quickly. "No question."

"Then you have to believe me that this is our only option." She stated firmly. "Please, Aunt Grace."

"Okay." I agreed, immediately feeling the worst sense of guilt and grief tear through my body. "Okay, I'll go with you." I nodded.

"Thank you." Jasper told me sincerely, hugging my side in support.

"So, what exactly is the plan?" I asked dejectedly, resigned to the fact that I was going to cause my family such turmoil in an effort to preserve their lives.

"Leave a note in your room for Carlisle, tell him that you're sorry but you just can't keep going on without Charlie. Tell him you're not as strong as everyone thinks you are and you can't keep fighting your grief. Tell him that you're going to Aro to beg him to see reason before you ask for death. Once you're good and gone I'll cover for you by faking a vision and confirming your story. I'll tell everyone that Aro will still decide to come judge us and that he'll grant your request knowing you could never work with the people that killed your mate." Alice explained quickly.

"You want to tell my brother that I'm committing suicide? Alice, that's-"

"Necessary." She cut me off sharply. "Any other story will only led him to try to find you and bring you home. He'd be on our trail the entire trip. He'd get himself injured by nomads trying to follow us."

"Okay." I sighed. "Keep going." I urged, feeling like I was about to vomit.

"Okay then." She nodded. "Once you leave, you need to go to Norton, Virginia and find Peter and Charlottes' house. Jasper and I will be there shortly. We'll have to wait long enough for me to fake my vision of you and send Carlisle and Esme off to London to get Alistair."

"London?" I questioned. "That's a little too close to Italy for comfort, isn't it?"

"Aro won't know. He doesn't suspect that we know anything." Alice shook her head. "They'll be perfectly safe."

"Alright then." I sighed. "Can I at least go hug Carlisle and Esme before I go?"

"Of course, but make it look convincing." Jasper nodded sadly, my grief no doubt consuming his gift.

"Remember, don't say a word about the plan." Alice told me. "I'll pack your bag while you say goodbye." She offered me a sad smile and a hug before drifting back to my bedroom.

I took a deep breath before going down the stairs to the kitchen where Carlisle and Esme sat talking at the kitchen island.

"Grace." Carlisle greeted me happily, torturing me further, "What's wrong?" He asked, frowning as he noticed my misery, coming to my side.

"Nothing." I shook my head, trying to put on a brave face. "I just wanted to come see you two."

"No, what's wrong?" Esme cooed, coming to hug me as well.

"I miss him so much." I shook my head, feeling tears start. "I just can't take this grief."

"Oh, Grace." Carlisle sighed, hugging me tightly. "I'm so sorry."

"I know." I nodded. "I love you, Brother. So much." I swore to him, not wanting to let him go.

"Come here, Sister." Esme cooed as she took me from Carlisle's arms and hugged me lovingly. "We love you so much, just hold on to that, it has to get easier one day." She smiled hopefully at me.

"Maybe." I shrugged. "I'm going to go hunting. Will you take care of Elizabeth for me?" I asked her.

"Of course." She agreed happily. "Are you sure you don't want to wait? Edward and Bella will be home any minute."

"No, I should go now." I shook my head. "Tell them how much I love them." I told Carlisle and Esme, and they shared a worried look.

"Okay." Carlisle nodded, hugging me tight one last time. "Hurry back. I'll miss you." He told me sweetly, kissing my cheek as we pulled apart.

"I'll miss you too, both of you, so much." I promised them with a sad smile before drifting back up the stairs to my room.

"That was so hard." I told Alice the moment I shut my door behind me.

"I know, but it had to be done." She assured me as I went to my desk and quickly wrote out a letter per Alice's instructions. "Here's your bag. Remember Norton, Virginia. Peter and Charlotte are expecting us." She spoke, putting my bag on my shoulder and pushing me towards the window. "Go, now." She ordered.

Without thinking, I jumped and took off running through the thick foliage of Forks. I kept all thoughts of the family I was devastating out of my mind as I ran towards my destination.

