it would have hurt less had i never seen you again. had you packed up your life and moved on with it, truly moved. but the fact that i still saw you at all meant that i still saw you everywhere: in a stranger's face, in the reflection of a passing train, on the insides of my eyelids as i fell asleep. i had nowhere to run without you chasing, nowhere to turn without your eyes staring back at me.

i had nowhere without you.