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It's priority that's matter the most. For jisung the only thing he care about in this world is his daughter. May sound cliché but that's true, if needed he will fight the world for her and he also will bear the pain of living this earth for her.

The only thing that he could think while freezing to death was what if his daughter wake up in the middle of the night and search him. What if she wake up crying because of the bad nightmares.Will she think her papa doesn't love her anymore. What if she hate him for leaving her alone for that long time. With so many ifs he let his tears made their way down his cheeks. Tears. Keyword. Because he never really stopped sobbing whole night which made him forget that he should be scared to sit outside alone all night. What happened to him? He hated dark.

He also found out how sad and beautiful sunrise is.

With a click sound he knew the door was open, he waited a little bit to show up a fimliar face but that never appeared. Jisung was glad he was allowed at home before any of his neighbours could see him. Specially those who always pick him.

Taking a moment or few jisung let himself feel the warmth of a home. Home? Fancy using that word. His only home is his daughter. Who is sleeping so peacefully with a pout. Jisung couldn't help but fondly smile once he get to run his hand through her black silk hair, when he finally was able to run his knuckles softly on her cheeks.

As much he wants lay down and snuggle with his daughter jisung needs to clean himself up to look more presentable. By the time jisung made it to their share bedroom Minho was gone. No wonder. He must have felt disgust to even look at jisung. Oh he is disgust to look at himself too.

After taking a hot shower he put some layer of clothes because he can feel the cold in his throat and in his head. Which he is pretty sure will take over him before the day end. He hates cold.

Being in kitchen makes him overwhelm. Cooking makes him overwhelm. And doing that alone without anyone's presence while his thoughts runs faster than the speed of ligh makes him wanna throw up. He just don't wanna remember anything that he used to categorized as memories.  They are becoming his trauma. He remember first time entering this kitchen and almost burning the whole house. Remember when he burst out giggling when minho was scolding him with anxious all over his face. He also remember using abnormal amount of his time to learn cooking. He would very much like to hit his head in something so that he will forget all of those.

Before he could do that a small happy sequel broke his thoughts and he never smiled so fast as ryung run to him a plushy tucked under her arm. He picked her up with as much enthusiasm. God he missed her. He let out a giggle when her attempt to hug ger papa tighter didn't favour and only caused a more tighr hug from her papa. She didn’t liked falling asleep without her papa.

"How is my little one?" ryung huffed her chubby cheeks.

"Ryung missed papa" that's endearing but that was also making his heart clench. He hug her one more time and sat her on the kitchen counter. "I'm sorry love. I really didn’t meant to leave you alone. I promise that won't happen again." oh boy did he sound desperate. Ryung made grabby hands with a kissy face. Her way of telling everything is fine now.

"No eating before brushing your teeth" jisung said sternly with a poker face which failed all most immediately because he simply can't. The younger one step back and start mumbling something about how she needs to eat to gather energy to brush her teeth. And jisung with a fond smile reminds her he can't brush her teeth by herself yet so It's him who need energy. She is so cute.

Walking inside the familiar studio he only wished to have a good day before he get back to the place that is nothing but a home named hell.

Everyone here loved ryung. Which is understandable because if someone talk with him with that much stars in their eyes he would have melt too. Which he already did.

Seungmin was beaming with joy. The boy is always so calm and joyful but today he looks like kids at Christmas. Once spotting the brunette the puppy like boy waved at him and jisung swear he saw his friends face dropping after seeing him. Was he looking that pathetic? Oh he hate that. He hate this look. He remember putting some real effort to made himself presentable only for those to go waste.

"You look like you need a coffee" taller boy said as he handed jisung a to go cup. Jisung whisper a little thank you as he looks at the corner where ryung was giggling with some of jisung's students. With the corner of his eyes he see seungmin looking at the same direction with those heart eyes.

"Why do you looks so happy today?" jisung managed to ask once they were packing up to call it a day. "I'm meeting up with a old friend of mine" seungmin once again beaming with joy as he tell jisung. "You looks so happy, must've missed him alot hm?." jisung said as he slung the backpack over his shoulder. Which was full of ryung's different "important things" she said. "It's hard to get a hold of your businessman friends i'm surprised he didn’t forget me yet."  seungmin chuckle.

Not finding words to reply jisung just return the chuckle and made himself busy by picking up ryung who was dozing off on the floor. She nuzzled in his shoulder before falling asleep with the comfort of her papa's familiar cologne.

Her chubby cheeks squished and fluffy hairs sometimes making contact with jisung's neck.

Once they were out of the building with seungmin cooing over several times over how cute ryung looks they saw a very fancy black car waiting infront of the building. Don't ask him anything about the too "fancy" car because he know no shit about them. The building is small and is not anywhere near the town road so It's very very rare to see this types of car seeing around her. He figured it might be the businessman friend who apparently didn’t forget seungmin. Yet.

When he saw a figure coming out of the car jisung figure that's the friend and jisung thought that's his cue to leave them alone. But when the figure too fimilar and when the figure locked eyes with him he froze. Jisung hates his body for not listening to him whenever they needed to. He feel dizzy and he can't possibly ruin his friend's day by making any scenes here.

With all too much thoughts he didn’t catch seungmin's greeting with his friend but his thought broke when seungmin come infront of him dragging his friend who looks almost unbother and have blank expression. Why do jisung care that much? He don't know. Why do the last nights words that were told to hin were ringing unstoppably inside his head? He don't know. Oh he hate himself, he hate everything that's happening.

"Hyunjin met my new bestfriend jisung who is entirely better than you who is also happen to be my business partner." seungmin said. His voice is higher than usual probably with all those excitement. "And jisung this hyunjin the one i was talking about." he adds furthermore. His breathe hitched, eyes getting hazy. He forced a smile as he struggle to bow with ryung clinging to him. He needs to live.

"I think i will get going then" jisung said looking at the pair but also trying not to make eye contact with the tall figure whose stare was now digging hole inside jisung's skull. "But i thought we will eat together" seungmin said with a exaggerating pout. "You see ryung is sleeping and if i wake her up she will throw tantrum for atleast one hour. You enjoy the moment with your bestfriend. He must've missed you too." the last part made his tongue bitter. It's hurting his entire soul and body. Friend. Bestfriends.

"We can atleast drop you off home it will be alot of struggle to take bus with ryung sleeping." if he could he would have laugh loudly about his friends words. They are funny. This world is so funny. "It's ok i got this bye" jisung waved him and leave the place as fast as he could. He might have made eye contact with "seungmin's bestfriend" one more time but he wants to forget that so that he won't ugly cry outside.

Forgive any mistakes.Your words are much needed for me to improve myself. Leave your words about the update.
                                                        --star☆

Take care of yourself lovies<3