In Mr. Turner's class-

"Cyrano de Bergerac stands in the shadows whispering poetry to the lovely Roxanne, but she thinks it's the good-looking guy speaking to her. So our poor, big-nosed lug wins the heart of the woman he loves, but he wins it for somebody else," Mr. Turner said.

"That is so sweet and so noble, that he would sacrifice his own happiness to help his friend," Topy said.

"Other opinions?"

"Loser!" everyone exclaimed.

"Okay, define 'loser.'"

"Big dip," Shawn spoke.

"It makes no sense. I mean, he likes this girl and then he passes her on to another guy," Cory said.

"Dip the biggest."

Mr. Turner sat on his desk. "Topanga, can you refute the dip theory?" 

"Cyrano performs a totally selfless act and he does it for the sake of love," Topy answered.

"That is so romantic," I smiled.

"Why? What does he get out of it? He knocks himself out spewing poetry, his friend gets the girl All he can do is go home and blow his big nose," Shawn said.

"Betty, rebuttal from the estrogen section," Mr. Turner said.

"My pleasure," I agree. "Some boys don't understand passion and romance, and will never understand women."

Topy turned to look at the boys. "And that's why all of you will spend half your lives confused and the other half paying alimony."

"This is interesting," Mr. Turner said. "The women here find Cyrano compelling and romantic, and yet the men find him misguided and dip like. What does this tell us?"

"Women like dips?" Cory suggested.

"Sorry, Matthews, no luck. It tells us that men have a hard time understanding what women find romantic."

"Will that be on the test?" Shawn asked.

"Oh, yeah, in ways you can not yet imagine." 

I turn to look at Shawn with a smirk. "Uh oh," he muttered.

***

I was at my locker, pulling out my math book when a pair of hands were placed over my eyes. 

"Wait, don't tell me," I reached behind, touching someone's hair. "My Shawny?"

He uncovered my eyes, letting me turn to look at him. "How'd you know?"

"I know your hair anywhere," I answer. 

"Uh, Betts, me and Cory kind of need your help?" Shawn asked.

"Of course you do," I chuckled.

"See, me and Cory got into a mess with Harley Keiner and now Frankie's going to kill us if we don't help him woo...whatever that means," Shawn said.

I nod. "Okay, Shawn. First, to woo means to try and get the love of someone."

"Oh..."

"And second, I need a break from the shenanigans especially, the ones you guys dig yourself into," I say, turning back to my locker.

"Please, Betts. Frankie won't turn you into a piñata. I love you and you're so smart," Shawn said.

I suddenly froze, my math book nearly dropping at my feet, but I caught it. "Wait, what did you just say?" I ask.

Shawn paused, his smiling fading. "Um...you're so smart?"

I smiled nervously. "No, before that."

"Please, Betts. Frankie won't turn you into a piñata?"

"After that."

Shawn paused. "You're so smart."

I sighed in relief as did Shawn. "Okay, sorry. I must've misheard something. Yeah, I'll help you and Cory."

Shawn grinned. "Yeah, thank you." He pecked my lips. "You are the best."

***

We walked Frankie to Cory's house where Eric greeted us as soon as we entered, "Hey, Cor."

"Hi," Cory said.

"Shawn. Betty."

"Hiya," I say back as I Frankie entered.

Eric screamed in fear as Frankie entered.

"Eric, you know Frankie Stecchino. Frankie, this is my brother Eric," Cory introduced.

"Sure, Eric, I stole your lunch everyday, ninth grade. Don't tell me-tuna on white," Frankie said.

"Wheat," Eric corrected.

"Right, right. Those were days, huh?"

"Excuse me." Eric quickly turned to us. "What's the enforcer doing in our house?"

"We have it under control," Shawn told him.

"It's fine," Cory added.

"You don't need to worry," I say.

"Under control?' Frankie Stecchino sprinkles guys like you on his pizza," Eric said.

"Eric, please, everything's fine," Cory replied.

"Okay. Just remember, no sudden movements, no shiny objects in front of his face. Okay?" Eric looked to Frankie. "It was nice seeing you again, Frankie."

"Nice to see you again, tuna," Frankie replied.

"Yeah."

Once Eric was upstairs, Frankie walked closer to us. "Okay, guys, teach me in the ways of love."

"All right, Frankie. This girl you like, you ever try to talk to her?" Shawn asked.

Oh, I uh, I-I-I..."

It was pretty amusing watching Frankie get tongue-tied as Shawn said,
"You can not let her psych you, man. You just gotta walk right up to her and tell her you like her, okay?"

"Easy peasy, can you do that?" I ask.

"Oh..." Frankie trailed off.

"Okay." Shawn picked up a lamp. "Let's pretend that this is her."

"Could the pillow be her?" Frankie asked.

"Anything you want, Frankster," I say, handing Cory a pillow.

Cory held up the pillow as Shawn said, "Ah, there she is. Ooh she looks very pretty today."

"I'd better go." Frankie tried to back away.

Shawn kept him in place. "Ah, come on. Come on, tell her how nice she looks."

Frankie was silent. "Come on, pal," I encourage.

He was still silent. "I can't take my eyes off you," Shawn told him.

"I can't take my eyes off you," Frankie repeated to the pillow.

"Thank you, Frankie. That's real nice," Cory mimicked a girl's voice.

"I just wanted to tell you how pretty that dress is," Shawn said.

"I just wanted to tell you how pretty that dress is," Frankie repeated, once more.

