Title: I Have Died Everyday Waiting For You
Pairing: Sehun/Luhan
Rating: PG
Genre: Friendship, Romance

Summary: Sehun thinks he's just hallucinating things but Luhan proves him wrong. He is finally back after ten years.

(A/N: This is the sequel and the last part to the HUNHAN One Short Part 42 The Broken Crayon. So, if you haven't read that part yet, or you already forgot it, I suggest you read it first to understand this story!

This is for you who requested this very long time ago, I am sorry it took so long. For my dear HUNHAN shippers, I hope you'll love this!

I don't know why I cried to this TBH. )

*

After ten years, he sees him again.

Finally.

"I-I'm Sehun," Sehun says, crying hard as he breaks into a crooked smile. "It's me, Sehun.."

The beautiful boy's lips curve upward into a tiny smile, forehead crinkling as he lets out a soft chuckle. Sehun anticipates, heart beating wildly.

"I'm sorry, but I don't seem to know you."

Sehun stares.

"I have to go."

Luhan turns his back and without another word, leaves.

It's a blink of an eye when the sudden happiness Sehun feels melts down to his feet, as if his heart is crushing into shards. The surroundings seem to blur with every step Luhan makes away from him, and Sehun tries, trembling fingers stretching to the beautiful boy's general direction.

He whispers his name.

"Luhan.."

He doesn't look back.

Walking wobbly, Sehun doesn't know how he finally managed to get home, mind preoccupied. He is tired and confused, thinking of questions left unanswered inside his mind. His chest hurts, his eyes hurt, his body hurts, all of him hurts.

Why didn't he remember me?

Am I not that important?

Is he sick?

Is he the wrong person?

Is he pretending not to know me?

Am I just being delusional?

"God," Sehun murmurs, burying his face into his palm. "Why.."

He is definitely sure that boy was Luhan-- his wide doe eyes, his small angelic face, his pink thin lips, they all scream Luhan to him, not to mention he has the same exact name. He also has that broken crayon Sehun gave him a decade ago. Sehun is not just hallucinating things, he saw Luhan, he found his old friend.

He found his first love.

Sighing under his breath, Sehun slumps his body on his bed and ponders to himself. He has to find Luhan once more, he needs to see him and talk to him. Luhan should remember him again no matter what it takes.

*

The red scarf wrapped around his neck perfectly matches his porcelain white skin, Sehun thinks to himself, as he observes him from a far. There he is, standing, breathing, existing, not doing anything at all, yet it has Sehun staring too long to be considered normal, smiling by himself astounded. A dainty hand swats away a soft fringe, and Sehun follows with his eyes the sway of Luhan's golden brown hair with the air.

He is really beautiful.

Blinking too many times when a dried leaf blocks his vision, Sehun shakes his head furiously. He looks like a stalker.

"I look like a stalker," Sehun repeats to himself out loud, kicking a stray rock on the ground. He has already decided he will talk to Luhan and introduce himself again today, reminisce their childhood days and maybe build another potential friendship. But that's not going to happen if he's still hiding here behind a vending machine as he ogles at his old friend, waiting there by the bus stop. Any minute from now, Luhan will surely get on the bus, and it would be another feat for Sehun to wait again tomorrow.

He's been following Luhan for a week now, and still, no progress.

"Man up." Sehun clenches his fist against his chest, and steps forward bravely. "I can do this."

People pass against his direction, but he pays them no mind as he focuses on the boy standing meters away from him. Luhan is bouncing on his heels, looking really happy based on the genuine smile on his face, just how he had looked like when Sehun had offered him his toys to play with.

Sehun opens his mouth to speak, "Luh--"

"You came!"

He stops.

"I've been waiting for you for thirty minutes!"

"I'm sorry. Do you miss me?"

"Just little."

"Liar."

Luhan laughs, and it sends a new-found ache into Sehun's heart.

"Can you give me a bear hug?"

Frozen on his tracks, Sehun only watches Luhan hugging the newly-arrived boy taller than him for a few inches. He looks familiar but Sehun can't see him, only his back. The other boy ruffles Luhan's fluffy hair, kissing him on the forehead as Luhan closes his eyes. Chuckling, the guy makes an arc of his elbow, so Luhan links his arms inside the space of the other boy's arm. He has his head leaning against the other boy's shoulder as they walk away, talking about things Sehun couldn't care less.

