I woke up next to Michael and as I opened my eyes I saw his beautiful, brown eyes staring into mine. He lay on his back in his white undershirt and immediately took my hand, smiling widely at me.

"Good morning baby" He whispered and pulled me into a slow kiss, his warm hand on my back. He was eager – something that was new and I smiled in between kisses. What he went through last night really had had a good effect on him.

"Ok baby...baby!" I brought out, breathless and held his cheeks. "hold on a moment" I giggled and took some time to breath. I kept my hands on his cheeks, just staring into his glistening eyes, but I couldn't keep myself back that long and went in for another round of kisses.

"Michael, thank you for this wonderful wake up" I giggled and run my fingers down his chest, then fell back into my fluffy pillow.

"Thank you for last night" Michael raised one of his eyebrows and we both laughed. I took his hand. "Are you not mad at me for...just going through with it when you said stop? I mean, I know you wanted me to do that but...it wasn't easy, believe me."

"Nah, I'm not angry with you for that, I'm glad you did. It was all worth it in the end." The sides of his lips curled up in a smile. "But you surprised me, I didn't know you could be that...dominant and the stuff you did, man with that duster thing" He shook his head and I could see his cheeks turning a light shade of pink.

I giggled. "Gosh I know, that really made you go crazy" We both laughed and I picked up the feather duster that still lay on the floor.

"No, no, lay that thing away Susan" He put his arms out and fought it off of him. "Wait, the phone is ringing." He got up to look who was calling us.

"Susan? It's your mom, she wants to talk to you" He called me from the hallway. I went outside and took the phone in my hands, putting a quick kiss on Michaels cheek.

"Hello Mom"

"Hi Susan, are you having a good time?" My mother giggled.

"Yes, quite a good time" I winked at Michael who stood behind me. "Why are you giggling?"

"I just heard you kiss, that's all" She chuckled again. I knew my mom was very happy for me, and I'm glad she took it so well that I lived quite far from her now.

"But uhm, Susan, I really don't want to interrupt your happy mood, but I called for a reason." She said and I suddenly felt nervous. Did something happen to her? Or was there a rumor about Michael and me? I turned around as Michael tapped my shoulder and showed me that he was just going to the bathroom. I nodded and smiled.

"So, you know Christmas is coming and we will celebrate with Joanna (my stepsister) and Derek (stepfather) and there are some other people from their family coming. Cassie is coming, her parents are out of the country over the holidays. I know you're gonna wanna be there, but with that many people coming, I...I don't think it's possible for you to bring Michael without something leaking to the public."

I felt like somebody had punched me in the stomach.

"But...Michael wanted to celebrate it for the first time, I mean – he was so excited, he IS so excited about this he talks about it every day!" I stuttered.

"Susan, he's gonna be fine, he knows a lot of people. He's Michael Jackson!" She tried to lift up my mood. She had no idea, there were few people that Michael could spend genuine happy time with. And I also wanted to spend it with him!

"No, mom, I can't come like this. I want to spend Christmas with Michael."

"Susan, come on. Everybody of the family will come, Cassie, your BEST FRIEND comes and you can't leave her alone with us, she's your friend. And Derek hasn't seen you for a year. And I want my daughter here, you're constantly with Michael."

"Mom I don't know, it breaks my heart." I whined.

"Look, you'll come over from the 23rd to the 26th, so that's only 3 days without him, you can do that. He's gonna be fine. I have to go now Susan, talk to you later."

"Bye" I sighed and slowly hung up. I went back into our room and sat on the bed, putting my head in my hands. Michael was still in the bathroom, I heard him taking a shower.

I couldn't do this to him, he wanted to celebrate Christmas with me so bad, his first Christmas! These last few weeks he had been talking about it so much, how he was looking forward to singing Christmas songs with me, which he was already doing, and exchanging presents and so on. I felt my eyes getting watery, I couldn't enjoy Christmas knowing that Michael was all alone at Neverland!

Suddenly the door swung open and Michael came in, wearing his black pants and a red sweater. He came over to me and sat down beside me.

"Susan, what's wrong?" He asked and put a kiss on my cheek. I swallowed, now I had to tell him, there was no way out.

"Michael..."I I sighed. "Mom called me and told me that, she wants me over for Christmas, my whole family is there and my best friend Cassie and other people" I got chocked up and whipped away my tears. I wanted to celebrate with him, I was the one who was supposed to sit there with him by the tree!

Michael was silent. "Susan...it's ok, that's ok. I want you to have a normal life with your family. Everyone celebrated with their family, it's just I can't do that. I don't want you to give up your traditions for me. I'll be fine baby" He rubbed my back.

"Susan, please don't cry. I'll be alright. I'll eat cookies and enjoy a book and time flies and you're here with me again." He hugged me from the side.

"And then you have to go on tour" I sobbed as I realized it. By the start of the new year he had to go on the dangerous tour.

"Oh, right...I didn't even think of that right now...that's bad" He fell silent, then stood up and went to the bathroom. I heard him clean his nose and I went to the door, looking through the crack. He stood in front of the mirror, his eyes were red and a tear rolled down his cheek, then dropped down onto his funny Christmas socks.