For the first time since losing Charlie, I felt like I could finally think clearly as I ran. No concern, no worry, no overwhelming grief, just thoughts of my destination ahead of me and the paths I would take to get there.

In what felt like no time, I had arrived in Norton, Virginia and paused to collect myself and observe my surroundings. I was up on a cliff side, looking down at a quaint Main Street kind of town, and observing the stillness of the night around me when the rustling of brush behind me jarred me back to reality.

"Whoa, sorry Ma'am." A tall, lean, male vampire with long hair that was nearly white it was so blond nodded as I turned towards him. "I didn't mean to startle you. You must be Jasper's aunt?" He asked me gently.

"Yes." I nodded, shaking off my unease and offering him the most friendly smile I could manage. "I'm Grace Cullen." I introduced myself as I stuck my hand out.

"Peter." He responded as he shook my hand. "It's surprising we've never met, according to Char and I having visited your family so many times."

"I know." I laughed once. "We've always managed to miss each other."

"Well, if you're ready, I'll show you the way to the house. Char sure is excited to meet you." He offered and I nodded before running behind him through the surrounding trees to an even more remote hillside.

The house was cute, a simple-looking two bedroom I guessed, with obvious wear over the many years they've used it as a base. I was just about to comment on how cute it was, when a blonde version of Alice threw open the door and squealed my name.

"Grace Cullen!" She cheered again as we approached the house. "Oh, it is so good to meet you!" She giggled as she jumped the front porch steps and hugged me tightly.

"You as well." I laughed lightly at her enthusiasm. "You must be Charlotte."

"You betcha." She laughed easily. "Come on inside, I'm sure your heart is hurting something fierce." She frowned at me and I decided that I quite enjoyed her friendly nature as she led me in to the kitchen table. "So, Alice explained over the phone, I can't imagine how you all are handling this."

"Not well, I'm afraid." I sighed deeply.

"Oh, I see." Peter nodded. "I was having trouble figuring out what's wrong, but I think I've got it. You've lost your mate, haven't you?" He asked.

"Yes, how could you tell?" I asked wryly, knowing I was anything but my usual self.

"It's a quirk." He shrugged, offering me a sad apologetic smile.

"Peter likes to say he just knows shit sometimes, but personally I think he's just a good guesser." Charlotte giggled to me. "I'm sorry about your mate." She frowned at me.

"Thank you." I nodded. "I'm trying not to think about anything too deeply. I'm afraid if I do I won't stay on course."

"Perfectly understandable." Charlotte nodded. "Well, maybe we should get acquainted while we wait for Jasper and Alice?" She added and launched into all kinds of questions and stories in an attempt to distract me.

Hours later, Jasper and Alice joined us looking disturbed to their cores.

"What's wrong?" I asked worriedly, thinking the worse.

"The breakdown was worse than I expected." Alice sighed, coming to sit next to me after hugging Charlotte and Peter tight. "Bella and Edward got back just as I went downstairs to explain my fake vision. Bella lost it, Carlisle started yelling for someone to go after you, and everyone else just froze up in shock that you would do something so drastic. It took a lot of convincing for Carlisle to not call his Volturi contacts or run after you. I had to tell him that you'd be gone before he could do anything. He's devastated."

"I've killed my brother." I sobbed.

"Bella was in hysterics. She's lost three parents now. I really think she was so upset because she felt like she couldn't help you the way you had helped her." Jasper explained, only adding to my grief.

"And my daughter." I sighed, putting my head into my hands. "No." I shook my head, refusing to give into the pain again as I sat up. "No, I'm not going to grieve over the pain I'm causing. We have a job to do. What we're doing is going to save their lives. That's what I have to remember here. Staying focused on the good that we're doing despite the guilt that I have."

"Okay." Jasper nodded, giving me a proud smile. "Then we'll start our search for Joham first thing in the morning."