Like I have already mentioned in Don't no 15, romanticizing is a big problem whether it is for any disorder or for other cases like self harm, abuse etc.

But I had to make a separate chapter for it because the number of such fanfics (or books in general) has been increasing day by day.

Well, first let me tell you what romanticize means. The literal definition of the word is as follows:

"To think about or describe something as being better or more attractive or interesting than it really is: to show, describe, or think about something in a romantic way."

See, even in the definition it is clearly stated being better or attractive than it really is. Which means that it isn't that ideal as it is being portrayed.

Now obviously, the first question that rises in our minds is that why did romanticizing become so popular in the first place given that it is unrealistic?

The answer to that is very simple.

These days people have access to everything, the society is more open about stuff than it used to be and everyone gets their right to express whatever they want to. Basically, people take part more openly today as compared to their involvement in the past.

And ever since these interactive people found out about how other people suffer from depression/anxiety etc and other disorders or painful factors, they took it upon themselves to give their own opinions regarding such matters and also be positive about it. But what happened was them taking positive too far such that the actual reason for which they rose their voice was abandoned and thus the monster of Romanticizing was born.

Yeah, it was born with good intentions. But it all took a rather negative spin on the society. 

How, you will ask?

For example, let's consider depression. A lot of people suffer from depression and it is that disorder which is mentioned a lot in literature. People started to write about depression in order to give representation to people who were suffering from depression. Then the writers began to portray depression like it wasn't a very doleful thing and it was okay to depressed. I know they had good intentions but they all ended up romanticizing it which made people who weren't having depression become attracted to it.

And that is as worse as it can get. People began to think that they were depressed and that it was cool. A lot many teenagers would cut themselves claiming they were emo/depressed. Despite the fact that being emo isn't quite literally being depressed, but whatever, people became attracted to depression.

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Similarly there are many aspects in literature which are romanticized by author, the foremost being mental/health disorders for example anorexia, depression etc. Then comes self harm and abusive relationships and then is the case of other factors such as war, addiction, drugs etc.

We will discuss about all of them one by one.

1. Mental disorders/illnesses:

It isn't a new thing for mental illnesses to be romanticized the biggest example being depression and anxiety.

If a person is depressed it doesn't mean that he/she needs a love interest in their lives. It doesn't mean that he/she can't fend for themselves on their own and are desperate for someone to support them.

2. Health disorders:

The health disorders which are most romanticized are anorexia and obesity. Anorexia is portrayed as the giver of a Barbie doll figure while obesity is described as cute.

Anorexic people aren't Barbie dolls, they need to get proper medical treatment or else it could become dangerous for them. Same is the case for those who are obese.

I'm not shunning these disorders and I'm not calling them disgusting. Of course people suffering from such disorders are human and should not be treated any differently. What I'm asking is to stop writing stories that promote other people to have these disorders.

These days girls starve themselves to have Anorexia and it isn't a good thing at all.

3. Self Harm:

Now this is one thing which is the most outrageous for me. And should be for you as well. Self harm I'd portrayed not as a harmful activity but as a potential after effect of heartbreak. So girl self harms because she is such a damsel in distress and then this charming guy steps in to fix her life.

Honestly, just stop with these stories.

4. Abuse:

Abusive relationships can not be classified as romantic relationships. If a person is in an abusive relationship, I would seriously advise him/her to step out of it no matter how much you are made to think that your partner loves you.

If someone abuses their partner emotionally or physically, it isn't just because they're going through a rough phase or are just possessive about their spouses.

It's called abuse and you need to put a stop to it.

Abuse isn't romantic. Accept the facts please.

What I've usually seen is that stories related to Vampires and Werewolves indirectly begin to edge towards romanticizing abuse in relationships.

Just because you're focusing on a predatory species as the centre of your work, it doesn't mean that you are going to highlight and then romanticize their abusive behavior towards their partners (or in other words, their prey).

"And so the lion fell in love with the lamb..."

[I'm sorry I can't stop with references myself but then this is a random opinion book so why not?]

5. Suicidal Tendencies:

The only writer who can write a case of suicidal tendencies appropriately, in my opinion, is Paulo Coelho.

Other writers end up romanticizing it and the outcome is horrible, trust me. It becomes the same damsel in distress case mentioned above in the self harm category.

And one important thing to remember: Suicide isn't noble self sacrifice.

6. Stalking / Perverted Behavior:

If a person watches you at night while you're sleeping, or follows you around, or breaks into your room through your window, it's not that he is your one true love.

He's a stalker. So call the cops instead of marrying him.

Authors need to stop implying the fact that a stalker could be the best man in the whole wide world for a girl. Because if that's the case, they are no doubt promoting stalking.

Being a stalker doesn't mean you are so in love with that person. It means you're obsessed. And you're posing threat to said person's safety and invading his/her privacy without permission.

7. War:

There was a time when writing about wars became a trend. But that only led people to encourage war. War was romanticized a lot.

How, you'll ask?

Well basically a bunch of stories were written about how being a devoted soldier gauged a man's patriotism and love for the country. Of course, being patriotic isn't a sin. We should all love our country. But what I'm speaking against is the spreading of war and it's promotion.

Young minds often see this in a very different context than it actually is and if such literature comes out encouraging them in the wrong direction then dangers are sure to be on the way.

War is dreadful. People die. Families are ruined. Children are orphaned. Women are widowed and taken up as slaves.

It isn't a f*cking fairytale.

So stop war please, don't promote it.

8. Addiction:

Being addicted to anything is dangerous. For starters, addiction itself means obsessed to an unhealthy extent.

Or in the actual dictionary words:

Being abnormally tolerant to and dependent on something that is psychologically or physically habit-forming (especially alcohol or narcotic drugs).

Being addicted to alcohol, narcotics, smoking etc isn't cool and it sure as hell isn't attractive.

Know who I blame for the, romanticizing of such addictive behaviors? The Bad Boy Plague obviously.

9. Drugs:

Quite same as addiction really. If author is writing about a bad boy/girl who is a bit rebellious, it becomes almost necessary for drugs to get involved.

Teenagers have started to think that drugs are cool. Doing weed or marijuana is considered as fashionable. And trust me, it leads to a great many other problems such as health adversities and all in all ruining of whole careers. 

10. Psychopathy / Sociopath:

Well, this era is the literary era for the psychopaths. That's why I kept this in the last.

These days, psychopaths/sociopaths are very much in since you'll easily find a lot of books written on them.

Literal Definition: a person with an antisocial personality disorder.

They are often confused with introverts but that is a totally different case. Psychopath/sociopath person is not only antisocial but also a lot different from normal people. They like repetitive work, they have odd habits (idiosyncrasies) and if angered can prove to be dangerous.

They are romanticized in those stories where there is some Norman Bates who just needs help and someone to fix his life and in steps the lead female character ready to take up the task.

This is also probably the worst sort of romanticized factor because it involves nearly all the above factors like mental illness, abuse, self harm, addiction, drugs, stalking, suicidal tendencies and the list could go on forever.

[Write about a psychopath if you want but please don't make it look like some twisted High School movie, for literature's sake].

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Romanticizing stuff isn't going to help your story become a bestseller and is not doing anything positive for your audience. So if any of you are thinking about romanticizing any of the above stated categories, please don't.

Because in doing so you are just encouraging a lot many factors in the society which should never have been born in the first place. People are cutting themselves up, resorting to suicide and such painful stuff just because they think it is a trend or rather it is beautiful as described in books nowadays.

#painisn'tpretty

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Hope this chapter helped.