It takes a minute before Sehun can realize he's still on the middle of the street staring at nothingness. Feeling a pinch on his heart, he turns his back and slowly walks away. Is he too late now? He already has a boyfriend, doesn't he? Sehun smiles bitterly. Why woudn't he? Luhan is beautiful, he's also kind and loving. Maybe in all the years they haven't seen each other, Luhan has been busy with his life and has found a guy that he truly likes.

So maybe that is also the reason why Luhan has already forgotten about him. Because in retrospect, Sehun was just a part of Luhan's childhood, not a part of his entire life, unlike Sehun, who has spent his ten years finding Luhan, hoping they could be reunited again. As ironic as it sounds, it's just now that Sehun realizes how ridiculous he has become for clinging on the past ten years ago to be exact. He's still hoping for Luhan to come back, but now that he sees him right in front of his very eyes, it seems like all became so useless, the fact that Luhan might not need him anymore hurts like a knife.

"Should I give up..." He drops his shoulders, gripping the can of coke between his palms. "Or should I not.." A sigh. "Maybe I should.."

Standing up as he discards his half-drunk coke on the nearest garbage can, Sehun waits for a while for the next bus to arrive. He sends a quick text to his mom saying he will be crashing at Jongin's house tonight before pocketing his phone. He's not in the mood to sleep in his room because it would only remind him of Luhan. The toys displayed on top of his cabinet only bring his childhood memories of his old friend.

After five minutes, the bus arrives and Sehun boards, heading to the farthest seat at the back with the right seat by the window already occupied. He sits beside the sleeping passenger, too busy with his thoughts to mind everything around him. Sehun leans his back and closes his eyes shut, Luhan's face replaying like a broken tape inside his mind.

"I didn't know he'd grow up so fine like that," he murmurs to himself, feeling a little heavier than before, literally heavy. He opens his eyes, and finds a mop of pink hair on top his right shoulder. Beside him, the passanger's head is lolling in time when the bus shakes. Sehun furrows his eyebrows.

"Hey." Shake. "Wake up." A groan. "You're drooling on my shirt."

"No~"

"Hey, you missed your stop."

That effectively wakes the stranger up, abruptly leaning away and wiping the side of his mouth glistening with drool. "What! Why! Where! When! How!"

"I didn't mean to wake you up, but your head is really heavy, so."

"Oh!"

Sehun nonchalantly watches how the pink-haired boy blinks up sleepily to him like a puppy, rubbing his nape as he yawns. He mutters a soft sorry before breaking into a tiny smile.

Something strikes into Sehun.

"What's your name?" Sehun suddenly asks. The passenger tilts his head, pointing at himself.

"Me?"

"Yes."

"My name's Baekhyun."

Sehun looks at the other direction, and quietly laughs heartily in disbelief, shaking his head. So his guess was right. It's really Baekhyun, Luhan's little brother. That Baekhyun who wears a shirt too big for him. That Baekhyun who walks barefoot outside the house. That Baekhyun whom Luhan really really loves. Sehun feels a little step closer now.

Crossing his arms over his chest, Baekhyun lifts an unamused eyebrow.

"Why are you laughing? Is there something funny about my name?"

"It's a small world, isn't it?"

Baekhyun backs away, looking all scared. "You're creepy."

"I'm not creepy," Sehun says, smiling. "I'm Sehun."

Baekhyun's mouth shapes into an 'o' as his bright eyes widen in recognition. A series of seconds pass of just staring intently at each other, before Baekhyun widely smiles. He straights up, yelling without further ado, "Sehun-hyung!!!"

"Thank goodness, you remembered me," Sehun mutters in relief, slapping a palm across his forehead. "I thought you wouldn't."

"How will I forget you! You always played with me and my brother when we're still young. You even gave me cookies and toys," Baekhyun muses, eyes smiling.

"You never changed. You're still cute and bubbly, and you look exactly the same when you were still," Sehun gestures a hand below the air, "this small." He laughs. "Aside from your pink hair, I guess."

