Samuel's POV:

After speaking to Toby, he allowed me to see Tatum.

I've been sitting here by her side for hours. A few tears staining my cheeks as I watch her sleep. It doesn't feel good to see her like this. She's not her old happy self and it hurts me to see how broken she is. On the bright side, she's getting some rest and I don't want to disturb her. I just hope that she heals from this hurt.Sitting here in her presence is enough for me,we don't have to talk.

I feel a slight ache in my neck. I rub the spot behind my neck to ease the pain. Sitting straight up this long is killing my back.I decide to remove my shoes and lay down next to her, slowly making sure not to disturb her.I lay on my side facing her. She's so peaceful when she's sleeping.

I always denied it, but I should have known it was you. I should have known that you were my Tatum.It's no wonder I was so drawn to you. I still love you. I'd still do anything for you. Pathetic right? She wants nothing to do with me, but I can't help but to fall at her feet. What's worse is that I'm completely fine with it. I'll let this woman break my heart over and over again, if it means I could spend some time with her.

"I love you so much."I whisper.

...

I open my eyes to hazy moonlight coming in from a window. Where am I? It takes a second for me to  register my whereabouts.

I blink a few times to centralise my vision. When did I even fall asleep? Tatum!

I look over next to me and she's lying awake just staring at her white bedroom ceiling. A thousand emotions wash over her face as she stares into space. Her thoughts are killing her. I can tell by the paleness of her skin. She's hurting.

I raise my hand to touch her, but doubt whether it will be too much for her or not. I put my hand back down and instead I decide to speak.

"Tatum."I say as lightly as possible.

"Tatum it's okay. I'm here for you. You don't have to speak. I know that you're hurting, but I just want you to know that I'll always be here and I'll always love you.You don't have to go through this alone. We are all here for you.In time everything will be okay again,Tatum."

Not expecting her to say anything I close my eyes for a moment and take a breath in before I continue. I open my mouth to speak, but by my surprise she beat me to it. It felt like magic hearing her voice again, but it hurt like a dagger piercing right through my heart to hear the pain in her voice,"Do you hate me?"

"Tatum.I would never.I could never hate you."

"I feel so guilty,I can't even face you. You here after everything.After lying to you all this time, you still came back. It's not fair to you. I don't deserve you Samuel. I lied to you, but you still care. How can you love me after what I did to you?"She says still not facing me.

"You don't have to feel guilty. You did what you thought was the right thing at that time-"

"-And I was wrong. So wrong."She says, her voice cracking and a single tear streaming down the side of her face. I so badly want to kiss those tears away, but now is not the time.

"It's not your fault Tatum.None of this is your fault. For these past years you've had it harder than I have. You've had to deal with many things alone."I say.

"But that doesn't erase the fact that you got hurt in my mess!"She says a little louder this time as if she's angry at herself.

"Tatum I-"

"And now they're gone as well!"She suddenly bursts into tears. I know the 'they' she's referring to is Brandon and their baby.

"Tatum-"I sit in to look at her.

"You should go Samuel. Try to get far away from me as possible."She says.

"Why would I want to do that? You need me."

"It doesn't matter what I need. I think that it's meant for me to be alone, because whenever I get close to anyone their lives crumble because of me.I can't hurt you too Samuel. I won't be able to handle it if I lose you as well. So you better go."She says.

"I won't leave you Tatum. I'll never leave you."

"Just go!"She shouts.

"No Tatum! No!I won't let you push me away this time. I'm not letting go of you again."I say sincerely and move closer to her, but she resists, fighting me,pushing me away.

I grab ahold onto her arms and pull her against my chest, holding her close.

"No. You'll be safe away from me."She cries.

I lull her as I caress her hair and she soon subsides.

She rests into me and holds onto me tightly.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."She cries regretfully into my chest.

"It's okay. It's okay."I whisper into her ear.

Toby walks into the room, but stops in his tracks when he sees us and he nods at me then turns around to leave.

We just sat like that for a moment. In each others arms, just holding each other close in silence.The only thing making sound is Tatum's sniffling.

She pulls away slowly to look at me. Those mesmerising eyes of her,one thing that I have never forgotten. One thing that will never change,but those eyes don't hold the same jubilance anymore. Instead it's replaced by a dark void.

"How can you still love and not be mad at me for what I did?"She asks once more.