"Oh, this old thing," Cory said in his girly voice.

"There you go, you can do this," I encourage.

"No, no, no I could never do this by myself. You guys have to come with me," Frankie said.

"Frankie, I don't think that's a good idea."

"Yeah, I think she's gonna notice us hanging around you. I mean, what are you gonna do, put us in your locker?" Cory asked.

***

"I never thought it was physically possible to have three people fit in one locker," I grunt, chest to chest with Shawn and Cory squeezed beside us.

"Stay with me here," Frankie said, outside of the locker.

"Frankie, it's not like there's a back way out of here," Cory sassed.

"I know, I checked."

"Frankie, you're talking to yourself," I recognized a girl's New York accent.

"Not really. See, I uh-oh-"

"She sound familiar to you?" Cory asked us.

I nod while Shawn said, "Quiet!" Shawn looked forward, but it felt like he was staring at me. "This is hard for me to say."

"This is hard for me today," Frankie repeated wrongly.

"Because I've watched you for so long. And I've always dreamed of telling you how I feel about you."

I paused as Frankie said, "Because I've watched you so long. And I've always dreamed of something."

"What are you saying?" the girl asked.

"I love you!"

"I love you," Frankie repeated.

"You do?" the girl asked.

"I've always loved you. I think about you all the time. If you were my girl, I would treat you like the magic princess that you are."

"You know, your friend never talks to me like this."

"Perhaps he is not racked with the love that consumes his entire being. You wanna go get a burger?"

"I would love to," she answered.

"Shawn, I just figured out who that girl was," Cory spoke.

"Oh no," I say in realization.

"Hey, she likes him. We did it," Shawn said.

"Oh, we did it all right. We just fixed up Frankie with Harley Keiner's girlfriend," Cory answered.

"That's not possible."

We opened the locker, me and Shawn stepping out and seeing Frankie and Gloria.

Shawn and I point with a gasp, which Frankie didn't understand because he followed our actions, doing the same at Gloria.

"Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy! We're in such trouble here," Cory said, getting out of the locker.

"No, nobody saw us. No witnesses. And without witnesses, it's all just circumcised evidence," Shawn replied.

"You've been watching too much NYPD Blue," I tell him.

"Shawn, we just helped Frankie snake Harley's girlfriend. I mean, we gave him love lessons, we hid in the locker, we told him what to say. How is that not trouble?" Cory asked.

Okay, let me think. Uh, protective custody, plastic surgery Ah! We dress up as girls, pretend we're our out-of-town cousins and say we haven't seen ourselves," Shawn said.

"I don't need to do that, I'm fine with Harley," I cross my arms.

"No, that'll never work," Cory said.

"Oh, yeah? Tell my Uncle Mary," Shawn replied.

Cory froze as he saw Harley approach and say, "Harley! How are ya?" 

Shawn pushed me in front of him, but still held onto me as Harley said, "Didn't I tell Frankie to dispose of you guys?" 

"Yes, and he did. He killed us big time," Shawn said.

"And now we're the angels of ourselves," Cory lied.

"And it's time for us to float away."

Both of them started doing goofy moves as if they were flyimg away. "Float...float..."

"Goodbye, my angels," I tell them.

"Either of you angels see my girl?" Harley asked.

"You mean Gloria?" Cory asked.

"No, we haven't seen her," Shawn answered.

"No, there's no reason we could have seen her."

"We were in the locker the whole time."

I facepalm myself. "Idiots."

"The whole time what, boys?" Harley asked.

"Come on, Shawn. Float...float..." They did the goofy moves, but Harley grabbed them both.

***

I went home, Shawn came through the door. "Betts, we gotta talk."

I smiled, getting up from the coucb. "Hey, you're not actually dead. Wait," I cup his face. "Are you an angel?"

"I'm alive, but you're my angel."

"Aw," I kiss his cheek. "You're sweet." I sat back on the couch. "What do you want to talk about?"

"Okay, this is hard for me to say."

"Why does this sound familiar?"

"Because I've watched you for so long, years as your friend and now boyfriend. And I've always dreamed of telling you how I feel about you."

"Uh, Shawn?"

"I love you," he quickly said.

"Huh?!" I ask, panicking.

"Usually the girl says 'I love you too'."

"You love me?" I ask, standing up.

"Yeah, I love you, Betty Cooper. I don't think I've ever felt this way about someone. You're my first real relationship and after seeing Frankie with Gloria, I thought I'd tell you that I love you again."

"Wait, you actually told me...that yesterday?"

"Yeah, but I got nervous. You started questioning me and I pretended like it never happened."

"Oh," I say, going silent.

"Well, do you love me?" Shawn asked.

"Um...I like you."

"But you don't love me. Wow, that hurts."

"Shawn, I like you a lot, but it feels like you're rushing."

"I'm just telling you how I feel after years..."

"But we just started dating a month ago."

"And a half!" he exclaimed.

"Yes, but it's too soon, too fast. I mean, we're kids, Shawny. We don't know the first thing about relationships or love, but I care about you. We're going to learn through high school, okay?" Shawn was silent. "Please, say something."

"You're right," Shawn said. "I said it too soon. And I just started calling you my girlfriend, it makes sense."

"Does this change how you feel about me?" I ask, nervously.

"No, I care about you, Betts. But a kiss would help my pain," he frowned, placing a hand over his chest.

I roll my eyes playfully. "Ugh, get over here."

I walked up to Shawn, pressing my lips to his.

***