"Oh, this, well," Baekhyun blushes, touching his own hair. "Luhan-hyung loves strawberries so I colored my hair strawberry pink as a gift. He likes it, though."

"It suits you."

"Really?"

Sehun chuckles. "Yeah."

"Thank you," Baekhyun says. "Sehun-hyung, have you met Luhan-hyung yet? Oh! You should see him now, he's really pretty, no kidding."

"I've already seen him many times. But unfortunately, he doesn't remember me," Sehun says, face falling into a frown. "Is he all right?"

"Yes," Baekhyun replies. "He's completely...fine and healthy."

"So why doesn't he remember me?"

Baekhyun sighs, "Do you want to come over to our house?"

A nod is Sehun's curt answer before they fall into a comfortable silence, Baekhyun humming a tune and Sehun flooding with curiosity.

*

Sehun learns that Luhan's family moved in to China and lived there for nine years. So that explains why everytime Sehun would go to their old house in hopes that Luhan came back, he would find nothing but the rusty mailbox and the broken fence. That went on for several years until he entered middle school. He stopped visiting Luhan's neighborhood only when his mother told him to give up when he turned fifteen.

According to Baekhyun, they have just moved in to Seoul last year by the next district a bus away where Sehun lives. The reason for going back to Korea, is their mother's remarriage with a kind man after their father died due to liver cancer two years ago.

"I'm sorry to hear that," Sehun says apologetically.

"No. He deserves to die," Baekhyun mutters, anger evident on the tone of his voice. "After what he did to Mother. After what he did to my brother."

Sehun is about to ask what happened, but seeing Baekhyun's eyes flickering with something akin to pain and rage has him shutting up, pressing his lips together. They walk together in silence, and Sehun feels his heartbeat thumping faster with the thought of seeing Luhan few steps from now.

"We're here," Baekhyun says, gesturing to a big and beautiful house in front of them. Sehun gapes for a brief moment as he unsurely glances left to right, left to right, like he is lost or something.

"What's wrong?"

"Are you sure this is where you live?"

"Yes. We are living here for a month now since Mother married my stepfather," Baekhyun says. "Why?"

"Oh, just--" Sehun scratches the back of his neck. "This house..."

"This house?"

Opening his mouth to say something more, Sehun is cut off by the sound of the front gates opening. Baekhyun turns around, smiling, to greet the person approaching them.

"Sehun? What are you doing here?"

Sehun looks at his best friend with his face painted in mixed emotions. He steps back and puts a hand on his forehead.

"J-jongin.."

"You know Jongin-hyung?" Baekhyun asks, beaming yet confused.

"He's like, my best friend," Sehun replies, turning to Jongin as he raises his shoulders. He has many things to ask and say but the only thing that comes out from his mouth is, "Dude. W-why?"

"Why what?" Jongin asks, equally confused. "What are you talking about?"

"Why didn't you tell me you know where Luhan is? You're completely aware that I've been searching for him for my entire life!" Sehun yells in exasperation. "Jongin, why didn't you tell me!?"

Jongin doesn't reply. Sehun deserves an answer.

"What, are you and Luhan together or something!?"

Baekhyun holds Sehun's elbow, pulling him away from the other boy. It's just now that Sehun realizes it is Jongin who was with Luhan earlier. It was Jongin, the person whom Luhan kissed and hugged and linked hands with. It is Jongin, his best friend. Sehun can't believe this, he can't accept that Jongin has betrayed him.

"Sehun-hyung, what are you talking about?" Baekhyun says within the thick silence. "Jongin-hyung is my stepbrother."

"What?"

"Which means I am also Luhan's stepbrother," Jongin adds, crossing his arms over his chest with a smug smile across his face. Sehun doesn't know if he'll feel relieved about it or not because he's still mad and jealous.

"So why didn't you tell me!?" Sehun shouts as if he were about to throw a fit.

"You never asked."

"Damn it!" Sehun yells, and he is crying now out of frustration. "I'm going to kill you!"

"That's not the real reason why he didn't tell you," Baekhyun says as he breaks into a cheeky grin. Jongin wiggles his eyebrows suggestively, making Sehun to hate him some more.