"Tatum, I'll say this a thousand times if I have to. I'll always love you, no matter what. Love doesn't just go away because of circumstances. It's always there,it just changes sometimes,but it's always there."I say placing my palm of her cheek,she leans into my hand closing her eyes in comfort for a split second,then looks back up at me.

"Samuel, I can't give you what you want. I can't give you what you deserve."She says. I know that it's true,it's hurt, but it's not right for me to expect it from her after everything she has been through.

"I don't want anything from you Tatum. I just want to be here for you. I want you to be happy again. I want you to have days where your early mornings feels like magic, where your playlist makes you want to dance like you used to. I want you to have days where strangers make you smile,and nights where the evening sky touches your soul. I want you to fall in love with being alive again. Not because of my love for you, but because it's what you deserve."I say wholeheartedly meaning every word.

"What about what you deserve? The world doesn't revolve around around me Samuel. You're hurting too. You deserve way better than me. Why should you be here for me, when all I ever did was push you away?"She says and I take a deep breath in and then exhale.

"That day. When you left..."I sigh before continuing,"The day of the accident, I went to look for you a few days later. I regretted everything that I said to you that day. I was acting like a complete asshole and I realised that. So I went to look for you and when they told me that you never joined them on the tour I panicked. My heart sank. I came back home and looked for you for all these years and I couldn't find you. Then when I heard your voice that day at the beach when we bumped into each other, my heart raised in anticipation to see you again-"

"But you were disappointed, because it's not the face you recognise."She cuts me off.

"No, not at all. I was bewildered. Your eyes caught my attention when I looked at you first. It's like I could feel that it was you,but my head couldn't, wouldn't put the logic into it to make enough sense.I should have listened to heart instead of my head. My head told me that it was impossible that you could be right in front of me especially after searching for you for so long, but my heart always leaned towards you. Always.I've tried to move on from you, but I can't. I can't get you out of my head and heart. You're all I ever think about. All I ask for is for you to get better. I hate seeing you so sad. I miss the sparkling light in your eyes. The bright smile on your beautiful face.I love you so much, but I don't want to pressure you into a relationship and I won't. All I want is to be here by your side, to support you.I don't expect anything from you. I just want you to focus on yourself."I say and it leaves her silent for a mere second.

"Thank you."She says and hugs me.

I embrace her closely.I missed her so much.

"Can I come in?"Toby says, lightly knocking on her bedroom door.

She let's go of me faces him then nods and wipe away stray tears. A look of concern flashes over Toby's face as he sits down next to her.

"I'll leave you two alone."

"Don't go!"Tatum grabs onto my jacket stopping me from leaving.

"It's okay."Toby says nodding at me in acceptance. I sit back down next to her.

"How are you feeling?"Toby asks while rubbish her back.

"How do I look?"She asks him pointedly.

"Like shit."He says and she laughs for a mere second.

"Yeah. I feel like shit."She says now in all seriousness.

"Don't worry. It'll be okay."Toby says reassuringly.

"I still can't believe it's over. That they're gone. I don't think that I'll ever be able to accept it."

"Tatum we'll get through this together."I say placing my hand on hers.

She wipes a tear and looks at Toby.

"How is Benjamin?"She asks.

"Dad is with him at the moment."Toby replies vaguely.

"He's not dealing with it well. Of course he's not, he lost he only son."Tatum says, her voice cracking at the last part.

"Umm. I think I...I wanna sleep now please."She says quickly trying to keep in the tears. I know exactly what she means. She wants to be left alone, it's still hurting her a lot.

"Okay we'll leave you to sleep."Toby and I share a glance.I nod at him knowingly.

"Thank you."She whispers.

Toby and I exited her bedroom.

"Does this happen often?"I ask.

"It used to happen earlier, when she first found out about Brandon and the baby. And not it's happening again. Her mood swings will change rapidly in the future.I don't know if it's a good or bad thing. I'll have to inform the doctor about this."He says.

"Okay then."I sigh before continuing,"How will she be able to face that damn man in court?"

"I don't even want to think about it now. She can't, she's in a state."

"I know, but he needs to pay for what he has done."I say.

"I know."Toby says frustratedly.

"Something feels off about this whole thing. If he wanted Cassie, why didn't he just take her. He could have, but I feel like he was there for something else."I point out.

"I don't know maybe something else is going on, but I honestly don't care. All I want is for Tatum to get better."

"Yeah me too."

I have a strange feeling about everything.