"Hyung asked us to."

"Asked you to what!?"

"Oh. I think it's about time," Jongin muses, staring at the figure behind Sehun.

"About time to what!?"

"Baekhyun, come on. Let's go inside," Jongin says with a chuckle as he pulls the pink-haired boy by the arm. Winking, Baekhyun disappears inside the house, leaving Sehun alone by himself.

"Why did you leave me here!?" Sehun hollers as he stomps his feet childishly. "Tell me where Luhan is!!!"

"Hey--"

"You ungrateful bastards! Goddamnit!"

A cough. "Uhm--"

"I'm going to castrate his bones, seriously."

Sehun buries his face into his palms as he curses softly under his breath. He swears Jongin is the worst best friend one could have, and Baekhyun is the most evil little brother. Those two are not really worthy of his time. Maybe he should go home now and watch TV so he could--

"Sehun."

Sehun holds his breath.

"You're looking for me, aren't you?"

Wait. Is this even real? He thinks he has just heard Luhan's voice from behind him--

"I'm right behind you," the sweet gentle voice says. "Please turn around and look at me."

Sehun is frozen.

"Don't you want to see me? Hey, it's me, Luhan. Don't you remember me?"

A tear rolls down onto Sehun's cheeks as he bites his lower lip enough to draw blood. His heart is unclenching and clenching due to happiness and fear. He keeps his back turned away, face covered with his hands as he sobs silently.

Luhan waits patiently, but Sehun is just standing there like a rock.

"I'm sorry if I left you without a word," Luhan mutters within the quiet, leaves rustling with the wind in the background and it has Sehun's skin chilling. "I'm sorry if I didn't come back for ten years. I'm sorry if I keep you waiting... And I'm sorry if I lied that I didn't remember you."

Sehun releases a shaky gasp.

"I just wanted to surprise you," Luhan continues. "And tell you... that I am finally here."

Sehun uncovers his face, dropping his hands by his sides as he still faces the other direction.

"I'm back Sehun, and I missed you so much."

Luhan steps forward but Sehun steps away.

"Don't."

Luhan pauses.

"Don't come closer," Sehun warns, looking down at the pavement.

"Why?"

"I'm scared," Sehun says, and there's a hitch at the end of his voice. "I'm scared that if you get near me, I won't be able to feel you because you're not real."

Silence.

Sehun wants to turn around and see for himself if someone is still there behind him, and a quick thought reminds him that maybe he's right, that this is just a good dream because it has been minutes since he heard Luhan's voice.

He is just hallucinating things.

"You are not hallucinating things."

A pair of arms wraps tightly around Sehun's torso from behind, and Sehun forgets how to breathe due to the warmth enveloping his whole body.

"Can you feel this?"

Sehun can't utter a single word.

"This is me hugging you from behind," Luhan says, leaning his cheeks against the cotton of Sehun's shirt. "Is it warm?"

A nod.

"Are you still cold?"

A shake of the head.

"Good. Because I'm not taking off my red scarf just to give it to you.."

"I-is it really you?"

Sehun feels him nodding against his back.

"D-do you really remember me?"

A light chuckle. "Of course. Why won't I remember the kid who gave me his 24-set of crayons? Oh, and a broken red crayon."

"You're still keeping it.."

"It is my most prized possession."

Sehun really thinks it is a miracle that when he slowly turns around, he sees the boy he longs to see for almost a decade. He is now standing face-to-face with the boy he has been waiting to come back, the boy he had been watching from a far for a week. Luhan smiles at him brightly, and without hesitation, Sehun embraces the living daylights out of him. Laughing as he smooths Sehun's back with his palm, Luhan doesn't notice he is being elevated on the ground.

"Hey, put me down!" Luhan yells, giggling as he squirms and holds onto the other boy's neck for dear life. "Sehun!"

"I'm so happy I can hold you now," Sehun says, still crying. "I can finally hug you and carry you like this."

"Please put me down. I'm getting dizzy!"

Sehun puts him down, blushing. "S-sorry. I was just too excited."

Luhan straightens his clothes and points at the road before them. "Do you want to take a walk?"

"Sure."

Luhan smiles, swatting away his messy fringe with his pinky finger, and Sehun thinks to himself Luhan indeed is really beautiful this close. Staring speechless, he observes how Luhan's long eyelashes flutter close against his rosy cheeks, studying how his delicate lips curve upward into a sincere smile as he calls out his name.

"Sehun?"

Oh, how Sehun loves to hear it again.

"Sehun."

"Huh?"

"Are you okay?"

Sehun clears his throat, cheeks flushed. "Yes. I'm just," he looks away, "mesmerized..."

Luhan beams. "By what?"

"By you. You're so beautiful, I can't.." he shakes his head, "even describe in words. It's like... I'm seeing a celestial being sent from above. I'm glad I saw an angel like you."

"Way to start a nice conversation," Luhan says, shrugging as he grins ear-to-ear. "I'm happy to see you, too. You're as good yourself."

"Does that mean I am handsome?"

"No way," Luhan says, knitting his brows cutely. "You're like, Adonis."

"Wow."

They both break into a fit of laughter, inch by inch they are moving closer until they are walking with their arms brushing against arms. And it's too warm. Sehun's belly is doing somersaults now as his heart beats wildly inside his chest.

"There is no time that I don't think about you," Sehun confesses. "Ever since you left, I keep on waiting for you. Every days passing by, I'm still hoping that you will come back. So I'm very happy that right now, you're here with me again." He laughs. "This is like a dream come true."

"Yes, it feels like a dream, right?" Luhan elbows his sides playfully. "But this is real. Me and you. Walking next to each other, is finally real."

A chuckle bubbles up into Sehun's chest, lowering his eyes to his and Luhan's shoes.

"So, you planned all of this?" Sehun asks. "You pretended not to know me, and you asked Jongin not to say a word about you?"

Luhan nods. "Sorry.."

"How about Baekhyun? Did you tell him to follow me to the bus stop. What, are you my stalker now?"

A blush runs up into the tips of Luhan's ears before he quietly mutters, "I didn't! That was pure coincidence... And I didn't know he was bringing you home now so I was really.." he swallows, "really nervous when I saw you."

"Me, too.."

"Did you cry?"

Sehun turns to glance at him. "Hm?"

"When you saw me for the first time, and I told you I didn't know you. D-did you cry?"

"Of course!" Sehun flails his arms in the air. "I actually moped for a week inside my room, and I sobbed until my eyes went red and swollen. My Mom thought I was hibernating.."

"The same goes for me," Luhan says, laughing out loud. "Sorry."

The orange sun is going down the mountains, but they never run out of things to talk about, catching up with each other's lives. It seems like they don't want this day to end shortly even though there is always a thing called tomorrow.

"Sehun, I keep my promise to you before we part ways."

"What promise?"

Luhan tiny smiles, grabbing Sehun's hand and putting it on top of his chest. "That you will always be in my heart."

Sehun's lips quirk upwards, squeezing Luhan's soft hand against his chest. "Me, too."

"I forgot to tell you something."

"Oh?" Sehun stops walking for a while, facing Luhan beside him. "What is it?"

"Come closer."

Sehun leans in closer to the other boy's pretty face only to be met with a pair of soft lips pressed against his own. He closes his eyes and stays still, allowing Luhan to kiss him gently. Feeling the warm tingle of Luhan's lips when he pulls away, Sehun opens his eyes slowly and sees a beaming Luhan in front of him, cheeks tainted with a blush of pink.

His heart races a thousand miles.

"Thank you."

"And?"

Luhan bites his bottom lip, rubbing his nape shyly as he looks down on the ground as if it were more interesting than Sehun's presence.

"Y-you already know what it is.."

Sehun only laughs at that. "Fine. I like you, too."

Luhan grins. "Okay."

"You're really pretty," Sehun adds.

Luhan skips ahead with a spring on his steps while Sehun just watches his back, smile never leaving his lips like it is naturally etched there until forever.

"Hey, don't walk too fast!"

"Come on, your legs are longer!" Luhan yells back as he runs, not bothering to take his eyes off Sehun, the boy who made him realize what true friendship is, and the boy whom he gave his first kiss to.

His first friend.

"Hey! Wait for me!"

His first love.

*

END